Honestly being single is great. Incels have it made because it’s so much room for growth and potential as long as you’re under the age of 65.
Single man: >plenty of free time to work out and get in shape, increasing looks and health. Takes only around 2.5 years to go from 300 lbs to 200 lbs and replace the fat with muscle. This alone will increase your options with women 10x
>can focus on your career and generate wealth at your own leisure. Free time to pick up trades and credentials, maybe even get a degree if your field requires it. Increasing wealth again increases your options.
>you can focus more on hobby’s such as: reading, hiking, gardening, meditation, traveling and video games (fun ones not the normie ones but don’t let it distract you from the real world)
>you can go to bars and clubs as much as you want, perfect time to flex your accumulated wealth while grabbing a nice tall drink, get mired by young thots
>you can fuck any girl that decides to throw pussy at you, which if you get all your shit together and you’re between the ages of 25-60 will be a lot of them. (Ages 16-24 should be focused on developing yourself in terms of health, wealth and interest)
Overall as a single man that gets his shit together the world is your oyster. There are literally no excuses not to be your best self. Even if your fat and ugly, you can lose weight and your money will make up for your face. You don’t need to marry or date the first broad that gives you attention.
I don't really care about money. Trying to lose weight, slowly. Hate social places like bars and clubs. Have hobbies and try to keep them alive. Won't fuck a women, even if it was free.
That’s also I choice. You don’t specifically have to go to a club or bar, even just going out to your favorite restaurant by yourself is good. I suggest going out and flexing your wealth (I.e. dressing nice, ordering the best things on the menu) because it’s healthy to just socialize and get health validation to keep you motivated.
Money is important for security, the money you save during your early years can be used to take care of yourself during your later years.
>replying to a tripfag identifying themselves openly as female But go ahead, stack a couple more fuckups in there for posterity's sake my guy
Having a wife and kids is great to but never be complacent. You might think you got to the end goal (wife and kids), but it’s more to life to experience so you should always be improving. This constant adapting and changing will kept your wife interested and happy with your growth over the years, make her less likely to cheat and divorce you, and you’ll set a good example for your kids. Even though you’re married you should still self improve like you’re single, just don’t cheat on your wife.
Hahaha, yeahhhh. Well there's a point where the mounting nightmare that is day to day parent life can only be "won" by simply maintaining a lower rate of deterioration than your fellow parents. And experiencing life means bodily fluids and personal tragedy. But yes, best to keep your head up. Cheating? There is a point where you would gladly move out to get rest, but the kids matter too much. No, cheating is for people with too much time on their hands, like the French
I get what you're saying but clubs have never been my thing. Its too cramped to enjoy the place, not to mention there's underage girls at time pretending to be older than they are there. I don't wanna bang a lot of chicks but I do enjoy flirting with them, its like a game of chess but with words. The thing about incels is that their mentality is that they thing they are owed a relationship of some kind rather than trying to gain it. They surrender their locus of control to outside forces and just admit defeat yet yearn for success.
It doesn’t have to be clubs but my point is get out of the house.
What's crazy is just how delusional an Incel can be. A lot of them really thinks the world is built against them, conspiring, and sexing many sexs behind every corner.
Did you blink? That Stacy just did a sex and you didn't even SEE it. Even your eyes are virgins. Thats how much the world hates you.
You leave your room? Well fuck man, Your body pillow JUST fucked your gym shorts.
What's that? You're microwaving a bagel? Too bad, the moldy chad banana beat you to it.
If only you had a nicer jawline.
Yes. This just made me very positive. Time to get up
>Even your eyes are virgins. Lost it at this. Nice trips
>300lbs to 200 in 2.5 years >get a degree >actually have hobbies >leaving your basement How low is the incel bar jfc
>fuck girls that throwtheir pussies at you As if that would ever happen unless you drop some money for it.
I really struggle to get out more than once a month doing something where I might actually meet new people, let alone single women I'd like to go out with and eventually marry. That'll improve over the coming months as I get back into old hobbies and do meetups, but those meetups might add up to 2x/month and they're solitary hobbies in of themselves like playing music. Maybe I'll try a sport but I have to force myself to lift and run and never really liked the sports my parents made me do as a kid.
