ITT: Ask the opposite sex anything

>What do girls/guys think about ?
>Do like ?
There is no one answer. Preferences differ, but complexes are always a turn-off.

ok :(

reposting because I feel bad and I don't care and want to cry about it

>qt messages me on some website
>we get along great and talk about everything
>literally perfect
>falling for qt
>she's in fucking Iran
>she likely has absolutely no desire for a relationship, let alone an LDR, I asked, she's never had a bf
>she doesn't yet believe me that I'm falling for her, she doesn't get how that could possibly happen in such a short time of talking (we've been chatting and calling a lot in the last month)
>earliest she will be able to emigrate is two years and even then might not come to my country
yea gee way to go user, why avoid a chance to feel like shit when you can find the perfect candidate for something that will never happen and make yourself feel like you're going to die alone fucking dandy it's all just great

it's a dumb idea to insist that I do actually like her a lot, she said that usually when that happens things just start going south if it's one way (she's gotten this from other people on the internet, she didn't realize, they lost touch quite quick, apparently we get along a lot better and we even made a song together)
so I can for whatever reason make her understand that I do have feels for her, and then it'll probably start fizzling out
or just let it run like this and slowly start feeling like shit by myself until it eventually dies anyway
wow what a plethora of great choices I have

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Girls:

This is not a question. It is a public service announcement for all women:
When you are walking with a man and something attacks/startles you, DO NOT, I repeat
>DO
>NOT
grab your man's arm!
>do not grab your man's arm
>do not hug him
>do not speak to, distract, or even TOUCH your man
Grabbing, restraining, weighing down, or even distracting your man will open him up to attack.
You are already a liability. A man walking alone is statistically better off than a couple in terms of targeting by muggers. Do NOT get your boyfriend, your husband, youe brother, or your friend killed because you were scared and wanted physical comfort like a goddamned infant.
DO run away. DO get behind him without touching him. DO pull out a weapon or a phone. DO help him fight. DO get help. DO use him as a wall between you and the attacker.
DO not hold his dominant arm in a fucking lock while the crackhead stabs him.
In summary, either run away and leave us to fight without you hilding us back, or fight alongside us. 2 options. Nothing else is acceptable.

Going forward, all females, and all males being bodyguarded, will follow the above protocol. Thank you for your time and your cooperation.
-Men

Kek

I have a crush on a girl at my school I see kind of often but don't know very well. While I'm working on not being afraid to talk to her, when I do talk to her, there's not much that I say beyond school stuff, and our conversations last like ten seconds. How do I increase the length of our conversations and get to talk to her more?

Based but bluepilled

If I did this two years ago, my then partner would have been hospitalised or worse. Stop talking in broad strokes to increase your self importance. Some men are not fighters and that's okay - expecting them to be fighters is just going to fuck everything up.

PSA: Have a game plan with your partner (or brother or male friend) in case an event like this goes down. It's important to know what you both reasonably believe you can do in a high pressure environment and be honest about it.

Being 18 helps.

How do you get over commitment phobia? I could stay with this dude forever if I took it one day at a time, but anytime he starts speaking about an activity we're going to do in the future my brain just shuts down and starts panicking, like I'm not sure if I want to agree because I don't know if we're gonna be together. What the fuck is wrong with me??

Did I say to push men who are not fighters into a fight? No. Did I say to escalate fistfights into murders? No. Did I say to start fights at all? No.
Simply do not physically restrain somebody who you are expecting to protect you. That's it, and it's not negotiable.
In no scenario is 110 pounds of maidenly alarm holding your arms at your sides an advantage, and in no scenario is not physically restraining somebody under attack going to get anybody hospitalized. Never has anybody thought, "Gee, I'm sure glad I couldn't use either of my arms back there."
I agree, have a game plan so you're not just flailing in any given emergency. Part of that game plan includes not actively sabotaging your partner.

Femanons, how do you know when you like sex?

>DO run away.
Hospitalised
>DO get behind him without touching him.
Hospitalised
>DO pull out a weapon or a phone. DO help him fight. DO get help.
This is all reasonable
>DO use him as a wall between you and the attacker
Hospitalised or fucking dead.

