Jow Forums designs a field ration

What should go in an MRE?

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1 dick shaped can of bread

cum brownie

tendies

Vitamin, Crackers, coffee, pack of smokes and a bic lighter.

and to top it all off a condom and a few spare bullets

1/10 is just empty witha weight in it so you don't realize it until you get fucked over.

vodka

Lube
...for weapons.

Did he just drink that cigarette drag?

>Nothing but ammo,peanut butter,beef jerkey, ramen,iodine pill and vitamin pill.
Use ammo to hunt game
Decommission excessive ammo to spark a fire to cook oil out of peanut butter to lube your gun and eat left over peanut butter. Iodine pill for gallons of water you're heating up to sterilize.
Beef jerkey,ramen, vitamin pill for meal replacement.

The lack of any real alcohol, tobacco, and caffeine in MREs is a real morale killer.
I mean, sure, you don't want your fucking grunts hoarding shooters and getting blind drunk in the middle of the day but a fucking cheapo cigarette or something goes a long way for people who like them.

I would say that there should be special morale MREs evenly distributed. I know plenty of teetotalers and sober assholes who could've gotten an extra packet of mashed potatoes if this system were in place.

That's a solo survivalist MRE.

Wait, no caffeine? Do they not pack coffee in MREs anymore?

nothing but coffee, chocolate, and cigarettes

Some vitamin supplements, crackers, a self-heating 1000 kcal meal, cigarettes, jam, coffee, vacuum dried fruits, matches, plastic cutlery and some juice

Pretzels, beef jerky, Gatorade powder, almonds and a multivitamin.

Equal parts meat and carbs, with some veggies and candy on the side. Maybe a hearty stew, sphaghetti, or some other hearty food

4000 calories of Scho-Ka-Kola

Freeze dried entrees and sides to reduce weight, iodine tabs to sterilize water, cigarettes, waterproof matches, an 8oz bottle of denatured alcohol for alcohol stove, caffeine gum, some Gatorade mix to replenish electrolytes, salt, pepper, toilet paper, coffee, some breakfast meals like oatmeal or those bridgeford meals, firestart tabs, etc.

Doritos, whiskey, a steak and a hot waifu poster.

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A dragon dildo, an 8th of some dank, cum brownies, vodka, and one 9mm bullet for when you pathetic autists inevitably pull off your exit strategy

Gin, lots of gin

Just be sure to re-label it as an "EMERGENCY BOWEL MOVEMENT BAR" and include instructions not to eat it until shortly before you're capable of sitting down to shit.

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Just Pervitin
A lot of it.

>inhaling
>drinking
Pick one

One forty-five caliber automatic
- Two boxes of ammunition
- Four days' concentrated emergency rations
- One drug issue containing antibiotics, morphine,
vitamin pills, pep pills, sleeping pills, tranquilizer pills
- One miniature combination Russian phrase book and Bible
- One hundred dollars in rubles
- One hundred dollars in gold
- Nine packs of chewing gum
- One issue of prophylactics
- Three lipsticks
- Three pair of nylon stockings.

youtube.com/watch?v=vPwW7RaPO_g

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crayons, glue, can of copenhagen winter green, monster energy, marlboro reds and a sick call slip

Salami sausage, pepperoni sausage, crackers, and a non-melt candy bar.

> tiny sample of caviar, like ketchup pack size
> 1 pack of ramen, but it's been powdered back into flour
> a mexican spoon candy
> 9 condoms that have been inexplicable unwrapped and turned inside out
> a fig
and a kilogram of cocaine

>exhaling

When you are thirsty you don't drink a coke an spit it back out don't you?

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>a fig
Of the anime variety? That will be a good morale booster.

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i thought about calling you nasty but look what im posting

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my man.

This guy gets it. Time to stay awake for 1000 years.

Freeze Dried goods that can be eaten strait out of bags as a snack, as well as reconstituted with water to make meal

All Meats are precooked, just heat up for enjoyment.

Bacon strips Bag
Beef Chunks Bag
Chicken Chunks Bag
Pilot Bread Can
Peanut Butter Packets
Shreaded Cheese Bag
Strawberry Slices Bag
Blueberries whole Bag
Cranberries whole Bag
Chicken Broth Powder Packets
Beef Broth Powder Packets

Vegetable Mix A: Peas, Corn, Carrots.

Vegetable Mix B: Tomatoes, Onions, Celery.

Vegetable Mix C: Carrots, Sweet Potatoes, Onions.

Oatmeal Packet

Honey Packets

Sugar Packets

Salt Packets

Pepper Packets

Nutmeg Packets

Cinnamon Packet

Jam/Jelly Packets

Cornbread Muffin Cube Vaccum Packed

Hawaiian Roll Vaccum Packed.

Coffee, Tea, Hot Coco, Lemonade, Orange Drink Mix.

Powdered Eggs Mix Packet

Survival Candy Bars.

Accessories:

Individual mini dental floss pack and a pair of heavy duty plastic tooth picks.

Sugar Free chewing gum.

Large Napkin/Paper Towel

Smaller Dedicated Toilet Paper Packs

Long handle spoon.

Tooth Powder packet and mini soap bar with compressed sponge and tooth brush*


Matches
All packets of a type are in waxed boxes for extra crush protection and to contain leaks should one item be compromised.

Whole ration is in a tough plastic pack like a typical MRE but has an oragazation car board tray insert so all the packets don't just spill out like a mess when you cut open the bag.


