After about a decade of working on myself, I've come to the conclusion that talent doesn't exist. My world view is entirely based on this. I also believe that ultimately, my destiny is in my hands. I can do or obtain whatever I want if I work for it.
My views come from books like:
amazon.com
However: If someone is good at something, especially at a young age, it's because they were rich enough which allowed them to spend as much time as they wanted or needed in the field with all the amenities- or they had the right type of community to allow them to get as good as they are.
I am utterly paralyzed by the fact that I probably grew up in the worst situation possible. Socially isolated, mentally unwell parents, poor, bad education and grew up in a bad area.
Sure, you can rise above those things but those are outliers, I mean we're talking about less than 1% of the population. And if you really want to get in the details, if you ever look at a person's formative years you can see where certain things overrode the deficits in their life.
I feel like I have a particularly deep understanding of the world, and the way it really works goes into direct contrast of how we actually operate. Anyone can be a great musician but it's virtually impossible to be one if you come from a bad area, have kids and a full time job. Stuff like this. The more of these kind of things you have in your life, the more impossible your pipe dreams become.
Then people give up and they go "I wasn't talented enough, I gave up." When the correct answer all along was, "Society has fucked me, anyone can be good at anything but the way the world is set up has prevented me from realizing my actual potential and exploring my passions."
I see people who live the life I want to live and I just can't see myself getting to that point. I have a master's degree but I'm working two hard jobs to just pay down the loans as soon as possible.