I don't mind you saying "don't grab your partner's arm", just don't act like that's the only thing you said. All of that shit I quoted is gonna get some uppity wanna be alpha stabbed and his partner traumatised.

The same way dudes do, it feels good and you anticipate having it.

As the other user said, when it feels good and i want more of that. Happens almost never desu. Men are just useless when it comes to female sexuality.

I'm 22.

Whilst I'd usually agree, I'm starting to realise they've been socialised to not know and not care. If you find one who is actually willing to think for himself and if you're willing to communicate, you get to be excited every day, which is nice.

Obviously don't just bolt out of nowhere ans escalate a tense situation. Obviously exercise judgement. Obviously not every one of the above options is acceptable in every scenario.
But never restrain the arms. That is never an option. That never helps. That is how you cause car wrecks, and it is how the rabid dog rips your throat out. Speaking from experience. And yes, using me as a meatshield is still smarter than disabling me with no benefit to yourself.
As for alpha wannabes, STILL don't physically restrain. Referees get socked, too.

Again, no issues with the "do not restrain arms", my problem is with the flawed advice that I called you out on. You're obviously speaking from a personal experience, yes, but that doesn't mean you get to throw out bad advice and get someone potentially hurt because your ego is bruised.

Using someone as a meat shield makes them the only target. If they are unable to defend themselves, you've basically signed their death if there's a blade in the mix. Again, my then partner's blood would've been on my hands if I had read your advice and followed it the way you laid it out. Stop talking in broad strokes.

How early is too early to tell a girl she's pretty or that you find her attractive?

Never, so long as it is contextual. Don't just mouth breathe over to spoke cutie and go "you look nice" but "you look really good in that top" works, or if people are contextual talking about looks (via make up, clothes, physical fitness, age, etc) then so long as it fits naturally in the flow of conversation that's fine too.

Some advice; there's a chance she's heard every generic compliment before. Try to make sure yours is specific to her and it will have a much bigger effect.

>not using your thot as a human shield

It's not about ego, so quit it with the psychoanalytical crap. You see a post, you make a snap judgement, you instantly make it personal, and then you try to shoehorn in Sigmund Freud and confirm your biases and have the last word against an internet tough guy. Eventually everything is about ego and dick size. Screw off.
Yes, you would have gotten your partner injured or killed had you used him as a meatshield. Duh. That is still inarguably smarter than getting him killed with zero benefit. Obviously don't get people killed, but, devil's advocate here, getting them killed selfishly is still less stupid than getting both of you killed. And in no scenario is losing the use of one or both arms helpful. Which you've admitted.
Now, since you're so above ego and we're in agreement on having a plan and two arms, you won't need to weasel your way into misrepresenting something and having the last word.

ladies please help me
this girl - i guess she's my gf now - will NOT stop texting me
we text all day every day
it's wearing me out
how do i tell her to chill out without being a dickhead

bonus: she has a long term bf and a kid with him so she's cheating big time but i don't care because she's smart and based and cute and i want her for myself

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>i guess she's my gf now
If you haven't had the "we're bf and gf now" talk, she's not your gf.

It is about ego because you refuse to accept you could be partially wrong and keep going back to points I've said I actually agree with because you can't argue against the points that I don't.
>ego and dick size
I'm not even touching this or your baseless lash outs.

>That is still inarguably smarter than getting him killed with zero benefit
These are not the only two options and you've literally set up a false dichotomy. Yes, one person dying is better than two, but the option of no one dying because they're not following terrible advice cookie cut to one type of person is far better imho. Your advice in the first comment is poor and I genuinely hope no woman follows it, aside from "don't restrain him".

She's not your girlfriend, dude. But just tell her, communication is key. Fyi, if they cheat with you, they'll cheat on you.

Kek. Not that I entirely agree with the condensending tone, but as an add on to this

When your in a car and your boyfriend/husband/whoever is driving DO. OT, I repeat
>DO
>NOT
Scream for absolute no good reason
>Do not scream because you saw a cute puppy
>Do not yell OMIGOD because you saw pumpkinspice lattes are now back on sale
>Do not shout OHFUCK! because you were browsing on your phone and read a Trump headline
Shouting, screaming, or yelling distracts your man from the road, making him believe that he may need to take immediate evasive maneuvers, and may actually cause momentary lapses of judgment that cause him to send a 8,000 pound vehicle to veer uncontrollably, causing potentially fatal damage to you or other innocent bystanders.

