>be constantly funny and entertaining >Be sexual, but not TOO sexual >Be genuinely interested in her even though she expresses no interest in you or actively shows disdain through "shit tests" >Don't ever pressure her, show jealousy, insecurity, weakness, anger, bitterness, or contempt >But also be honest >Ask her out at just the right time because if you wait too long you'll miss your window >Don't ever send the wrong text or she'll immediately stop responding
What is this insanity? Trying to get and maintain a girls interest is more precarious than open heart surgery. It shouldn't be this hard, should it?
In some sense it really shouldn't be that hard. I've not had to dance on the head of a pin like that to get with plenty of women. Be critical of your choices and have some patience.
On the other hand, you can tone down the absolutism hanging over those points and end up with a simple standard: be good. No one is perfectly entertaining but it's a good thing to be pleasant company for the most part. You don't have to mind-read but tasteful sexuality is a nice quality to have. I'm sure you'd say the same of the women, too. So on and so forth. It's not a Herculean effort to just be a pretty damn good person. It should seem fair, I think, that you have to be pretty damn good if you expect a pretty damn good match as well.
Aiden Davis
It is though. I've talked to plenty of guys facing the same struggles and I'll take our combined experience over some random disrespectful faggot.
Jack Rodriguez
Just ask her out and if she says no then move on to the next one
1000 Monkeys on typewriters will eventually write Shakespear
Luke Turner
Being "good" doesn't arouse desire. You have to be playful and sexual but the amount that any girl is willing to accept varies wildly. It feels like walking a tightrope.
I get what you're saying but it annoys me that i need to constantly perform while women just sit back and judge. They haven't done anything to be afforded this privileged position except to be born with a uterus.
Tyler Perez
I don't mean "good" as in the opposite of "evil." I mean it in terms of being an example of positive qualities. So what about variation in what a given girl might enjoy regarding playfulness and sexuality? Joining those two "good" qualities are tastefulness, self-control and empathy, all of which you can use as an ensemble to express yourself in a way that any particular girl might enjoy. And hey, big picture: if you're uncomfortable with how you have to act for one particular girl, move on. Like you said, the next one is sure to have different preferences perhaps more aligned with your own.
In a very soft sense of the word "need," you need to be a good example of a person in life. That's true outside of relationships with women, too. If you were the gayest gay in the world I'd still offer that same general advice. Get good. It's a waste to not reach your human potential if for no other reason than simply getting to enjoy the pride of it.
Jackson Ramirez
>Be genuinely interested in her even though she expresses no interest in you or actively shows disdain through "shit tests"
That's the red flag right there OP. That was the warning that you would just be better off by yourself than you would be with her.
Ian Collins
>talked to a thousand guys who are struggling because they have no idea wtf they’re doing >uses combined knowledge of not doing things right to have a list of a bunch of different things that may or may not work with a bunch of different girls to who, none of those things may apply to because girls are not a single hive mind
Riiiight...
Do you understand the failure in logic there?
You’re overthinking shit.
As long as you can get a point where you can find yourself interesting (this is key), It either works or it doesn’t. They either find you interesting and you find them interesting, or you don’t.
Brandon Hill
I engage in self development constantly for its own sake. In interpersonal relationships, career, health, personal satisfaction etc. Everything has gone up, but my success with women hasn't changed at all. It sometimes feels like I had more success trying to be a "player" than a genuinely good guy.
I know, I know.. "don't focus on women so much and they'll come!" But it's fucking hard, and they're not coming.
Lots of girls shit test even with guys they're interested in. It annoys me that this is considered permissible behavior.
There's no failure in logic. If lots of guys are having trouble, then it's a difficult process.
Grayson Bennett
>It annoys me that this is considered permissible behavior.
Its permissible, because you allow it to be. The women I've dated never did that shit. Its a genuine character flaw. It doesn't just magically go away forever. Not to mention how boring those women seem.
Adrian Clark
The women I date don't do it either, im just talking about the initial stages of attraction.
Ethan Cook
What you should do is learn the basics of pick up on YouTube But also not overthinking this whole thing - i know it's contraditory, but once you force yourslef to get some pratice it kinda gets into you naturally
Also, don't be their dancing monkey, you stupid faggot
Camden Hill
>actively shows disdain through "shit tests"
Lots of girls shit test even with guys they're interested in.
Girls ONLY shit test guys they're interested in, user
Nolan Bailey
>Don't be their dancing monkey
Feels like I have to on dating apps? Like it's hard to "play it cool" when they're getting hit up by 20 guys an hour and don't give a shit about responding to you. You have to be polarizing to hold their attention.
I guess the answer to that is "don't use dating apps" which is fair, but also inconvenient.
True. They only do it if they're unsure. If youre extremely eligible, or not eligible at all, they won't.
Sebastian King
>There's no failure in logic. If lots of guys are having trouble, then it's a difficult process
No... that’s not how that works...
If 1,000,000 guys are having problems, that might be a lot of guys having trouble
But if there are 2,999,000,000, other guys having a perfectly ok time about it, guess what, that 1 million then becomes less than 1% of the normal case. Fuck even if it’s 100 million, thats still a pretty negligible 10%. Just because “a lot” of those guys are having problems, it does not mean it’s representative of the situations of the other 90%.
