/meg/ - Military Enlistment General

Good luck with that. You think Drill Sergeants haven't smoke weed and know what it looks like. It's not like R. Lee Ermey. They weren't just born as Drills. You're fucking retarded kiddo.

>he thinks you get giggles and jump out of windows
this isn't reefer madness, faggot. and this isn't my first joint during shop class.

Dude. Before I joined the Army I smoked daily. I was concerned I was going to fail at MEPS. I know how to handle weed but I also know exactly what it looks like when someone is stoned, even when I'm sober. You are actually an idiot. Though I do honestly wish you luck. I specifically remember during basic wishing I was stoned, it would have made a lot of parts way more fun.

So the idea of enlisting has been in my head awhile, however I feel scared about enlisting and dedicating my life to something I currently don't feel 100% committed too, should I continue my slight interest or should I stop and come back to it later if I'm feeling more enthusiastic about it? I haven't talked with a recruiter yet but I've spoken with various family members who've served, so I feel like even though it's not direct there's implied pressure on me to enlist due to family traditions.

Could you guys help me figure this one out? Thanks.

>I could tell my pothead friend was high while he was drooling in front of the t.v. next to his bob marley poster
you must be an expert

It's your ass, man. You really need pot that bad?

Yeah that's all I did while I smoked weed. Whatever dude, You are a waste of time. Best wishes to you. I'm just trying to give you useful advice. If you don't want it then that's on you.

it makes shitty and boring jobs tolerable so why wouldn't I? sorry I'm not double digit iq and can be entertained by counting blades of grass or talking about the walking dead

Asked this last thread, but just to confirm:
-Is there any swimming involved in Air Force basic? If there is, will they teach me how to swim?

-As far as specific jobs go, I was going for Airborne Linguist, someone last thread said that involves swimming at some point, another user pointed out that they would teach me how. I'm probably autistically overthinking this but would it be a dealbreaker if I can't swim or can't learn? Is that part of the Airborne PT test or something? I don't want to go all that way just to fail because I have no idea what I'm doing in water. At what point would this come up as far as tech school or w/e?

Much appreciated guys. I figured if I picked Air Force/Army I'd never have to swim but I guess perhaps not lol.

How competitive are infantry slots for OCS?

Air Force MEPS had me list a top 5 wishlist of where I'd like to be stationed after basic/tech school. Is that bullshit or am I actually guaranteed one of those places? I know it depends on job which is what I don't understand, how can they guarantee that shit if my job isn't even guaranteed?

>LYING ABOUT MEDICAL HISTORY = GOOD
>LYING ABOUT CRIMINAL HISTORY = THEY KNOW

Anyone know if this rule of thumb holds for Britbongs? The FAQ says doctors should be lied to, but to what extent can this be got away with? I have a mild congenital heart condition, its all but asymptomatic and neither I nor anyone observing me exercising would know I have anything all were it not for a doctor saying so. As far as I can tell, a medical examination consists of just getting checked out naked by a doctor, should be similar across both sides of the pond. Again, my health is perfectly fine, but my concern is that either it's common practice to pull up any medical records, in which case I'm likely out of luck, or that the medical examiner will hear a slight heart murmur and, rather than simply decide that my body seems to be in perfect working order and move on, will then pull up medical records or examine further, in which case I'm also most likely out of luck. There's also the possibility that I pass any medical examination through lying and a doctor deciding a heart murmur isn't worth chasing up further, but then require a vaccination sometime later, or get injured, and then medical records get pulled up and I get fucked for fraudulent enlistment.

I can't imagine honesty, with the hope that they'll decide "yes, you have it, but no, we don't care because it doesn't impact you - you're in" is the best policy, though perhaps if recruitment is a struggle at the time, or I come packing a STEM degree, a level of individual judgement could come into play. What are your guys' thoughts here? Am I fucked as far as any hope of joining is concerned?

if you have to ask it's not happening

>if you have to ask it's not happening
this
you need to start getting unfucked my man

I'm just wondering where it ranks with respect to the other branches. For example I've heard that MI is highly desired and tends to have fewer slots.

Signed a 19D contract yesterday, what can I expect for day to day life once I get to my unit.

Sup Jow Forums
A co 1/19 here
AMA

is buds easier than sfas?

Yes but you become gay when you join the navy.

>Current 11B here. I will answer any questions you might have on this drunken barracks living Friday night.
What's it like being infantry during peacetime and never getting your CIB/patch? Also why are you a massive faggot?

>Signed a 19D contract yesterday, what can I expect for day to day life once I get to my unit.
Anal sex. And before you get too excited, you'll be catching not pitching.

