Getting picked on and provoked for no reason

So here is my problem: I find that I am often getting picked on and provoked for no reason. People direct their attention and energy in a negative way toward me. For no rational or apparent reason. And I don't understand why.

Today I went for a walk in an area where there are lots of people walking around. I sat down on a bench to relax and look at the river. I had my scarf unwrapped and put it on the back of my head so it flows down to my chest, kind of like a headscarf. I really like the feeling of that and it isn't as warm as when the scarf is wrapped around my neck. Anyways, as I was sitting there a group of young people (around my age, 17-19 years old) two girls and two boys, came in my direction. They were laughing at something. They stopped right behind me, not even a meter behind me and one of the girls loudly said, while giggling nastily: "Hold on, hold on. Imma put this on the (Instagram) Story!" Aside from me on the bench there was no one else around. And they certainly did not seem like the kind to take pictures of the beautiful scenery and share it on social media. I then abruptly stood up and they turned quiet. Then I just casually walked away as if I didn't hear anything or as if I thought their bullshit was not directed at me.
These fuckers had nothing better to do than to laugh at me and loudly proclaim they were going to put me on their social media without my consent.
What the fuck? Is it because they thought I looked funny with the scarf? So what? I also see funny looking people all the time but I don't laugh at them and take pictures of them.

And here comes my true problem: This isn't the first time that shit like this happens to me. It happens all the time. I simply mind my own buisness but then some fuckers have to come along and provoke me. Why?? I thought nobody cares about people outside? Why do they have to go out of their way to provoke me, to ridicule me and to let me know what they are doing?

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Yes so what do you want advice on, friend?


They're trying to make their lives more dramatic. The smart thing is to think about how you'll react. Be unfazed, make them look stupid. If you overreact, it'll make it worse, so next time they do that, maybe turn around, smile, and ask "is there something wrong?" They'll deny it, then you can say something like "I'm sorry, it just seemed like you were looking at me a lot, so I was wondering if there was anything you wanted or that I could help you with."

I've had people pull that shit on me, especially when I was in my early 20s. They're looking to raise their own status among their friends, and you probably look passive, so they don't think you'll make their lives difficult if they abuse you.

WHY do people provoke me or just anyone normal in general? HOW do I avoid it? HOW do I cope with it? HOW do i react?

You are either imagining things or have a disgusting appearance.

What does disgusting mean? I am not fat or deformed in any other way. Im not freakishly tall nor freakishly short. What does disgusting appearance mean in your eyes?

Some people attract more attention than others. I’m also a person like that.

Some people will like you some people will hate you, it’s the way of the world. I don’t think you were wrong to stand up and look at them but just don’t act so aggressively like that next time. Just turn around and ask if they’re talking to you. Most brats think they’re invincible until someone actually calls them out on something, then they don’t want any problems and keep it moving. Never mind them.

I'm curious why the OP didn't find my comment helpful enough to reply.

Without seeing you in person we can only guess. Maybe you smell bad? Wear iffy clothing?

I keep the best and most helpful replies for last because I have to think about them more deeply.

ah okay :)

OP it's not just you, people are just like this in general. Only your friends, if you have any will act like a decent human being.

Sounds good! I'll try reacting like that the next time. The whole thing might become less of an annoyance if it is turned into a game for proving superiority on my part as well.

From the image you included with your post I can deduct that you intentionally act in a manner which makes people pick on you and then feign innocence. Stop it.


People always try to find weakest link to pick on. That will never change, so just stop being this weakest link and toughen up.

If I really am attracting more attention automatically, I should probably think of a way to make use of that.
And calmly calling them out really seems like the way to go.

I smell fine. I always make sure to go out clean and I put on a little bit of cologne for the extra touch. And my clothing is super basic. Black jeans and a button-up with a v-neck. On first sight I will always look normal.

This couldn't be further from the truth. I act in no particular way. I am me. I mind my own buisness. You will only get to know what I am like if you approach me. Not if you look at me from the distance. And the only reason I included this image is because I find it funny and thought it would make people click on this thread.

