>im a 19 y/o virgin >thought I met the one after clicking incredibly well with this girl >decide I'd let this girl take my virginity >technically >have had penetrative sex with her multiple times now >she's never made me cum >I've made her cum 5-6 times now >she made me give her oral a week before she even let me go insider her >appreciate its harder for me to cum as I was a virgin and relatively new to condoms and shit >give her oral all the time >she gave me 10 seconds (literally 10 seconds) of oral >felt 100x better than vaginal with a condom does >ask her to do it to help me cum >she says she will in the morning >she had just come from sex >I didn't >wait til morning and she comes up with an excuse to wait til night >so I do >now laying in bed side her as she's sleeping and just refused to give me oral cause she's too tired
Second time I've laid here and cried beside her because I've felt so used and unfulfilled.
She makes me happy in so many ways but this makes me significantly more depressed
I feel so trapped and don't know what to do. Might actually ask her to take me home right now as she drove, but I'm worried she'll break up with me and being alone was so bad.
You need to talk to her and tell her how you feel. I suggest asking her gently to try birth control.
I talk to her about EVERYTHING, this included. See, there is some good in her cause she was looking at IUDs today (not that she's necessarily gonna get one), which is very selfless.
But when I bring up how denying me an orgasm and not reoccupupating is selfish, she says I'm "moaning" if I continue she won't give me anything.
Break up with her and better yourself. Being alone now is much better than where you're heading.
I suggest getting ultra thin condoms and abstaining from sex for a week at a time. Make her feel good over time. Do this for a month cos it sounds like you have death grip.
Dude, come on, "denying [you] an orgasm"? Like shit. She's not a cumbucket for your pleasure.
Try to get your head in a better place when you're having sex, if that doesn't work, ask if you can masturbate while you snuggle afterwards. She's having sex with you, apparently having more of a personal relationship with you, too, and all you're doing is crying about her not letting you go bareback on her.
I've been on nofap for past 2 months of dating her, its just nerves and I think wrong condom size
Get the fuck out my thread cause you're brain dead retarded. Sex is two way, you give and receive and in a healthy relationship.
She's taking and not giving
That's hot af. Id love a gf like that, but then again Im a degenerate virgin with a terminal case of no gf and a teasing fetish. Seriously though, you really should tell her how you feel. If your gf likes you (sounds like she does because you seem to fuck a lot), then she'll understand that she needs to put in some more effort to make you satisfied, too. There also could be things you can do to make yourself more likely to cum, like not masturbating or drinking alcohol. Do the condoms feel too tight? If theyre too small, it could prevent adequate sensation on your end. And how often do you masturbate?
Condoms feel tight, I'm a fair size, big enough she cannot sit on me cause I hit her cervix
I do talk to her about it, she complains I'm moaning and won't acknowledge what I say
I don't masturbate at all
You need to get used to wearing condoms. I had the same problem as you, eventually learned how to orgasm in a normal condom. Keep at it, don't feel used.
She does let you keep going after she cums, right? I mean it's just more orgasms for her.
When you're talking about your need to receive oral, how does she respond?
>Condoms feel tight They're probably too small. Get a larger size immediately. >I do talk to her about it, she complains I'm moaning and won't acknowledge what I say She sounds like a cunt and is probably using you. Just enjoy having a fuckbuddy for a little while, lose your virginity, then tell her she either needs to shape up or ship out. In the mean time, try getting her all worked up, but before you eat her out, whip out your cock and tell her to suck you off. If she refuses, say no sex for her then. Btw, did she say why she doesnt want to suck you? Some girls are just lazy and think it's gross, but there could also be another reason she doesnt like it.
Fair, I assumed it was about getting used to them, so was planning on giving it time. Told her not to bother with an IUD.
Not really, once she cums that's basically it, whether I've cum or not.
She says she hates oral, then after some convincing promises to do it, and when it comes to it she makes excuses to not do it or delay it
I'm apparently not allowed to ask for sex cause its "weird to plan it"
Uh. She sounds kinda needy herself, how old is she?
My motto is: I only give oral when -I- want it. Don't put your everything into pleasuring your partner at your own expense, your intent is noble, but the result isn't.
I'd also recommend you masturbate a bit. I'm not talking 5 times a day like you're a middle schooler. Just once every 2 days, it might relax you enough to orgasm during sex (it will certainly alleviate some inner tension).
I'm almost 20 she's 19 I still have no idea what to do
Daily reminder that denying your boyfriend of sex is a type of domestic abuse used by people with narcissistic personality disorder
Masturbate asap. Try doing it with a condom.
She's having sex with him.
I feel nothing. I am not coming. She is coming, she gets oral to help, she won't even give me a hand job.
Try not giving her oral. Also,
She needs to be understanding. It's funny because my girlfriend has the opposite problem; it took her 11 months to be able to get me to cum from handjobs and I still can't from oral. It sounds like your gf doesn't care which is sad and again you gotta communicate with her and let her know you feel sad because you're not being satisfied. If she's understanding she'll understand. . If not, good luck man.
Can't masturbate. Stuck here laying in her bed not even cuddling for the first time just wanting to cry
I give oral because I care about her pleasure and want to have a strong relationship
Been googling it and I think she stonewalls me cause I communicate about everything with her but this topic she shuts me down before I have a chance to begin
Dump, 19 is too late to learn good sex habits. She'll always be garbage
That feel when you nutted in -2sec first time.
