Why do men suck so completely and utterly in bed?

Then fucking talk to him. If he doesnt know the problem he won't change

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It sounds like you and those woman have mental issues. Sex isn't complicated. If he told you to do something and he did it than that's on you if you couldn't get into it.

It's a female thing. You don't have the ability to know what you want and you're never truly satisfied.

That image has actually changed how I think about everything, thank you

I don‘t know which part of „we have been working on this honestly and intensely for 4 years“ you fail to understand.

Read what you wrote again, slowly..

If every guy is bad at sex, nobody is good at sex. Or everybody is good at sex.

It is either women have something wrong with them or men. Ofcourse your conclusion is not there can a desynchronisation between the genders, "it must be the men who are faulty!".

Get a grip on reality..

Any part of it, since you're not getting into details. What's there to work on?

Oh, since men can't satisfy women, women must be impossible to satisfy? Laughs in lesbian.

Based

Well, you're probably right then, yet i don't know the aswer to your question

But if you can't turn yourself on enough nor him nor any men, How do you know what "amazing sex" feels like?

the problem is that these so called beta males are having sex. A good chance they are still just an ugly version of whatever you are imagining as the "alpha male"
the thing is that it isn't even considered, men who DON'T have personalities "on par with the jocks"
they are non entities.

This is 99% of men.
Far majority fucking suck at sex and relatipnships in general.
However I managed to fall in love eith the rare exception so reading this makes me feel so thankful.
I guess our kind and generous personalities, lack of porn obsession, and truly loving each other would be the reason.

I have had bad sex before, omfg.
I wish I could undo that shit.

>girl I gave head to

user, I think that's not a girl...

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Ah yes, sure. Here we go again. It‘s all the girls fault.
Believe me, i know EXACTLY what i need and want and i have told him very, VERY clearly.
But men are like animals once their cock is activated and all their brain functions go to shit, making them completely forget everything we have ever told them about how to make sex slightly more enjoable for a woman.
I don‘t deny that a lot of those girls (me included) have issues that make it harder to etablish a sane sexlife, but me not being 100% confident with my body doesn‘t nullifie that he can‘t even grasp the concept of how to tell if i‘m even AROUSED!

It's litterally the entire basis of civilization. Men do things to get woman, and woman ask for more. Woman are biologically driven to demand more from every situation, no matter how ideal.

I can turn myself on no problem. I can tell him exactly what turns me on. Yet he‘s so wound up in getting his cock wet the moment HE gets aroused that he completely forgets about everything i ever told him.
And i know how amazing sex could be because i‘ve had sex with ONE(1) girl before and it was like a fucking revelation.

Of duck off you entitled cunt. You married a retard who cant follow instructions and now it is the mens fault..

I don't ever want to have sex again. I imagine im not alone

>I wish I could undo that shit.
why didn't you listen to literally everyone except for the guy(s) who wanted to have sex with you and just not have sex?

>Believe me, i know EXACTLY what i need and want and i have told him very, VERY clearly

Tell us then, so that we know you're making a reasonable demand and actually access what he is or isn't doing to meet said demand.

Oh poke it up your hoop you entitled man child. Sometimes I'm so grateful I don't have to deal with men, this is one of those times.

You deal with men all the time. Like I said, civilization.

Ok, so a guy who‘s 24, fat as fuck, plays wow all day, is unemployed, is a fucking weeb who also jerks it to loli and trap porn, lives with his parents, has only had sex with prostitutes before (and claims he has made them cum LMFAO) is not your typical beta male just because he has managed to fuck a girl once?
What about the it guy who‘s lanky, has autism to an unreal extend, can‘t even muster up the courage to make his own doctors appointments at age 36, refuses to go on vacation or even to a restaurant because that makes him feel out of controle? That‘s clearly chad, right?

I‘ve had sex with other men and the issue is the same. Also, all other females i know report the same. I don‘t know, maybe every man is „the wrong one who can‘t even follow insturctions“?

You dont want an advice here, you want to have validation that you are right

It's clearly someone you can't stand because their time and money is being spent on something other than you.

True, I deal with them like I deal with children tho - at arms length and with mild amusement when they start temper tantruming until it gets boring. My boss is a woman so I really do have it good, I think. Jow Forums is the vast majority of interaction aside from public niceties.

"Self employed"

Are you illiterate or just really upset?

