Why don’t you have a gf user?

Hi Brandon

I live in a rural area where no one my age exists.

>Go on date.
>You're super cute and funny. Let's meet up again.
>Ghosted.
I must look like a serial killer or something.

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I never even got rated over a 6 on soc but I have a good personality and am genuinely interesting.

What are your positions on the subject?

Also are you saying youd prefer to date someone who holds all the same opinions as you? Or is it a disagreement on core values?

I’m happy for you guys! How did you two meet?

I honestly think I’m bipolar, I can go from being a complete asshole to everyone to the life of a party

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Literally just because I have erectile dysfunction and premature ejaculation at the same time and I have no idea how to fix it. I've tried drugs, quitting porn, exclusively using a fleshlight, etc, nothing helps.

Girls get very disappointed and it's anxiety inducing and it has ruined every almost-gf I've had.

Because I'm scrawny, short, have Asperger's and mentally unstable.

I've been rated 6 and I'm horrible as hell. Personally, I don't trust them

I am introvert

Because I know the end result won't be a good one.

Because when I tried to get a girlfriend I realized that even the ugly and annoying ones have quite a few men waiting for their turn.
Being single is really not that bad, better than competing real hard for a prize that's not even that great. I prefer to keep my dignity than play ghosting simulator.

I don't want to burden a female (or anyone for that matter) with my existence.

This. Only my family deserves my burden because 1) they birthed me and 2) they haven't kicked me out yet

Never leave the house

Cause I live a rockstar life.

Because I haven't healed after my first love dumped my ass and hitched up with another guy. Sad cunt to sick cunt in progress.

Because I just broke up from a long-term gf that I was deep down pretty miserable with. The good parts were just okay but the bad parts were horrible. From her there were break-up threats, ultimatums, arm-twistings and emotional manipulations.
>The female of the species is more deadly than the male

How are you coping? I've been downright miserable since my long-term shit broke off.

I only play FFXIV and go paddleboarding. I like my free time.

It's been two years for me. Being by myself if by far the best plan. I want kids, but I will probably just work out a way to be a single father.

Paddleboarding is super gay

3 weeks later - still lots of sadness and anger and feeling the pain of loss. Some days are okay, I'm staying with supportive friends, and trying to focus on my own projects.

I feel anger at her emotional bullshit and anger at myself for falling for it and not breaking it off way, way sooner when I had clear signs she was pushing me too hard to get the things she wanted out of life and wouldn't accept me as I really was - she was overly optimistic and wanted me to always be the best version of myself. I knew she didn't want my lifestyle about 1 year in, and I didn't want hers, but I let the relationship go on for 2 more years after that, wasting her time and mine because I was a pushover. JFC.

I talked to my friend's parents and they could see it ending as soon as they first met her: "user's putting up with this now but eventually old user's going to come back and he won't like living her way at all"

Because I'm a straight girl and have a bf

what is a gf

because I believed all that pua horseshit which only made me extremely insecure. you need confidence above all yet this shit tells you to put on a massive act because you yourself are not good enough. I quit going to bars. only go to clubs to dance. I quit all that peacocking shit, I wear plain but tasteful and well fitting appearel. I quit with all that "dominance and Masculinity" bullshit because I was tired of being a cunt. then there's the "gotta approach em all" shit which is a fantastic way to come off as the most desperate fuck boy in existence. I've joined an electrical union recently and have work coming up in a month. i'll finally have my own place and finally be away from my triggers (the people around me) for drugs and cigarettes. i'll just lock myself in my room for one weekend to get past the three days of hell when quitting and finally stop smelling like shit all the time. my work will get me in shape and ill finally be able to afford healthy food as well as take classes to learn how to cook. after that I'm going to start doing extensive volunteer work 1) because its something I'm genuinely passionate about and 2) to meet women. I'm not doing it to actually get with women but more that I'm looking for women worth being with. because if theyre this kind to random strangers, imagine how they'll respond to a guy who'll help out around the house everyday, take them on a date every single weekend, always listen to their silly problems, be patient with them, tell them he loves them every day, kisses them every morning and when he returns home, cooks them good ass food, takes care of them when theyre not feeling well, never gets tired of cuddling and making out even if it doesn't lead to sex, wont run off if he gets them pregnant, and eats the royal fuck out of their pussy whenever they like. trust me, they'll worship the ground he walks on. I cant wait anymore, I'm finally excited about the future.

gay

you like penises? that's actually gay, fucking faggot.

My folks told me at the beginning of a toxic 4 year relationship that I would only end up hurting myself. Here I am, almost a year after she ditched me for another guy because I was a really shitty person to her because of my own insecurities, etc, and the frustration born from ruminating on my own self failings is still ripping me apart, while I know at the same time she's in love with that guy and doesn't give a fuck about me. The worst hurt comes from knowing that I could have had an awesome future with her if I had just been nice...
We're all gonna make it eventually.

