Oh boy I sure love being in a relationship. I never thought it's going to be like this

No she is pretty smart, it's just the victim complex

then just tell her she's being insecure and to drop it

No, she's not user. She also appears to have a mental illness.

I told her she was being insecure many times when she starts these rampages, this is far from first time.
Well what can I do

UPDATE:
apparently now she's mad that we don't have 1 thing that we both really love, like same music or show

Holy fuck

Get rid of this bitch

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She's afraid of losing you and doesn't know how to react so she does the only thing she's been so far trained to do - complain like a child.

You need to penetrate her soon and often or find a different woman altogether.

Feed her some bullshit about how you love her because she’s so different from you and that she’s like the side of you that you lack or some shit. Just lie more in general to help her rationalize whatever shes being emotional about.

>She's afraid of losing you
Well she's certainly helping that cause with getting mad over that

We're actually pretty similar it's just that we don't love the same stuff. Like we might both like the same thing but not "love" it, something like that.

This is true from your perspective. From hers' - she wants to raise a reaction because abusive reactions are preferable to being ignored, she probably had a fairly mediocre or neglected upbringing to learn this pattern of behavior.

To build up on this. It seems she's generally a needy person, and this will be a consistent pattern of behavior on her part. If you are not compatible with this behavior - you'll need to look for a different person.

Perhaps it could be alleviated with therapy or some other form of help.

Oh man, this is some high maintenance stuff. Relationships aren’t like this usually so you just got a bad one. But I’m sure you’re not perfect either so might be you as well

Maybe she's just too spoiled? Doesn't have the greatest family.
Is there anyone in this world who is compatible with this type of behavior though?
I have not done anything bad I think, I always respond to her immediately when I can, we always set up our dates only when she can and she has a habit of sometimes saying she just doesn't feel good so no date.
I've even canceled my other plans to see her after a long time because she wasn't home in a week just to have her cancel her coming home from grandparents's place out of town.
Then later when she throws a tantrum about her not being important to me and I mention me canceling my plans for her just to have her cancels she goes "Oh am I supposed to feel bad now? sorry sorry, wow thanks for blaming me really thanks"

Some men are also quite needy, I'm not sure this combination works however and it doesn't particularly concern me.

I cannot thrive in a relationship with a needy woman, so I would simply not attempt to in the first place.

The thing is : unless she WANTS to stop being as needy - nothing will ever change and forcing her to change will not work either. Familial history can account for her behavior perhaps, but the question is : what do YOU do now that you find yourself in this situation?

No idea what to do, this is my first relationship

Don't wash your hands kek
Dump that passive aggressive bitch asap you really want a wife like that?

You should find someone else. Given the additional information you provided I think she's a pretty poor person.

Also, do not cancel your plans if the other person isn't willing to do the same for you. She's behaving poorly but you are enabling her in a way - don't enable bad behavior, it will only perpetuate, have standards and maintain them.

>wow thanks for blaming me really thanks

ABORT.

Every guy is different, but I can not deal with this kind of selfish and manipulative bullshit; I got enough of that from others and will not allow any more in my life.

I would break up with her and just say that you aren't compatible.

Lmao run

Why on Earth are you with this fucking drama queen

Beats me dude, no one else has ever given me a chance

I'm going through this myself OP. I'm actually about leave my girl cause this bitch thinks working on yourself means the relationship has to suffer. Fuck that, I can go be with a bitch whose excited about her man rather than one who wants to push him to the side

This, my girl does the same. Instead of her taking a step back, she dives headfirst and makes me wanna try even less.

I know she genuinely likes me but sometimes it feels like she just wants a pet, doesn't consider my feelings and takes me for granted. Good luck, I have no idea what I'm going to do.

That's pretty fucked. Should I break up with my chick? She does this and had a bad upbringing so should I just jump ship now? We broke up once and got back together but like OP's girl, she started acting like miss independent all of a sudden and I'm not for a chick who cant act like shes in a relationship

Not OP but my girl goes to therapy. But she acts like she doesnt have to practice that shit outside the office

Dump her.