But in all seriousness I dated a girl like this for aa little bit, It drove me crazy! sexually selfish just a total bitch desu in the end i started to make my feelings her problem. But that isn't the right way will not solve anything. Left her after that because i know i deserved better and my value was higher in the end. Gl OP
Stop edging when you fap, that builds up lack of sensitivity. You won’t be able to orgasm because your body is trained to hold back. Condoms are your friend, don’t ever trust female contraceptives.
Has it crossed your mind she was molested and forced to give oral? That’s a major possibility why she cuts you off from asking.
I'd say you should ditch that selfish bitch immediately. Not tomorrow, not next, week. Right now. Tell her she's not worth anything, and that being alone is preferable to her worthless companionship.
I bet you tell all the girls the girls you're a feminist too. Has anyone rewarded you with sex yet?
If she does have NPD (I have been on the side of narcissistic abuse a lot in my life), bring up what she does in plain language. Describe stonewalling to her without using the term. If she refuses to understand and turns it back on you nastily, she may be an undiagnosed NP
Says mr.dry spell, not everyone is looking for conflict man.
Or OP can take the non-beta option and tell her to make sex pleasurable for him or get the fuck out.
She talked about a story about that happening to her close friend. Maybe that was her way of telling me it was actually her?
Idk. No way I can know.
In 6hrs the alarms going to go off as we were going to go to a car show with her family. Already decided I'm going to ask her to take me home. I won't be going.
Unfortunately her companionship is the only thing holding my life together at the moment and I will be crushed if I lose her.
sex is supposed to be pleasurable to both people, at this current state she is using him whether she is trying to or not.
Most American women are narcissist, the media they consume all their life trains them to be “strong independent women” when in reality they’re just as flawed as anyone else.
Ahh yes, the "sex is only about me" route. I've never understood why anyone is dumb enough to stay in a relationship that is 95% boundaries.
>I give oral because I care about her pleasure and want to have a strong relationship Yes, and I'm telling you to masturbate, get a feel of your own body, relax a bit, because that's gonna help your relationship way more than if you give her even more head. >Can't masturbate. Stuck here laying in her bed What, are you tied up or chained or something? Go to the bathroom and masturbate. What's gonna happen, is she gonna grab you and force you back to bed? Then, that's a good time to show her you're disappointed.
You are doing it the wrong way. You are doing all you can for her, she ain't doing shit for you. You keep doing everything for her. Do you see how this does not create a motivational feedback loop?
Cut her off. I'd say throw her out on the street with all her stuff, but you sound very beta.
I just gave her the benefit of the doubt, nothing more. I am going to suffer from losing her, no doubt, so my only option really was to talk it through but she stone walled me.
You're giving her too much of your value. the best thing you can do right now is pick up your balls and distance yourself/improve yourself. Let her initiate contact once she has regained respect for you, then she'll suck your dick a lot longer than 10 seconds I guarantee it. It's all part of the game
Actually, I haven't had a single dry spell since I stopped taking shit from my women. Turns out women not only respond much better to a firm hand, they also like it and quite frequently get aroused by it. A woman that is bitchy and disrespectful doesn't deserve your time or your emotions, and will never become a worthwhile girlfriend.
OP, there are two scenarios in your future.
First, we can establish that she doesn't respect you. This is not a question or a discussion. You have told her in no uncertain terms what matters to you, and she continuously ignores that, and tells you to stop moaning when you want redress. Basically she is telling you to like it or get out. This can be either a bluff or real, but there is no question in that she has no respect for you, your needs, or your feelings. There are two ways forward from here:
>1) Play it "safe". Losing her would hurt, so you keep suppressing your needs and build up even more frustration, anger, and disappointment. She doesn't care. You get nothing out of your time together as the few fun things you do have turn to ash from all that pent-up frustration and the dawning realization that she only wanted to use you for her own emotional needs, she doesn't give a shit about you. In the end, she leaves you without closure even as you try to give her everything just to make her stay. You are decimated and you have to rebuild your confidence and strength afterwards.
>2) You realize that she will never respect you and never give you what you need. You tell her she's a worthless piece of shit and that suffering alone is better than staying with her. You get closure and and a feeling of self-respect. Getting rid of her hurts, but the choice to stand up for yourself makes you feel a little better, and rebuilding your confidence and strength goes faster, though it still sucks.
>selfish gf is making me depressed break up dumbass
>she says I'm "moaning" if I continue she won't give me anything. >you don't get to enjoy this action that is meant to be mutually beneficial if you don't make me enjoy it more settling for low can be a virtue but she seems to lack the very basics of human empathy. dump her.
>I give oral because I care about her pleasure and want to have a strong relationship i never said this before to anyone on Jow Forums but you deserve better. i know you're seeing this through rose tinted glasses but your girlfriend is using you, she clearly doesn't care about you or your pleasure. she's using you because you're willing to give more than take and she sees that as a weakness just get out of there
Whoa, that's abusive!
Tell her if she doesn't start reciprocating, you're gonna break up with her. What you are currently going through is UNHEALTHY and ABNORMAL.