What link? I am alone most lf the time. What am I the link of?

Damn, guess i'll have to find me some friends

OP, notice how everyone in this thead is giving dumb, almost mean advice? That's because people are just like this. It's not a problem you solve. Everyone is defensive and comes up with dumb compensating strategies often aimed at the expensive of other people. Most of the time people keep these thoughts private, but it easily shows in their body language.

What thoughts do you mean? And in what way does body language reflect them?

You literally write like you are asking for it.

Society. Or group. Loners are mostly the bottom of bottom.

I wrote this angrily because I was pissed off. Are you dumb? Why dont you read the text? I mind my buisness.
In the example I gave I was sitting.
Thats it.
I sat on a bench and looked on a river. What the fuck is there to ask for? In other cases some strangers provoked me I was walking past them. Not looking at them or anything. Literally just walking. Again: What the hell is there to ask for?
That is my issue. There is no apparent reason for me being targeted. Or do you like to negatively direct your attention and energy toward someone simply because they perform a basic activity while near you?

Some people have this thing called "bitch aura".

It's easy to see and sense based on their mannerisms or how they sit and how they hold themselves. It opens random people to fuck with you.

If you're scrawny work out a little. Push your chest out and shoulders. Look strong and it'll stop.

Where do I find more information about this "bitch aura"?

It's a visible lack of confidence and the fact that you are alone that draws these people. I am talking from experience however I am in the same boat as you when it comes to knowing what to do about it.

You can't learn it really, it's inate
Youre best bet is to have confident body language, swole up, shave your head bald and tattoo a giant swastika on your cheek

The answer is simple, ignore them. Pretend they don't exist or are just NPC's.

If you are confronted say what they want to hear or fake a persona catered to that person in order to escape the situation. Over time you'll get better at it.

Also to add to this, get headphones and turn the volume up. You won't have to hear them unless they physically assault you.

This. You should get some friends and play basketball or something. Learn to laugh shit off and stop giving a fuck.

Can't do that. I need to be fully aware of my surroundings at all times. At least when im outside.

How do i get confident body language? From what I can tell i dont really seem all that unconfident. But i might be wrong due to my ego.

If one person is an asshole to you, you met an asshole. If you meet assholes all day, maybe you're the asshole. Reflect on your appearance and behaviour.

I relate to this, OP. It has made me paranoid, anxious and stiff in public, almost a self-fulfilling prophecy.

Unfortunately, sitting on a bench and not being engaged into something makes you vulnerable. I've noticed that people will pick on you if you're alone and NOT on your phone. Being on your phone gives you some protection because people nowadays can't fathom existence without constantly having your eyes in a screen. Looking at a river, sky, nature makes you seem bizarre, imagine that. Melancholy, lonely. Maybe you have the same melancholy / introspective aura when you walk and are not staring into your phone . I sometimes pretend to be on the phone or doing something, anything, to avoid these situations

That shit happens to me very often too. I always assumed it has to do with my appearance (I'm unattractive to say the least) and maybe the fact that I look like I won't say anything back (which is true). I don't know if that applies to your situation but you're not alone if it does.

OP is a bitch in disguise

> Put on scarf over your head like some crazy homelss person
> People react to it

You obviously are asperger with no sense of social awareness

How so? Like i said before: I do literally nothing and get picked on. Even if i really was a bitch: How the fuck can you tell by me sitting or walking?

So you just walk up to homeless people and take pictures of them? Is that the only trigger people need to provoke you? Looking a bit goofy, if anything at all?

they do somehow, I'm in the exact same situation. Would you say you're attractive? Are you a bit self-conscious when walking outside?
Some people are like that. Though I'm sure if that happened to you multiple times you managed to identify what groups of people act this way (teenagers for instance are one of those groups)

I cant really tell how good/bad I look. Sometimes I think I look great, other times I feel like my looks are pretty lacking. And I am definetly a bit self-conscious when outside.