Is Tinder worth it at all for average men?
Is Tinder worth it at all for average men?
Not really but you can win if you don't play.
Depends on what you consider as worth and what you consider as average.
Fuck no brother!!! It single-handedly ruined my life. It's for guys who wear Yeezy 350 Boost, fake woke, social media-oriented, a douchebag, and listen to Travis Scott and Drake. If you don't fit the description then its a no go senpai.
If you are looking for hookups then obviously, since getting them from tinder is so easy.
You have to be pretty good looking to pull off Tinder. You need to both have your looks and openers on point because people on Tinder are ruthless and it's really easy to just unmatch/swipe left anyone.
I've never had any success in Tinder but I have had two girlfriends. If you're like me and you are better in real life and have a hard time communicating over the internet you're going to struggle.
It is also a very female dominated site because most men just swipe right so matches are usually held by the females.
>You have to be pretty good looking to pull off Tinder
Not really. My 5/10 fatty friend gets a new girl every other week.
>Make Tinder account
>In two weeks actually get girl like my Tinder profile
>She writes me first "Hi, user"
>"Hi. How're you doing?"
No, it isn't.
He must be smooth as hell and know how to take pictures of himself. Personally I struggle with talking to new people and my pictures are just average.
Most of my friends are the same and they're also regular people.
I am trying to be more of a normie, will that give me girls?
I feel so conflicted as a 19-year-old virgin man. Am I just better off getting a prostitute if I don't have any pictures of myself outside? I reckon it would be weird to ask strangers to take some at the park also.
He simply tries with every single girl without filtering and with zero fear of rejection. Probably sends 20 or 30 messages every day, and eventually one answers.
>Am I just better off getting a prostitute
Don't. You'll regret it.
t. lost my virginity to a prostitute last week.
Why did you regret it and how old are you? I've been fantasizing about getting one for one year now, so she could fulfill my fetishes too.
>19-year-old virgin man
That's still well into normal parameters. The conflict is solely un your head.
I'm 24. Sex is supposed to be with a person you love and trust. She was a complete stranger and I felt jack shit. I was just having my dick sucked and put it in a vagina. I didn't like it at all. BUT I got an experience of intimacy with a woman, and I think it helped me with a mental barrier (I'm very shy).
Maybe you'd have a whole lot different experience, but that's how I felt about it.
The worst part of tinder for me was realizing how fucking old I am. I'm 26 and like 80% of the people I see in Tinder are
I'm almost 10 years older than you and get plenty of matches of all ages.
Must be because of the country, but still it sucks to get matched with some 19 year old girl and have to unmatch
Why the fuck would you unmatch
Or your profile is just boring.
Because a 7 year gap is way too much? I mean I'm considering whether to buy a house and that girl is still thinking about what college to go to. We're in completely different parts of our lives.
user you're overthinking this most people use tinder for sex only. It doesn't matter at which point in her life she is at if you just fuck with her once and be done with.
Not that guys but I'm 22 and am thinking of going abroad to lose my virginity. I don't want intimacy, romance, or anything like that. I hardly view females as human and just want to experience sex so I can move on with my life. I'm torn between doing this or continuing towards wizardhood. If I rent the whore I'll be engaging in degeneracy for little reason and spending a bunch of money. If I don't I'll probably struggle with sexual frustration until my libido dies off in my 30s.
You are gay
Anyone got any openers or conversations that have some degree of success?
Let me suck the stress out of your titties
On tinder? You can't send a message unless they swipe right. How does he get 30 matches a day?
I guess that is my mistake, I'm on tinder for something more.
This has been proven to work
I just matched with this super cute girl who says she liked memes, what do I open with? I was going to try a "Did you know" stupid fact.
I want to feed you sushi and slap your ass after watching a movie
I don't know, I've never seen his profile. The dude is as average as it gets.
Not him but you should listen to him, I did the same thing you wanted to do and it sucked, you only really enjoy it with a person you really love, I've had a girlfriend but we never did anything because she was very shy about that and was very catholic.
I saw the messages my mate sends to girls over tinder and its the most forced, cringe shit ever but it works often
I am quite a stoic serious guy and cannot fake that type of playful communitcation over texts
Stop thinking it's so terrible being a virgin at 19, it's really not. More people are virgins at our age than you think, it's just somebody hides because they're ashamed of it for some reason but really nobody cares.
Only virgins care about them being virgins.
Please give me at least one honest advice, what do I say to girls once a match is made?
