How do I break up with someone

This is quite a ramble as I am pretty bad at writing and my mind also isn't really at it's normal focus. I apologize.

I have been in a relationship with this guy for 3 and a half years now. We are both 21 years old and it's both our first relationship. We have been living together for a year now. I really did like how stable he was and I thought he would be a great husband that would be faithful to me, but I was never really in love from the start and he doesn't really make me happy. All the people around us also didn't think we would be this long together as everyone (even his own friends) thought that I was too good for him.
I have just come back from a 5 month trip to Japan and after meeting a lot of different people, I actually feel like I can do a lot better and be a lot happier. So I tried breaking up with him, but he really wants to stay in the relationship as he is very in love. I have done so many bad things while I was in Japan and I don't think I can still be in a relationship with him anymore, but he says he really wants a second chance and wants to be able to make me happy, but I don't think I can actually be in love with him as much as he is in love with me. I feel very bad for him and he cried a lot, but he doesn't want to tell anyone else that I said I wanted to break up. He really doesn't want to break up as he's afraid people will say "you see she was too good for you". He has great friends though, which would really support him if they see how sad he is about me leaving but he really doesn't seem to want accept the reality in any way.

I have no idea what to do. I do like our little apartment, even though the atmosphere is pretty awkward at the moment, but I don't want to be living with him anymore. I really feel like I'm being super selfish here and there wouldn't be a problem if I just stayed with him, but I actually want to marry someone that makes me happy.

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Accept that you have to take on the role of bad guy.

You gotta be heartless or at least act heartless.
In the end he's not going to be happy with someone who doesn't really want to be around him but he's too scared/insecure to realize he can do better than you.

>I have done so many bad things while I was in Japan
Like what, are you a cheating slut?

>You gotta be heartless or at least act heartless. In the end he's not going to be happy with someone who doesn't really want to be around him
This is what has been happening for the past days, but he's still trying to make me happy with everything he's got. He says that sometimes he feels like giving up and that it can't be fixed and that he really doesn't see a future for himself and that the only way for him to be happy is to have hope for us.

>Like what, are you a cheating slut?
Yes.

>yes.

Ok so how the fuck is this so complicated? Literally tell him “I am a cheating slut I cheated on you with (how many guys?) and I did (what did you do?).”

Answer the questions in the parentheses, I’m curious. But if you say that shit to him he will dump your cheating ass

Disgusting slut. I was like you once and after many different girls I realized that my discontentment is within me and can't find the solution in another woman. Now I regret breaking up with my first gf that loved me like that poor guy of yours. There's nothing I wouldn't give for a chance to be with her again and make her happy and commit.

I hope you find love though. May experience isn't universal

I think he will start questioning what he can do better than those guys and what made me do it, rather than break up.
What will make him break up if I tell him?

Nobody wants to date a cheating slut. Once a cheater always a cheater. You already cheated on him a lot. You’ll do it again, and your future boyfriends too

What about this guy .
I don't know. He already told me it feels like I cheated, but he still doesn't want to break up.

>I'm too good for him

No, you aren't, you are a fucking whore. Just break up with him, HE deserves better

Well he’s a cuck

Actually after re-reading that thread, I think it’s fake pasta

>Just break up with him
Is what I'm trying to do here.

You're a worthless, spineless, disgusting piece of shit

I'd tell you to kill yourself but that'd be forsaking my belief in personal redemption, no matter how unlikely that is for a pissant as pathetic as you

Lass... just literally tell him every atrocity you committed in Japan. Tell him how many yellow dicks you took. It will be overwhelming to him and then you just leave and don’t communicate with him anymore.

First off, cheating is gross. You really shouldn't have done that. I hope you learn your lesson and not do that to the next person you're with.

Honestly, you're going to have to put your foot down. Stop bullshitting. Tell him that you cheated on him, that you can't love him, and fucking dump him already. Why would you even want to be with a guy that lets you push him around? And why would a guy that clearly would do anything for you want to be with someone who cheated on him and doesn't give him the love he deserves? Do both of yourselves a favor, woman up, and break up with him. Don't take no for an answer.

It's always hilarious seeing how the mere mention of a woman cheating sends 4channer men into an absolute blinding rage.

Cheating is disgusting regardless if it’s a man or woman. Both should be put to death

>Take him to a public place where you can talk
>Explain to him that you are not happy anymore and want to break up
>He will cry and beg, be firm
>Don't Tell him about the cheating stuff, he will be miserable enough
>Block him on every social media
> Go suck random dicks like the piece of shit whore you are

Such an extreme reaction user. Who hurt you?

>implying cheating is ok

>First off, cheating is gross. You really shouldn't have done that. I hope you learn your lesson and not do that to the next person you're with.
I know. I've been wanting to break up for a while. We were fighting a lot before I went away and should've ended it before, but I was never really sure, but now I know I really don't want to continue this.
>Don't take no for an answer.
How do I do this? Are we supposed to get into a fight? Is it possible to break up peacefully when there is someone with a lot of feelings?

OP, you got to harden your heart and move out. This part always sucks and guys begging, they always do, makes it worse. Thing is even if they aren't really in love with you either they cannot handle a girl breaking it off with them and they damn sure can't handle thinking of you having sex with another guy.

Anyway, save a little money, harden your heart against his begging, line up where you will move and nicely but firmly tell him two days before you move when, and then move.

When you move do not pretend to be his friend, that will just give him hope and hope keeps him bothering you forever.

Here's the sunny side for you OP. It feels incredible the first guy you get to enjoy without any guilt.

Good luck. Oh, don't move in with the next guy, thats stupid.

>Who hurt you?
a woman who cheated on him, you fucking imbecile

Breaking up is one thing, are you prepared on what to do after? (Where will you stay? Etc., etc..)

I was in the same boat as you until last night. Just have to do it, I know it's hard but you'll learn to take things slower next time, and he'll find someone better for him. Try and accomodate anything he wants like being friends and talking.

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Thank you, this is what I'll do. How do I act towards him until I can move out? We have been having meals together, but other than that I have been trying to avoid him and he knows that.

>Good luck. Oh, don't move in with the next guy, thats stupid.
I wasn't planning to, but why is this bad?

Thank you. How did you manage to break up while still being friends? I quite feel like I need to cut off contact because he really wants to stay in the relationship.

Weeaboo wanted a japanese visa, try her luck and was successful, now she want to dump his boyfriend... but she wants advice?... I'm missing something?

Have a temporary place you can escape to for a couple of days if it becomes too uncomfortable before you move otherwise don't act mean or like a gf though you can continue to be civil.

Duh, if you didn't live with this one you would be gone already. I'm not saying don't live with a guy but make sure you are IN LOVE with him and he you and you have BIG plans together for the future instead of out of convenience.

>I quite feel like I need to cut off contact
you better cut contact or he will have hope and you don't want to do that to him now. Better you go on with your life and he will find a girl that loves him back.

it’s not good but it doesn’t deserve death.