My gf told me some guy tried to flirt with her. She shut him down instantly but it still hurts. I often feel like Im losing her only to realize that I was just being too intense about our relationship, also weve been apart for most of the summer which makes things harder on me. I think its because she was my first gf. How do I calm down?
I dont really want to talk to her about it because I dont wanna seem insecure. I hate myself for being such a pussy but goddamn I feel so fucking shitty.
>being jealous of some dude getting shut down Insecurity is the mind killer.
I know, I wish someone would just shoot me in the face Im so pathetic
And why do I care that she stopped leaving read receipts? She was the one who asked me to turn mine on the first place and I thought it was weird of her to care now I suddenly give a shit?
>How do I calm down? Fuck her like there's no tomorrow. Cause there probably isn't with her.
What makes you say that?
Read the OP.
>Being a self-admitted pussy >She telling OP she got hit on by another guy >First girlfriend >OP not knowing how to talk to her about it >OP not knowing how to deal with it >OP feeling like he's losing her.
Rarely, but it does happen, a guy will try to flirt with a random girl. However, it is highly likely OP's gf either knows this guy already or was in a situation that invited flirtatious banter. She got the attention she wanted, perhaps she shut it down eventually, but it wasn't immediately and it wasn't unexpected.
user for the love of god don't be like this, my girlfriend has the same irrational insecurity and it has drove us apart and no matter how hard I try it seems almost unfixable
you have to live a life you can be proud of.
gym, job you love, time for hobbies, love your girl
realize that it probably happens to her daily by a bunch of different dudes. if she cute, guys will try
This. If you gf is something like a solid 7/10 or above she will probably be hit on by guys, catcalled and starred at every single day of her life. If she mentions casually in a conversation that she has a bf thats fine, although some guys will continue to flirt with her, not respecting the idea that she is happy with someone.
Anyways, that is the sad reality for women. Im 25 and had 4 major relationships, and in 3 of those relationships my gfs were the object of flirtatious banter in a weekly or daily basis, in every single context you can think of
Why do you feel shitty user? You will survive a breakup. Don't worry about losing her. Only focus on your mission in life. The moment you try and solve it from the inside the moment you lose.
Where is the problem? I mean, for example, some girls have tried to flirt with me and I've never told it to my gf. She's been honest with you, that's all.
I seriously doubt it happens to her daily, it does me, so one guy trying isn't even worth a mention to my bf. Since no guy ever tries this is a big deal for her and needed to tell somebody.
I can usually see a guy is going to try and can avoid him before he opens his mouth. If its someone I know or in a situation he is up close like in a queue I have a look (pity and digust work best) that shuts them down cold. Catcalls do happen but I never look their way.
Why don't you open up for other guys? Most women are hypergamous.
It was a friend of her friend, some alcoholic girl Im really trying, I know its wrong but its hard to fix Youre right
Thank you guys, I guess I just needed a reality check. I talked to her and I feel a lot better
>Most women You guys just kill me you are so simpleminded.
I'm not interested in them. That simple
Whenever I've been interested in a guy, like my bf, he will know. The rest are wasting my time and space.
>some alcoholic girl I thought you said it was some guy
>It was a friend of her friend How convenient, so her friend gives cover so your gf can party and be close to this guy who will naturally speak to those around him.
Why was she out with this guy in the first place?
Women getting hit on by men and sometimes women isn't a problem for women. The problem for women is when they get hit on by someone they don't like. >If you gf is something like a solid 7/10 or above she will probably be hit on by guys A legit 7/10 or less will still get hit on by guys, but just not as many from my experience. Average to less than average men will automatically disqualify themselves from attempting to talk let along flirt with a legit 7/10 woman. Those men will think that a 5/10 or less woman will appreciate them more. Plus, their barometer of what is considered a 7/10 woman tends to be messed up. Sure, men will look and maybe catcall a woman, but those scenarios alone rarely lead to a woman giving a man her number.
The issue here for this user is her desire or need to tell him about it.
You can't control when or who will take an interest in your partner. Just accept that some people won't respect boundaries, and will selfishly pursue "taken" people.
What you CAN do, however, is be proud of your girlfriend for having the respect, for both herself and you, and being satisfied in her relationship, to reject people's advances. Mine wasn't, and relentlessly flirted with anyone who'd flirt with her. Be happy that she has common decency.
Also, work on your insecurity as soon as possible. Talk to your girlfriend, tell her you're struggling and want to stop feeling insecure and more confident. Get a therapist if need be. Most of all, just recognize that your insecurity is your problem and yours alone. Not her's. If you don't work on it, it IS going to be the death of your relationship.
i will pursue a girl even if shes taken, but only if she is showing interest back ,not my fault the relationship is dead on their part
the bro code is bullshit, incels who are insecure thought of it