Lunar Thread

Good evening anonymous, I hope you're having a good week so far. Welcome to the Lunar threads.

Tell us about your troubles, how you've been doing lately, some good things that happened to you recently or anything else you may wish to talk about. We're a group of anons gathered here to lend an ear, chill out and perhaps give some advice that can help you.

With that being said, if you like our threads then we'll gladly welcome your company back. While some threads can happen outside this schedule, we usually get together every week around this time, so check the catalogue every Friday!

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Last call.

I've had a good friend of mine lie to me about who they are for the past five years. Everytime we seemingly grow closer or bond over some common life experience, it kills me to know that the closeness is built on a foundation of dishonesty.

I'd rather not lose this friend of mine, if at all possible, but this cannot continue if I plan to continue having this person in my life. Any recommendations as to what I should do or how I should approach a confrontation?

Nero, where did you get your display name from? it's nice, and I like it.
how did you find out they are lying to you? do you think they had a reason for lying? people can change user, and grow from their past of lying. if you and your friend have a strong enough bond, perhaps you can ask them about it.

My neighbors smoke a lot and it makes me stuff up. I have been trying to quit myself and have made it about 2 months and I have been going nuts with telling them they reek and throwing insults when they disturb me with their smoke. It even goes through my window which I keep open to keep cool I'm this summer heat. They were unwilling to budge and used to give me shit for my smoking bothering them. So I don't know what to do. I can't move because rent is expensive and I hate working.

Then they kept me up one night, so I kept them up one morning and they keep trying to intimidate me for it.

I'm not sure what to do. Fire with fire isn't working.

Should I just start recording them and show the police?

There is no solid evidence of lying; I haven't outright caught them in the act. But there are several inconsistencies in what they say as well as flat out incredulity on my part. Things that sound too good or too fantastical to be true, you follow?

The thing is, this person has admitted to lying to me before. It seems to me as if they've reverted to their old habits again. Motivations for lying? I'm not quite sure. I can only guess the need to impress myself and others? They're somewhat insecure in themselves.

The seasons are changing. It's a new month. Maybe their change in behavior is due to one of those.

Sorry everyone, I went to take a shower.

I think that you should just be direct about it, but deep down you should know who your friend is to you regardless of who he claims to be or actually is. Telling them about how that's been bothering you but that they're a good friend and you don't want to lose them is a good way to lead up to asking them why they lied and so on.

If I recall correctly, I was looking for a simpler namefag so I just went with the name of my waifu. That a bunch of people get really triggered when they think of that one guy that crucified all the Christians and had lots of orgies is just an added bonus thay comes with the turf. Overall though, it's the namefag that's stuck the longest so I just use it.

You don't have to record shit, you can just call the cops if they're making noise and they'll tell them to stop.
As for the smoking, have you tried buying any sort of candles or air fresheners to combat it? It won't stop them from smoking but it might just keep the smell off of you.
On a side note, don't bother fighting your neighbors, you're both not moving any time soon so it's counterproductive.

I started a new job as a 911 dispatcher (currently training) for emergency, fire and security calls and I don't feel like I can do it and I am extremely stressed everyday. I have no experience in any of the fields and it may ruin the only relationship I've ever had because of time constraints. I can't quit because the pay is amazing for someone who has only worked retail. I've more than doubled my previous salary, and if I did everyone would hate me. I'm pretty sure nepotism got me this job.

I'm just so fucking stressed out. I wish I could go back in time, or win the lottery. fuck

Lies are lies, whether they occur during the Summer, Autumn, Winter, or Spring. And as I've said before, this is a relapse in behavior a few months maybe even years in the making.

Give me a sample approach.

Are the time constraints going to be the same after training or will you end up with a normal schedule? Because if you have a good long-term relationship with someone then it's probably not worth sacrificing it over the pay raise; but if it's just some fling that's working then it's probably worth more in the long run to just keep the job, in my opinion. Have you talked about it with your partner?
As for stress, you just need to find an alleyway to get rid of it. Do some sport or hobby after work to unwind. Just because it's stressing now that doesn't mean that you can't adapt, get used to it and reap the benefits for going through with it.

"Hey X, I've kind of noticed a few things about that have been really bothering me. You know you've said you're Y? Well actually, because of Z and A I don't think that's true, it's just too good to be true! You're a great friend to me and I don't want to lose you, but I hate the thought of the possibility that you've been lying to me about some things all along. Just tell me, did you tell the truth or not?"

Something along those lines. I can't really pitch in without actually context, but that's the gist of it. At the end of the day you're the one that knows this person and knows what works with them, so just try to give it your best shot.

Normal schedule, and right now it's a close friendship I've had for a while but I want to turn it into a long term relationship and am so close, but this is getting in the way. And this person is the only happiness ive had in years.
and I did talk to her and she said it's okay but I feel like I'll lose her interest. I might just be paranoid or insecure or both. also the job itself I don't know if im cut out for it.

