How do I stop being afraid of women? I am scared of women, I can admit it now. When I walk down the street, I flinch when I see a woman and we make eye contact. I get very nervous when I have to walk past women. The effect is lesser if they are old or unattractive, but it's still there, compared to men, who don't phase me much at all. On a bad day, I still have some anxiety around males, but it's nowhere near the same as with women.
I was always bad with girls throughout my life, but it really only has started really hurting me a few months ago, since I wanted to start actively dating. Obviously it's very hard to meet, let alone attract women like this.
I was (a little bit) abused when I was like 4 years old by a kindergarten teacher. It wasn't super terrible, but I think it might be part of my issues, if that helps. My earliest childhood memory ever, is my mom walking out of the room, leaving me in my crib, then I start crying and the memory ends. My dad showed his dick to me once when I was like 3, but I think to remember that it was more of an educational thing, explaining and all that. Also, I saw my mom naked in the tub once when I was very young, I only remember me and my bro staring and my mom acting like it wasn't a big deal. Also, I am pretty sure I got my first boner while in the bathtub with my younger sister, pretty sure we played around with our genitalia in a childlike way, since we didn't understand what the deal was obviously. I was maybe 4 at this point.
Don't know if any of this is relevant, just thinking of fucked up childhood shit off the top of my head. I may be missing some traumas or some shit, but I think this is more or less the worst of it. Not very bad, compared to what happens to some people, I know. I can't afford a shrink, would you say I need one or is this all more or less insignificant shit?
Honestly, you sound like you're very self-conscious about something and to me it seems you feel like girls see this and you can't get over it. If that's the case, you need to work on overcoming that.
Jace Allen
When I was 4 a female kindergarten teacher saw that my pajamas had a button up hole for peeing and picked me up and told me she was going to catch my willy.
BOO haha jk The abuse portion and the crying out method your mom might have used could have done some damage. But you're here now, dealing with an intense fear. And right now it's up to you to try to derationalize your exaggerated fear with some desensitization therapy, grab a book on Cognitive Behavioral Therapy and follow yourself through a regular encounter with say one random plain/average looking woman, then work yourself up to where you can handle looking at strippers or going on a date.
>I’m anxious around girls >I guess I have a childhood trauma God this generation is pathetic. What difference does anything that happened in your childhood make? You still have to overcome this fear, trauma or not. You’re just another 20-something insecure boy who played too many video games and lived a sheltered life. Either join the ranks of the millions of incels around here or do something to change that.
Michael Phillips
You wanna help me practice bby? ; )
Andrew Martin
I guess I could chat.
Ryder Ross
Tell me girl, what's the one thing that's missing in your life?
Aaron Howard
Haven't had cake lately, might change that.
Michael Baker
I don't feel like you're taking this very seriously
Jaxson Wilson
Birds!
Nathaniel Cruz
How about you ask what you genuinely want to ask instead of using euphemisms, hm?
Owen Hughes
Euphemism? That's your interpretation. I feel like the best way to get to know someone is by talking about their desires and pains. Those are the things that shape us the most.
I gotta say, your interpretation is pretty shallow and cynical.
Cooper Edwards
Haha, wow, yeah dude, I can see why you have problems with girls
Carson Myers
>how does stuff that happens during the years where your personality forms affect your personality??? >god damn millenials just... kill yourself.
Oliver Sanchez
Here’s something for you to ponder on: bad things happen to everybody, even charismatic and confident people. The difference is, while some obsess about all the things that went wrong in their childhood and use it as an excuse to not be their best, others focus on the now. The fact that you know exactly what happened in your childhood means that you’re fully in control of what happens now, so quit being a bitch
Wyatt Garcia
Yeah and genes aren't a factor at all for how you respond to things.
Julian Wood
Nah, you just assume wrong that I am going to give up more valuable portions of my identity in casual conversation. I can only speak vague.
Levi Bell
Of course, now we’ve come to genes, the millennials favorite excuse. Never heard of a gene that makes you a whiny little bitch though.
Joseph Morgan
I'm really lost here, what the hell are you talking about? Do you feel like you have something to protect? On an anonymous imageboard?
Brayden Bennett
By the way, I used to be anxious and afraid of stuff too, sometimes walking around ready to burst into tears for no reason. That’s not the case anymore. But I guess it’s just that the “genes” went away...
James Campbell
Holy shit it's just a woman. You are seriously overvaluing them. They can be just as gross and nasty as men. Like yeah they're fun because you can have sex with them but holy fucking fuck they are not worth the anxiety you're putting yourself through. Not at all.
Chase Wilson
was pretty much the same. except for the torture porn your parents and sister did to you. i started going to the gym. i started off doing the 'hey' head nod to some of the regular girls. then i 'bravely' did the 'are you almost done with X machine or are you using those weights'. i really wanted to go to cons. cosplay,etc. by the second con i remember certain cosplay girls and started saying 'good to see you'. remember to smile. a genuine smile. practice in the mirror. you'd be surprised how many girls drop their guard on just having a 'good' smile.
Lincoln Bailey
or maybe you went to a therapist you faggot. just leave the thread, none of this is helpful, you are just some entitled basement dweller who thinks he has figured shit out. >muh millenials I bet you are like 30 and think you are hot shit now.
Jaxon Sanchez
and what happened next? that's not much of a conclusion, is it? how many years did it take you to say basic stuff to random women?
Hunter Ortiz
Idk. I just stopped desiring them. Their bodies still get me hard, but I just don't see the point in it anymore, If I ever did in the first place. I don't hate them, either. My standards for everyone, especially myself, are pretty high and simply put most women don't meet my standards or are (rightly) uninterested in me. I'm convinced there are more important or fulfilling things in life than women, although I would like kids at some point. Oh well. Just stop wanting them, and fear will go away
Carter White
Hey, how's it going
James Ross
I feel like I'm with OP, but...
Why can I overcome myself to sniff a prostitites asshole, let her give me a footjob, fuck her brains out and cum on her back, but not give a simple greeting to a woman on the streets?
Luis Wood
What are we doing?
Chase Martin
Because you've paid that woman to not reject you. Normal women still have that power over you and it terrifies you.
John Jackson
Turning Jow Forums into /soc/ homie
Eli Turner
I did not. I basically did what said and eventually started feeling like a chad. I’m sorry, did you make this thread for people to feel sorry for you? A therapist isn’t going to solve your problems, their job is to figure out what’s wrong. You’ve already done that, now what’s left is to actually fix that.
Juan Clark
Yep, my still mostly anonymous image.
Austin Roberts
Hey, babe forget that loser and get with a real winner like me. I own a suit.
