Good evening anons, feel free to drop your worries and your concerns and I'll try my best to answer them all and comfort you.
Stress dump ->>HERE<<-
I posted this in the GIOYC thread, but what the hell.
I feel like I'm giving up on my dreams. I found a full time job that I really like, a part time job that I really like and am making decent money. I have some good friends, and I'm happy but there's this dark cloud hanging over me that I'm giving up on my dreams.
I always wanted to be a filmmaker. Since I was a kid, its all I wanted to do. I made movies from age 10 onward, and eventually got really good at it. Made a short film at 18, won me a scholarship, went to film school. Graduated, now I have a job teaching film production at a college and being a director of production at a fairly large contemporary type church (honestly, I really dig it). But I still feel like I'm giving up on ever making movies. I say "Maybe someday," but that feels like a lie. Like if I don't do it now, I never will. But I have to have an income. There are only so many hours in the day. And I have a ton of commitments.
Sometimes, I'm able to ignore this feeling and passion. But then I see a movie that hits hard and I remember why I wanted to do this. Why I keep folders of unfinished screenplays on my computer. Why I keep my YouTube with 5k subs up instead of just deleting it all. I don't know.
I just want to make movies. But the real world won't let me.
>"I just want to make movies. But the real world won't let me."
The world is not stopping you friend, it's your insecurities.
>"What if I don't make it big?"
>"What if I'm not successful?"
>"what if this costs more than what it's worth?"
Remind yourself that you did this in the first place because it is what you enjoy. Hell, I'm 23 and a major in robotic engineering and I feel completely unsatisfied with my life. However you, you know what you want to do. That puts you in an advantage not many people have.
Nobody said you had to quit your job either. Sometimes compromise is necessary, so try and dedicate your time to your dream as a hobby to begin with. The more time passes the more comfortable you'll feel with it and see your progress.
It's said that the "daemon" that pushes us forward to our calling can die down and never utter a word anymore if you ignore it long enough. You went to school for it, you copped a degree, and you're teaching it. Don't stop yourself halfway friend. Try to find a way around it, you can make it.
So, save up some money, and during your free time, come up with some ideas for something you'd like to shoot. Then, during your vacation take that saved up money and shoot some of it.
You can do it fren c:
Fuck. Thank you.
I think I just needed someone to tell me that.
As long as I'm able to help on of you bros, I'm happy c:
Don't doubt yourself user.
Free pass to complain (and maybe get a nice answer) here lads.
My gf is seriously not seeing that sex is needed in this relationship as well as a the other emotional and mental feelings. I'm growing tired of telling her that I'm not being fulfilled physically and that all I get is that "I have anxiety, I'm trying, you need to give me time". Problem is how much time and patience. I'm not gonna deny I watch porn so maybe my libido is slightly warped, but I dunno sex once a week seems doable, and yet I always have to deal with the fucking gate keeper and get walled. Shes seriously not helping me stay attracted to her and my mind is starting to wander to other females. I respect she has anxiety and other issues, but the fact she acts like me not having sex is ok cause she isnt is really starting to piss me off to the point of resentment
This was a year back and I still haven't told anyone of my self-mutilating phase but I really want to know as wearing knee high socks and long pants everyday is be coming a nuisance. I wanna show a friend but I don't want to come off as attention seeking, any help guys?
First of all, stop hiding it. You can always tell that wound came from an accident when somebody asks. Second: if they're your friends and you've never talked to them you can talk to them but rather get professional help.
I'm stuck in a shitty job until June. I hate it, I knew I'd hate it, and the only reason I took it is because it pays decently and I can help support my wife (who made most of our income last year).
If I quit, I can pretty much rest assured that I will never be able to work in the school district I teach in again, even if it's a far better position. My only hope is to either pray that a better job opens within driving distance in the next few months and I get it, or to make it to the end of the year. And the second option is going to be a major struggle. I work almost every hour I'm awake, and I'm lucky to get a total of 6 hours of sleep a night.
I don't know why I even wanted to be a teacher at this point. The negatives far outweigh the positives, and at this rate I'm going to be so burned out that I'm probably just going to change careers altogether at the end of the year.
You can't have an asymmetrical relationship where one person is clearly above the other. She clearly thinks she's better than you, user. Make sure she understands, fully...
I’m 26, and recently the guilt for my escapism in vidya and anime hit me like a truck. A friend of mine got a salary increase of 20k at new job because he kept applying to various jobs, while I was stuck at the screen running away from stress and job rejections. Feels like I played myself, and it seems I need someone in my life to keep me in check, which is a shitty situation IMO.
Your legs are hairy, no one is going to notice. If anyone asks just say you were hiking and slipped badly.
I can be socially awkward at times. Do people just want to talk about bullshit events throughout the day or do they just want to go 2deep4you on certain topics? How do I handle conversations
People can be open to 2deep4u conversations if you’ve been acquaintances for a while, but never start with those. I’d wait until after the second drink.