Let‘s make a very simple example here:
I told him that my clit and my nipples are still very sensitive when i‘m not aroused. That he can‘t go straight from „hugging you“ to „pinching your nipples and rubbing your clit like it‘s a wine stain on my new carpet“. Not so hard to understand, right? Most guys wouldn‘t enjoy me sneaking up on them from behind, jacking down their foreskin and then hardly press and rub my finger into their urethra without them even having an erection either.
Yet he still does exactly that EVERY.SINGLE.TIME.
He genuinely thinks that because he is aroused means i am aroused too. I told him that he could just ask me if i am aroused (since he‘s too autistic to tell on his own) or observe my reactions (like „wanting more“, pressing against his hand/his cock/him, heavier blood flow to genitals (which is noticeable, i‘ve checked), and many more). He doesn‘t do any of that ever.
So then he goes on pinching/pulling/rubbing my body like it‘s a machine without checking in on the outcome of his actions. I genuinely are FUCKIN FED UP with having to tell him, do nore of that, can you do this, yadda yadda, EVERY TIME since years. How dense can you be, really?

>Television
>Internet
>Music
>Advertisements
Everyone grows up getting sex pushed as some hot sexy act people perform for eachother, but for what exactly.
If momentary pleasure is what you're after, sex will be like drugs.
If you see it as a tool to, lets say, make children, sex will be something else.
Personally I think it's a matter of perspective, like pretty much everything else.
People do things for different reasons, and enjoy different things for even more different reasons.
Only the laws of nature will weed out what is the 'wrong' way to do it.
As for the question why men aren't good at sex, I think that's just untrue as much as females are bad at sex.
It's a sport, a skill, a game.

Ehrm, no?
One is my step dad and the other is the bf of a friend of mine. I‘m just making examples here. I do genuinely like both of those guys as persons but fuck me would i not want to be their sex partner. All the informations i have listed about them, i have either observed myself or their women have told me.

You're just sexually frustrated and that's so unnatractive.
Deal with it the way men have to deal with it. Alone.

>Why do women suck so completely and utterly in bed?
>Every single male that i know is not happy with their sex life. No matter if they just fuck whatever girl comes their way, if they are in a long term relationship or if they have been married for decades. EVERY. SINGLE.ONE. Is frustrated af because women lack basic empathy to tune in on a partner during sex. They just „deliver their performance“ and in turn expect you to fulfill their disney induced fantasies. Wtf, that‘s absolutely not how great sex happens.
>I‘ve tried very seriously to improve the sex life in my marriage for a few years now. My wife is certainly willing to make sex more enjoyable for me. But basically, her sole motivation is having sex with me as a chore so I don't leave for another woman. Yet despite our mutual efforts, sex is still nothing but shit.
>What gives? Why so incabaple?

Do you see the problem here

So you don't communicate. Thanks for establishing that you're the problem.

Maybe you're just gay?

What about, „can you gently caress my nipples untill i‘m dripping wet because otherwise it‘s painfull“ is „not communicating“ in your head?

You should be grateful that a man can maintain an erection with you given how whiny you evidently are in bed.

That's not what you did though.
You posted a 5 minute long rant about how he's not performing well in bed, and then expect him to extract some 'advice' or 'pointers' out of it.
You're just a nagging woman, and guys LOVE nagging women.

If everyone is sexually frustrated, why not find a solution instead of suffering in silence? Everybody would benefit from that.

Except it‘s not. Men who are able to have sex are sometimes content with the sex they have. Haven’t met a girl who could even put her name under THAT statement.
Obviosuly not all of them, but the biggest complaint isn‘t that they don‘t enjoy the sex they have but that it‘s not happening often enough. Which indicates that it is something they enjoy enough to want more of it.

Not really. As i said before, i‘ve had sex with a girl and despite it feeling amazing on a physical level (because she knew how female arousal works...) it didn‘t feel right on an emotional level.

How is „please be gentle with the most sensitive parts of my body“ whiny?

Ok then mr know it all. How would you word it for him if you were in my situation? After all, this is adv and i never claimed to be omniscient.

Besides, obviosuly i worded it different to him than how i explained the situation to you. I‘m not fucking retarded.

Sounds like he just doesn't give a shit on how you feel lol. Why are you two still together?
You still shouldn't generalize because a lot of you women suck in bed too, but I don't go around being all mysogynistic about it. Most people suck at most things because in a very ironic sense, even though we're such a social species, we're generally selfish and dislike communicating with each other.

>If everyone is sexually frustrated, why not find a solution instead of suffering in silence?