>gay operator
>heterosexual non operator
I will take my chances

Oh and by the way what anime did I miss over the last two months?

I’m into that anyway

any tips of passing the hearing test?

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im a leaf btw, idk if the test is different in the states

I want to join 10th mountain
Whats life like there and how do I make that happen?

>Sorry I’m not double digit iq

Yeah, I understand being down there in the single digits is a real bitch. Maybe shoving a crayon up your nose like Homer Simpson will get you up into the low doubles.

It’s nice up here in triple digit land.

Let me guess 50 lbs over
Or weaselly little holocaust survivor
Either way enjoy separation and good riddance fuckboy

You get slain and get paid. Youll hate it but its an experience you wont get anywhere else. Consider reserves.

Just go to a local pool and have the lifeguard unfuck your breast stroke.

Check this out maybe it will help you maybe it won't but this guys channel helped me a lot with my decision
youtu.be/6sELsODfgWk

how much will needing glasses fuck me over in trying to get into high speed shit (rangers, ranger qualified, seals, etc)

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80% of my platoon in basic was on Ranger contracts, and most of the rest were on SF contracts. They just gave us BCGs with zero fucks.

good exactly what i was hoping for, thanks user

At about what speed do you run at bootcamp? Is it a full blown sprint or a jog?
I can run 2.5 miles in 20 min at 7.5 kph
>inb4 commie metric units
Thats what the treadmill says

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Stop worrying about fucking swimming because some random mentioned it. You're fine.
Also are you black? How is water this much of a deal breaker?

For Marines you do sprinting a lot and normal running but usually it doesn't matter if you're slow or not, many guys will be dying and it's expected. I wouldn't worry about havinhg to sprint or jog in boot, it has no bearing on anything really as you're not graded on it.

Pussyfaggot blogpost incoming:
I have been doing research for a couple of months now and was all gunho about enlisting. I told my friends and they all tried to talk me out of it. They said the political climate is to volatile, especially if you're planning on staying in for more than 4 years. Every one I've told ensures me war is around the corner and now I'm having doubts.

Am I just a gigantic pussy with shitty friends? Or does everyone have this feeling prior to enlisting? Does bootcamp give you the confidence to be ready for combat or is it once a mega faggot, always a mega faggot?

Dont combat arms. It's really that simple. All bootcanp does is get you in shape. Won't stop you from being a little bitch

get a load of this guy

why are you taking the oath and wasting everyones time, only to back out? i don't even want you I hope nobody else does.

O-oh, g-g-great...

I'm shipping for navy boot camp soon and I fucked my shoulder up if it doesn't get better but i still get through the pushups on the test, should I be okay? I'm going to try and hide it as best as I can.

What is your problem?

Your friends are retarded and don't know a damn thing. They're worse than armchair generals and basing this off of reddit posts most likely.
Don't worry about combat shit

yes, pass the pushups and yorue good. Rate?

IT

Is DS Strauch still there?

Ayyy Corry fag. Have fun dude Corry us actually cool

Good rate, make sure you go to a ship first not shore

350F here, AMA.

>cw3 reservist
>GS11 security manager
>former 35P/N/F E6 when i was active duty

I know a bit about everything, intel, gov jobs, security shit, gun shit, etc. Finally figured out why I couldnt post anymore, and it was because when i got back from baf,and my network switched back to normal plan, everytime i went on Jow Forums it went on http instead of https. Couldnt load the fucking captchas.

It feels bad man.

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For example, if you happen to get imagery intel job, theres like 4 places you could end up going to. If your wishlist happens to coincide, then you will more than likely go there. Air force and navy are the only ones ive seen where the wishlist actually works.

Fyi, you will be offered recruiter assistance program, take it. Being a air force recruiter is different than the other branches. You only really report to work when they need bodies to go to an event or a school. Also, little known fact, you can opt into the program once a year, EVERY year. Its like a 30 day vacation to go back home. Friend i know recruited out of germany, so he got to go chill over there for a month.

If you are going fo

If you are going for air crew, you will HAVE to go to SERE. And you will definitely be swimming there.

My thoughts: Recruiters don't want to find anything wrong, they more warm bodies -- blood for the blood god etc. So let's say the UK is as Orwellian as it's portrayed and he can see your NHS recrods somehow. That means you will be asked to leave? I don't see them pursuing any legal action against you (See a lawyer or... barrister(?) first if this is a real concern). If you get rejected during medical screening, then you'll again just be sent home.

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I'm on Sandhill Pass, what should I do?

Anyone go 17c? Is it possible to get airborne/Ranger school with a 17c contract?

So, you want to sign a 5 year contract, where 3 years of which, you will be treated as an initial entry trainee?