DO calmly say, “oh... shoot...”
DO feel free to burst out with a , “yessss!”
DO happily cheer.

Do NOT make noises like someone is just about to get deaded. Unless you want that person to be you and your boyfriend after you cause him to drive headlong in to a pole.

Thank you for your time and cooperation
-From one boyfriend who is afraid he’s either going to slip up and kill us all one of these times, or have a “boy who cried wolf” moment another and accident ignore a shriek I shouldn’t have .

Now this I whole heartedly agree with.

>want to relive youth
>attracted to innocence and need to protect it
>you look old

Sex with my adopted brother.

Parents couldn't get pregnant, they decided to adopt, and as they signed the final papers, they found out my mother was pregnant anyway. So there is 7 months between us, and we have always been around each other. It has been kinda weird ever since.

>I'm not evsn gonna touch the part where I get nailed to a T
Big surprise.
>baseless
Literally just explaining step-by-step what you did. That's not half as baseless as psychoanalyzing somebody based off a Jow Forums post. Unless doing so is valid, in which case none of what I said was baseless.
>can't argue the points I disagree with
I already did argue them and it went straight over your head.
1. If you honestly think I meant to do every one of those things in every scenario, you're hopeless. Those are all possible options depending on exercising judgement.
2. You never actually refuted the devil's advocate with your false dichotomy strawman. No dichotomy was set up at all.
3. The broadest possible stroke "Never grab the arms," remains.
If you want to make more nebulous allusions to a specific incident in which one possible option would've been bad, project your feelings about alpha jackasses onto somewhere inapplicable, bust out psych 101 on me again, or appeal to muh fellow women, anything, ANYTHING to claim victory here, be my guest.

I legit always look forward to it, but whether I enjoy it or not depends more on whether the guy cares or not. If he is useless, it wont be good.

It's kinda why the "starfish" girls exist. If he is terrible and wont actually put in effort to pleasure us, and just wants to smash away, then he should not expect the girl to put in effort either.

And no, no matter what your porn or hentai told you, your dick will never make a girl magically explode into the best orgasm of her life. You have hands and a good tongue, use them.

lol who even initiated that? you or him?

>girls who do shitty thing exist because men do shitty thing

thought about? I'm upper 20s now but I sometimes fantasize about being with teens. it's the idea of taking their virginity. it's weird and in reality I'm not attracted to them, they look like little aiblings to me.

done? Me and my ex were seeing a movie in theaters middle of the day. it was so cheesy so we whispered funny shit about it to each other to pass the time but then somehow we started touching each other under our clothes. I kept rubbing his junk and then he had trouble closing his zipper again, and he also sucked on my tits. Thing is, even if it was dark there were literally people behind us and they didn't switch seats so I have to assume they didn't notice or enjoyed watching us. Still not sure. It was super hot but I'm actually really against people doing stuff in public places around other people.

One more tame one, another ex had a private office and I made out a little in his office and once he did a little in the stairway which I was like dude seriously?

>Some advice; there's a chance she's heard every generic compliment before. Try to make sure yours is specific to her and it will have a much bigger effect.
Yeah, we had an user with two creative ones a few days ago. Something about wanting her in a glass case, and wanting a ln anatomical copy or her head. That will work!

Generic and common compliments works, because most girls hear them anywhere near as much as most guys think. Just recently, I was taking to 7 other coworkers, all single, and all alright (from 6 to 8/10), and only a single one could recall being called pretty or any other such compliment over the last 2 years. And that was by what seemed to be a homeless guy Catcalling her on the street. You may have said "that top looks good on you!" 20 different girls, but none of them are likely to have heard it before.

Unless they are massive thots, of course. But then you need a way more sexual remark anyway.

i'm a hot 30yo and you can have my virginity
do you live in the new england area? are you a vile thot?

