Hey Jow Forums
So I was born in a Mormon family. My mom's family is very Mormon, but she herself is not exceedingly religious. My dad was not religious at all. When I was 4, my parents divorced and my mom remarried 4 years later. I lived with my mom and my dad equally and loved them both along with my sister. My sister is very zealous.
I myself am not very religious and mainly go through the motions in Mormonism as expected. When I go off to college, I'm going to cut ties with the church. I have been living a very "sinful" life (increasingly so), but no one my family knows about that.
Last summer, my dad unexpectedly died. It was very tragic for all of us, but my sister was hit especially hard. She depended on my dad in many ways (he was the smartest and most selfless of all of us). In the wake his death, she has turned again to the religion with a renewed passion. There is a strong disconnect with how my sister and I interpreted his death, which is okay, imo.
However, my sister sees religion as the only way to properly grieve and is trying to get me to participate in the church in a way that makes me uncomfortable. My mom also sees church as an important social connection for me (I don't have any problems with loneliness from my friends). Currently my sister is off in college and she just spent hours to identify our family history back to the 1400s. She wants me to go do "Baptisms for the Dead," and the way the rules work only I can do the baptisms for my ancestors. I don't want to do these at all but I don't know how I should approach the conversation or if I should just go through the motions.
Thanks
Hey Jow Forums
Bump
All that text wall is too much, but Mormons are seriously off their nut crazy. That’s a wacko cult of a religion and anyone wrapped up in that crap should run.
This is some new bait. Very creative OP.
God isn't real, so do whatever you like because you aren't gonna have to answer to anyone after you die. There's just blackness. Nothing. Just as you don't remember anything before you were born, so too will you not have anything after you die.
How is it bait? Im really struggling here
user I've been a long time Mormon and the church is moving in scary directions. Look up the CES letter or just church history. The church is horribly controlling and condescending.
Why not give it a shot user? You see plenty of posts online from college kids feeling loneliness and depression. Having a spirituality and possible connection with family and community isn’t wrong. Talk to your local pastor about your lack of faith. There are worse things in life than doing a few ceremonies you’re not jazzed about.
a fucking stone tablet hidden by god in a field, which he didn't show to anyone and he changed the story halfway through
Give that a re-read.
He's less concerned with judgement from God than he is judgement from family.
Mormon here
Just repent and do them baptisms OP
Pray to believe
Also, you don't have to do your own ancestors. I've done baptisms for other people's ancestors. You can tell her to ask people in her ward to do them if you don't want to, OP
Depending on how long baptisms would take you, I'd say to just fucking go for it. Waste a little bit of time right now and make your sister happy, or you torch the relationship--kind of a no brainer in that sense.
You might come to regret none-participation more later down the road than you would a day's worth of doing some shit you don't really have a vested interest.
Mormonism should be wiped off the earth so I support you op
Two options
Option A : Do it and realize it has no meaning since you do not believe it in anyways. You waste some time but your family continues to get along with you and you continue your fake beliefs
Option B: Fuck everything, tell them you don't want to participate and that you have your own beliefs that you feel you're entitled to. Risky move as it could result in your family starting to cut ties (If The Church hears about this you can kiss your family goodbye by the way. Good luck trying to convince your family that Family > God when it comes to those nutjobs)
sorry but tell your sister to eat fucking shit. this is one of their little dirty tricks to keep you from completely breaking free. attaching as many strings as possible. if they cant attach strings, theyll attach threads. and if they can get away with that whats to stop them from pulling you in a little more, then a little more.
Mormonism in a nutshell
oh boy. Time for you to learn how to deprogram a cultist. Since they're overtly going on the offensive, so should you. Deprogramming comes in 5 stages:
>discredit the authority figure
You talk about either the leader of your closest church or the original cult leader (I recommend the latter as there are many resources about him)
>present contradictions in the ideology
There's plenty to talk about, from the inherent fallacy of an omnipotent god to pointing out the absurdities in mormonism.
>the breaking point
At this point they'll begin listening to what you have to say with much more sincerity. keep performing the previous stages as well.
>self expression
They'll begin voicing their gripes with the church. At this point they'll begin thinking for themselves and seeing the fallacies thenselves
>identification and transference
Your job's pretty much complete. They've stopped believing in these stupid ideas.
Good luck. Keep in mind that this is very much frowned upon due to it being extremely manipulative. Never tell them about this. Not when you're doing it and not after. NEVER.
This will take a while so don't rush it. Get a book on deprogramming to help you. Tear off the cover and replace it with something innocent looking. Since you're in the family already, the kidnapping section has been looked over.
>this whole post
Or he can go to church and have a decent social life instead of pissing everyone off with his half assed, sperg induced ramblings at the family dinner.
You have a book/link about on this stuff? Unrelated, but I always found this interesting and thought it could help in deprogramming fallacious mindsets I hold myself.
I can feel you, OP.
Staying active in the church is hard. I think pretty much everyone gets to a point where they feel distanced from the church, and it's ok to feel like that.
I know that when friends or family try to get you to be more active it makes you uncomfortable, and they probably know that too. It doesn't come from a bad place though.
Your sister could have asked anyone to go to the temple for those names, but she asked you because she wants you to go. She cares about you. If she wants you to go to the temple or stay in the church, it's because she honestly thinks that those things will make you happier, and it's nice that you're that important to her.
If you are living a "sinful" life, then maybe going to the temple isn't a great idea. It really only makes a big difference if you do prepare yourself for it. You dont have anything to gain by going if you have no intentions to go.
I think she'll be ok if you tell her you dont want to go. Theres nothing wrong with telling her how you feel about the church either. Sure she might be a little let down, but she's your family. She has a right to know how you feel about these things, and you have a right to be honest about it instead of hiding it.
Straighten and up and speak your mind. Tell her to fuck off and mind her own business. No one should force their religious beliefs to others.