My bf asked me how many men I slept with and I lied and said I only slept with my last two bfs and him.
I feel guilty for lying. Should I come clean? What if he thinks I'm a slut? I went through a period in my life where I went on a lot of tinder dates resulting in sex but no relationship
He knows you lied. Just come out and tell the truth because you cant keep up the lie forever.
Sex comes so much easier for women that we will feel disgusted finding out our gf is a slut but after that's worn off things will be fine as long as you show him you're extremely committed. Reassure him you are his repeatedly. Truth is the best foundation for long term relationships and lies only beget more lies and this damages things. Dont lie to your partner.
Not unless there's a chance he'll find out on his own, because then he'll distrust you. If you tell him on your own, though, he'll still distrust you for having lied in the first place.
Males on this board won't like to hear this, but this doesn't affect his life, as long as you don't have any STDs. You don't really owe him that much information, as you didn't owe him access to your body before you met him.
A lot of men are really irrational and think a woman can somehow "cheat" on them before ever meeting them, in their own minds. They'll make up excuses to make this sound less ridiculous, but that's all it is.
This is a bait thread.
I refuse to believe even the dumbest roastie is THIS dumb.
Tell the truth if you see your relationship on the long term.
How many op
It's not that we think you cheated before you met us. It's that we dont want a women that has had a million cocks in her before ours. You slurs are not good long term relationship material and you know this deep down.
If you have a girlfriend who is completely loyal, the perfect mother and potential wife, what difference does it make if she's had lots of sex? The answer is none. It's just that in your lizard brain, the image of her getting pounded by other men raises feelings of jealousy and rage. It's an irrational chemical reaction, and useless if she's well-adjusted in other ways and has no diseases. No point in trying to make it logical, just admit what it is.
>You sluts
I'm a virgin and a complete shut-in raised by overprotective grandparents, but okay.
unless you’re a virgin you have no right to expect that from them
Actually it's a sign that they cant hold onto a relationship for very long. I dont know why this is so difficult for you to understand. Every slut I've dated was awful to me and crazy. My wife is a nerdy shut in who had sex twice before meeting me, I've had more sex than she has. She is a great partner.
Dont get me wrong, a manwhore/fuccboi is much the same as a slut. They dont make for good long term partners. It's just sex comes so much easier for women that it's basically effortless. At least I can applaud a guy for nailing a lot of chicks. That takes effort.
Sure do. Again. It is effortless for a woman to have sex. There is zero merit involved.
I don't think the exact number is relevant. I went on a lot of tinder dates but it's in the past
It was a lot wasnt it. Whew lass
>I don't think the exact number is relevant.
It's relevant
Round down to the closest 100
This is awful bait but because incels, it's gaining traction. What has happened to this board.
>Actually it's a sign that they cant hold onto a relationship for very long.
If it's a case similar to OP's, they clearly don't want a relationship with those people, just sex.
how does that matter? what a sad way to percieve sex.
If you feel like you've changed and want a real relationship then I'd tell him. Depending on his personality and how long you've waited to tell him he might be upset, but be sure to emphasize that you've changed if that's that case. The lying part isn't good, but I feel like it's natural for a woman to be embarrassed about having sex with the deep rooted culture of slut shaming and being the object of male sex conquest.
>how does that matter?
The lock and key image gets posted here so often you would know it if you're a veteran here. If I really have to break it down for you when it's so simple that is sad user.
Someone that has had many flings is not long term relationship material. Full stop. Use your brain.
Exactly. But for a good man or good woman it's basically the same shit.
The sexual revolution really didnt benefit anyone besides manwhores. Women were rused into thinking its liberating to be a whore when the reality is far from the truth.
If I'm a high quality man do I go for the slut or the nerdy shut in? I went for the nerdy shut in and am very happy.
The lock and key metaphor is retarded and only people with high school mentality can't see that
Explain how its retarded. It makes complete sense.
Lmao @ all the slut coping
Bait thread.
>If you have a girlfriend who is completely loyal, the perfect mother and potential wife, what difference does it make if she's had lots of sex?
She is by definition not loyal, as she is incapable of saving herself for marriage. No, not loyal to me or some other guy specifically, loyal to the *concept* of a spouse, who she has full control over choosing.