Tooth brush is meant for one use teeth cleaning and then rinsed thouroughly and then used for gun cleaning.

The chili mac MRE is perfect.

I piss stronger coffee than the shit I got from an MRE.

>Fiber bar
>Electrolyte drink mix or Coffee mix that isn't weak as fuck
>3 cigarettes
>Matchbook
>Vitamin pills
>Crackers or Biscuits
>Dehydrated mashed potatoes
>Flameless ration heater (Pic related)
>Main course
Different MRE styles would have different main courses;
>Shredded Beef and peppers
>Chicken thigh pesto
>Cheese Ravioli Tortellini (Tomato sauce on the side)
>Baked Salmon with Garlic
>Chili and beans
>Chili and Macaroni
etc...

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Based fuckin Mike Nolan, can't wait for the next big lez episode

4 pounds of spam and a quarter pound of instant coffee

Hey, man, tell that to the guy in OP's pic.

Some Norwegan salted cod with baked potatos

For the Portuguese bros out there

>mfw eating that for dinner at 7PM in a hot as fuck Syrian town

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Chinese MRE best MRE

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1. Tendies
2. Onahole
3. Doritos
4. Rockstar drink
5. Vodka
6. Sailor Moon Stockings
7. Diet Sausage
8. Shit tier weed, 1 blunt
9. Waifu Pillow Case
10. Packet of "Birth Control", inside is a mirror
11. Can of Tourist's Delight
12. sriracha sauce
13. Student debt hotline advertisement
14. Axe body spray, 1 oz.
15. Laxitive gum
16. Baby wipes
17. Mayo pack

Brownies.

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Combos, cigarettes, jerky, multivitamin, and lubriderm

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Vodka and preworkout

Bread pudding

Beef jerky

This but add one clearly marked separately packaged cyanide pill. You ever know when life just isn't worth it anymore.

Cigarettes. Bring back cigs in MRES. Also, spam. Nothing but spam. liquor.

you don't actually expect Jow Forums to plan anything around functioning in a group.

no seriously. you don't.

Step 1, aquire french RICR
And thats it

cum lube and a single .50bmg

not one of you assholes said hot sauce. 0/10 would not share a foxhole with.

Welp, we know the rules. Rolling for instant coffee.

Nice.

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>What should go in an MRE?

multivitamin,powdered potato, freeze dried bacon, cigarettes, matches chocolate and coffee

A can of beets
A sack of rolling tobacco and papers
Matchbook
Really shitty instant coffee
A tin of opium for the day that you're shot and bleeding in a foxhole and have to fight the pain
Pervitin pills for emergencies
Gun show jerky

pervitin
a tube of wasabi
mountain dew gamer fuel TM
kinder eggs

Champagne?

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Taylor Swift's butthole.

Jow Forums super fantastic 24.5 hour one man field ration

BREAK-FIST
>jack links beef jerky stick [teryaki]
>mixed N U T S
>meal of oats
>instacoffeeeee
LAUNCH
>pizza fucking combos
>orange drank
>shelf stable bread
>mre McRib in heater pack
DIN DIN
>grape drank
>spaghetti AND meatballs
>acheivement of man that is shelf stable garlic bread
>chocolate bar
Misc
>crackers
>jam
>shitterhole whipes
>altoids original minican


.5 hour is you eat the solid log of shit football that will come out of your ass

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crab legs

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>Denatured alchahol without vodka or equiv
You're gonna have troops dropping like flies

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1 can of nugget food, 1 pint clear gin, 3 ramen flavor packets, 2 wet wipes for cleaning the chastity cage

Jesus Christ, I know your pain.
I made the mistake of eating one from a vending machine at work once, never again.

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I'd include a little pack of like 5 trading cards, with erotic pinup models on it. There'd be a huge variety of modern stars, vintage models, and even hentai.

Marine?

Underrated

>Hearty food
Yes daddy

Daddy's cummies and cherry flavored lube.

Every ration pack comes with three cigars and a disposable cigar cutter

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You know nothing, MREs used to come with a smoke

Pervitin, turnips, potatos, ryebread, crispbread, dried fish, porrigde, pack of cigarettes and shot of vodka.

Package would be labeled "PERKELE"

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>Crackers / Hard Tack
>Rice
>Freeze Dried Vegetables and Meat
>Canned Vegetables and Meat
>Coffee
>Tea
>Sugar
>Chocolate
>Powdered electrolyte drink
>Lollies
>Matches
>Condensed Milk
>KFC hand wipes
>soup packet

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>toilet paper

You don't want those, you want baby wipes. They clean your ass much better and you can use one to sanitize your hand afterwards. They also double as dry baths.

All these tobaco fags need to fuck the hell off.

Pervitin, vodka, cigs, crispbread and porridge ought to be more than enough.

piss, shit, dick, cum, pussy. fart, smegma, dick cheese, ass hole lint, the hair directly from an asshole, bleach, dragon dildo, afg, vfg, bipod, tripod, and a heaping serving of chili mac n cheese please

What you should put in.

>Beef Jerky
>Skittles
>Something that's filling.
>Multivitamin

What you shouldn't put in.

>Caffeine
>Tobacco
>"Packets" of shit like sugar

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Underrated

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>what you shouldnt put in
>doesn't even list alcohol or some sweeet ass go pills

Yeah you're a faggot who doesn't understand what dudes out in the field need.

>became one of the first Finns to overdose on speed

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Unironically this

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Tendies are fucking must-have.