Not OP, but question. I've actually addressed my issues with my girl acting like this and I told her and called her on it, she said that I just need to be patient with her growth. As bullshit as that sounds, how much time should I give this bitch? It's been a month since she spouted this shit and I'm seeing no changes, however I'm always willing to give benefit of doubt. But everyday I'm falling more and more out of love with her.

Everyone does that, therapy is useless you just do it enough and pray it sticks

THERAPY DOES NOT HELP

Ok she is being psycho but you’re being rude and not giving context.

Did you like promise to watch something with her and back out of it?
Have you been playing video games all day and ignoring her?

I hate when people barrage texts like that but we need some more context here

Minutes before that she said we'll watch something that night, I just said sure let's watch tonight but I can't right now.
Instead of saying "I didn't mean now" I got this

Hmm yeah.
Sorry op, she just sounds like a psycho.

I think it’s good you put your foot down. It’s “playing the bad guy” in a way but honestly she’ll never grow and learn that this type of thing is unacceptable if you always give her attention for it. I think you made the right call.

I will say- usually this type of instability is related to something. Is she a really self conscious person? Does she not have friends? Does she not have a good relationship with her family?

She's probably the most insecure person I know, she has no friends, maybe a few but not close, her parents are terrible

I hate to break it to you - although it looks like a lot of people in this thread have - but she seems pretty ill-fitted for a relation: insecure, passive-aggressive, and all these "psycho" behaviors. Even desiring the two of you to have a "favorite thing" in common can be construed as a desire for mirroring, which is an unhealthy tendency that you see in people with personality disorders. She's also canceling plans to manipulate you into a position of being the "neglectful" boyfriend. I would walk away from this if you can. Running would be better. She sounds mentally ill at worst and you cannot help her, only she can help herself.

I've been told that a lot in this thread. Guess only these kinds of people ever like or have a crush on me
First person to ever like me is like this

You responded perfectly. Don't talk to her until tomorrow.

Depends, American does, European hardly. Maybe like in Germany or UK but you ain't getting much mental help in fucking Albania or something I'm telling you that much.
Maybe unfair to put Albania as an example they would just stone you.

She did message me later through out the day, I guess we're fine now? I don't know, this happens too frequently

She's PMSing. You should go over and hatefuck her to calm her down, you will both feel better

Just talk her down. Explain that you're human and that you need time to yourself.
Slamming the door shut with your first response to this bullshit isn't a great idea. Patience is your best friend when dealing with an overreacting female. I know this because I have to work with them. You just ask them what's getting them, let them get it off of their chests, and then they apologize and go back to being giggly girls.

amen to that, brother

same thing happened to me.
was madly in love with her like you cannot imagine, and was trying to give her the "time to change" that she always wanted.
ended up cucking me after 5 years together and i left her sordid two-faced ass.

same guy as first reply to your post.
my advice: don't let yourself become a victim. i'm not saying you will, but you MUST be sure that you can trust her.
this goes far beyond thinking you can, but actually feeling with every fiber of yourself that you can. if not, then work towards that end. if working towards that end proves uneventful, then it's your call to make.
it still hurts like a bitch when i think of her and what i thought was true love but hey, know that you're better than that.

>wanting things in common is a sign of a personality disorder
so much tism
nice communication skills

not that guy but set the rules straight or jump ship.

OP fucking slammed this bitch hard, this is so based

There's a difference between wanting things in common with your SO and being "mad" that you don't have something in common, on top of all this other shit. Not 'tism.
>First person to ever like me is like this
Same. It's okay. You deserve better than this shit.

Thank you user for kind words, you too.

oh when that happens you're just supposed to say
>What's wrong?
then your response after that can be whatever. Even nothing. Just show her that you indeed notice that her behavior right now,is unlike her usual self.

like
>*acts different than usual*
>Hey honey you're acting different than usual

gaslighting, dump her

Dude, if your keeping her around for the pussy then i can understand. But the way she talks makes me question if she is wife material so..you better be young or hung lmao

stop looking for partners in your local highschool and you'll be set

Why are you dating her at all? To get sex?

Sounds like you are the problem.