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>Literally just explaining step-by-step what you did
No, you told me what other people do because I mentioned your ego and tried to rope me into it despite not having done those things. No, your arguments against my points were "don't do them all the time, use your brain", which isn't an actual response as you're shifting the blame away from your poor advice to people not using it correctly. I don't have to argue against a devils advocate, I argue against the points - which I did, saying that it's not this or that, there are other options that are superior to the ones you've given. Yeah, I don't know if I'd consider "don't restrain your partner" even vaguely a broad point, s'kinda why I've only really agreed with that.
>claim victory here, be my guest.
What? Victory? I want to make sure no one ends up getting stabbed because they're not aware that this is poor advice. If you see debates on the internet as a way to be "victorious" that's fine, but don't rope me into it.

>30yo virgin
>Hot

Kinda both... mostly me.

Bored out of our minds on a "vacation" with our parents, which was actually a business trip my dad was on. Mom went with him, and we were stuck in a hotel with very little to do, because they didn't want us roaming the streets alone at that age, in that country (Prague, age 17)

Happened a few more times where we switched between who initiated, before we kinda just stopped. It never quite got back to normal despite that.

i have a severe fear of relationships and intimacy because i was neglected abandoned and abused/molested when i was a kid but it's time for me to overcome that

Oh loosen up. Uptight people like you is the reason why being offensive is both fun and necessary. I wouldn't be surprised if the guys were having fun watching you get offended, though it's just as likely that you're making a mountain out of a molehill because you're stuck up.

>I get
>or what ever

You aren't getting squat. A friend is someone who will be honest with you and call you an idiot when you're an idiot, not someone who will "you go girl" you as you're driving off a cliff. Guys teasing their mates is a way to give eachother feedback in a humourous manner, it isn't done behind eachother's back, and it stays among people who know the individual and his situation.

>Making fun of people and how they look.

You mean like how humanity has been doing for centuries? Fools and freakshows used to be a thing you know. When someone dresses like a clown, people are going to treat him or her like a clown.

>Being shallow and rating and objectifying girls

You mean they were forming opinions about the people around them based on the available data. Nobody is a psychic. Men and women alike make judgements based on looks. Nobody is living inside your head to know you tastes, beliefs and morals. They see your shell. Fashion is the product of our human nature to form opinions based on looks.
The only people complaining about objectification are the uglies who can't compete with their peers and want to drag them down.

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Something about being a virgin at that age doesn't do it for me but if you were rather innocent maybe. But actually it's just fantasy, I do it because I can't masturbate to the guy I really love without being super emotional. I don't really desire sleeping around, and I'm not into kinky shit.

PS I used to live in new england, that's all you'll be able to get from me, this knowledge

Not to say the other way can't happen as well, but more often than not, when a guy asks why his girl is playing dead in bed, it's because he refuses to give oral (so probably gay), and thinks his dick is better than his fingers at giving her pleasure.

>it's time for me to overcome that
It's been 12 years since it was time for you to overcome that

i look like i'm 18 lol

That's a very extreme example. How about "that colour looks really good on you" or "I love the way you've styled your hair today". Relevant to her, not "let me keep your head in a glass case" and and generic enough that you'll be able to actually remember it. As a chick, you're right that we don't get complimented anywhere near the level that Hollywood would have you believe, but I can tell you that some of us have definitely heard the same thing several times and it really does affect things.

Look, I'm not gonna read this and just level with you. I had a bad day and I'm honestly just being a douche on Jow Forums to take out some of that bile. If it wasn't you it would've been some rando on the street. You're arguing with somebody who realistically probably agrees with you and just wants to larp and abuse people for an hour on the internet.
I thought I was invested enough in this to keep hurling/taking abuse for longer than this, but I just got high and now I'm not.

Well then I'm genuinely sorry you've had a bad day and I hope it improves for you. Enjoy your high user.

>but I can tell you that some of us have definitely heard the same thing several times and it really does affect things.
Maybe this is just me, but hearing the same thing helps me believe it. And often times it matters much more how it is said, rather than what is being said. But then, I dont get a lot of comments like that, so that probably doesn't help.

