Should you pay for a woman's drink/coffee/snacks etc. on the first date?
Yesterday I approached a woman in the street and then we had an instant date, but it was her initiative to go for a drink and she hadn't shown any clear interest besides wanting to have the instant date, so I didn't pay for the expensive cocktail she chose. Then she didn't even drink it other than a few sips. The date was boring as fuck. I don't know what she was thinking and feeling during the course of the date but when I offered to buy her a beer later on and she refused I just walked out of there.

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Then I have a date with another woman today. With this woman I was the one to suggest to go for a coffee so maybe I should pay for her coffee? But I hesitate to pay for anything other than a cup of coffee because she hasn't really shown any interest other than agreeing to meet today and I think she's probably a gold digger because her last words were if I study here or something. Then she said we would meet for no longer than one hour because she was busy, then I changed the day and then she said no longer than two hours because we didn't know each other, then I changed back to today. But I know from experience "we don't know each other yet" usually means she has not yet heard what I do for a living. I will lie about my job because I have a crap job. She's leaving my country soon anyway, although she might be looking for a boyfriend/husband here anyway. Plus she's fucking busy with like 4 other people she's scheduled to meet this week or something like that, and I don't know if they're guys or what. She said she got approached by another guy the day before I approached her and was freaked out by it and it's not normal in her country and yada yada. Maybe I'll just get a coffee for myself and her, meaning nothing other than a coffee for myself, because if I get a cake or something for myself it might be expected to get something for her too? And chances are she's only interested in what I do and will see through my lie and that's the end of our relationship, so I don't think I should pay for anything more than one cup of coffee. Or what are your thoughts?
I don't know why the bitch yesterday was so fucking boring, maybe she didn't believe my lie about my job.

What’s your fake job line and what country do you live in ?


And when I said we would meet today and then maybe again on Thursday she said "okayyy". What does that mean? (three y's)

Jesus. How about you just stop with this thread. This shit is turning into some rocket science formula algorithm. TLDR. You literally fucking dissect this shit too much. No wonder nobody wants to do more than an hour with you.

I’m just curious because you tell an interesting story. There are no hard and fast rules when it comes to bill splitting but if it’s just a coffee offer to split it and if that offends her then whatever. If she’s ordering expensive cocktails on a blind date and you’re not filthy rich then be done with it. Use common sense and trendier girls in general will want to pay their own way out of some principle of independence.

Chances are she will go sit at a table when I go to order. But you think I should pay for my own coffee only even though it was my initiative to have a coffee?

I clean and refuel buses but I said I'm a bus mechanic. She then asked if I have an engineer education, and I said yes. Today I will probably say I'm an engineer.

If you ask friends to have a beer together, do you pay their first beer?

I'm from Sweden and both the bitch yesterday and the woman today are from Korea.

I don't have friends

>Asian women

If you asked her for coffee then pay for the both of you, it’s only coffee. Did you meet these girls on dating apps or just by approaching them?

Learn to read fuckface. I already said I approached the woman yesterday in the street. The woman I'm meeting today was also in the street.

How do you do it?

I just walked up to them. First one was looking in the window of a store. I walked up and said something about the items in the window. The other I walked up beside her and walked with her and asked if she spoke Swedish. She did speak a little Swedish even though she doesn't live here, I kept talking about that.

In my opinion the person who asks the other on a date should pay for the consumation. Most of the time it's the guy who does the asking out, so yeah.

My current gf asked me out to a movie (our first date) and she bought the tickets. I asked her how much it was so I could pay for mine, but she told me not to worry as it was her treat. After movie I suggested we go out for a drink and of course I paid for all of it. Now it really depends where you live, what are the expectations between men and women on dates etc. Here you are not expected to pay for everything as a man, but pretty much all women appreciate if you pay on the first date and give them the occasional flowers and gift. I was already planning on taking her out to drinks after and to pay, so that's why I didn't insist on paying for my movie ticket too. A balance like this is the best idea in a "western" society in my opinion. Let her pay sometimes, but most of the time it's better if you do it. If you're in some Asian country you're shit out of luck unfortunately, from what I understand women there expect to be pampered and provided for all the time.