I can bet that the girl in the pic dumped him shortly after.
Friend of mine used to self-harm extensively, and his shoulders are laced in scars.
His wife thinks they're hot as hell. Embrace it.
>I don't know why I even wanted to be a teacher at this point.
But you do know. You have a reason, something that drove you through college, something that made you say "I want my life to be this."
You do know, you've just looked away.
How did you get out of that that she thinks she's better than him...?
The past literally cannot be changed. What's done is done. But you now have the clarity to change the future! No matter how late of a start you got (and 26 isn't that late) you're still lapping everyone on the couch.
Me and my complicated girlfriend have been together for 6 months, she is from a country in the caucasus region but studies in the city we met. When we were here everything was great apart from the occasional fight and one big fight about me 'being interested in other girls' and her kissing a girl in a club when i wasn't there. Early July she went back home to see her family. about 5 days in she started constantly feeling bad and attacking me in complete rage due to what i had apparently done, when my visa got approved I went to see her in late July.
She revealed she kissed more people in week when we were 'broken up' and I wondered if I should go. I ended up going on the 7 hour trip and the first night she was very happy to see me and introduce me to her family.
The next days we would pretty much have an argument every night how she couldn't trust me and wanted to be friends but we ended up reconciling each time.
To clarify her family is very backward Russian and her parents are split up and in a huge fight along with financial trouble.
I left her country on a good note and expected things to be better as I had shown my commitment to her.
Well shit, things only got worse and her attacks more and more vicious ssaying I was the worst thing to happen to her and being a 'leech' who always gets what he wants among other things.
While I'm usually quite strong it ate away at me and I snapped at her which eventually not talking and blocking one another wherever, leading me to say I'd throw her stuff out that was at my house (5 suitcases full), which was immature in hindsight but was in the heat of the moment
Fast foward to now and while we are both in our 20's she decided to get her mother involved. Despite me telling her to keep my family out of it she contacted my mother and calling me manipulative and pleading shed get her stuff for her. Ever since that happened we haven't spoken which was about 3 days ago.
With my family now fully involved I have no idea what to do.
I feel like I’m a failure and I can’t get anything right. I got discharged from the military and lost a year of my life and the respect of my entire family. I’m starting community college next month and that’s my last chance to prove I’m not a complete fuckup. I’m taking Agricultural Science in the hopes I earn a useful degree and an honorable job. I don’t think I’ll ever regain my dads respect.
I’m madly in love with my sister (23) and it’s ruining my life. I’ve never had a crush on anyone in my whole life (24) and I often have erotic dreams about her and it warps my perception of her. We both still live at home so I see her everyday and even drop her off to her boyfriend’s house and her job.
I molested her when we were younger which turned into consensual experimentation. She was my first kiss but I tell people I’m a KHV (I’ve held her hand before also). The experimenting stopped in 2011 and she’s been dating her boyfriend since.
I’m actually so fucking depressed man these anti depressants don’t do shit. I tried coping with hookups on Tinder but get no dates. Hooked up with guys from grindr in desperation but couldn’t get hard. I don’t know what to do
user... why do you want to continue this relationship?
But you just said yourself that you have another chance to earn their respect. Look, my cousin got drummed out for being a pothead while on duty, and yeah the family doesn't talk about it much. But if he did something with his life we would gladly embrace him for that.
But he isn't. He's still a blown out pothead with no motivation or prospects. Don't be like my cousin. You have a chance to prove yourself and learn from your experiences. And if that doesn't work you have another chance after that. And after that. And after that.
It doesn't matter how many times you fall, only that you pick yourself up one more time than that
I don't think I like my gf anymore. All she does is talk about work, she doesn't really have any hobbies and drives me insane. Talking to her feels like such a chore because she just retreads the same topics over and over. She also hates showing any sort of affection in public, even just holding hands and its really made me feel distant to her. Last night she told me that I'm her first boyfriend and now I feel like I'd be an absolute shit head to break up with her now.
I don't know what to do.
>got in a car accident when I was 17
>was at a party, got into a car with some drunk bitch for no reason other than to take a little drive
>going down a wide road in the center of town, have to converge on a narrow road up ahead
>she completely steps on it, going 80, tries to take a left, spins out
>hit a wall
>miraculously no other cars involved
>get a collapsed lung but it heals on its own
>some scratches but otherwise I’m fine
>but mentally I am fucked
>really scared of riding in cars for a while
>a year later and it’s a little bit better
>some friends pick me up and we go to the beach
>we’re all doing shots of Jameson along the way, including the person driving
>drunk driving is bad but I can’t really pick new friends so easily
>they assure me everything’s cool
>we all drink a lot more at the beach
>same person is driving us all the way back to my friends house when we’re done at the beach
>whole way back I’m nagging him to slow down a bit, saying we probably shouldn’t be going 80 (looking back we weren’t going any faster than the other cars)
>he has 1 hand on the wheel, other is holding his GF’s hand in the passenger seat
>best friend is passed out next to me in the back
>get to my best friend’s town where the driver also lives
>ring out my sandy swim shorts in his bathroom, make a bit of a mess
>leave and my best friend and I go to his house to hang out
>month later the guy who drove us dies from a drug OD
>Xanax cut with fentanyl
>he was 19 or 20.