A "You look good today" can sound anywhere from creepy, to snarky and ironic, to a general compliment, or a flattering remark that will make me blush.

i was raped bro
and not just by one person but by a group

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>two male coworkers both began flirting with me
>I know they are good friends
>I am sure at least one of them has seen the other try to flirt with me
>a company party is coming up, and despite not needing anything resembling a partner for the party, both sent me a request asking if I would go with them.
>One at exactly 9:55:34, and one at 9:55:36, which hardly seems like a coincidence
What exactly is the game here? I feel like I am being made fun of, and I have no idea how to deal with this. This is the first time a guy was gone out of his way to ask me out, and done anything more than casual flirting. I can't figure out what their goal is here, because this seems like some elaborate joke. It hurts a bit, because I would not mind either of them (fantasy even says both), but I just feel like this is some evil prank, and I have no idea how to tell.

Do I just ignore them as much as possible? I dont work with them as such, and only interact with them because they targeted me like this, otherwise we would never really meet at all.

Aye, definitely how it was said. I think context for the compliment is the most important thing - you can say the same thing catcalling or flirting in a private convo and the response would be vastly different. Also yeah the same dude repeating the same compliment is completely fine, I'm more talking about trying to get a chick's attention and not have her think you're a generic fuckboy, really.

Fuck, what a horrible situation. They're either playing a joke for amusement or they're legit competing for you and both situations end very poorly in a work situation. I'd honestly turn them both down and if they ask why, just say you don't date coworkers. If you explain the issue, its potential they'll spin you as paranoid to other co-workers.

yeah they're messing with you
contact HR

>go up my apartment stairs with a big rug for my living room
>dont see one of the tenants, a girl, come out of her apartment door, and accidentally poke her with the folded rug
>she laughs as I apologise, and tells me to poke her with something smaller next time, and not on the stairs, before she quickly skips past me and leaves the building
Wh... what does that mean? She seems like a borderline NEET who is always home (people always push her doorbell if they forgot their keys, literally home 95% of the time), but this is the first time she has ever made any suggestive comment like this.

Do you think that dating became far too competitive, to the detriment of society?

The whole rat race is a scam.

Sex, spooning and having a person to hug and go out with is really desirable though...

>sometimes fantasize about being with teens. it's the idea of taking their virginity.

Nice! I'd feed you my own sons.

What are you waiting for, a royal invitation? Go for it!

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I'd say the pressure to pursue a relationship in the uniform way had massively increased, but I don't know if I would argue that it's become "too competitive". I think perhaps people are looking at the past with rose coloured glasses in that regard.

I can’t really fathom two guys going out of their way to fuck with someone like that... I mean... maybe if they fucking hated you or something and had major beefs with you, but a random girl who has done nothing to them? That’s outside of the scope of effort most guys would be willing to expend on something like a random prank.

I’d be more inclined to think they’re competing or trying to one up one another.

Who knows tho, sometimes people are shittier than I like to believe. I stil feels the odds are heavily skewed in the competitive direction though.

Not the person you're responding to but I've had it happen to me before and when I was fuming about it to my friends they'd experienced it too. It's definitely not uncommon.

I am honestly not even sure why they suddenly started seeking me out like this. I dont interact with them normally which is why this took some time to really catch up to me. I wouldn't date a coworker I am working with, but I didnt even know who they were or where they worked, before they introduced themselves. It is such a weird situation.

Turning them down is probably the easiest one but... it kinda hurts to know the first real interest anyone has ever had in me, was by guys who did it to mess with me.

>contact HR
Eh, over flirting? I'm not quite sure what to tell HR here. It was mutual until I started to feel something was off. There are no rules against dating coworkers, either, so they haven't done anything wrong that I would reasonable to able to pin them for over this.

But competition wouldn't exactly be good for me either, would it...? I can't help but feel this would likely end up in quite a lot of drama no matter what happens, if I dont stop it before it begins. Would guys, especially 2 friends, really just accept that one of them "won", and then all would be good? I can't imagine how that would ever work. I dont think I could ever be friends with a girl who went for the same guy as myself, and then took him from me.

>She seems like a borderline NEET who is always home (people always push her doorbell if they forgot their keys, literally home 95% of the time), but this is the first time she has ever made any suggestive comment like this.
Probably very lonely, I'd imagine. Do you know if she ever have visitors?

Might be worth just asking her if she wants a cup of coffee next time you stumble into her. Socially isolated people tend to get weird when they try to interact with someone else, so this could just be an attempt at being funny.

>What are you waiting for, a royal invitation? Go for it!
She just seems so damn innocent, I can't quite wrap my head around this sudden comment.

