Gf's been having some recurring dreams for years which have been worrying me.
In the first one, which she's been having since she was 8 (she's 20 now), she enters in a house only to find out it's a room with no windows or doors. She turns around to get out, but when she does so she notices the door she came from has disappeared. Suddenly everything gets darker, the room starts to shrink until she chokes to death.
The second one, she's been having it for 2-3 years now. A family of three (father, mother and son), not hers, is in a small, dark room on a ship. There's a door barely open from where some light comes. They start reading books which hypnotize them, but because of some random symbols they understand they're being manipulated, and outside everything become distorted and nightmare-like, even if before it looked beautiful. The son goes out, but he doesn't come back. The parents go out looking for him, but the mother is swallowed from a wall, while the father loses his eyes, which fall into his hand and he starts seeing everything distorted and demon-like. Gf sees the whole thing both from the outside and the father's eyes
Could they mean anything? Being recurrent I'm somewhat worried as I think they might hint at traumas, I asked her to talk about them with a psychologist/psychotherapist but she's still thinking about it
as far as psychology goes, recurrent dreams are manifestation of your subconsciousness warning you of some problems that are repetitive/not fixed.
Make her visit a psychologist, probably go on a psychotherapy. Looks like she needs that, as it's probably related to some childhood trauma which she may barely even remember already.
Owen Price
I agree with This sounds like she's deeply supressed some childhood trauma somewhere. Like maybe she was molested in her sleep according to the first scenario. The second one is entirely too cryptic for it to be one solid trauma and it may be multiple that have combined.
Juan Garcia
Agreed with poster. Dreams and their themes, reoccurring or not, are a wonderful window to your subconsciousness.
I often have reoccurring themes of zombies or an apocalypse, or partying with my friends and boyfriend. The zombie dreams have been happening well over a year.
Your dreams change with your waking life because your subconscious is constantly buzzing with thoughts and feelings of it you may not even realize you have.
You can get books on dreams and their meanings or just google it
Alexander Smith
Just a stab in the dark I'm going to say she's seen her father rape her mother. But I'd suggest she seeks professional help.
Nathaniel Baker
For the first I thought it might have been from when her parents closed her in a closet as punishment, or when her classmates did the same thing in grade school, I think she developed claustrophobia from that. The molestation part is also possible, as her ex is a pedo who molested her in several occasions
The second I'm not sure honestly, lately she had issues for which she was this close to become a shut-in, and even now she's fighting that, so I thought it might be related, but it sounds too simple
Asked her to, will see once she goes back to uni as right now she can't
Her parents do have issues, but it's actually the opposite as her father hasn't been attracted to her mother since she got fat. They also used to fight a lot, and her whole family is very problematic
Luke Brooks
>Her parents do have issues, but it's actually the opposite as her father hasn't been attracted to her mother That's probably why the fathers eyes fall out, and she sympathises with him which is why she sees through the fathers eyes in the dream.
Ethan James
She's always been more on her mother side though, she even blocked every porn site from the router so that her father would have sex with her mother
Daniel Martinez
I'm I mean, I wouldn't go as far as saying that for sure it's related to some sexual problems that happened in her life/she has seen without knowing her personally and being able to help her right there as much as a psychologist can do. However, it is a possible scenario. She's definitely got some huge problems as a ground for her mentality basically, which are just manifesting themselves with problems later in her life as we can see by having second recurring dream in her life since her 17's. This is definitely not good, her mental stability is based on some underlying problems which need to be solved. Hope you find some help for her ASAP.
Thanks for the pic user. I asked her more than once to talk with a psychologist, and she did go once around January, but outside that one time she always refused to. I know already she does have some problems, but she wants to overcome them on her own
Owen Brooks
It could be suppressed trauma. But it dosent mean it’s for sure something bad happened. Trauma in a young mind can be anything, and not rational. It could also be her dumb brain on sleep and nothing significant. It’s really hard to find out, so if it doesn’t really affect you guys... don’t try to fix it.