>Insinuating that anyone else needs a coping mechanism outside of your death cult.
It's from this tranny's video on inceldom. She purports that the incels function like a cult, and the ultimate purpose of the incel cult is death by suicide.
Blair White said that? I can get where the idea comes from. Being 100% incel/black pilled is incredibly unhealthy. Even if you look like a literal foot it’s always hope for you. Even Stephen Hawkings lives a long and prosperous life, it all just depends on what you’re willing to put your energy towards, complaining or improving.
>plenty of free time to work out and get in shape Already semi-jacked (at the very least, I get compliments) >can focus on your career and generate wealth at your own leisure Already on track for a career in pretty much anything I want with good pay. >you can focus more on hobby’s This is a good one, but I don't have friends, so I find it hard to do the hobbies where you can meet people, which is what I care about. If I only do the individual hobbies (e.g. reading etc.) then I just become more closed off. >you can go to bars and clubs Don't drink, and get anxiety in bars and clubs. >you can fuck any girl that decides to throw pussy at you That's literally no one (partly since I don't go to clubs I guess). >Ages 16-24 should be focused on developing yourself I feel like I still need to get some experience in that time, surely?
Btw, not criticizing the post, but this stuff just doesn't seem to be working for me.
How is it not working for you? What are you having trouble with? How old are you? What are your goals?
This post isn’t really meant to fix anything, it’s meant to change your perspective. It’s showing that being in a relationship isn’t all that, and sex isn’t that great either it’s pretty much a commodity these days. I’ve paid bookers and I’ve had sex with women in long term living relationships and everything inbetween. All sex pretty much feels the the same honestly.
>Even Stephen Hawkings lives Uhhh user...
I know he’s dead I meant “lived” my bad
20, main goal is to get a girlfriend, but also fitness related goals. I don't really have any career goals, aside from get as far as I can in my education/research.
I suppose either girls are still uninterested in me, or I just don't notice if they are. I also have a hard time meeting new people (I don't really know many places where it is socially acceptable to meet people, and I'm not too good at starting conversations with strangers), and when I finally find a girl I'm interested in, she doesn't reciprocate, and it takes such a long time for me to get over.
>main goal is getting a girlfriend
You’re young so you got plenty of time. Men pick in your sexual value around 55, so if you keep up with your fitness you have the potential to fuck 20 something year old girls until you’re 60.
With that being said, women should NEVER EVER be your focus. You might not think you’re desperate, but if you’re as fit as you say you are, the only reason I can think for you not getting a girl now is that you’re looking desperate and you don’t have your shit together.
Do not focus on women, they will come. You have atleast 4 more decades to get laid, but focus on saving money and building a business now. That will help you a lot more than anything else. Sex and girls need to be your last priority behind education, working, lifting and your hobbies. Honestly women shouldn’t even be on the list in your position, that should be optional once you’ve handled everything else. I promise you the second you stop caring about getting a girl and you improve your appearance (dressing better) the way your carry yourself and you have overall confidence in the person you’re building yourself to be that girl will come along, and funny enough you won’t even want her. Your purpose in life will eventually replace your desire for a girlfriend.
As a single guy (who's gradually getting his life together and is truly trying to get a girlfriend/maybe even a wife) I want to ask you, anyone here who's in a similar boat one question: Why are you lying about this?
Lying about what? Most guys I’ve met that are married or ya e a girlfriend are miserable and all the free time they have is devoted to her, which makes her despise him. The ones that aren’t miserable treat their women like shit and cheat on them, which ironically makes the wife/gf want him more.
How do I go to a bar by myself and get laid? I'm 25 decent job, ok build, long hair that I normally get complements from and such, but I've only ever done normal long term relationships, I have no idea how to meet a girl in a bar and get laid...
>you’re looking desperate As desperate as I am, I don't think appear that way. For the last two years, I have basically only been working on and improving myself. I dress fairly well, take care of my appearance, and carry myself well (I still have fuck all confidence though). I have been treating girls simply as friends/acquaintances, and not really pursuing anyone. The problem I am realizing, is that a girl won't just fall into my lap, so I feel like I need to get to trying to approach more girls, and try to get a girlfriend now, so that at the very least, I will have some experience and not be a complete sperg later on.