It's probably both in this case, you've got your priorities backwards. If it's just a friendship right now then it's not certain that it'll turn into a relationship bo matter how much time you allocate into it. If he likes you back she won't mind you getting a better job and becoming more financially secure and attractive; she'll wait for your training to be over.
If you're paranoid and insecure then make your time with her count. Whether or not you're cut out for the job has nothing to do with knowledge in those areas or previous experience, that's why you're getting training, so you can learn how to do the job properly.
Stick with it and go do something her when you have the time, it's going to pay off once you're done and can spend more time with her.

I recently found out that my mother has been sleeping with my eldest brother since I was like 12. He's a step brother, so it's not THAT bad, but I was raised with him as my actual brother so I feel so disgusted.

I feel doubly ashamed of my mother because my brother's father, her (now ex) second husband, was a horrible man. He was very physically abusive. Her first husband, my father, was a pedophile and he sexually abused me when I was a little girl.

She knows about this, though she once said that she regretted confronting him over the child porn of me that she'd found on his laptop because he tried to strangle her over it and that whole debacle "ruined her chances of getting her degree" since she was in school at the time.

Anyways, she knows that incest is a very sore topic with me and yet she still just casually dropped that bomb on me and got upset when *I* got upset over it. He is coming to visit for the first time in 4 years and the only thing I can think about is how they're probably going to have sex.

I just want to throw up and idk, cry. He doesn't speak to his father anymore because of what he did to my mom (he ALSO tried to kill her, but that was just plain old domestic violence) but he looks just like him, and it hurts me to see him now. This is only the second time since they've gotten divorced that he's come to visit.

His dad was only physically abusive to me, though, so I feel like I shouldn't really complain. Honestly, though my father never hit me, what he did was much worse. The worst thing my step father ever did in that regard was just regular shit, coming in when I was bathing, exposing himself, making me get into the hot tub naked w him, spanking me bare-assed. But he never actually did anything so do I really have room to complain?

Whatever. I'm just rambling now. I'm just so sad. I thought that at least part of my life could be normal and not sexually fucked up but I guess I was wrong. God, I'm so fucking sad.

I'm sorry to hear that all of that happened to you but I do think that you've got the right to complain. Every parental figure which was meant to protect you failed and abused you some way or another.

As for the incest it's a pretty shitty thing all around and it's perfectly understandable why you'd be upset. When can you move out of your house? I honestly believe that you'd be better off not living in an environment that has failed you time and time again.
Definitely move away as far as possible and cut contact.

If you haven't sought any professional help regarding getting therapy for all this abuse you've been subjected to I recommend that you do. If you can't afford it you should look for private charities for abuse victims to see what kind of support they could offer you.

That's a very difficult situation, I'm sorry to hear about that.

First of all, you definitely have a right to be upset about something like this. Step-brother or not, it's still completely natural , feeling completely disgusted by their relationship.
I'd say you try to get past the fact that he looks like his father; it's not going to be easy, since it could be a potential trigger for the abuse you faced.

Also, trust me; while it wasn't AS bad what your father did to you, those types of things are definitely...inappropriate and can easily be defined as abuse. Given that you've already suffered from abuse when you were younger from your OWN father, things like that from your step-father is even further amplified.

You have every right to be upset about this, but at the end of the day it's their relationship and you can't make them stop.However, from what I know, this type of relationship is illegal; I know you might have hesitations reporting them or anything like that, but it's an option.

Personally, the advice I can give is that you seek Professional Therapy for something like this, if you can afford it. As well; how old are you? Can you move out and away from them, perhaps with a friend?

This is the saddest thing I've ever seen.
Please leave. You are not helping.

>last call

>hours in between

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The saddest thing I've ever seen is two people complaining about two bumps which are hours apart so as to not bump spam, whilst bumping that same thread you're complaining about.
If you don't want to participate then just leave, there's no need for being faggots.

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Candles and air fresheners are bad for your lungs. Just like smoke. Masking the smoke doesn't stop it from deteriorating my health.

I meant his behavior change, not the lies.

posted in the wrong thread, but

Get a fan or air conditioning then, only thing that can keep the smoke out while keeping the house cool.

It sounds like she's more than ready to try to make things work out by visiting as often as she can but you're the one flaking on her.
It's up to you my dude, if you don't think she's worth the wait then just move on with your life. But make sure that you're both on the same page.

>she wants to make things work out
she doesn't want to do a ldr though. this makes me think that maybe i'm just an option to her. is that the wrong conclusion?

If that's the case then you're probably right. Wants to keep you around just in case.

Nice to see you guys again. Wasn't on Friday.

Trying to find a good dating site with little to no results. Which is the best to go for?
I acknowledge most if not all of them are bad. Just trying to find the least bad.

Nice to see you to user, as you can see, this thread is still lingering about...

Bumble has the gimmick that the girl chooses who to go for so maybe try that or OkCupid; they're all the same really.