Am I signing myself up for misfortune by falling in love with a girl with physical chronic illnesses? And mental, to a small extent. She has small fits of anxiety, and she's pretty shy, but she always says she doesn't take me for granted and how grateful she is for me being open to her. I think I'm her only friend, and I'm seriously starting to think more intimately about her. I just don't know what'll happen down the line if I do follow this path. I'm 23, she's 21.
Am I signing myself up for misfortune by falling in love with a girl with physical chronic illnesses? And mental...
Or talk her into signing her up for life insurance.
Diagnosed clinical anxiety or just a little nervousness/emotionalness from time to time?
Physical illness is no big deal compared to mental illness. There may be medical bills that make your finances difficult, and you may need to worry about an early death from her if it's that kind of illness, but if it's just something stupid like "needs a wheelchair" or "has to take insulin shots" why not?
I wouldn't worry about it too much, user. Relationships are hard enough to maintain as it is. You could be her hero for life or just some guy she dated for a brief period of time. Don't consider her illness in this situation, if you want to be with her because of her personality and looks (is she cute?) then just go for it. Don't treat this relationship that differently than you would with any other potential relationship just because of her having an illness. It doesn't define her.
i came to post pretty much this but the way you describe her makes me wanna hug her and like, bring her some hot chocolate and cover her with a blanket and put some videos in the tv for her to have fun
Not sure about being diagnosed, but she has moments where she ghosts me for about a month, then comes back explaining she had another "depression" phase. Don't know how legit it is, but I give her space when she needs it. Her illness is a bit more serious, regarding stomach problems.
She's cute, Polish/Japanese. Knew her since middle school, but only started actually talking to her in college. I'll definitely take that last part you said into consideration, thanks user.
this is too fucking cute to be true
Just how well do you know her anyway? Are you actually dating in person?
Don't worry about "falling in love" until you're pretty far down the line, it's okay to date experimentally and make mistakes, that's what dating is about.
It's cute on paper but life isn't like your gook cartoons. Things like this are tough to consider and OP isn't obligated morally to potentially give his youthful days to a woman who simply might not be there going on into the future.
If OP decided to not take the plunge and keep distance from her I wouldn't blame him at all. And I'm this user here
>It's cute on paper but life isn't like your gook cartoons. Things like this are tough to consider and OP isn't obligated morally to potentially give his youthful days to a woman who simply might not be there going on into the future.
those are some hell of assumptions by out of a simple statement
I wasn't implying you thought that whole second part of my post there. I'm just trying to illustrate what his conundrum actually is.
I know her pretty well, we have similar interests. Confessed to her already, she also likes me, but we never really "dated," unless you wanna just call casual hangouts dating. I'm still an incel, believe it or not, asking Jow Forums and shit, so it's not all roses. I don't even know what to do in a date aside from going to movies and talking. Not that she would want to go outside the house anyways.
I already met her parents, but I never really asked about anything. I think I'm still a bit young for me to be thinking about the future already, like you said; wait until I'm further down the line, so I might just be delusional right now.
OP should consider what I'm about to say honestly. Don't read this OP.
Whether he leaves in a few months or a few years, whether it's because of her illness or something, she will always think that it was because of her illness (if it's really that debilitating). But again, I don't want OP to consider her feelings too much because it's not his obligation. So he should just go in experimentally.
Well I cocked that up royally.
You don't have to answer for me, user. I skimmed over it but I kind of forgot now, fortunately. A bit tired
Going to movies is a terrible date option btw, especially as a first date. If you want to see a movie watch Netflix on your couch where you can make out in privacy.
If you go to a public theater on a first date, you will not be kissing in the dark and there will be no time to talk or get to know one another. Plus you will probably get out so late it's time for the date to end already. Because there is so little social interaction, the movies are possibly the worst first date option available, even worse than meme options like "take her grocery shopping".
Reliable first dates:
These are slam dunks.
*You might say to yourself, fireworks? Isn't that the same as a movie? No. No one cares if you talk during fireworks, and you're spread out on a blanket on the ground, way more intimate.
Also wtf are you doing?
>Confessed you like her
>She likes you back
>Didn't start dating
She might think you have brain problems user. She TOLD YOU SHE LIKES YOU.
How often do you see a fireworks show? If OP isn't in burgerland this would be extremely inconvenient.
This, honestly. OP is a faggot and needs to get his shit together. Lace up and fucking choose nerd.
>How often do you see a fireworks show?
My city does them every single Friday night. Because fireworks are a badass way to date women, I have suspected for years now that this is a city council scheme to increase the population.
Yes, this is in burgerland, yes, I realize most cities don't have this. But if you can get one, man they're great.
[spoiler]So I can find you and rape you?
Right. I should just ask if she wants to kiss next time or something. The reason why I didnt really do anything though, her health complications. I probably am a faggot for blocking myself off like that, but only because I kept thinking about stuff like settling down, which is probably even more faggotry, considering where I am in life right now. Your "It doesn't define her" post kinda changed my way of thinking though. I'll think over this.
>she ghosts me for about a month
That alone is enough for me to end it.