If your goal is sex, just get a girl alone and make your move. From there you can turn her into girlfriend and realize it was a waste of time.
I honestly could not care less about sex, otherwise I would just get a hooker, or go to a club and fuck someone. My goal is to get a long-term gf.
Singledom is great for a while. For example, when you're fresh out of a relationship and you're say 21 years old, it's best to stay single for a couple of years. Work on yourself, build a career, become a better man and don't get too distracted by a girlfriend who will soak up alot of attention.
That being said, singlehood becomes annoying at some point. At some point, you will want to find a great girl who you feel compatible with. Share each others lives, share each others stories and support each other through the good times and the hardships. Having someone to come home to after a long day at work feels good as well.
I’ve got some really bad news for you then. Girls your age just want sex, and if you try to tie one down she will just end up cheating on you.
Surely this is a meme. I see plenty of people with high school sweethearts. I struggle to believe there isn't a single girl my age who doesn't want a long-term relationship now, considering how many guys want that.
Women want relationships, but preferably with guys they want sex from. But the guys they want sex from don't want a relationship.
You see? It's not that women don't want relationships, it's that many of them hopelessly chase after a relationship with the kind of guys who only fuck them but nothing else.
Refer to And then this leads into my next point of women that young will end up cheating on you. I know married couples in their early twenties that are already cheating on each other, and the women have no shame about it.
When you’re marrying or dating a woman long term you’re basically just telling her you have no other options and therefore you aren’t attractive to other women. Women want guys that can’t be tied down that every girl wants, they want a loyal ladies man basically but any guy that can fuck any woman he wants is going to do just that. So even if you do get a girlfriend the chances of her cheating on you are very high because there are other guys your age that she actually wanted to be with first that couldn’t be tied down to one girl. Women say they hate players and assholes but has it ever occurred to you that they had to or have been fucking these guys to even have an opinion on them in the first place? What a woman says she wants is completely different than what she will actually respond to, and seeking a relationship with a woman is the best way to shoot yourself in the foot when dealing with one.
You might not think a casual sexual relationship is all that, but often times a woman will treat a guy she’s just fucking way way way wayyy better than she ever treats a guy she is dating or married to. The only perk to dating a woman is that you might get sex from her more regularly but you also gotta deal with all her bullshit on the regular too. The guy that is just fucking her can get all the positive perks of being her boyfriend with few of the negatives.
I’ve had girls I’m just fucking cook meals for me while they pick up takeout for their boyfriend on the way home from fucking me. Who would you rather be in that situation?
You don't need to lecture me about the pros and cons of casual sex vs a relationship. I've had both. I've been in a LTR for over 2 years, and i've had a handful of fuckbuddies over the years.
And still, i do want a committed relationship sometime in the future again. Don't fool me or yourself by saying that having a girl you're casually hooking up with is the holy grail in life. It's not. I don't know about you but coming over to a girls place just to fuck her gets stale quite quickly. Yes, even if she cooks up a few pancakes afterwards. I do however like the idea of building an emotional bond with a woman and building a family together. Support each other in life on the side of having sex.
And no, being in a relationship doesn't make you a beta cuck by default. The problem is that guys (and women too) often get fat, lazy and comfortable in a LTR. They start farting and burping around each other and then wonder why they lose attraction for one another.
If you're a high value guy and you continue working on being high value, your girlfriend/wife can definitely stay loyal to you.
To each there own, but just from the shit I’ve seen, and done it’s no way I’d trust a woman in a LTR. I’ve cucked too many guys and I’ve been cucked myself, I’m by no means a beta male and the guys weren’t half bad themselves. I agree that women cheat once you get complacent but most will cheat anyway. NFL players and All Star Basketball players get divorced and cheated on. You think your average Joe scrubby ass will be able to keep a woman more interested than a famous sports athlete or the owner of Amazon.
In my opinion all relationships are short term, it’s rare that feeling of love last forever and the one who looses the feeling first is the women very early on. The think about a casual sexual relationship is that the woman is more likely to just walk away once those feelings leave her instead of stringing you along and cheating on you.