Owen Walker
As far as I can tell from my own experience with my current gf, her wanting to overcome it on her own is just going to cause a lot of trouble in the long run, hurting not only her, but also your relationship that both of you have. It's very dangerous to go alone there. You'll have to make her let help herself after some time, but without making her feel it's obtrusive. Just that it's important not only for her, but also for you and your relationship.
Unfortunately, my gf only understood it when we were at the verge of breaking up because of her actions, so it's definitely going to be a tough one for you too.
She had some great results in the past months, but for the past 2 or so she has been having a very bad relapse, and I don't know what to do. Her parents don't really help with the situation, at times they seem to not care that much, other times it seems like they want to see her suffer? She wanted to talk with a neurologist last week, but her mother was against it and forbid her. She also has been in need for medical care for months (not mental health, just regular doctor visits) and they kept on saying things like "no you don't need them" I am definitely gonna move with her next year, but if shit hits the fan I'm gonna drop uni even next month, as I'm visiting her for a few weeks before my last year starts
Zachary Roberts
Dreams don't usally have any kind if meaning. Its just how the brain sorts information.
Jaxon Ortiz
basically got the same problems with parents of my gf. just out of curiosity, was your gf planned or not? seems like in my case her mother and stepfather are just like that because she wasn't planned at all
She also has a little sister, which I'm not sure but I thin was planned, and from what she told me her parents always cared more about her sister. Yeah, she is. We've been together for barely a year, but we've known each other for almost 4 (if things went a bit different, we'd have been together since the very start as we always had feelings for each other). We're planning on moving together next year when I finish uni, but like I said I might be stalling my last year till she gets better, then getting married once she finishes uni in 3-4 years
Luke Bailey
Well, my advice would be, don't drop out of uni. If anything goes wrong, you guys won't be able to find a job and live together. Help her as much as you can in this time, but don't try to sacrifice your whole career because of that. If she is a keeper, she will 100% understand that and you have to be able to sustain her for some time at the beginning when she moves in. Definitely, if she's got some problems with her parents just treating her as she was just renting a room from them, moving out will probably change her life and make her a shit ton more happy person. Well, I want to do the same with my gf because of that. Whatever life will bring to you, be confident in what you are doing and don't let your emotions control you, especially anger. I just hope you didn't do the same mistakes as I did.
If you want, we can exchange Discord or something, since we've got some similarities in our stories and this thread is not going to last forever. (just so that there won't be anyone impersonating me in case you agree, part of my nickname is lei).
It's not actual dropping out, but rather stalling the year and finishing it the year after, so it wouldn't be a problem. She actually doesn't want me to do it, and I'm pretty sure she'd be mad at me, but I can't just leave her like that. She moved out for uni last year, going back only for holidays, and while her situation did improve in some aspects, in others if got worse (almost became a shut-in, social anxiety went through the roof, her ED returned).
My discord is kinpatsu #4468, but I don't really use it that much
James Barnes
You're correct in assuming that this is trauma based. Recurrent dreams or subconscious warnings are often traumatic in nature (by pure virtue of them being so common). Unfortunately I can only interpret this dream as if I were having it so I'll do my best.
Just like when you find yourself naked with feelings of extreme vulnerability in your dream it usually means you're hiding something you don't want people to see. So it is as well when you're trapped that you perceive a situation in the waking world as threatening, inescapable and or helpless. The family being a recurrent theme in the dreams could indicate some sort of pathological family dynamic, some anons mentioned sexual assault which wouldn't be a stretch.
I often dreamed when I moved countries as a teenager that I was at my old school with all my friends. now looking back my subconscious was advising me to go see my old friends because I needed connection in my life.
Tell your gf to recount the dream and then ask her what the different parts of her dream make her feel. This should shed some light
Kevin Gomez
She's always extremely scared, so much she didn't want to tell them to me at first as she didn't even want to recall them
Jeremiah Jenkins
Eh, her being a shut-in won't help much in this case. I hope she will go to psychotherapy at least.