"Hi, how are you?" is my intuitive line but it's awful. I would hate it if I received that opener since it's so vague and leaves not much room for conversation.
Then I think about what kind of opener I would want. Well, I would like if a girl just straight out invited me for a drink or a burger. Maybe I should do that with women I match up with. Of course, after this I realize that women are different. They would have no reason to take me up on my invite. Also, a man instantly inviting a girl would just sound desperate, it's not the same when a woman does it.
In other words, what works for me probably wouldn't work for girls, so I have no idea what to say.
For the record here are other things I have tried. Commenting on something in their photos or profile. It's the most suggested thing to do in online articles but let's be honest, they probably hear that same compliment all the time, and what value is a compliment made by a stranger on Tinder? You just know everyone is complimenting each other in hopes of fucking.
The opener is not necessarily the hardest part though. Once a match is made the conversation will just flow awkwardly, at least with me. The girl will ask what I do, I'll say I'm in college and also work in a certain place. Then I ask her what she does, and she will answer she is in college too most likely. Now if this was a conversation and we were acquaintances or friends I could prod more about her college life, ask if she is liking it and so on, but in Tinder that sort of talk just feels pointless. Maybe we can have that talk up personal, but not through Tinder. I am 1 among hundreds of men she matched up shit, so it's obvious that she has no interest in telling me about her personal life in details.Thing is, I just don't know what is relevant to be said through Tinder.
If I could make my own dating platform, it would be a platform where you get to make five questions to the other person. They make five questions to you too. After that you choose if you want to set a date or not. If you click "no" the match ends, simple as that.
But back to the topic, what do you anons usually say to land something solid with Tinder matches? How do you keep them entertained, what do you talk about?
If you're attractive - say anything.
If you're unattractive - ask for advice from other unattractive people.
I just say off the wall shit, but that is relevant to my personality so it's not forced. Just be yourself, as long as yourself doesn't suck.
By the way, I don't have or use tinder, but I've been inside of a woman many times.
>If you're unattractive - ask for advice from other unattractive people.
That's what I am doing right now
To no degree of success since said unattractive people don't feel like replying, maybe because they have had no success themselves.
Attractiveness is subjective.
Different people feel attracted to different things. It's like a bell curve. There's a tendency but there's also many exceptions.
There's great objectivity to attraction : symmetry is most obvious, good skin and so forth.
You're not going to help ugly people by telling them that someone "might" find them attractive. Cope in a way that does not deny reality.
What's a good opener on Tinder?
hey baby you ever have your asshole licked by a fat man in an overcoat?
She unmatched me :(
Assertions are not proof. Try again
We are probably attracted to different things
That's an anecdote for both you and me, so you know from that I am right (because one single example is enough to demolish your statement, considering its absolute nature)
>Hovering constantly around 15-20 likes
>15 matches in a week or so
>aired by everyone I actually message, bar one who I’m having a good convo with
>shitty suicide attempt wastes two days after we match
>we both leave for holidays the next day so no meet up for the next two weeks
Fuck me, right? It’s an unfunny joke at this point.
Why are you looking for relationships if you are that broken yourself? Are you trying to make a girl fill the void?
Man, that’s a conversation I really can’t be arsed to get into as I’m gonna slep.
But yeah it has, in part at least, to do with the fact I haven’t had a proper human connection for about 5/6 years
user, girls are not depression cures. Much the opposite, they will usually make you depressed and absolutely destroy your week. It is tempting to think that you are depressed because of lack of human contact but that's because society conditions you to overvalue sex and relationships. There is no harm in finding a girl experiencing the emotional rollercoaster first-hand, I'm just trying to get you to understand that your suicidal behavior will be a major redflag to other girls. Try hiding your condition from whatever girl you match with. Never appear weak to girls, at least not during you first contacts with them. Showing weakness is only cute once you two already have something going for a long time. Most importantly, keep seeking medical help on the side. Please don't postpone therapy and medication while thinking that a girl will suffice.
Furthermore, it's just a Tinder match. You'll get many others like her on the long run, and you can experiment with different lines and openers until you find something that works, so don't worry if things don't work out with that one girl. I say this because I worry you could make another attempt for your life if things didn't go smoothly with that specific girl, and that would be catastrophic since you could easily find another girl similar to her if you just looked more in Tinder or similar dating platforms.
Might as well go to prostitutes and expect "something more". Fucking christ
Just work on having good pictures and not being desperate. Almost anything you say will work if those conditions hold.