I'm sure you could find a "reformed" prostitute who wouldn't cheat, but acknowledging such behavior as anything more than vile encourages more to do it--and far more people will NOT be 'loyal' with such behavior, which does have demonstrable consequences towards stability and happiness in relationships. The modern mess is a result of amorality taking root, where no standards are permissible, and it becomes a race to the bottom with no barriers in place to prevent people from becoming whores or manwhores in the first place.
onlinelibrary.wiley.com
>Bivariate results suggested that delaying sexual involvement was associated with higher relationship quality across several dimensions. The multivariate results indicated that the speed of entry into sexual relationships was negatively associated with marital quality, but only among women."
onlinelibrary.wiley.com
>"I find that premarital sex or premarital cohabitation that is limited to a woman's husband is not associated with an elevated risk of marital disruption. However, women who have more than one intimate premarital relationship have an increased risk of marital dissolution."
psycnet.apa.org
>"Both structural equation and group comparison analyses demonstrated that sexual restraint was associated with better relationship outcomes, even when controlling for education, the number of sexual partners, religiosity, and relationship length."
This
it is way more complex than a key and a lock and I’m not even defending thots who love sleeping around but how can you get on your high horse and expect a virgin girlfriend/wife when you don’t even live up to your standards you’re not a master key who opens locks youre just a degenerate who is 10x more likely to catch something
Yes I'm expecting someone who has had a lot of partners to be able to stay loyal lmfao
Because vaginas aren't locks holding something important so it doesn't matter if it lets lots of things in. It's used by the same people think several different dicks will change the shape of a vagina but one dick thousands of times or returning to shape after a baby is easy. Literally anyone with the slightest iota of biology knowledge beyond basic high school level knows it's nonsense.
> deep rooted culture of slut shaming
I wish. It's FAR more likely for a girl to be dumped or insulted for being "frigid" or "prudish" when she doesn't want to be used. Ask any girl who's waited--manwhores all run for the hills when she says she's saving herself for marriage.
Not him, but it's retarded for a society. On an individual level, it is somewhat true--i.e. successful men will have an easier time attracting partners (but their partner count is in no way what makes them successful), while whores make for shitty ones.
Taken to a societal level, it's a contradictory and self-defeating double standard. If you give everyone in an apartment complex a master key, all the locks behave as if they're shitty anyway; i.e. encouraging male degeneracy will necessarily increase female degeneracy.
>marriage
Why would you do it. You can have a family and kids without getting married. I'd rather risk paying child support than losing half my shit instantly
He has the right to know. If you didn't want to tell him, then just don't say anything. Don't lie.
I never expected my wife to be a virgin and she wasnt when I got married. I'll ask again. If I have a choice as a high quality man, between a slut thats banged 100 guys and a woman that has had sex less than 10 times, twice, whatever, which would I choose?
A slut is not something we want to wife up with and it's better you accept it than deny it and foster negative feelings over. A slut is someone that makes poor decisions.
Definitely less than 100!
Probably closer to 50
You dont understand the metaphor
It’s a shit metaphor since locks are supposed to be paired to a single key. A key that opens many locks is not good for the locks since they’re supposed to protect what’s inside.
I’m not telling you to wife up a slut who has has 100 dicks inside of her and I absolutely agree that kind of behavior shows poor judgement on her behalf all I’m saying is you should hold yourself to that same standard. If you have fucked 100 thots then you happen to be just as stupid as them
You still dont understand the metaphor
Not him but if you think about it, it's easier as a girl to fuck than not fuck and it's easier as a guy to not fuck than fuck, so both slut shaming and virgin shaming make some sense because it's the path of least resistance in both cases.
What the fuck are all this retarded larp threads?!
THERE AREN'T ANY FEMANONS HERE!!
Tits or gtfo!!
Of course you have to pick MY lefty comment as usual to reply to.
Oh, it's very possible to slut shame and dump a girl for being a prude.
Like you have said yourself, most guys don't want to bang a whore, but they want to bang all the same.
But this gal is well beyond saving herself for marriage, so could you kindly fuck yourself off.
>you should hold yourself to the same standard
And I have. I called out manwhores earlier in our discussion. Maybe if you would stop reeing for a moment youd be able to retain the content of my posts.
It’s a shit metaphor, mate. People are more complicated than locks and keys.