I get looks from all kinds of girls and I'm not that attractive myself, just confident and average looking so it'll do.

I don't have one currently because I don't just fuck around and see what happens or decide to get with someone I don't connect with and then see what happens. My decisions are a little more calculated and if the girl doesn't seem "right" for me then I date another and see where that goes. So far I've been dating girls that I find sexually attractive but don't click with, its like they're all the same talking about make up, travelling, exercise and fitness or shows they've seen recently but I've no interest in being with people like that so I'm looking for someone that will work better for me. Sometimes it takes months to find a person like that, sometimes it takes years but why would I compromise my own happiness and settle for less than I deserve? I'm not desperate and being alone doesn't bother me either, at least I got time to improve on myself, so works out. I never understood people that need to be constantly in relationships, when do you have time to reflect and improve so you don't make the same mistakes again with someone else? thats the difference between people with stable relationships and people who sleep around or have dozens of partners

don't impress them, theyre the ones who gotta impress you? good job, nigga! :)

>don't put pussy on the pedestal
but seriously, I've seen so many of my desperate friends trying to impress the girl and some of them even succeeded but their relationships were disgusting. These guys would really turn themselves into desperate losers, spending all their money on the girl, worshiping her, forgiving her for shit she's done that other people wouldn't forgive. No self respect. If I'm gonna be with someone it needs to be an equal partnership, not one trying to impress the other. You should be comfortable being yourself around each other, not pretending you're something better because then you'll have to keep up that image and I like when the girl falls for me when I'm being myself, it makes it much easier down the line and encourages a long term relationship rather than a momentary thing because she realized what I'm really like which isn't close to what I would've pretended to be initially so she likes me.

exactly
this post was meyou think I got the right idea too? I think my 7 seven year spells gunna finally come to an end but if it doesn't oh well cuz I'm finally taking that trip to japan and I'm getting the car I always wanted so I'm going to be happy either way. :)

socially retarded

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being a good listener doesn't require much social skills. :)

>defeat my anxiety
>ask a qt out
>she says idea is cool but she has plans
Why i do even try at this at this point.

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I think you got it figured out, from what you wrote anyway.

Living life on your own and having things to look forward to and being happy by yourself is the key to confidence and that confidence projects onto other people, the opposite gender especially. Once I became comfortable in my own skin and stopped feeling sorry for myself and grew confident and independent, I started getting looks from girl ranging from 7-9/10 and I realized I have a shot with each one, but then I realized that the old me would've jumped on the first girl I see, but now I know to look for a deeper connection so I'm more "picky" if you will. Don't compromise your happiness and synchronize yourself with everything that you like and that makes you happy in your life and the right people will start gravitating towards that. When you're unhappy and desperate then these are the sort of people you'll attract. Like mirrors. The only way to see the change is to stop looking out for it, it should come then, if you do everything for the purpose of getting a girl then you're betraying your own ambitions with a false rationale behind them. The right people should follow you on your journey, not be it's destination

I am a good listener, but often at a loss for words. Got assburgers out the ass and serious trust issues.

this is what the fuck they mean by "stop looking for love and it'll find you." it means you'll finally learn to love yourself which makes you attractive.

Cause my ex is a physco who ruined a good thing cause she didn't know where exactly the future was heading.

And because I am scared to talk to new girls

so do I and I couldn't give any less of a shit.

want some advice about the new girl issue?

Thanks!
I met her when I moved in with some new roommates, she had been friends with them in high school. I came home drunk ome night and she was over at our house playing board games, an somehow I didnt totally spaghetti and we planned a joint birthday a fortnight from that date (our birthdays are 3 days apart, though she a year older). She was in a 7 yr long relationship at the time, but they weren't doing so well together. There was immediate chemistry and she took me as a bad boy. I had done all the things she wanted to do - traveled a lot, was in charge of sailing club, worked with kids. A few months after I met her she broke up with her boyfriend. It felt a little greasy at the time because although I wasnt trying to take advantage of her I knew she was in a vulnerable position. But I also knew I had to act because she is absolutely beautiful and smart and a total catch and I couldn't let her slip by me without trying to be with hr. I knew from the day that we started dating I wanted to marry her, and started saving for a ring that year.

if you're on the look out for it then it may be following in your footsteps and never reach you. If you stick to your path then it is written for you to find someone across it, because your path is right for you, and the person on it is bound to be too. If you look everywhere, you'll find everything, and everything isn't written for everyone. Be true with your intentions and it'll become admirable, admirable means respect and respect breeds honesty and further admiration. Be admired, keep improving. When you stop improving because you got a girl then she will get bored of you, because you're stagnating and relationships are always meant to be moving forward. It just makes sense that way to me, but mostly good things have happened once I adapted that mindset. Much better things happened than when I was depressed and wallowing in self pity hoping for the world to say sorry and a girl to take me out of the hole

should I get a puppy to deal with lonliness?

the girl wont make you happy, youll just make her miserable.