A “LTR” (extended short term relationship) has its benefits for consistency and maybe pooling resources together to get by for a while, but beyond that the man will end up investing much more into the woman and she will walk away eventually either emotionally or in the worst case physically (divorce) if you’re dumb enough to get married.
Technically I’ve had “LTR” with fuck buddies, we’d fuck and go on dates like a normal couple but she wouldn’t move in with me and my life had little to with hers so I was free to see other girls, but again I got pretty much all the benefits a boyfriend would. She would drive me places, support my endeavors or whatever but we had no plans to get married or shack up together, at best she would stay for a weekend but most of that time was spent fucking.
Again I don’t see what you gain from limiting your options to one woman and investing everything into her when it’s a high chance of her walking away or cheating when a better option comes along, even at your best there will be better guys than you, and she will leave you with no remorse.
>Men pick in your sexual value around 55, so if you keep up with your fitness you have the potential to fuck 20 something year old girls until you’re 60.
Only if you're insanely rich, have access to adrenochrome, and good genes. For most men it's more like 30-35 is the peak.
100k income is good enough and easy to reach by your 50s even if you start in your 30s, even better to start in your 20s.
>Again I don’t see what you gain from limiting your options to one woman Your viewpoint sounds very biased because of bad personal experiences.
See, not all guys want to stay fuckboys for the rest of their lives. Some of us want to find a woman we feel compatible with and build a family. I see so many of these 40+ year old single men (self-proclaimed MGTOW's/redpill guru's or PUA's) nowadays with no children or life partner and i honestly think it's a bit cringeworthy. Like seriously, you're 45 year old dude and you still go out to clubs every weekend to hit on sluts?
I'd rather invest my time in building a relationship that adds value to my life and allows me to raise a couple of productive children. I'm pretty sure that will leave me feeling much more fulfilled than rotating from one slut to the next for the rest of my life.
100k income is not enough to be peaking in your 50s. More like $5M networth minimum
It’s possible but very unlikely and honestly anything above 800k for retirement is excessive.
For reference, 1.5mil is the retirement plan for military vets with the highest rank that served 20+ years.
Man, the woman in the pic deserves better. Though, she's probably not the angel that projects herself as. Maybe I'm projecting...
OH FUCK OH SHIT.
>spending most of your youth prepping for bar thots
Nah, i'm good.
The dating and social climate isn’t built for monogamy.
I understand wanting kids and eventually even I will pick a woman I want to properly breed with, but marriage? No. Most women are total sluts from ages 13 to 40. So you’re saying you want to invest your time and resources into a woman that’s been on around 50-100 cocks even being as a generous estimate. The only way I’d even consider marriage is if I met a young 18-25 years old virgin (or at most had 5 previous long term boyfriends), but short of that I wouldn’t bring myself to take the modern slut seriously. They have no standards for themselves and they try to emulate men too much (finding a career, sport fucking in their most fertile years and developing emotional baggage or physical baggage like children and debt).
I pray you find that perfect woman who is actually marriage material but what’s actually going to happen is you’re going to be in your 40s and settle for a woman around your age that’s been fucked by tons of guys and she might be close enough, but it’s going to bite you in the ass I promise you. Unless you’re part of a traditional orthodox religious community the odds of you finding a woman that’s genuinely marriage material is slim to none just due to the slut culture in the west alone not even to mention a host of other factors that make it impossible to find a decent wife. But if you don’t care about a woman’s past, or you’re willing to raise another man’s kids (which you will be responsible for once married), or take on a woman’s college debt (which you will be responsible for once married) by all means do it but you’re sacrificing yourself for an idealized interpretation of love that no longer (and probably never did) exists. Your hopes and dreams are noble but have no basis in reality, and any guys that’s been with a lot of women will know this is true. This is why most alpha males treat women like shit and don’t settle down.
>most women >50-100 cocks Where the fuck do you live where this is considered a normal lay count?
The United States, most women lie about their lay counts. But typically your average 22 year old college student will have started fucking around age 13-15, and will be with around 50 guys by the time they graduate, 20 is the lowest I’ve met.
