I see pic related floated around and even though it's fair enough, it doesn't go into detail about the effort part. What is one meant to do? What kind of effort am I meant to do to meet people and home at university? University is a bit easier what with all the societies, sports, and making the proactive effort to go to the socials and meet more people but at home it's harder. I know no one down here and am not sure what I am suppose to do. Look up a box club or download a meetup app or something?
>inb4 workout and take care of yourself
I do. Doesn't mean shit falls into your lap sitting at home even if you do weights and shit.
What kind of effort though?
*boxing
You are meant to talk to people and try. You can go up to them on the street, you can go up to them at the library or the grocery store. You can go up to them wherever you think will work (though probably not the bathroom).
Seriously, this isn't rocket surgery.
Lol, what the fuck. You must be from a different country because that's not how things operate in Bongland. You talk to people and make an effort in an environment like a club or something, not fucking randoms in the street. If you do make friends like that, it's a happy accident, not the conventional for making friends.
Step one: pretend that everybody is lonely and or bored and you do them a favor by talking to them about any topic / meme.
Step two: repeat step one with people who reacted positively (replying in whole sentences, positive body language, laught) to your annoying talking.
Thats pretty much it. How many girls have you asked on date this summer?
None because I literally am not in an environment where I'm even surrounded by them. I have no friends at home so don't go to bars or anything. All I do is stay home, work on a university project that will be done by early August, then work on getting a job and maybe go the London with a friend to hit up bars before uni starts. I'll concede I'm, a pussy when it comes to approaching women but the environment has to be conducive to that shit like bars, clubs, and shit, not cold approaching a random fucker in a supermarket.
Change your environment retard
>All I do is stay home
>What kind of effort am I meant to do to meet people
ngmi
You can go to bars, nightclubs and dancing lessons on your own. School campus is dating on tutorial mode
>hi, never seen you here before, are you 1st year? Really? What do you study? I will be future lawyer. Whats your least favorite class? Cool, wanna grab a burger withvme someday?
That's what I'm asking you obtuse, prick. HOW do I do that? Just hit up something like a boxing club or downloading a meetup app? Fucking hell...
>Step two: repeat step one with people who reacted positively (replying in whole sentences, positive body language, laught) to your annoying talking.
> to your annoying talking.
This here is my problem. I don't like being annoying any more than I like being annoyed. The entire idea of just taking up someone's time for no reason is slightly repulsive.
>cold approaching a random fucker in a supermarket.
Is this seriously a thing people do? I've never seen it.
University doesn't concern me. I have a decent gameplan for that. Hit up the societies and sports you're interested in, be proactive and be involved, go to the socials, be sociable and friendly, etc. At home is a different ballpark. I am lost on that front. I'll get a job once a uni project is over and maybe go to London once with a friend from uni but outside of that I am quite lost. I do want to meet people in the 18-24 age bracket too.
Nor have I but the advice flung around here often veers in on that kind of stuff. Maybe they are Americans and don't account for how reserved people are in southern England. Ask someone in a market town for directions and they will politely tell you but simply talking to them doesn't dissolve their guard and make them the most outgoing fucker around practically exchanging phone numbers with you and inviting you out for a drink. And they'd be weirded it out if it was the other way around.
Step 1. be normal and have friends
Step 2. be invited to things
Step 3. I have no idea, because I failed step 1.
Normalfags genuinely cannot figure out the concept of being without externally-supplied opportunity. If they suggest something obviously retarded like "dance classes" or "bookstore", ask them if that's how they meet people and they will either stop replying or act like you're rejecting their sage advice.
The only genuine possibility is 'clubs and bars' for STI-ridden skanks who you have NOTHING in common with and will fail spectacularly around, repeatedly. Just hope they're boozed or drugged up enough not to notice how much of a pathetic retard who doesn't fit in you are. In reality, you'll go to a place and either lose your nerve before going in or immediately after you enter.
So basically, at this point: be Jesus-tier lucky or accept your fate, peasant.
Go to bar, a concert, a yoga studio, talk to people in your classes
Come on dude it’s not rocket science
But what if I have nothing to talk about?
I have no friends or social skills
>distant relatives visited
>close to my age
>we pretty much sat in silence for an hour
You posted porn image. Talk about porn. You will be surprised at some people willingly talking about fetishes and so on.
/pol memes are also failproof.
I'm this guy What do I even say to people?
>bar, concert
People are there with their friends. Am I supposed to interject into their group?
>yoga
I went once. No one talked to each other. There was some people hanging out after the class, but they seemed to know each other. Again, I'm not going to walk up to them and interrupt their conversation
I don't have the social skills to interject and then integrate myself into a random group. And I think it's awkward for people to try do that in the first place
So can you tell us about some times you cold-approached someone at a bar and talked about porn?
I am American. People conversing in public always know each other from elsewhere. I have no idea where the idea that just trying to chat up random people was a good idea came from.
I hate clubs and genuinely do not understand the appeal. Pay to get in, music is too loud and is shit, beer is too expensive(after paying just to get in) and also shit. Why? It's not like you can actually talk to people with hearing damage range music playing.