Because men that signal vunerability don't get laid.

OP is the female equivalent of the male incel "i havent done being attractive good enough". Justt attitude, no humility or honest about asking for advice..

>Have sex with man
>Don't get off physically or emotionally

>Have sex with woman
>Get off physically but not emotionally

I think the choice is clear. You probably just didn't get off "emotionally" because of the stigma behind being gay. You seen to generally dislike most men and what they are anyway and only stick around them because it's "the normal thing to do"

>But I like men

I don't know. From what this topic tells me, it's quite the opposite. Personally I don't shit talk something but turn around and say "well I like it anyway even though I've been listing reason on why it sucks and is stupid."

When his dick is not hard, he‘s very interested in making me enjoy sex. Once he‘s got an erection, all that goes out the windows.
I agree that a lot of women also suck in bed. I also don‘t go around and be a cunt about it. All i did was make a single thread about it on an anonymous board. I see more men going around and spewing mysogynistic bullshit irl to be honest.
I agree with you on the selfishness of humans. But if we all crave real connection, then why not actually put in some effort? I mean, we‘re married and we have kids. We most likely have to spend a lot of time together still. Why not make that time as enjoyable as we both possibly can?
I don‘t think he just doesn‘t give a shit. It just makes me contemplate if tuning in on a female in a sexual way is really something men are not capable of. Because the evidence i see every day sure implies that.

I agree with you, user.
But to be honest, i can‘t wrap my head around why a person‘s gender should matter so much. If one person can satisfy me physically, how come another person can‘t recreate that? If one person can satisfy me emotionally, there must be others who can make me feel the same, right? What‘s the logic behind the reasoning that those things should be tied to a person‘s gender and not them as human beings?
I mean, it‘s obvious that a girl has an easier time making another girl feel good physically. They just know how to touch a female body. But why would it be that a man is incapable of doing those same things to a girls body? It‘s just touches, timing, intensity, and so on.

I don't do mansplaining anymore, figure it out for yourself woman.
>Besides, obviosuly i worded it different to him than how i explained the situation to you. I‘m not fucking retarded.
Well... Somehow I doubt both those statements. Especially the first.

>asking for advice on adv
I don‘t do mansplaining, figure it out yourself

The absolute state of you, user...

I‘ve told him many hundred times in different ways (also showing him). I think one of those ways surely should have stuck with him atleast a tiny bit, no? After all, he‘s not a tard.
I also made sure to word it positively (do more of that instead of don‘t do that) to not hurt that fragile male ego. But honestly, i‘m on the verge of not giving a shit about this anymore since it doesn‘t seem to be fruitful in any way.

The only thing that interests me is why you are still with this guy.
I'm going to assume for my own mental health and general wellbeing he either has a lot of money or social status, since according to you there isn't a lot of redeeming qualities otherwise.
Also my 'state' is quite good, I have no complaints about my life other than if males could bear children i'd probably be gay.

From my experience, if someone generally cares about someone or something, they will put in the effort to be better at that thing or one. No one can be that dense if you've been supposedly telling him how to please you for years unless he's mentally retarded or low-functioning caretaker tier autistic. The other possibility is that you're in a relationship with a sociopath or psychopath and simply manipulates you to get what he wants out of it, and sounds like he's doing a damn good job that you still stick around him even with the awful sex.
>But if we all crave real connection, then why not actually put in some effort?
Well this is a complicated question with loads of answers but I can give you at least part of one. Communication and connecting is scary for a lot of people. I've seen articles where polls were taken in that people are generally more afraid to speak in public than dying. Yes, literally dying. I've known people who will do all kinds of extreme sports and insane dangerous acts with no hesitation but completely lock up if they even have to speak to a small group of 10 people. I probably will never understand why this is but I noticed that people are afraid of opening up or interacting with others because of how many layers people have.

I never implied that he‘s not a fucking perfect human being in any other way.
I love this guy to death.
That‘s why it is puzzling me so much that we are unable to make our sex more enjoyable for me. Especially since he‘s very caring as long as he hasn‘t got a boner.

Wow it's almost as if the sole purpose of sex is procreation and not mindless hedonistic dopamine hits you dumb roastie

That‘s the point that i don‘t understand.
He‘s fairly intelligent. Not einstein but definitely above average. He‘s got pretty good social skills.
I don‘t doubt that he loves and respects me.
He isn‘t a pushover but he‘s also not selfish.
He‘s generous and caring.
I also don‘t have the slightest doubt that he‘s being genuine and authentic.
Yet as soon as he gets aroused, all that just vanishes. I still refuse to accept that he simply isn‘t capable to translate his positive character to our sex. It simply can‘t be that that‘s not possible.