>Yesterday I approached a woman in the street and then we had an instant date

She thought you were into her, so she wanted to test the limits to which you were willing to buy her things in order to curry her favor.

Calling it an "instant date" is a really cute euphemism, tho.

You came onto some lady, and she was into it, and it sounds like you might have been able to just buy her a bunch of drinks and have sex, which is what she assumed you wanted, but then when you backed out of that, she was nonplussed, because that's all she expected from it, so you actually come out like an asshole in this equation, and there's nothing you can do about it.

It wasn't a date. She wasn't looking for a relationship.

You must be a decent-looking fellow, though, because that happened, so don't worry about it.

In general though, yes. You are expected to pay for the women you randomly pick up and hope to have sex with, because we live in a patriarchy and you have a penis.

Maybe someday things will be different.

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Asian women are actually some of the most materialistic on the planet

If I'm taking someone out I always offer to pay. I enjoy their company and it's just a nice thing to do.

And Maldavian women are actually some of the most arachnophobic on the planet.

This is fun; who's next?

Literally over a fifth of all women on the planet are Asian, you sperg.

South american women are actually some of the most disloyal on the planet

It's in their culture desu
Ever seen Asians at parks not even looking around and just basically taking pictures of themselves? They get peer pressured by their parents and peers into more than just education it goes into looks and social media as well as their financial life as well

This is where you need to be able to connect with the person I guess, you said you couldn’t tell why they were doing those things, so why waste your time with them?
If you buy a game and can’t figure it out, no matter how hard you try, do you keep going, or do you just play something else?

>Should you pay for a woman's drink/coffee/snacks etc. on the first date?
It's really up to your preference.
There's some psychology to it, but it changes radically with whatever culture the date is taking place in.
I've lived in America all my life, but I've lived all over the place within it.
Dating culture is very different just state-to-state, so if you're in another country it's going to be an even bigger difference.

That said, money is the cheapest thing you can invest into another person so I generally consider it worth it.

Only if she's attractive lol im serious paying for her is an investment if she looks like good wife material

You fucked up because you're cheap and she knew it.

If you're asking someone to go somewhere I think you should pay because they're taking time out of their day to meet with you. Though at some point I think it's fine to ask for them to pay their own half, especially if you keep meeting and enjoy the time spent together.

>Ever seen Asians at parks not even looking around and just basically taking pictures of themselves?

Are you literally retarded or do you think that everyone who does this is Asian?

Like, I live in Southern California. EVERYBODY IS DOING THIS ALL THE TIME.

Regardless of race, creed, color, or gender.

God bless America.

No, I'm not cheap, I could have paid 21 usd for her drink and snack but some say you shouldn't plus it was her initiative to go for a drink. Plus in the past I've payed for drinks and then got no sex and I've not payed for her and gotten sex.

What kind of message does it send to a girl if you’re not even willing to pay for her drink? It makes you look cheap as hell, and eliminates basically any possibility that she’ll have sex with you.

She’s not guaranteed to have sex with you if you pay for her drink but it definitely wouldn’t happen if you don’t offer to pay.

See how the date goes. If it’s good then pay for the drink at the end. If you feel like she isn’t in to it and wont want to go on another date then don’t.

There are those who say you show lower value by paying retard

Whoever asks should pay. I would say not to offer otherwise because it shows weakness and can even put pressure on the girl because now she "owes" you. Plus it can lead you to being taken advantage of

>Should you pay for a woman's drink/coffee/snacks etc
And people say chivalry isn't dead.

i agree with the whole “whoever asks the other on a date should pay” thing. as a woman myself they can be assholes and take advantage of dudes for shit. so yeah just be careful who you’re going on dates with in the first place

The voices in your head maybe

>Should you pay for a woman's drink/coffee/snacks etc. on the first date?
desu you should pay if you're the one who asked to go.

do not spend money on a woman until you have fucked her. after that point, rotate between 1 person paying, splitting, or 1 pays and 1 tips