Bowling alleys might be an option if they're around and that's your thing. Try to find if there are any teams or leagues you can join?
This is just a guess but maybe your inhibitions are really high? You sound very afraid of making mistakes
Tell us about a time you went to a yoga class and inserted yourself into a group of others you didn't know talking
I’ve never done it myself but it’s not impossible. You probably won’t be punished for doing so. Do you study or work? Those are acceptable places to join in on conversations
>I've never done it myself
You don't say!
Again, this is university. That's simple. Outside of uni at home is not. Also, going to a bar alone is weird afaik.
The answer is what ever it takes. The begining is always the hardest because you're starting from scratch. You have to use trial and error. Then as you fail you learn what not to do. You will have a few success, before more failure. However now you can follow your recipe to get back to success faster. Everytime you fall you get back up. This is the effort needed to do anything. It seems easier when you get past it, but even walking takes months of practice.
Again, you can try to talk to people elsewhere. There’s no way around it, you have to talk to people you don’t know very well
Have you ever been to a bar? One time i have witnessed a convo where half of pub of very drunken people very loudly discussed that blacks dont actually have bigger penises than whites and it ended in singling some weird song.
Want socialisation? Leave your basement. You are just doing this >ask them if thats how they meet people
which is just different version of pic related. If you dont want advice and only want to reaffirm your misery, please PLEASE relocate to /r9k and stop clogging adv with post like
>give up just like i did X years ago
This is what you cap off a comment that is preceded by some pointers about what to do. I already threw out two ideas like a boxing club or a meetup app so see if they're good ideas but got no thoughts on that stuff whatsoever.
The bars and clubs I have been to at uni are conducive to meeting people but only really when you already arrive with people. Surely you get singled out as some weirdo if alone and can't really insert yourself into a group if alone. Seriously, work with me here. Let's say I go to a relaxed bar in the city to buy some drinks. All I really envision is sitting by myself, enjoy drinks, and leave.
Understand that everything is weird as fuck. In a bar they give you a bunch of dead things left to rot until it poisons you. You are served in a still melting combination of rocks. You either sit on a dead thing that had no legs until way after death, or rocks melted to look like the dead thing. People wear skins and weaves to protect them from the heat so the use more rocks and some water to make the area cold. People cut parts of their bodies off to conform to identities they already have. Just get weird.
>All I really envision is sitting by myself, enjoy drinks, and leave
Talk to somebody faggot
>Seriously, work with me here
Yeah, how you fuck? Remember, this is southern England. I anticipate a random 'Hi' to a person or group minding their own business as weirding them out.
Then don't say hi to anyone ever again in your life and die alone, virgin. You'll weird people out only if you're some kind of weirdo.
You couldn't give advice that isn't a vague, banal platitude to safe your fucking life, pal.
He hasn't GOT any real advice. There ISN'T any. You meet people through friends you already have, and if that can't happen for any reason then you're fucked for life without the hand of god coming down and giving you a miracle.
In other words, network like a pro at uni cause that's the only place this shit is gonna work.
If you don't know how to talk to people, you need a speech therapist not a Jow Forums sexpert who's going to tell you how to make a friend. There's something wrong with you autist. Get it through your head.
It's an advice thread, idiot. You're meant to go into some degree of depth about the socialising. I asked you outright to work with me. You go into a relaxed bar, you order and drink, and notice a person or group of people and you proceed to do... to do fucking what? Blurt out 'HI! I'm user!'?
Your attitude is completely wrong and you will get nowhere until you fix it. You expect to get a walkthrough of things to do, then just apply them blindly and get a complimentary friend or gf as a prize. IT DOES NOT WORK THAT WAY.
The only way people get good at doing anything, is
1) try, badly
2) fail, make mistakes
3) recognize your mistakes and try avoiding them at next attempt
4) repeat until you get good
Step 3 is crucial. People who fail at life either don't try at all, or skip step 3.
So you suck at talking to people. Okay, then you should talk to all kinds of people until you get good at it and it becomes natural to you. You will make mistakes, it will be weird and embarrassing at times, but it's the only way that works. As for where to meet people, that part is easy. Unless you live in a jungle, there will be all kinds of sports groups, martial arts groups, language courses, tabletop game events (plenty of girls play RPGs around here by the way), improv classes and tons of other hobbies. At all of these you can talk to people. If you are a robot autist, as you seem to be, you will be weird and awkward at first. That is unavoidable, you just have to go through that to get good. Or stay foreveralone. Your choice.
Yes.
So your goal is to make friends, right? How you do that is scan your surrounding environment for something like events or get togethers. If you like board games, go to your local comic shop. If you like hiking, there are plenty of communities that do hiking. Gatherings like these are easier to make friends than a grocery store because they are naturally more social and inviting. Use something like meetup.com to find places like these.
>Step one: pretend that everybody is lonely and or bored and you do them a favor by talking to them about any topic / meme.
>Step two: repeat step one with people who reacted positively (replying in whole sentences, positive body language, laught) to your annoying talking.
Whoever said that 1st: Thank you
I've never used craigslists. Is that worth a look?
How desperate for death are you
Don't know much about the website desu.