You still dont understand the metaphor. You're applying it literally.
Explain it then.
You can always identity bait like this because no real woman uses Stacy wojak.
Sure. If they expect a relationship with a man, he can expect what he wants from then. You have every right you can defend
You don't get to decide people don't understand the metaphor when they clearly do, it's just stupid as fuck. I understand it's trying to emulate abrahamic religion brain washing but that doesn't make it less retarded or flawed.
Not reeing just gave my pov didn’t know you were the one who posted that earlier
It's been explained already. It is a crude metaphor, but still works. Read the thread.
This
Lies kill you, not them
Yeah that’s what I thought, faggot. You don’t understand it yourself.
*them
Women in 2019:
> facts aren't relevant
Lol OP honesty will always serve you best in the long run. Always.
If you tell the man the truth about your life and he rejects you then he does not love you.
THATS how love works.
Depending on how new the relationship is you can't talk about love already.
You need to be honest about it. And don't get offended if he asks you to test for STDs it is a reasonable request.
No. Women should not be subjected to such interrogations, nor responsible for STDs given to them by men. Fuck off, incel
Do not come clean. He will hate you more if he knows how many people you slept with. Trust me from experience. The less youve slept with the more theyll love you. Its true. So stick with your lie and all ya gotta do is convince yourslef its the truth.
Good God even your satire is obvious and trite
Oh wow this is stuff is getting out of hand how can you blame a man for caring about his own health?
wouldn’t you ask a man to test himself? how absolutely irresponsible of you I bet you haven’t even done it in fear that you have something
>he thinks it's satire
ncbi.nlm.nih.gov
This bait is awful and you people are retards, honestly
>Women in 2019:
> facts aren't relevant
They were always like this lol. Read Otto Weininger's "Sex and Character', he wrote in 1903 about how women don't care about the truth
It’s a white lie. But it’s still lying.
I made the mistake of lying about smoking pot to my ex because it was a deal breaker with her. Now I have a medical card because after she left me I was diagnosed with cancer. Pro tip: just say the truth even if it’ll end the relationship, there’s no point in trying to be someone you’re not for someone who won’t accept you for you.
The real question is how much sex is too much sex? How many different partners is too much for a woman at a certain age say 21? Is even once enough for complete disqualification?
Lmao you really dont understand it
Actually I do. It's you that doesnt and needs an user to explain it to you.
Every day we stray further from god
Obviously it depends on the guy. For me it's less about the amount of sex but the circumstances. If it was with bfs in long term relationships no problem. If it was in the toilet of some club or with random men it's a red flag.
Basically this. I dont want gutter trash. I dont want a tinder whore either.
Dont spread your legs for every guy. Make sure your man isnt a whore.
>wanting women to own their actions
Haha
I don't differentiate between guys/girls for this. If you're having sex with a new person every day/week/month, in my opinion I'd say that's too much. But if you meet someone you really like, become close to them, take it slow, and eventually have sex, I'd say that's fine. There are only so many times you can do that in a lifetime.
Personally, I'm a 20 year old male, I've been in two long term (hetero) relationships and didn't have sex with either, just didn't feel ready myself. It doesn't have to be the goal.
God forgives.
>It's just sex comes so much easier for women that it's basically effortless. At least I can applaud a guy for nailing a lot of chicks. That takes effort.
This, why don't women seem to understand this? Women sleeping with a lot of men signals a lack of self-control, but a man sleeping with a lot of women signals he's charismatic and desirable (unlike women men are not chased after for sex by default, it takes effort). You may not like to hear this but it's true.
No. In both cases it signals a lack of self control.
A guy who tells me he slept around a lot is not attractive at all.
Grats you're actually intelligent. Most women chase after dudes that are whores.
>A guy who tells me he slept around a lot is not attractive at all.
Yeah that's fine and I understand that, you will find many women disagree with you. I'm just saying they're not the same thing no matter how people try to spin it.
Yes it is. Manwhores chase after sluts, sluts throw themselves at attractive dudes.
Sleeping with a slut doesn't take a master in social skills and big dick, it just takes basic social skill.
My boyfriend who has literal autism had chances to sleep with sluts all his life and had a FWB in college, that's how hard it is.
It signals lack of self control. No matter if you're a man or a woman.