Is it worth it to watch pick up artists on youtube if you are socially inept person wanting a gf?
I feel like I have all other aspects of my life in check (health, fitness, hygiene, grooming, fashion, career, friends), but my lack of confidence and lack of experience with women has left me gf-less well into my twenties (i'm 24).
I am highly motivated to improve my situation, but am kinda lost and don't know where to start. What are some puas on youtube that give good advice? I've been watching Dan Bacon recently and he seems to have some generally sound advice, but he is constantly shilling his book, and not revealing all his knowledge.
imo, its just not the same when people try certain methods. Being naturally confident, decisive and honest is the best. The thought of running out of topics to talk will freeze you so you need to chill beforehand.
Most of it will be them trying to sell their real advice they don't show through DVDs and conferences. In general, some of their advice works (e.g. negging, KENO) but a lot of it is gay (e.g. peacocking). Don't take their word when they use hidden cameras, cause the women in those videos are usually paid actresses.
Yes, it will absolutely help you. I was in the same situation as you and just needed and extra push to start talking to girls. I read Bang by Roosh and started from there.
PUAs will give you steps to approach women, which in turn eases your insecurities about not knowing what to say.
>Is it worth it to watch pick up artists on youtube if you are socially inept person wanting a gf? perhaps. I guess the main question is: what do you mean by socially inept? >you have the guts to approach women but you dont know what to say after you introduce yourself >you're too scared to approach women at all
In the first case, I think it might help. In the second, nope.
Nah, it’s just snake oil
>health, fitness, hygiene, grooming, fashion, career, friends Are you sure you got all those things in check? If you indeed do, your only problem is that you don’t go out enough and meet new women !
Most of my contact with new people is from work (new coworkers and interns every month). I rarely go clubbing, and missed out on befriending lots of people in college as well.
I am kind of slow to open up to new people, it usually takes me a few weeks to start feeling comfortable with them enough to be able to hold a 1 on 1 conversation.
I believe the problem is lack of confidence. I always assume that other people won't like me, so I play it very slow and careful until I get proven that my fears are false. This is also the reason I don't have a girlfriend, I am afraid of rejection, and always think to myself "the girl would never want to go out with me", even though it probably isn't the case some times.
Recently I've been getting more attention from girls, but I am very clueless about escalating at all, so that's why I want to see if puas could help at least jumpstart me on the right path.
>Being naturally confident, decisive and honest is the best.
Yeah, sure. But how do I get good at this? I know trial and error is one way, but do I absolutely have to fail and get rejected 20 times to get good at the game?
Isn't there a book/guide I can read that would let me learn from other's mistakes and not require me to make my own?
Pick up advice is of help to specific type of men, in specific situations, seeking specific type of women.
I think that the vast majority of people, especially one such as you that have all other aspects of their life in order, just have to find ways of expanding their social circles (within their spheres of interest) in order to find relationship success.
I think that's a more worthwhile approach.
That being said, some of the advice circulating in pick up communities can be helpful is small dosages when you do find yourself in a relationship.
Reading this thread it's baffling to me what the people who oppose PUA say about it, because that's not the PUA I know. I personally don't like calling it PUA. I generally dislike all cringy internet terms like "redpill", "chad", etc. I just settle for calling it self improvement and improving social skills.
If your question is, can you learn to be better at attracting and flirting with women, then the answer is yes. It's just another aspect of social skills. If you want good sources you can watch The Natural Lifestyles on YouTube. Or you can read "Models: How to attract women with honesty" or "The Book of Pook".
Honestly, I think the people who argue against PUA usually don't know what they are talking about. What they are talking about doesn't describe the content I've seen at all. It's like they are repeating something they heard elsewhere or making up a negative image in their head. I agree that there is some very cringy, stereotypical PUA content out there, but it's very niche and not mainstream. Most of it is actually just general self improvement, changing negative self limiting believes, building inner confidence and increasing your social skills - overall and with women. If that doesn't sound plausible to you then suit yourself.
Thanks friend, will check out the listed resources.
A good chunk of it pretty much just revolves how to dress well, basic social skills and hygiene.
Using a tiny bit of common sense when looking up PUA helps a lot
>Pick up artist
Stop watching this shit, you're being brainwashed. Go outside and meet a lot of people, actually meet people who like the same stuff as you and talk to them, be less shy to compliment (this is very important), be daring to ask for a date with someone.
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