Because I have other things to do with my very limited money and time

Not sure, never had a pet myself. But I imagine it would at least give you purpose and make you feel less lonely as a consequence of that. I dealt with loneliness by myself but eventually you'll need people, even friends from far away, human contact is necessary since we're social creatures.

My friend used to refuse going anywhere and hanging out, always stayed home and played games all day. His dog adapted his attitude and behavior and became super needy. If you think your lonely and it might rub off on the puppy then don't do it to the animal, deal with it yourself until you feel ready for an animal I suppose but I've never had a pet myself so I'm only speaking from observations. If by making yourself happy you hurt others or put them at a disadvantage, it usually is a better idea to fix yourself up first and then get people or pets to join you. You want to make others happy too, don't just expect others to make you happy, it won't last or you'll make them unhappy

Why not just try and gf them before you sex them. Then theyll like you and stuff and it wont be such a dealbreaker. And you'll feel more comfortable around the girl which might help your issues by reducing your anxiety

I honestly can't tell whether its because of my previous relationship being emotionally exhausting and miserable that now prevents me from having any deep connection of the opposite sex due to the fear/caution of going through that same bullshit again
Or I'm just lazy. I just don't wanna put the effort.

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Like I said in response to > If by making yourself happy you hurt others or put them at a disadvantage, it usually is a better idea to fix yourself up first and then get people or pets to join you. You want to make others happy too, don't just expect others to make you happy, it won't last or you'll make them unhappy
Something to think about. Normally in life you want to enhance your feelings that you already established yourself. Everything else is temporary or a shortcut and in life, generally, I like to think that you only get what you put in. There needs to be balance

plus he need ta learn how ta eat da pussy.

lol you done goofed. but yeah to the dog guy. take a trip somewhere for a while to get your mind off all that shit.

>lol you done goofed
explain

you (you)d me twice :)

oh ok kek i thought it was something I said. No way of knowing who I'm replying to since we're all anonymous here

Because I'm uninteresting.
Because I usually don't speak.
Because I have nothing interesting to say when I do speak.
Because I'm afraid of rejection.
Because I'm afraid of humiliation.
Because I'm fat.
Because I don't know how to act.

Because having a gf sucks and I need to focus on myself not pleasing a women. More important things to do than unironically thinking a gf will fix all your problems.
I justed five years in a relationship.and lived with her. you virgins need to listen to everything I say.

yeah tell me what you think of this thread
Bait?

>I had done all the things she wanted to do - traveled a lot, was in charge of sailing club, worked with kids
>this is the minimum you have to do to compete with hypersocial Chads and get to touch a 5/10 female

Guess I'm giving up.

I read that thread.
Don't think it is, people do that all the time. That's why people cheat. There's shitty people everywhere and some are even worse so I wouldn't be surprised if it was real. Some people just have more common sense than others and have better morals

think hell find out?

One way or another, yes. Lies are hard to contain and sometimes, especially girls like her, when they get drunk they spill out so its only a matter of time. Or guilt will get to her eventually so she'll tell. If the thread isn't bait then she'll at least have the posts to consider and the fact she's asking about it means she's thinking of telling him. So yeah, question is, what will the guy do? if it happened once then people are usually forgiving, if it happened more than once then its usually a no go and he'll break up with her

I don't think I could forgive that shit. ive it happen to multiple people and the offender always cheated again

What do you do to past the time? Other than go on walks, Jack off, and go off roading

depends. When you're with someone for a long time and you establish some sort of connection then it'll be harder to just dump someone like that. Things are different when you're in that situation. But it also depends on many variables. Like, was she aware of what she was doing? was she too drunk to remember and the guy took advantage? maybe it won't happen again? maybe she did it deliberately? I know a girl who constantly cheats on her bf and he knows about it, but its security and free sex so some people put up with it, desperate people. Thats why you figure yourself out first and then find someone on your level, other than that you're acting on desperation and it comes with it's own share of desperate situations and circumstances. Deal with it if you're desperate, be better and seek better if you're not. You only get as much as you put in like I said earlier

Calm down little one. It's not the minimum. It was just comparative, and all those things put me in a better light than her other option(s). I mean I also work a labouring job and am overweight, so I didnt really think I was a catch at the time. There is no minimum standard- there I a myriad of factors involved that depend entirely on your individual circumstance as to how much someone will like you - there is no blanket statement for what people find attractive. You just have to have something to offer that she thinks she wont find elsewhere.
Now after I just made a point that you cant stereotype, I'm going to give you a stereotypical list of what 90% of women want: a man who is hygienic, who makes enough money to do things that he wants to do, who can make her laugh and raise her spirits, and who can hold an interesting conversation.
Also, my gf is not a 5, shes an 11/10.