Have fun with that.

my long-term military goal is to become an officer (and ultimately 'retire' into the civillian sector) torn between 35L/M and 15W. Which of the three would you say are most instrumental in taking down targets? I would like to end up at Fort Bragg or somewhere similar with like-minded mission oriented teammates.

If they even suspect it you'll be given a probable cause UA. When I was in basic there was a nig with droopy eyes (he wasn't even doing drugs) and they gave him UAs all the time.

Any new MOS's coming out soon?

If it doesn't get found out the moment you inprocess then your bros will make sure you get kicked out real fast for attempting to be a stoned deadweight.

Unless you go combat arms, SOF, or aviation you'll never have to worry about being within 100 miles of any kind of firefight.

"I only regret that I have but one life to lose for my country." words we all heard in elementary school, yet words that strike me at my core when i look at all the warrior paths available.

Faggot.

thanks i bet you have a cute ass

17c is a great gig what are you going on about?
Idk about ranger or anything for it or why you'd even do that but the mos is a solid choice

350F here.

Well...for one you wont be doing any humint as an officer. You dont need to be an officer unless you want to go the full 20+, which you shouldnt for that career field.

Go in as a 35L, if its still entry level, otherwise go 35M with the goal of becoming a 35L. Get at least 5 years as a 35L, then transition to reserves or guard, depending on what state you live in. If plan is to work around DC, go reserves, it has more opportunities for intel than NG. When you do switch over, either decide to switch to officer, or continue on as a 35L. Depends on what job area you ultimately decide to make your way in. If you go officer, you are moving toward the strategic side of things. If you keep on the counter intel agent route, you could keep that up forever. Like I said, it depends on where you want to end up, but thats way down the line. You might end up saying fuck it all and become a hobo after 3 years lmao.

Also, dont worry about specific bases. Bases dont determine quality of coworkers. Think of it like mcdonalds, not every mcdonalds is the same. Sometimes the good mcdonalds never has their mcflurry machine running.

17C has some of the longest training out of any of the MOS, which takes up about a year. Presumably the other two years is ranger-specific.

What are the most useful MOS's for the civilian world?

1+ year of training, another 2 years training and getting treated like shit until you earn some salt(with regiment).

The majority of them?

Learn basic admin and manager skills in almost all of the jobs. So you could pretty much get any entry level office job.

FYI, if you want an instant job with good benefits, just be a TSA agent if you have zero work exp or education, or if you do, then be a customs officer.

i'm currently an airborne linguist, have been in for awhile now. aircrew only really requires you not to be colorblind. they test for this annually. if you're colorblind you can't be aircrew, they will find out. also you need to be able to "valsalva", i.e. pop your ears positively (shoot air out of your ears, not suck air in). during SERE you go through water survival training which isn't focused on your ability to swim but you should learn how to, it'll help... they will give you a special color helmet if you tell them you're bad at swimming so they keep a close eye on you. water survival teaches you how to swim with a team to a life raft from plane wreckage. the rest of water survival training is with assisting flotation devices. there's no other water requirements for aircrew or otherwise, but you might accidentally fall in one of the many rivers you come across during the woodlands portion of SERE. just learn how to swim bro, go to your local pool and tread water in the shallow section.

this is all a non-sequitor if you can't pass through DLI, i.e. language school. language school is going to be the hardest mental challenge you experience in your career, and really your life, bar none. you shouldn't be worrying about something like treading water right now. if you want to become an airborne linguist, the biggest challenge is the language. when i went through basic training we selected 6 languages from a list of languages, and a language was chosen for me, so don't start studying a language now in prep for DLI. the languages you can pick from aren't fun like german, japanese, etc. they're languages of our country's enemies.

aircrew fundamentals, DLI, goodfellow, and SERE in that order, then wherever you get stationed. 2 years and some change of training. if you go the airborne linguist route, stop going on Jow Forums when you hit DLI, make as many friends as you can at DLI, and you'll set yourself up for a great career.

Ah including the ranger nonsense
Well like I said idk why you'd do 17c but then want to be a ranger. Very different roles

Nah, different user, I was the one who initially said why would anyone want to be a trainee for 3 years.

Hahaha thanks for the advice. My goal is indeed to end up on the strategic side of things, but like you inferred, I could always just end up washing out so i'm trying not to get too far ahead of myself. I have a general grasp- a logical inference if you will - of what counter intel and strategic planning would entail, however as a civilian my knowledge is still at best a meme.
Also, I was saying Fort Bragg as a euphemism for delta or whatever units get to take part in clandestine/important/neat-o objectives.
Contracting around the DC area would be very well suited long-term goal, certainly a wise financial goal- at least for my tastes. Again, I just don't know because calculated nature aside, I'm just another recruit who has only been exposed to the world and literature watered down for civilian consumption.