Is it weird that I feel kinda bad that one of his last instances of fun and being young and wild involved me nagging in his ear to slow down and drive carefully?
I have really bad friends and should be doing it all differently I realize this
Because throughout everything I grew fond of her presence and going out without her there makes me anxious
The reality of my life is starting to dawn on me pretty hard. I didn't have a good childhood at all. My babysitter emotionally tormented me and there was a particularly bad day where worse stuff happened. And my parents always dismissed it all they just acted like I was making it all up, my dad was a drunk my mom dismissive. I fought with my brother constantly and I'm realizing that I resent my parents for it. I've made my goal to get away from them and I succeeded and now I realize how alone I am. I've always been alone and I've never been able to tell anyone about what happened to me I always had to lie even as a child I knew if I told anyone I would be taken from my parents and that would probably have been worse at the end of the day. I thought I could just bury it all away but the truth is it has stayed with me and morphed into a monster that I carry around with me. I have nightmares, depression, paranoid thoughts I am not saying this for attention like my parents would have said it is just the truth of my mind. And saying it all feels relieving but at the end of the day it is miserable. I desperately wish I could have had a truly loving family that's all I really wanted. I don't even know how to face my parents, they act all nice now but I can't really let go of everything that happened I don't want to hurt them but if I were to be honest to them it would hurt them for sure. I doubt they could handle it they could never handle this kind of stress which is why I had to bury it for their sake.
I was dumb enough to feel guilted into moving back to my mothers house, sold major assets to help pay for her handicaps (self-caused btw) and instead of trying to improve, the asshole used the money to pay for a caregiver to wipe her shitty ass. This has left me broke, void of motivation, and a social joke compared to where i was. Not to mention now being ostricized by the remainder of family, who disagree with me not tolerating such lazy lifeless behavior.
I have no idea what to do with my life, don't go to school or do anything productive with myself. I'm 22 and I've never had an interest/hobby that's lasted for more than a year so I have no idea what to go to school for. I just never seem to get any satisfaction or gratification out of anything anymore, including the time I spend with what few friends I do have. I'm afraid that if I do choose a study, I'll just end up hating it or the job I do end up getting with it. Not to mention my painfully awkward social nature, even speaking to my brother-in-law boss (who I'm very familiar with) gives me (what I think is) a small anxiety attack, and even my voice is naturally very quiet, which makes socializing with more than 4 people or in a loud environment basically impossible for me. Sometimes it feels like the only way I can be respected is through success and I have no idea how to achieve that. How do I get motivation without satisfaction? What am I doing wrong in life? Sometimes it feels like I'm living life in an empty shell and I'm just showing the emotions that people expect to see.
Anyway sorry for the jumbled paragraph, I wrote it as I thought it.
I have no hope for a future. I just feel like their isn't one for me. I think may have hurt my family by depressing them and I don't know what to do.
i love to create. i need to create.
im boring unoriginal and every concept i come up with is shit. i want to be unique and amazing, but why? who is watching? why am i doing this?
who am i? am i truly original or just copying what i see? do i truly understand what concepts im using or am i as dull and shallow as i fear i am?
i want to stand out from the crowd. i don't know why. i perform endlessly for the watchful eyes. i'm so tired. my act is getting stessful. soon people will see how boring i am and leave.
i need to go above and beyond but nothing inspires me anymore. i need a muse. i'm afraid of being a copycat. i hate the fact that i need others to motivate me. i wonder what its like to have original thoughts.
everyday is lifeless and repeative and all i do is pick up the pencil and draw draw draw. maybe thats why i cant think of anything good.
something needs to change but i dont know what it is. i fear change, but i need it. if i change, who am i doing it for? myself? for others to like me?
i don't know anyhing anymore.
i hate the watchful eyes of others who judge me.
im so tired. im so tired. im so tired. im so tired.
I've got, medical issues now. Diabetes for sure, a sometimes pain in my chest, and I'm only 30. I don't have any money, I don't know how to see a doctor over them.
I managed to score a scholarship and get into the ideal college for the career path that I've been wanting since middle. I've always seen myself working as an engineer and i never changed my mind and I worked hard for everything to line up.
And now that I've started studying to become an engineer I feel like I don't belong and that I chose the wrong career path and I don't know what to do. I don't want to lose my scholarship by just switching to another career path but I also don't want to become something I don't enjoy. I think I'm super fucked honestly
Why the fuck do I suddenly think I’m gay? My anxiety has been through the roof about this despite being perfectly fine the other day and any little intrusive thought or tingle downstairs causes it to get worse
> 5k subs
Making movies will be twice as hard for 1/4 the money.
If that sounds like you still want to, well then.