Guys who wear all black and are actually addicted to drugs can get laid on tinder as well
At least you tried. Now you know that girls don't like that.
>two months in, 0 matches
deleted last week, it's painful af to realize you're too ugly for tinder
Are you not going to meet her in spain? That's too big a coincidence to not meet up imo.
Do you have advice for how to have good Tinder photos them? Some basic environments/poses that can't go wrong?
What does he say?
Say, “I bet you taste like coins and milk”
Looks OP. Seriously if you can find a good angle for your face and you look good, then you're set. Do not open a fucking convo with just hey or anything like that, fuck that hit her with a pick up line. However though the tip I give you about how angles can make anyone look good, it applies to girls too don't act surprised when you meet up with a girl and she looks different from her profile photo. If you seriously want to be guaranteed, light Photoshop on your face that is not obivous. For me I just made my lips a bit smaller since they were some what big in the photo.
Another thread invaded by gay psyops.
>Is Tinder worth it
It was probably the grammar.
Spain is not just a small town though
My first message to the girl that I've been in a relationship with for a year was "You have a nice face. Can I wear it?".
I would but we’re about 400 km away from each other
Minimal time and effort invested. Minimal risk. Possible reward. Definitely worth it.
It takes about 10 mins to set up and literally 5 mins of swiping whenever you're bored. The worst that happens is you get no matches.
If you're like me and don't have any good photos of yourself it takes a lot of effort to make a good profile.
Tbh I personally think tinder is a waste of time and the app just feels really weird to me.
Idk man. I'm fugly and not photogenic and I could still dig up a few good photos. And even if you don't, you could get all the photos you need in a couple hours.
Don't women avoid swiping on guys that don't have photos of them with friends, engaged in hobbies, and conventionally attractive selfies?
I don't have a lot of friends and we don't do much in the way of social stuff. You say "can get all you need in a few hours" but that's not true for everyone.
I think it takes a special kind of person to be good at tinder, particularly people who spend a lot of time on social media. For me I don't know what photos are good.
>person to be good at tinder,
>make new tinder profile, with only one really good picture.
>get 18 likes, and 6 matches
>speak to all of them, none of them reply.
which takes me to this conclusion, and i've held this for a while. women mostly use tinder for self-gratification, it must stoke their ego's to know they get attention.
pretty self deprecating if you ask me
For one there's no such thing as a Chad but also social media is extremely different to real life interaction
Start with the basics. I've never heard of women not swiping right on guys with no group photos. It's not *that* critical anyways. As for not doing anything social, you just gotta larp. Dress up nice, go somewhere, and get your friend to take a few photos. Go hiking and nake a day out of it.
For one of my friends, when we set up his tinder account, there were 7 of us hanging out. We literally faked photos of him at 4 different parties. One of them he was playing the drums, second one passed out drunk. 3rd one with the two females in the friend group. All done in the span of an hour and a half.
Frankly, you're only going to be good at Tinder if you are 9/10, photogenic, social, etc etc etc. But, like it says in any (((PUA))) guide, it's a numbers game. Swipe right enough times and you'll match with somebody. And the time/energy investment is so low, that you don't need a huge ROI for tinder to be worth it.
>For one of my friends, when we set up his tinder account, there were 7 of us hanging out. We literally faked photos of him at 4 different parties. One of them he was playing the drums, second one passed out drunk. 3rd one with the two females in the friend group. All done in the span of an hour and a half.
Thanks, but you only proved my point.
I only have 3 friends, 2 of them are in different states, and none are female.
Right, so maybe start by working on that. Frankly, I think it's important to have a solid foundation of male friends (2-4) and acquaintances (10-50, depending on how social you are) before you even start chasing girls. And then, once you start chasing girls, follow this logic:
If they are unattractive but fun, add them to your friend group
If they are attractive and you fail, add them to your friend group (if you can). People don't realize this, but if you're in the friend zone, you can use that to your advantage. Not only can you learn to talk to women, you can meet people thru her and you can use her to larp
How do I make friends if I'm a socially retarded 28 year old loser?
I can't imagine anyone wanting to hang around with me.
Do you have a job? Invite a couple coworkers out for drinks.
Go to events. Lectures, speeches, concerts. Even if you go alone, try to talk to people.
Go clubbing with the 1 friend you have in town, you're bound to meet new people.
Join a makerspace or some kind of hobby group.
Go to the gym.
In general, if you start doing interesting shit, it will bring people to you!