I guess I might as well try to approach her then, but how? Like, what do I say after that? "Can I come in and poke you like you offered?"

>Probably very lonely, I'd imagine. Do you know if she ever have visitors?
Not to my knowledge. Usually see her because the delivery people tend to just hand everything to her, but she never seems to have anyone else come over to my knowledge. I live right across from her, so I generally hear it whenever she opens the door, because it creaks an awful lot.

>Might be worth just asking her if she wants a cup of coffee next time you stumble into her.
That sounds better than my own idea. But what if she doesn't drink coffee? I dont have a lot of variety on hot beverages.
>Socially isolated people tend to get weird when they try to interact with someone else, so this could just be an attempt at being funny
Oh... so there is a chance she didn't mean it?

this girl keeps telling me how unhappy she is with her bf
what does this mean?

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she give me 2 clear signs but I overthink and don't take it

we have very large age gap, I don't want this to be 1 time thing
I prefer that we hang out as friends from time to time

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She's unhappy with her bf.

Experiences with a guy dating an older woman? 25yo guy here and there’s this 28yo girl who has a crush on me. It’s not that bad of an age difference but idk how to feel about it. The main thing is she’s a bit older and for some reason um always thinking about them hitting the wall when their around this age.

Am I over thinking this?

hmmm, and?

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Point taken. That sucks. Sorry to hear people are shittier than I wanted to believe, and that you were a target of it.

>Would guys, especially 2 friends, really just accept that one of them "won", and then all would be good?

Depends on the guys really. Some guys would get butthurt from the get go. Some guys would treat it as a, there’s plenty of other fish in the sea situation.

I’m of the latter type, mostly because I know first hand that backing down can lead to drama anyway. I’ve also experienced the latter where there were no hard feelings.

What do you mean, "and"?

>It never quite got back to normal despite that.
YA DON'T SAY

i think you know mate
she wants me

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>Experiences with a guy dating an older woman?
>25 yo and 28yo
>Am I over thinking this?
Yes. Fuck off.

>raped
>virgin
begone troll

i'm a dude
when i was 13 three older girls held me down stripped me naked and molested me and then started calling me baby dick every time they saw me
i had to change schools

lmfao please go tell Jow Forums that baby dick

but i'm a normie
i'm not allowed there

>I guess I might as well try to approach her then, but how? Like, what do I say after that? "Can I come in and poke you like you offered?"
I'd advice you to just say "Hi I have autism" instead. Gets the point across much more cleay.

>But what if she doesn't drink coffee? I dont have a lot of variety on hot beverages.
Holy fuck user.

Just ask if she would like to share a cup of coffee, I get the feeling she probably knows what that means.

I'd tell her just that but I'm not sane or subtle. On second thought I'd invite her over to get poked ON the rug and then watch a movie together. Hell, I'd toss a few Duke Nukem quotes too for the fun of it.

As someone who just hit 30 an has been dating a girl a couple years older than for the last 4 years: You’re overthinking it.

If I’m honest, the “clock” is kinda ticking and I kind of get it, but I don’t feel like I’m too far off of being ready to settle down anyway and neither of us is really sure we’d want childbirth over adoption (especially with some of the shit that runs in our families)

I'm obese. Why is an anorexic, seriously underweight girl willingly dating me?

Because she effectively have the same issue as you do.

As someone who used to be anorexic, and still haven't been able to recover my weight, my personal view on it is that an obese guy is just as attractive (or unattractive I guess) as an anorexic. It is mostly down to personal taste.

Trust me here, being anorexic isn't seen as attractive by most people. I tried to go slut in a desperation move a year ago, and got 3 matches, 2 who lived in *a different country*, and someone who never actually responded.

Personally, I dont mind overweight as much anyway. They tend to at least have more energy, and be able to stay awake.

Are you me? This is frustrating as hell

To the girl who recommended I get a friend pic related for her birthday if she's still around!
Thanks a lot! she really liked it!
I got her the Venice one.

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>Usually see her because the delivery people tend to just hand everything to her
Order something silly to her, and have her receive it.

That would be a pretty fun way to start a conversation.
>oh this package? That's actually for you
Order coffee and ask if you can share a cup.