...

I'm going to basically be new to relationships once I finally move out. what are some red flags of someone like this?

Because I learned the hard way I'm better of single. I dont think I'm just emotionally mature enough for a relationship. Also I'm not in the greatest shape and a girl who would like me would be some kind of fetishist.

It's hard to tell honestly. Just how slutty the girl is and her history should be a give away of what she's capable of and then I'd be skeptical, but still try and find out more. If you have a bad feeling about someone then follow that feeling until you feel good about someone.

If the thread is real and the girl cheated on her bf after 5 years then who could've seen it coming? Don't let that discourage you tho, there's plenty of girls who respect loyalty and stick to it. Some don't. It also depends on how much you commit to the relationship. If you think that after the initial honeymoon phase you bagged her and don't need to put in any effort, then she might start looking around for other partners sooner or later. Same with the guy if the girl wasn't putting in any effort anymore, and the guy wasn't desperate. But you really have to let yourself go to get to that stage.

Best way for me to find out if I like the girl or not is to take her out to a pub on one of the dates and get a few drinks, in a social setting and see how she acts sober vs tipsy or if you stay for awhile, drunk. I met girls who were lovely and super shy when sober and I liked them, but then I met them on a night out when they were black out drunk pretty much throwing themselves at every guy they see. I asked the girl out initially and got rejected. Then she came onto me a few months later in a pub and started touching me everywhere until I got her to stop. That's how I figured out she wasn't worth my time

alcohol reveals the true self. also I already told you how I plan to treat women, of course as long as they deserve it

also I think youre the true mentor ive always been looking for.

often times it does yeah, but that doesn't mean you should shove drinks down her throat to see what she's really like kek, if it happens then it happens and you'll know.

Most of the things you need to know you won't learn from advice from strangers online, it's mostly practice so you need to put yourself out there and don't be discouraged by rejections, failed attempts. It's all a part of the learning process. Even 10/10 guys get dumped and rejected, and some 6/10 guys could break a heart of some 10/10 girl. Everything happens. Good luck.

believe it or not but I've had that effect on many people in my life. I even give my mother advice now and I'm only 24. Some of my friends think and act the way I do because they see it as an improvement over their own actions and I've been told they look up to me. I suppose what I'm trying to say is that I'm not pulling my advice from my ass, its all based on things I know to be true since I've done them myself so they could be applicable to your life too, people aren't all that different you know, human psychology is universal in the way it works, when you meet enough people in your life you'll realize that quickly

oops

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understood. but wether they cheat or not imma let them know that they fucked up a golden opportunity. and if I do "forgive" I'm going to fuck somebody else first and let her know in advance before I do it. still a whore is much better than a psycho bitch

Because I'm dealing with bettering myself after ruining a long term relationship with the woman of my dreams.

Try not to be resentful. If they hurt you, don't do it to others because it'll come back to you. Be better than them, for you. What if you end up meeting a girl who learned about you fucking some girl out of spite and she didn't like it? you'll miss your golden opportunity then, you don't want to be at risk. Leave cheaters be cheaters, but not to you and your sacrifice will be rewarded. It's just the way it works, I don't know how or why, it's like clockwork, all gears need to perform right or the whole mechanism will be a mess and it may have unwanted consequences

because I'm afraid to put myself out there since I have huge problems with self loathing and depression

This, check for check, life fucking sucks

I see. guess I still have issues to smooth out. thanks buddy!

its cool. Everyone has issues, everyone is born with them, all you can do is identify them and if you don't like them; fix them. Be the person you'd want to be around and chances are, others will want to be too

>letting cancer like Jow Forums slip into your real life
Enjoy your girlfriend while it lasts

Because I actually want a cute boy bf. Girls are annoying

>am genuinely interesting
>said nobody actually interesting, ever
Get your fucking stick out of your ass

I think I'm just about there now :)
been a PAINFUL fucking process :(

but yeah, typically if I'm always putting forth the effort with a relationship, 9 times outta ten I usually don't have anything to worry about do I?

because I keep moving every couple months and it is fucking killing me.

I'm mentally ill, I work in retail, I'm still going to college despite being in my late 20's, I never had relationships with women before and women don't like being anyone's first, was previously married to abusive man before and no woman wants to deal with my trauma issues, and I'm just not attractive enough.

Oh well. Dying alone sounds easy.