How dumb is it to date someone who isn't really your ideal? I'm talking to this Asian girl right now. She's cute...

How dumb is it to date someone who isn't really your ideal? I'm talking to this Asian girl right now. She's cute, she's cool, but I'm normally into redheads and blondes. I guess I'm just worried I'll be missing out and eventually will be distracted by other girls.

This has nothing to do with race in particular, just that I'm older and I feel like any relationship I hop into is now one I have to consider being "the one." Pic is not her.

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If your ideal has basis in hair color I think you'll end up in poor places regardless. If you're into white women for the more relevant racial characteristics - you should stick to those.

You could just do dress up or ask her to wear a wig or something of that sort if you want to introduce sexual diversity down the line.

Lol 99% of people aren't with their ideal. They're just sticking with what they could get and making the rest up as they go.

You'll eventually love her when you stay longer together

Don't knock it till you try it. You might be surprised. Maybe she's the one personality-wise

It's not just hair color, it's an overall thing. Eye color, hair, etc. I mean I don't focus enough on race to even know what else you would mean by "relevant racial characteristics."

I'd rather be alone than "stick with what I could get." There is absolutely zero point in being with someone for the sake of being with someone. There's also a difference between "ideal" and someone that fits a good amount of things you like. I know I'm not gonna get Taylor Swift, but it's not out of the real of possibility to get a thin blonde.

This is a horrible argument.

That's what part of me thinks, I guess. But I also don't really know the ideal personality. Like, everyone has some good and some bad, I can't see myself with someone based on personality alone. Even my best friends have flaws and would present challenges living with.

You don't need to go into detail. But the basic gist is that asian women behave like asian women, white women behave like white women.

Obviously there's individual variation, but there's also generalized realities.

I like asian women aesthetically, but with my understanding of how relationships work in asian cultures - I wouldn't be interested.

Have sex and find out for yourself

Have sex and find out

Ah, gotcha. Yeah, I'm not as far as thinking about cultural impact or those differences.

For now, this is really just an aesthetic question. And I know, I know, looks change, yadda yadda yadda, but wanting someone else is something that derailed a previous relationship of mine and I'd rather not put someone through that again.

I have had sex with Asian women before. This isn't a question of whether or not I find her attractive, I do.

Don't do it user. She will find out you prefer blondes/redheads and she will become insecure and neurotic over it. It'll be a major sticking point for her and she will privately dwell on it. Stick with your preferences.

t. Girl who dated someone with preferences that didn't match me

Thanks for this. I don't think my buddies would ever intentionally try to call me out and make it apparent, but just about everyone I know decently well can identify a girl that is "my type." It's kind of a running joke about how the girls I'm into always practically look like they could be related.

It sounds like you’re close to making your mind up based on your replies. If you’re really against compromise and you think this won’t end well, look for someone else

Don't listen to the idiots in this thread. Personality has nothing to do with race, it's all about the environment you live in. And if you live with someone for a few years, your personalities will blend. The more time together, the stronger the similarities. You'll then have a partner who has a lot of similar experiences as you, and can relate to your way of thinking on a much deeper level than anyone else. You can confide in them, and they will understand your point of view. This is why having a life partner is so important, it stabilizes you and allows you to check your thoughts and feelings against someone similar. Relationships are built, as are personalities. Someone you enjoy time with is your ideal already, there's no such thing as a 100% match because that requires time together to achieve.

Drop a (You) if you liked this post

I'm actually more leaning towards doing it because I've been having a bad run of it with the ladies recently. But trying to be sensible about the whole thing and kinda play devils advocate to myself.

I have respect for what you're saying, but I feel like that's incredibly optimistic compared to what relationships are really like for most people, deeply seeded in insecurities and jealousy.

Well people have their priorities wrong regarding the purpose of a relationship. If you treat your significant other as your partner and not your parent, you'll have a much better time. Blame social media and traditional media for putting the wrong priorities in people's head. A disagreement shouldnt lead to a fight. And a fight shouldn't lead to irreversible words and actions. It's about communication brother

>Asian girl
Don't. Dating one is a sure sign that you're a beta cuck, despite what the loser weebs here tell you. If you have an ideal, try shooting for it instead of settling with a low-tier girl. Besides, most other girls wouldn't want you if you date one, there's a stigma against asian fetishists for a reason.

I can tell a woman wrote this post.

Men aren't women, they need to date as many as they can and learn since women don't exactly approach them

This raises a great question

You should fuck her until something better comes along

Or until she’s too much of a pain in the ass

Ignore this post I have never heard that from anyone, ever, lol

I'm about to be 33. I would normally agree with "fuck her until something better," but I'm getting older and I can't just fuck if I want a relationship/marriage/kids.

If I'm just gonna fuck, it's time to accept I'm not having children and will be an eternal bachelor. Which is fine, but that's where I am.

I can tell a jealous white woman wrote this

sounds like you aren't all that interested or attracted to her. I'd say go out with her for fun but don't ask her to be your gf obviously

not that user but even my weeb friend doesn't date asian women because he's "not that beta" kek

Since when are racial preferences beta or fetishes? only insecure people namecall people who date different races and ethnicities

But since your friend is a weeb he is already a beta

that's called being an adult

I don't understand this. What is? Dating someone who isn't your type?

accepting that your type is just a preference and doesn't make or break a relationship

Roastie getting toastie