I don’t know where you live that you haven’t meet girls with astronomically high body counts, maybe you’re not in the US or maybe you just prefer to be blind and pretend girls aren’t out here fucking at a early age, through out college and well into their 30s, honestly 50 is a conservative estimate by the time a woman hits her 30s.
You think these women are just sitting around waiting for a scrub like you to wife them up, saving her vagina for you? No they been getting dogged out by assholes like assholes like me since middle school, even the so called good girls are going to have been with 10-15 guys which is way too many. You must being living under a rock if you don’t realize women are fucking different guys all the time.
Don't you get tired of LARPing this much? What do you even get from this?
Aren’t you tired of being an incel or getting cucked by thots you think will actually love you?
Any more soundboard posts?
basically all wrong/platitude garbage Not fat, have a career, make 6 figures, live by myself, have hobbies, go out regularly STILL SINGLE
This isn’t the “how to get gf guide”, this is finding pride in being single because you’re way in way better position than guys that are in relationships or married because you have more free time to focus on yourself rather than cater to some thot.
I honestly feel like incels have no idea how much of a burden on your time, money and resources a serious girlfriend really is. Having a girlfriend is like having a child or pet that doesn’t respect you, that can walk away with everything you’ve invested in them at the drop of a dime. As a single man you can invest entirely in yourself and fuck whoever you want so long as you continue to improve, make yourself attractive and put yourself in a position to meet willing women.
And to add, just being “not fat” isn’t enough. Get ripped, put on actual muscle. Change your diet and dress better. Take trips to tourist traps where whores run rampant. You don’t need a girlfriend to have sex, in fact having a girlfriend just lowers your options to 1 girls implying you’re faithful to her, where a single muscular rich guy literally has the option of atleast 500,000 different women to fuck depending on your country, but that number increases even more when you travel. You got the money, use that money to invest in your body (muscles, skin care, hair) and looks (dress better, suits, jewelry), hell you can even buy a nicer car. Do what you gotta do but a girlfriend will not solve your problems, it will add more to your life.
I’m trying my best to help them. The general memes I see people spouting for incel advice are:
>just bee urself :) >take a shower >lose weight >don’t be ugly >pay a hooker >don’t do a mass shooting >have sex
While on the surface this would generally be okay advice, I noticed what these guys lack is an acceptance of being alone. They value female attention and companionship way too much. Ironically if they just focused on themselves and gave up that thirsty desire for a girlfriend they could probably attract more women then they know what to do with. There is no excuse other than pure thirst when there are ugly fat short nerds that get pussy out here.
But wanting girlfriend is what shoots these guys in the foot, they really think they want a girlfriend but they wouldn’t even know what to do with one if they got one. They think if they get that one girl that will be it, that one perfect girl and dating is done, like a video game. You unlock the girlfriend and boom you got it now you just save your progress and enjoy it whenever you want. It doesn’t work like that, women are a headache, they are needy as fuck, they require damn near constant attention, some require you to empty your bank account, some come with kids or tons of other baggage. It’s not as easy as these guys think it will be, you don’t just fuck a girl and that will be it, now she’s your girlfriend for life and you live happily ever after.
With the amount of inexperience most guys here have they will get their souls ripped out by any woman that crosses their path, even the “nice girls”. Women are fucking vicious manipulative creatures by design, so they need to be happy being alone before they can even hope to have a girlfriend, because even if they get one it won’t last long, they will get cucked in a heartbeat.
Just go to a bar regularly until a girl notices you. Dress your best and look like you’re actually enjoying yourself, smile, order your favorite drinks and food. Make sure it’s a popular bar, but I suggest going on Thursdays or Fridays, Saturdays get kinda crazy and annoying.
Do this for a couple weeks, observe people around the bar. Notice who is liking at you and make your move accordingly. If you notice a girl looking at you more than twice she’s probably into you, just go and say “hi what’s your name”. It’ll either be a hit or miss from there, and you’ll get more misses than hits, but it’s the hits that count in the end so ultimately don’t think so much about it. Just enjoy yourself, there is no secret way to do this shit contrary to what pick up artist fags will have you believe. Eventually you’ll just get lucky and you’ll run into a girl that likes you if you go out regularly enough, but don’t don’t look like a desperate weirdo. Just put yourself in a position where they will notice you or you can notice them and look your best and feel your best whenever you go out. If your hair is your best feature make sure it’s on point and compliment it with nice clothes. If possible go out with a friend too, just so you’ll have a extra pair of eyes but it’s not really necessary.
