Femanon here, so I've been with this guy for a couple of months and he's the stereotypical perfect guy. He's kind, caring, puts me first usually so pretty much what most girls want. But to me I find him too clingy and needy and I've started to resent him for constantly proclaiming his love for me every single day, I don't know why I feel like this because most girls would love someone like him. What's wrong with me?
Femanon here, so I've been with this guy for a couple of months and he's the stereotypical perfect guy. He's kind...
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>clingy, needy and corny
Sounds like he's not perfect, then.
First off, there's nobody who is just perfect, we each like different things, if you don't like that, then he's not for you.
Secondly, you seem to be focusing too much on him being "what any other girl would want", almost as if, your reason for thinking of him as perfect is just because that's you idea of what women usually search for, and not because he has traits that you genuinelly find attractive.
So basically, what's wrong with you is not that you don't like this guy, it's that you think you should for some reason.
Literally no girl wants this.
Most girls do want someone who tends to their every needs and someone who gives them constant attention
No, not really. Everybody wants some time alone, or with other people.
you could just tell him he's being clingy. just straight up say "you don't have to tell me that every day, i already know that." if he's annoying you in any way you need to be honest with him about that.
Trust me, if they want this, they don't want it from their S/O.
>whats wrong with me
Nothing really. Its universal fact that the moment man uses words like love or relationship his gf loses any respect she had before for him.
He is the weird one, not you. Either learn how to live up with it, find a compromise or give his good life lessons and break up. With a bit of luck you will find bf who will never say the word love to you.
How physically attractive is he?
I don't want to make him feel bad or make him feel like I don't like him
There's the problem. If he was 8+/10, him being clingy and needy would feel good. He's giving up the commitment aspect likely too early, being the gatekeeper of that, and that has subconsciously turned you off.
This situaiton won't magically solve itself. You have to do something, at whatever you do, there will be consequences, that's how the world works. Pussying out of it only creates more pain in the long term, you're helping nobody by being like this, certainly not him.
If you don't like what he's doing, tell him.
girls want chad to be like that
if he was a 8+/10 i'd feel the same, i've never been a fan of clingy people
8+/10 Chads aren't clingy by default though because they have other options and wouldn't care about the bitch in the first place.
Guys are tough, if he can't handle something as simple as this then he needs to grow up.
if you can't communicate your feelings with him then your relationship will never be successful
I'm so scared if I ever get a gf I'll be the guy in this situation
sounds a lot like me...heh...
>But to me I find him too clingy and needy and I've started to resent him for constantly proclaiming his love for me every single day, I don't know why I feel like this because most girls would love someone like him. What's wrong with me?
Hypergamy, women want aggressive and violent chads, it's just biology really, you're hard wired to want alpha maled
You'll find that the more women want to fuck a man, the more you'll want him, even if he spanks you in the process
>Hypergamy, women want aggressive and violent chads, it's just biology really, you're hard wired to want alpha maled
You are about as educated in evolutionary biology as my cat is in architecture. Stop using the specter of biology to validate your shitty worldviews, user. You have no clue what you're talking about.
>You are about as educated in evolutionary biology as my cat is in architecture. Stop using the specter of biology to validate your shitty worldviews, user. You have no clue what you're talking about.
>The result was not a generous look at humanity. As demonstrated in this gif, “Ray” was flooded with matches. More than 300 matches in less than 24 hours, and he shared a few of the conversations as well.
So... he’s not perfect then. Solved that mystery
Can you site some examples of his clingy and needy behavior?
He needs constant reassurance that I like him, wants to talk to me every second of the day, won't let go of me when we go on dates. Even when we're out in a restaurant he's trying to hold me, and I'm not a fan of pda
Way too clingy, probably insecure. My ex-gf was like that, at first it was kind of cute but then i felt like a bird put in a cage. She also flipped her shit when i wanted to stay in touch with my female friends. Your gut is telling you this isn't right, and it does the right thing.
break up with him and date me instead!
the pinnacle of men is not going to date some ugly 7/10 when he can pound 10/10 pussy
How many other male friends do you have in your life?
sounds like a lovely dude.
Dont listen to all the virgins on here who have no clue what a woman wants.
My ex bf was also like this and once distance was inbetween us I was the one who ended up being clingy sadly because of my insecurities I broke up with him.
To this day its something I regret the most as he was the person where I could be myself.
But oh well everyone is different.
non, he's not comfortable with me talking to other guys even though he says he's ok with it.
Insecure as fuck. Sorry, abandon ship. Don't make the same mistake tons of people here did.
Is there a guy that you fancy right now that's not your boyfriend? You said he's no comfortable with you talking to guys so something happened for him to feel uncomfortable, warranted or otherwise.
No I don't, since we got together it was kind of an unwritten rule that I don't talk to other guys but he himself claims that he's not going to talk to any other girls but me (he's serious as well) there was an "incident" a while back, 3 months into talking to each other we went on a break and I talked to someone else, when me and him got back together I told him and he ended it with me (we sorted things out now though)
Sounds like long distance bullshit to me
You wasting your time.
It probably feels insincere to you.
Not long distance
So you went on a break from talking to each other 3 months after meeting, hmm, what happened during this incident that cause this break?
Usually with friendships there isn't a 'break' or a stated break, it just happens, so there's some underlying tension here. Who initiated this break? How long did it last?
It wasn't really a friendship. We implied that we liked each other more than friends but we were taking it slow. I initiated the break
Ah, now we get to the root of the problem.
By abruptly breaking off the budding energy of a relationship you've introduced some destabilizing qualities to it; fear of abandonment felt by you boyfriend, installing yourself as the dominant person in the relationship, putting your boyfriend in the one-down, obsequious, position where he feels he needs to please you to stay in your favor and probably some self-blame/guilt on the part of your boyfriend for feeling as if he did something wrong to be abandoned.
Now, when you're in the dominant position in a relationship the partner who is one-down feels this and feels as if they need to please the dominant person less they abandon them or leave them behind. The worth they have for themselves is the worth you have in them and the more distance you create in the relationship dynamic the more the one-down person will 'cling'.
A healthy relationship is one where the one-up and the one-down positions are mutually interchanged between the partners. If each partner stays in a particular role for too long it gets boring and the relationship will stagnate and fail. But I'm not going to tell you what to do to rectify this situation, you will have to use this knowledge and listen to your intuition to decide what to do from here.
Is he physically attractive to you? That nagging feeling might be that you dread having to lay with him.
I’m not really that attracted to him
Please just leave him. I was the guy in this situation and it took 6 months for me to wise up to the reality that she didn't care about me. It baffles me how women can go on so long like that just fucking tell me how you really feel damn.
this is obvious bait
You sound like a terrible person in the sense that your bf is clearly way more into you than you are to him. You're leading him on like he's a whipped dog. Poor guy is probably young with limited experience in relationships. I've seen your bullshit way too many times. If you were my gf, I'd already be distancing myself from you and making it clear if I don't get what I need from the relationship I'll move on to better options.
Break up. Date me.