How to un-manlet

How do I un-manlet without going full blown Jow Forums with daily enemas/24/7 work out schedule? I'm not dedicated inside person or anything, I love being active but I work a 12 hour desk job 7 days a week.

I mainly just hate having spindly little biceps. I'm ok with my legs, forearms, neck and back, stomach is a little doughy but it's 'normal' (not fat but not a sixpack) What do? Can I just randomly pick up heavy shit as often as I can and get bulkier?

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>12 hours 7 days a week

I like money.

Well just buy like a bowflex changeable weight dumbell thing. They go up to like 55lbs and they only take up the space of one (or two dumbells if you get one for each arm). Then while you're at home watching tv just whip them out and do some curls and some basic exercises. Hell you could probably just do some pushups here and there

This kind of strain is why you're not physically healthy. Try to cut down to reasonable hours.

What makes you think I'm physically unhealthy? I just have little biceps, I'm not even weak I can lift my own weight over my head. BTW how long are you awake per day? I sleep polyphasically but I assume youre awake 16 hours a day? 8 working? 8 not? It's only 4 more hours and it's not like you turn off your body when you clock out. Grow some balls.
Yeah I want something harder than pushups and those types of workouts. I actually have a guy that really wants to sell me one of those. So those work I can just hop on that a few minutes every now and again throughout my shit and I don't have to alternate to a different machine or read an entire book on when to do what exercise etc?

What do you do that needs such long hours? Are you slaving away in the hope of a better future? Investment banking?

There's an entire fucking board for this, go read the goddamn sticky. Fuck off wageslave

I don't have to explain shit to you but you go ahead and assume whatever you want.
No. Jow Forums is for people who are already into fitness. You don't go in there asking about casual shit. You don't go to /mu/ and ask for recommendations, you don't go to Jow Forums and say positive things about jews, you don't go to Jow Forums if you couldn't build your own comp and OS from scratch. There are unspoken rules here kiddo, one does not simply go to Jow Forums and ask about noob shit.

>Im retarded
Good to know

You might have heard of these things called "gyms".

Do it if you don't believe me. Go ask /mu/ if DSotM is a good game. Go ask /v/ if the Switch is better than the PS4. ASK Jow Forums HOW TO GET A GIRLFRIEND. Do ANY OF THOSE and see what happens. Please, just fucking humor me, you don't believe me so nothing will happen right? Do it.

**album not game

I am aware of gyms. My residency offers one. They have many pros and cons, I choose not to go to the gym. Doesn't mean Im not allowed to work out. Thank you.

We're just trying to either help you or get a better understanding. Explain your 12 hour reasoning to us, don't be such a little bitch.

Dude you gotta start somewhere, go to Jow Forums and use the catalog to find the "Questions that don't deserve their own thread" thread.

>go shitpost
>that'll prove my point that you can't go on those boards as a newfag
Alright, since your wage cuck brain can hardly keep up, I'll spell this out nice and easy for you.

Go on Jow Forums right now




First off, drop the fucking ego. You're on an advice board. You came here for advice, at least try to be a little humble.

Second, buy a set of dumbbells. Don't have to be fancy, pick up a pair of 25lb dumbbells and bring them to work. You have the money. I don't know what you do for a living, because it's too important to divulge apparently, but I'm sure you can get away with doing a set or two every couple hours. Start somewhere.

Don't forget about the rest of your body though. At some point, working on biceps alone will make them stand out too much. After a while, try to incorporate other movements. Overhead dumbbell press, incline DB bench (in an office chair works just fine, just not max range of motion), etc.

Bring a good lunch to work, and snacks too. You'll never get big if you don't eat big. Keep your protein levels high, around 0.8-1.0g per pound of body weight.

Do this for 3 months minimum, and then come back and apologize.

You're mad at me because I work? Ok dude, good for you, still doesn't earn me telling about you personal details about my life.
I'll take a look at it again. Last time I looked at it I saw some shit about foam rollers and then one of those calisthenics schedules.
Read above, also maybe calm down a little, don't even know what you're really upset about.
My diet is actually very healthy and consistent with that. Dumbbell idea could work I guess.
Where's the guy that suggested Bowflex? I asked a question and still no answer.

Seriously wheres the guy that suggested Bowflex? Im into that idea, I asked about it... But evidently I won some penis measuring contest I didn't know about and that made everyone angry

Dude there's literally a thread on Jow Forums daily for helping newbies. I know because I use it a lot.
Also, there's always recommendation threads on /mu/ but they're labeled something akin to "what are the best bands of this genre".


Holy shit you are insufferable. Anyone giving you even a grain of advice is a blessing to your sad little life.

Just buy the fucking Bowflex dumbbells and do one set of 5 reps at 10lbs every 3 days like we all know you're going to.

Thought he was talking about the large Bowflex products, not sure of names but the original ones with the bows on the back. I could easily get one of those. Also why are you so angry

The larger ones take up a lot of space at home and generally don't give you the full range of motions and workouts you need to do a complete body improvement. If you want something big, you're better off getting a power rack with bench and barbell.

I'm having a tough day and your cynical responses set me off. Sorry user, it'll be better tomorrow.

That was a solid response, fair enough, thank you. The explanation at the end was unnecessary, it's Jow Forums, I expect to be flamed here. Happy you got a second of zen though.