>They value female attention and companionship way too much If you lack it then it's hard not to, especially when you go outside and see all the Chads with gfs. I haven't dated for 3 years (not by my own choice), but it's true what you said about gfs needing constant attention though which is funny since at first, the girl usually doesn't give a fuck about the guy. But I still prefer a gf over being single like now.
What you want is a girl to spend time with, and I get that. I’m with a girl as we speak but I still consider myself single.
If you got the funds, just hire a escort to spend a few hours with you. You don’t even have to fuck her, if you pay her enough you can have her come to you on a day she is fresh and clean before she goes to see her other clients, she might even take the night off depending on how she’s feeling who knows. I’ve had relationships with strippers and escorts (i usually paid them the first time but after that we became cool and it was normal) they aren’t as bad as people make them seem.
Other than that, you gotta just play the field and wait until you meet a chick who is genuinely into you. Refer to just work on yourself in the mean time.
Why do I keep going? It's impossible to stay happy and hopeful when stupid bullshit is inevitable. It's a week before class at a new university starts and now a huge chunk of my financial aid has disappeared without notice. My tuition bill is now thousands higher and I'm just stuck waiting till monday for their office to open to talk to someone and figure out how fucked I am. And even when it's not tuition it's something else. Like having to redo massive projects three or four times, or my car breaking down, or friends disappearing, or working at a help desk and repeatedly having someone make massive changes without telling me giving me 100s of calls with issues that I have figure out on my own while on the phone with frustrated users because our admins don't bother to tell me before they fuck up our websites. Even when I try my hardest there's always something out of my control screwing me over and now I'm having panic attacks because of it. I can't even kill myself as an easy way out because I don't have the balls to do anything effective like tie a noose. The closest I can get would be killing myself through malnourishment on top of some weird undiagnosed heart problem that's probably also causing the panic attacks, and I don't have medical insurance to figure out what's wrong. I collapsed in an alley looking for missing kittens yesterday. But it probably won't kill me and give me my easy way out so I'm stuck panicking and dealing university and financial stress on top of the health issues. I just want to do my best and have friends without being scared of whatever the next big thing that will fuck me over is.
I'm an incel and I recognize the benefits that I have as a single man but I just can't help feeling the need for validation from women or the minor dislike I have towards women for constantly rejecting me or the immense pressure I feel when trying to talk to them. Or how they seem to zero in on guys who hurt them a lot of the time while ignoring me. It feels like a never ending self-fulfulling prophecy of not being able to get laid or get a gf because I've never had sex or a gf and that lack of inexperience affecting my confidence. It's almost like a trap. It's like trying to get a job later in life when you've never had one (I was a NEET for awhile and didn't get my first job until my early-20's). No one wants you when you've got no experience. And it drives me crazy because I just want to express myself sexually, I want to rawdog some pussy and be a sexual beast so badly but no one wants me to be like that for them.
You just have a distored conception of reality that makes you confuse many things.
You see yourself more like an infant in desperate need of a caretaker. This isn't good to begin with as a healthy relationships is based on mutual respect and not on needyness.
And you are notoriously bad at picking out a good caretaker. You focus on the bitchy femme fatal-type girls missing out the warm ones that don't play games.
absolute honest truth bombs, here guys.
It's funny, I used to come on here when I had a girlfriend and used to laugh at all of you saying this stuff. I used to think "oh these guys and their warped views, they just have not met the right person yet like i have, i know my gf is different".
She ended up leaving me to go find other dick after 4 years.
Afterwards i entered the world of tinder and made me lose all hope in women.
All women were total whores and sluts , i'm talking about even educated one from top unis. One of them after i fucked her and she gave me a blowjob, started texting her boyfriend and I was disgusted ( i had no idea she even had one).
I asked her did't she feel guilty, but she just shrugged her shoulders and asked when she can see me again.