I‘m aware how scary emotional intimacy and vulnerability is for most people. But again, outside of the bedroom, there‘s no issue with that in our relationship. We talk honestly and openly and we have a genuine connwction whe we talk. Also when we talk about the sex. But again, once it goes down, things basically do a 180...

I agree.
But you know acknowledging that would be the end of male/female relationships as we know them?
Because it means that females only want sex if the timing is right for them to bear a child, as opposed to men who‘s main focus is to spread their seed as often as possible to secure passing down their genes.
If you want to go down that road then society should look like this instead:
Wome get pregnant and then raise theor offspring with thehelp of each other whilst the men fight it out between themselves who‘s worthy of breeding the females who aren‘t pregnant yet.
Imm aware that that would probably be the way human nature was intended, but honestly, it‘s not possible eight now if you don‘t want to be seen as a disgrace to humanity. So we have to go against our nature and try to push together two opposite polars of a magnet.

Women are either in „mother mode“ or in „sexual partner mode“, but those two sadly exclude each other. Which basically makes marriage and family a fucking joke.

>Wome get pregnant and then raise theor offspring with thehelp of each other whilst the men fight it out between themselves who‘s worthy of breeding the females who aren‘t pregnant yet.
>Imm aware that that would probably be the way human nature was intended, but honestly, it‘s not possible eight now if you don‘t want to be seen as a disgrace to humanity. So we have to go against our nature and try to push together two opposite polars of a magnet.
This is exactly what happens though.
Maybe you're just blind to it.
But no, you've obviously figured out how society actually functions, contradictory to nature.

I don‘t know what people are supposed to do with those informations.
I mean, i‘m married and we have two kids. What now?
I love and respect my husband and he is a wonderful dad. Yet i do think that the fact that i don‘t enjoy fucking him is slowly destroying our relationship. It makes me resent him because i feel pressured to disregard my own needs. He starts to resent me because he doesn‘t feel desired.
We tried to find common ground, but it‘s just not happening.
I seriously have considered to tell him to just go fuck other girls to get his ego boost and his nuts drained so we can continue with loving each other and provide a stable family for our kids to grow up in. But again, that‘s so not socially acceptable in any way.

Can you get yourself off? And if so how often do you fap?

I can easily do that.
Depends on my cycle. When i‘m ovulating, i sometimes masturbate 3x a day. Then i might not need it again for 2 weeks.

Quit fapping fully then the only sexual pleasure that you can get is from him. It should help to some degree

I‘ve tried that before for more than a year. Didn‘t change anything.

What else did you try?

Maybe if your pussy wasn't deeper than the grand canyon you might get satisfied every once in awhile

what does this even mean?

Have to be honest..... He either does not care and is making a pretense of trying.... Or he just lacks self discipline.

Maybe you should be looking elsewhere for sex?

Communication is vital yes, but if you do not act on those conversations then it might as well just be wasted time and hot air.

Do you have that full on chemical attraction where it just surges through you?

Because without that being the case, even if someone is attractive to you and meets a mental checklist.... They just won't satisfy you fully.

>I might have talked to about 30 females about this in a honest way and one of them even has had sex with over 100 guys.
You do realize there are BILLIONS of people living on the earth right?

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I have a very fulfilling and active sex life with my boyfriend. He is fantastic and is always surprising me.
It seems there is not a lack of desire but a lack of understanding what one another wants.
>plus you seem bitter af

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>might have had sex with over 100 guys
So let me get this straight
This bitch's tires are so treadbare that we've moved from hotdogs and are just strongarming PVC pipe down that hall.

And your first thought is "yeah, she probably has her head on straight about relationships."
I'd be surprised if she was even capable of an orgasm anymore. Maybe don't ask someone whose dissatisfaction with sex brought them to fuck 100 people??

Like crashing 100 cars doesn't make me think he's 'experienced,' it makes me think 'you couldn't teach him to pour water out of a boot with instructions on the heel.'
Fucking 100 guys and claiming no satisfaction doesn't make me think she's a sexual goddess, it makes me think she's damaged goods to the point where even physical stimulus is no longer hiding the awful feelings she's left unrequited for so long.