You’re falling in to the fallacy of believing the world and it’s functions revolve around you and your personal experience, or that at least your limitedexperiences and what you see around you are indicative of what the entire world must be (a Plato’s cave situation )
Your also completely discounting the fact that there is an equal and opposite side to this scenario where women have their own troubles too and that they might be more diverse than your giving them credit for or are seeing.
Joseph Cook
Go to any site on the internet, or ask any average looking dude on the street, if they find it very easy to attract women.
You know that many guys are having difficulties , doubly so since you spend time on this website, so why are you typing out all this bullshit? Is it just so that random anonymous people will think (you) are a pimp? Honestly, what are you doing?
Christian Sullivan
>Tinder Oof, i've been there, gtfo. This shit really cripples the average man self esteem
Nolan Fisher
Sorry, i haven't picked up that you were talking about text game (low iq here)
In reality, text game is fucking broken, even outside of dating apps, it feels like there's lots of room to fuck up but barely any to raise your value and build attraction.
Imo just keep your text game to the bare minimum, i have fucked up in text with girls wich i was being sucessfull in person.
Jacob Rivera
Yea you're right. I think it's probably better to just do cold approach in public places, skip all the bullshit text game and have your first face to face encounter immediately, but then it's like, "oh are they going to think I'm weird for approaching strangers in public" etc.
Idk, I'm just frustrated. It feels like no matter how much I learn, nothing is actually getting better.
Anthony Hall
You remind me a lot of myself
Depending of where you do it it's not weird. But It is weird if you're somewhere only with the specific intent of approaching women
You don't need to make an apporach into a date immediatly, just chat a little and get the number so you can make it into a date any other day
Tbh dating/pick up feels really boring when you're working on other aspects of your life, and that's the way to grow out of your frustration
You don't really crave sex What you crave is the validation of someone being willing to have sex with you It sure feels good, but after the physical pleasure is over all that stays is the little bump in self esteem
There are other things that give you more meaningfull and endurig long term results
Jackson Ramirez
I challenge you to do exactly the same.
I KNOW a lot of people are having difficulties attracting others, I was even one of them at one point, but I also know that there are a lot who are not (I also became one of them at one point).
But on top of that, I also know that dating is hard for pretty much EVERYONE. It’s supposed to be. You’re trying to find the 1 out of 10,000+ people that matches you in mental wave length. That’s hard as fuck to do with just finding friends, let alone someone you’re sexually attracted to.
Honestly, what are *you* doing? You’re just whining here to whine user.
I’m just calling you out on what I see as self pitying bullshit.
That shit fix’s nothing. Living in negativity only further breeds negativity.
Oliver Lewis
I'm assuming your talking about 18 to 22 year old women because theres 0 hope for romance with them.
Joshua Gray
ok but Benis in bagina
Kevin Williams
Not him, but I have some female friends of my age who look pretty average and have their own personal issues
And basically there's never a time when they are not dating or casually hooking up with someone as long as they're willing to
The only girls i see having a hard time in dating are the ones who have some sort of parental or religious obstructions
Parker Hill
The advice about "forget women and just work on urself bro" is weird to me because even in working on myself, I'm ultimately trying to attract women, have a family, etc. Is this some kind of fatal flaw? Do I really need to just conpletely stop caring about attracting women? Isn't that our biological imperative?
If you read the thread I think it's clear that I'm not being negative just for the sake of it. There's discussion happening. On your part it seems like an ego thing. "Look at these dumbasses having troubles with women meanwhile I'm wildly successful".
Even 30 year old women are pretty haughty these days. But probably it goes back again to the shittiness of dating apps and women getting massive egos from social media in general.
Blake Wright
You don't have to try that hard. If they like you, they like you.
Colton Ortiz
>you acknowledged the shitty condition of gender relations once therefore ALL you've ever done is complain lmao why are you so negative
You're a woman and you're using shaming tactics because what he said made you feel slightly less than wonderful.
Aiden King
You only have to be that perfect if you're average looking and poor. If you're physically attractive or rich you can do whatever you want and they'll accept it.
Ryan Jenkins
What if nobody likes me user?
Please help, i just want to be cared for..
David Perry
that is your animal imperative. what is your soul's imperative? women are attracted to kings. good kings are a different breed than bad kings. do you think a good king is "ultimately trying to attract women?" and I mean a "King" in the archetypal sense of the word. A True King, the ultimate Alpha, a leader.
Christopher Morris
I've been reading a lot about archetypes lately so this really hits home for me. Thanks user.
>Tfw you're the archetype of the magician and girls only like warriors and Kings
Define '''good'''. I believe I'm plenty good but still no success with women. I'm soft-spoken, kind, intelligent, good looking and have an engineering degree, but still no success.
What OP is telling has truth in it.
Mason Cooper
bamp
Christopher Jenkins
Yeah all this shit hits too close to home. It would be easier to accept if I was a classical loser. These threads always go in circles.
You're not what women want work to improve yourself but don't treat it like a check list but don't have x y z flaws either well if you still failed you're just entitled
Samuel Cox
Perhaps you should stop chasing girls who aren't interested in you or aren't worth being chased, and spend your time looking for women who aren't crazy. I know that's hard enough for you considering you don't talk to very many women at all, but it's really just a numbers game (once you actually get out of your basement and start looking for numbers, that is.)
Ian Johnson
No offense user, but the intricate nuances you're describing and complaining tend to come naturally for non-autistics.