This is just one of many examples.
Honeslty it is getting to the point where i have lost all faith in relationships.
>1 gf and tinder equals to "women" Now who is a genius...
I got so used to the comforts of being single that I cannot Imagine myself anymore in a different scenario. I like having freedom, a pile of cash and peace.
>You see yourself more like an infant in desperate need of a caretaker. This isn't good to begin with as a healthy relationships is based on mutual respect and not on needyness. >And you are notoriously bad at picking out a good caretaker. You focus on the bitchy femme fatal-type girls missing out the warm ones that don't play games. You're not wrong. I also have a problem of falling in 'love' way too quickly and easily.
Maybe you are looking for a person to fill out the function "caretaker" in your life and not actual love? A good start might be to become more self-sufficient.
You are no toddler anymore whose life and death is depending on their caretaker. At this stage i's natural to put up with whatever behavior is thrown at you. Even if it's bad behavior you will put your caretaker on a pedestral because you don't have any choice and alienating them in any way might end up in abondonment.
This might get your conception of love all messed up and twisted. But on the positive you are no longer dependend. You don't need a caretaker to survie anymore and therefore don't need to put up with any behavior some girl might show.
I agree with the general thrust of what you say, but it hasn’t worked for me. I get approached by women fairly regularly, but they only seem to be interested in casual affairs and that’s something I’m unable to cope with since being intimately touched sends me into a full-on panic attack. I absolutely need to develop a relationship slowly and gradually escalate the degree of intimacy until I’m comfortable, but it doesn’t seem as though as though any women want that. Based on my appearance, they tend to peg me as a confident ladies man and when I explain that I’m more of a hand holding type, they back off.
This can be for various reasons. Maybe you are sending out vibes that you want to keep a certain distance. This tends to attract likeminded women. Or you don't notice the more subtle signals of others girls because they don't fit in your concept of how relationships are formed? Or you don't meet them at the right places? Some venues are known to be more superfical.
It's hard to say over the internet. But in general you seem to have a distorted perception. I would try to fix.
Read through the thread, the goal is not a fucking girlfriend. You end up having casual affairs because that’s what most girls want anyway, unless you’re well off then they will want a relationship to get at your money. Refer to these post and stop crying about a girlfriend.
>Maybe you are sending out vibes that you want to keep a certain distance This is almost certainly true. I have difficulty forming attachments and feel uncomfortable around most people. This is something I want to change and I see forming a relationship as an important part of that change, but it makes sense that girls would pick up on that coldness and respond to it in that way. >Or you don’t notice the more subtle signs of other girls because they don’t fit in your concept of how relationships are formed? This is probably also true. When I said “approached” in my previous post, I was referring to behaviours that are so blatant by female standards that they may as well be hitting me on the head with a frying pan. I don’t really pick up on anything less. My peers’ relationships all seem to have formed organically. They just spent time together and eventually something grew out of it. I’m not really used to spending time with people outside of a group context and prefer to be alone if possible. To touch on your last point, the only times when I interact with others are at university (just graduated, starting my masters at a different school in September) and when working. Otherwise, I try to accept any invitations I receive, not because I enjoy social gatherings, but as a character building exercise. People do tend to approach me on these more boisterous occasions where I’m not really in my element.
I've gotten in shape but I still have the general disdain for women that I gained when I became an incel. Even platonic female friends I've had before that point don't seem trustworthy to me anymore.
Obviously this probably makes me even less approachable than before, unless the incel meme that girls are attracted to that behavior turns out to be true.
You have disdain for them because you subconsciously notice they treat you better since you become good looking, which is normal.
It’s okay to hate them, just hold in the autism long enough to fuck then out of spite if you are into that sort of thing. Otherwise just do like you’ve been doing, increase your money and continue to workout.
Everything you do should be for yourself and be in your best interest because as you can see women are shallow bitches and will never just love a man for who he is anyway.
If people are approaching you both in a romantic and platonic way this is a good sign. There seems to be nothing inherently wrong with you. So you need to develop a more realistic picture of this whole thing.
If you are not open to conversation most people will accept this and move on. It takes either extra confidence or bluntness to approach people who come of as cold. So your sample of what girls are like might be somewhat biased.