If all men are the problem what kind of answer are you looking for an Jow Forums? serious question

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Men providing and women being not satisfyed with anything is a pretty old theme

>sex life

I never understood this phrase, how is fucking a "life"

>I am unsatisfied with my vidya life
>I wish I had a better shower life
>my sleep life is great
>my eating life is pretty good I'd say
>I need to get a better walking life

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Most people are mediocre

Therefore most interactions of any kind are mediocre

The end.

Sounds like my man OP, I honestly don’t know why it is so hard for him to tune in. I mean, he tries, even during sex, but somehow it just doesn’t quite work. Thought it was just me

>girl just starfishes and has all these wants and needs and desires
>Instead of playing with her nipples as you missionary or rubbing clit or touching guy or anything at all
>Simply asks he not only pound you but take care of the rest while he's at it so you can lay back and enjoy
Or, ya know, participate. You've been with the man for years, how can you not figure out how to meet him half way? If I know my dog will shit in the house if I don't let him out for 6 hours, I'm not going to be upset when hour 6 comes up and he does what he does.

Your guy wants to pound you, and instead of setting yourself up for that, you start off cold and let him do it all.

>as soon as he gets aroused, all that just vanishes
It's been studied that mens cognitive functions go out of the window when they get sexually aroused. I'm glad I don't have to deal with that because I'm a hetero male myself and I can tell that I couldn't count to 5 when I get in that zone. But I think that it's something that is good for the reproduction of humans

Would he be open to the idea of wearing a chastity belt, and you only letting him out when you're ready? It might help him take the focus off his own dick to learn/explore your body at your pace.

Whenever I've had sex with girls I was the one doing the work, I was the active part. So the dynamic was that that I would be the doer. We get hot and heavy? I take her clothes off or else it just stays a makeout session. Oral? I go down on her or position myself to get my dick sucked. Switching positions? I switch positions. I''ve never had a girl physically initiate any of that. So basically most of the things that happened during sex were due to me doing them. Now if these girls wanted to ride me sensually instead of fast and hard doggy, why didn't they actively position themselves on top of me? If they wanted to get head longer, why didn't they pull my head into their crotch. If they wanted me to caress their nipples slowly while their ride me, why didn't they guide my hand? Why didn't they become more active, why didn't they give the tact and take what they wanted? I mean being purely passive and reactive is one thing but then complaining that I didn't do this or couldn't do that would be pretty lazy

One of two reasons. mens indifference to women, or womens passivity in communication/action.

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1Ti 5:6 KJV
6) But she that liveth in pleasure is dead while she liveth.

Rom 8:12-14 KJV
12) Therefore, brethren, we are debtors, not to the flesh, to live after the flesh.
13) For if ye live after the flesh, ye shall die: but if ye through the Spirit do mortify the deeds of the body, ye shall live.
14) For as many as are led by the Spirit of God, they are the sons of God.

Act 2:38 KJV
38) Then Peter said unto them, Repent, and be baptized every one of you in the name of Jesus Christ for the remission of sins, and ye shall receive the gift of the Holy Ghost.

>>I don’t know how to pleasure a woman

>men lack basic empathy to tune in on a partner during sex.
What does this actually mean?

Because you, like all women, have completely high and unrealistic standards

>a woman talking about men
>it's all bitter and enforcing anti-women sentiment
I don't get it
I fucking idolize my mother. She's glory incarnate and I'd polish the ground she walked on.

The thing about these kinds of statements is that they're always assumed to basically just be taken as 'it works until it doesn't.' Like it's true until it's not, then it's suddenly there's exceptions and shit, it's all subjective and shit.

But only when it works for their argument

How was that in any way unclear
If you're just stupid then start replacing words with simpler synonyms until you understand because it is a very straightforward sentence.

ITT, generic sweeping statement that is demonstrably untrue gets guaranteed replies because Jow Forums is normie as fuck.

Typical roastie going into full assault mode when their vague phrases start being inquired about. You could've already answered the question in the time you took to type out that crappy non-post.

I'm not a chick you faggot, and that sentence isnt vague at all.
The fact you cant handle a fourth grade vocabulary is your fault.

English isn't evem my first language. What does "tune in on a partner" mean? Like you turn your knob until you're catching your partner's radio signal? Lmao faggot.

>mention 'empathy' once
>their brains completely shut down
This explains so, so fucking much.

95% of men love their mom to bits but that pic still has lotsa truth in it