Fear of being alone

Is there any name for or is it a known disorder that people CAN’T function or find happiness without a S.O?

I keep getting the feeling that despite being 7/10 looks wise and 6/10 personality wise, there are so few people who relate to me and are “on my level” that I will almost CERTAINLY be alone for the rest of my life.

I’ve had long term GF’s, but now that I’m so old (29) my outlook just looks hopeless for love. I have no joy in ANYTHING in this world, I have no drive, no purpose, no friendship just nothing. I can’t wait to die. I wake up every day hoping it’s my last.

What is this?

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If you can't love yourslef how the hell are you gonna love somebody else.
Being in a relationship will not give you any happienes and will not make you feel better only worse if you're not already happy with yourslef.

Why does literally EVERYBODY say this shit. That’s like saying you can’t cook what you’re allergic to. Just cuz I can’t eat it doesn’t mean I can’t provide it. FFS

What does it mean to love yourself?! That makes no GODDAMN SENSE. I can tell myself I’m good looking, funny, strong, y’all etc but what the FUCK does it matter when you go out into the world and test these delusions??? Exactly.

What does “love yourself” fucking mean??? I can’t understand this shit.

It means don't delude yourself, accept yourself as you are and then work on better yourself if you want to.
You will never find someone that loves you for you if you can't do the same for yourself.

That’s. Retarded.

You’re telling me that if there were NO friends in your life, NONE, you’d be doing some solitary activity and telling yourself “yep, this is fine?”

>What is this?
It used to be called codependency and now that has all been lumped under the 'Addictive personality' sector of OCD behavior.

Yep.
When you're happy with the person who you are every moment of your live, being completely alone or with friends, is just as pleasent and fulfilling.

Again that is just retardedly delusional.

So if you were in some sort of purgatory, shit is still peachy? Oh what’s that? You have to DO things and find joy to be happy? Hm, that’s a surprise

My purgatory is that nothing in this world excites me, interests me, drives me, satisfies me. I am stranded in desolateness. I’ve been a mechanic for 15 years, gone rock climbing, bowling, hiking, to the beach, flown RC, gone to bars and parties, hiked across Mexico, visited more than a dozen US states and yet here I am still feeling that I don’t desire to do any of these things again. They were unsatisfying, unfulfilling, in my opinion they were pointless. But everybody keeps telling me to try new shit. To make matters worse, many of those things cost money. Not gym membership money, more like work and live with mom and only buy food so I can afford this pointless activity that “makes me happy” type money.

I pray I don’t live much longer. God let me out of here

Don't rely on others for happiness.
Everyone dies or disappears eventually.
The only constant in this world is you.

Proving my point, nothing will ever feel fulfiling and satisfying to you, not even a relationship, especially not a relationship until you find a way to accept and appreciate just yourself.

That's bullshit. I became happy and satisfied with myself thanks to my gf

Bingo! Same thing in my case (I’m OP)

My GF gave me a reason to strive and develop and a goal. She had abusive parents that broke us up or else I’d be married by now.

Nothing before or after her was even the slightest bit fulfilling.

Actually now that I think about it, food is the ONLY thing that can fulfill any part of me now and I’m trying hard to resist that while being idle and depressed. Point is, how does somebody just switch their brain on and start liking their “self” (and by extension, accept being isolated for the rest of their life) as if to say “gee I never thought of that”

I'm happy that happened to you. Having somone loving and supporting you can definitelty help you achive happines and become satisfied with yourself.
I am saying that seeking a relationship just as a band aid for all of your issues and thinking it will change everything is not healty and productive.

Bullshit.

Humans are... you know... social animals.

Our happiness is greatly affected by our social circle. Feeling lonely is a very legit cause of unhappiness.

And being 29 I see my options DWINDLING. It’s not bad enough it was minuscule to begin with. Now I’ve gone from a single-digit percentage of the local population to less and less and people within my age group are being snapped up, divorced, have kids, have hit the wall etc etc.

If I knew this very day by some divine message that I would be single for the rest of my life, I couldn’t swallow pills fast enough to get out

You can always target some desperate single mom. If you can't even land a single mommy then i have no advice for you anymore.

I have been in the position of having that opportunity practically handed to me. Nah

I'm on the same boat as you OP, in fact this is my thread: and even though the circumstances are different apparently, I still understand how you feel because I feel exactly like that as well now that I am alone
Only being with her gave me a sense of fulfillment and purpose, now there's just void
I'm sorry that this reply is in itself empty advice-wise since I can unfortunately not tell you what to do because up to now nothing has worked for me, so I'm trying to figure that one out myself
I will however bump your thread because I am also interested in something someone might say about this, should they shed some light on the matter
I'm afraid the quality of the replies thus far has been extremely low though, as most don't even seem to get what the fuck you're saying, so I won't get optimistic myself
Best of luck anyway

You and me are exactly the same down to the age.

To expand I'm trying prayer but it always comes back to loneliness. Can I do this for 50 years? If i last that long. I get angry at seeing couples. I'm also balding which severely crippled my search. I also want a decent lady but they're mostly taken.

But I also realize that relying on a wife or something to make me happy is a fatal mistake. The wife can die, pass away, cheat etc. But once my parents are gone, i will be alone. Not much left for me in this world that stimulates me.