For example, on your next vacation, do a 60 mile hike through somewhere interesting. Take pictures, make sure you have proof, etc. Run a bit of a social media account to chronicle your adventure(s). Eventually, if a conversation switches to "how was your week/vacation/weekend etc." You can say "oh, I did a 60 mile hike thru Mount Hubbagugga National Park" or "I went to a Slayer concert" or some shit, and people will be drawn to that. Suddenly, you're not just a boring 28 year old loser, you also do interesting shit.
Being socially retarded absolutely sucks, but it's your own fault for not tackling it during high school and uni. Not only are you going to have to make friends in a more difficult environment, you're gonna have to learn how to talk to people first.
Same user again. I'm signing off for the night, so I thought I'd leave you with a reading list:
-bachelor pad economics by Aaron Clarey. Some of his advice is good overall, and some of it is geared towards a certain lifestyle. He also has a couple videos on the topic of finding friends.
-the game by Neil Strauss. It's a PUA book, so take it with a grain of salt, but at its core, PUA tries to reduce social interaction to a science. Learning some of it might help you.
-how to win friends and influence people by Dale Carnegie. Haven't read it yet, but I'll get to it eventually. Dale Carnegie seems to give good advice.
-influence by Robert cialdini. More of a psychology book, but still helpful in compelling people in some cases.
-12 rules for life by Jordan Peterson. Currently reading it, his ideas seem to be very sound and I quite like the guy, so I wanna believe his advice is good. So far, it's worked for me. It isn't directly about social interaction, but I suggest reading it.
Thanks for taking the time to write all that up.
But you know, at 28, I wonder of it's worth the effort. It's going to take exponentially more work to fix myself than if I were 18, and for what? Maybe by the time I'm 35 I'll be normal? Perhaps found a partner by 40?
By which point the best years will be behind me, my libido will have died off, and I'll be miserable anyway like every middleaged guy I know.
I think maybe I missed my chance for the investment to be justifiable; I'd be throwing good money/time chasing the bad, like some trying to get into bitcoins today.
Maybe I should embrace being a useless chud and join a monastery or something.
It seems like it is bc they still use it at an incredibly high rate compared to any other demographic.
Tinder is a fucking blight upon men.
Text messaging is a fucking terrible way to find a date, that's no way for human interaction.
I honestly feel like online dating was a mistake.
>there's no such thing as a Chad
You're either a delusional chad or a troglodyte in denial.
>I just say off the wall shit
This is my most effective strategy, but i can only use it when i really don't care if they respond .. i think thats part of why they respond, idk shits funky
Every time I read people saying "I don't know how to make friends" in this website, I wonder if any of you have tried going to a church yet.
Churches are the biggest hugbox ever IRL. It's full of people going out of their way to be nice and charitable to each other. Even if you are a fedora I think it's worth for the experience, you'll make good friends there, you don't even need to lie about your lack of faith, just say that you are considering converting but first wants to feel the sense of community Christianity brings. That'll actually make them focus a lot on you since they want you to convert (but to be quite honest I think it'll kill your chances of waifuing someone, at least on the short term)
You'll get very high quality friends out of this, and you also get to make all sorts of useful contacts there (lawyers, doctors, etc)
I’ve had sex with a couple girls off tinder. Both were 2-3/10s and I’d consider myself around a 6-7/10. It’s really not worth it unless you’re a very attractive person who is just horny all the time bc if you’re that attractive irl then you don’t tinder mane. Seriously, don’t use it unless you know that you’re practically chad or you’re down to clown with some ugglies. These are the facts with no bs man I’ve been on that tinder grind for years daily.
I thought about that, but the churches around here are nothing but dying retirees.
It depends on the type of church. Here in my country there are catholics and protestants. The catholics are mostly old people or autistic edgy teenagers, the protestants have more youngs, and they are usually chads or dudebros
For average men? Yes it is. Keep in mind that 20+ year old virgins who never ask girls out are NOT average.
how would they know that through Tinder?
>You'll get very high quality friends out of this,
pedos, homophobes, hypocrites and largely racist hmmm very high quality
I did that for two years and you'll attract the most vapid boring women. Just keep doing what makes you happy and have confidence in it people will admire that and you'll eventually attract somebody that admires the real you not something you're trying to be
It's worth noting that I'm almost positive Tinder sets you up with attractive bots right out of the gate to make you think the app works
There's almost always an initial bump in activity before you sink into the quagmire of next to no matches