You can expand this sample by looking how other women are and how they communicate. For me personally it helped a lot to see women more as people on a larger scale than the alien other gender. There are confident and shy ones and bad and good ones. You should be looking for a likeminded person who happens to be female and not so much for a female who might be likeminded, if you get my point.
Feeling uncomfortable in social situations can changed when it comes to feeling crippeling. You seem to perceive these situations as threats and fear missing the strength to master them. So it's rational to avoid this situationas as best as you can.
Here you can try to build selfworth and skills to master these situations. You basically learn to how to detect toxic behavior, what sane boundaries are and how you set limits to people crossing them. If you have aquired this sort of skills you shouldn't be afraid of failing in social situations. Over time confidence will set in and you will feel more comfortable.
Transfering school might be an ideal point to start working on this.
>Honestly being single is great. yes >Incels have it made because it’s so much room for growth and potential as long as you’re under the age of 65. no
part of why they are incels is because their lack of judgement they have a moral take on modern social dynamics so they get bitter and full of hate instead of just swallowing them and trying to take whatever they can from their circumstances unlike those friendly virgin fat wizards with long hair who know a lot of stuff and help you fix your pc
It sounds like you've never experienced emotional intimacy to miss it. It does wonders for your mental health and I became way more functional when I had access to it.
Look up oxytocin (the "love hormone")- men get it from relationships and it's proven to enhance social intelligence in men.
The thing is that men and women are effected differently by oxytocin. The effects on men make them act as better partners, for example subconsciously making them more faithful. The effects on women have a lot less to do with men and a lot more to do with having and caring for children.
Teens sex was universally shit. Don't let memes tell you otherwise. And yes there's a point of gfs. Compassion from the opposite sex is something you can't attain from other means.
31 yo oldfag confirming. As you get older you will notice that as you age and become experienced pussy gradually loses value and females have less and less power over you and your self esteem. Sex is no longer magical holy grail and they cannot honey trap you or use it in any way to lead you. You have to make some mistakes to get there though to see for yourself how little worth it is and what are the real sources of happiness and self validation. You will learn to say no to the chicks you were drooling to before. At that point you will know you are a man, not a boy. Some never get there, but these who strive for it, will.
Never chase, but there are situations when you meet a valuable female. If you are high status, things will go smoothly as you are equals, she knows you're good stuff, you know she's good too. And it's coming from a guy who had been with shittest skanks on this earth mostly.
Just learn to scan for the valuable ones, not the trash, and trash is like 80%, pretty much same amount as with men. But the females can be used for sex just like low value males are used for validation and free money.
>It sounds like you've never experienced emotional intimacy to miss it. Pretty much. Considering all the shit my friends went through with heartbreaks, STIs, pregnancy scares etc I took it as a blessing in disguise.
>oxytocin I don't want it, literally turns men into simps and I'm good with the friends I have now.
>Compassion from the opposite sex is something you can't attain from other means Compassion is a meme, half of all marriages split and not to mention all the cheating which goes on.
Just give a girl like $300 and she's yours for an hour with no consequence of child support, alimony or broken heart. You get the body to fuck like an animal and then cuddle afterwards which is all most men really want anyways.
The thing with sex is, it's not 100% about pleasure. It's an experience where you and another person can be completely vulnerable - this opens you up to someone where you can be completely yourself. I doubt even my friends know me as well as my ex did.
Wanna know how I know you’re a virgin? The only vulnerable party during sex is the woman, you’re bashing her guts around and forcing her scream out in pleasure. Then you throat fuck her and cum down her throat, after that she worships the ground you walk on.
Anything short of that you’re just a beta male she “has sex” with. You might kiss and hug during sex and feel a “connection” but it’s all a manipulation tactic that women use on beta males to pull more resources out of them and keep them around longer.
Women don’t kiss or hug alpha males unless the alpha wants to but he won’t because that’s where his dick goes. The same woman you’re “making love” to and building a “connection” with is or has been getting pounded by some 6’5 300lb muscle bound stud who is using every hole on her body as a human fleshlight and she loves every thrust and slap of that more than your boring vanilla “love making”.