350F again.

Like I said, aim for 35L. You can always go officer route later on, you cant do the opposite. BTW, the other services have their own CI programs, the reason why you should go army over them, is because for now, 35L is entry level. And even back when it wasnt, the requirements for reclassing into it are easier than the other services. Navy and Air Force combine their CI program with their LEO program. Army separates them, which is great if you want to just focus on CI and humint work.

Also, gonna sound like an old soldier, but you dont need to be delta to do your job and make shit happen. I was group support, and yes I got to do the coolest shit a 35F could ever hope to do in my career field, but I have done more as a reservist and a civilian to affect big picture shit, than I ever did or could have hoped to do active duty. So do your job the best you can, and dont worry about trying to go for specific units. Especially if you want to end up on the strategic side. Being tied to specific units keeps you closed off from the rest of the military.

Contracting....dont even get me started on that shit show. You DO NOT want to be a contractor, when federal employment is an option, and you want to make a career. Contracting are for those who need quick money, cant get a clearance, or need to support habits be it family or otherwise. Contracting has zero benefits, unless you need a temp job fast.

What specifics do you want to know? As most anons on this board know, I dont mind spoonfeeding.

i'm on a major exercise, and I cant do it. im here but still crying as usual

that's it. I cant do it. i'm not competent, nor confident. I don't have this. everything goes wrong when I touch it. things I dont touch run away and slip badly. I just cant do stuff.

im sad all the time and I know exactly why

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is this that canada idiot?

I SAR Rescue Swimmer with the NAVY would be my first choice.

Much thanks, once again. I'm taking all of this as law. 35F seems like a cool MOS as i look deeper into it and 350F is most definitely a job description that "makes shit happen" I will have to come up with some more questions, but I definitely understand what you are saying.
How long did it take you to get to 350F?
At what point are you qualified to move into the civilian sector? (More specifically, did you have to make it to WO to get the civillian job you have now, or was it a choice to get out of active after getting out of it what you wanted)(or...?)
How difficult would you rate the 35F and 35L pipelines?

We have talked before and I have always appreciated your guidance. Been taking care of a family member who's about to pass for the last several months or I would have gone in when they first opened up 35L this year. Just down to the wire at this point so I'm making my final decision

>im sad all the time and I know exactly why
then fucking fix it faggot

Buddy check em. You know it is. I thought he fucked off finally.. I guess not

what do you want me to say? none of what you say is true? you're super competent and i love you?
you're sad all the time because you choose to be sad and a faggot. enough of the self pity party nonsense. either read more, or exercise more. weak pussies with no drive for self improvement or heart to fix problems - like you - are truly a modern phenomenon of so called "men" who have never been forced into a situation where they must either 'get tough or die'. grab yourself by the fucking nuts leaf, and do what you have to do to fix the things you can and get over the shit you can't. stop blaming life for the fact you barely fuckin try.

Not him but you seem really annoying. I wish 350f would not spoon feed people like you

Cool thanks for the info. If I don't have a "home" or a family to stay with would I be able to do the recruiter assistance program? Where would they send me to? Just whichever address I put down when I first enlisted? I'm currently homeless, going to basic pretty soon hopefully.

350F again.

If I had the choice between 35F and 35L, I would go 35L lol. Remember, 35F was my third mos, after failing korean language test(passed the school), getting reclassed into 35N, then picking it up as a secondary mos when I got tasked into its duties for so long. I am very good at research and summary type work, which is what made me so good in my career field. I always recommend going for the job in the general area you want to go in, then after a few years you should be able to figure out exactly what you DO NOT want to do.

Took me 9 years active duty before I made the jump. You have to practically be an E7 to put in a packet for warrant.

Buddy, you literally need 1 year of work experience in whatever specific field to land a civilian job. Hell, I could probably come up with a strictly civilian career path to get to the same job you are aiming for using the military, WITHOUT an education. Shoot, my first job was at library of congress as an admin for a year, just so i could get my foot into system and transfer to my next job which was at DIA as an analyst. Gov jobs randomly come up every year, so when you do get out, and you have shit luck, you might end up taking anything you can get. Interagency and internal hires get preference and priority hiring over any vet or disabled preference. Justo close off my career history, after I left DIA after a little over a year(bad office bad coworkers), I switched over to army and run the security program for a base.

35F is the easiest fucking intel job to get into and do. It is strictly a paperwork type job. To really get into it you got to get assigned to special units. Shit, you can do more as a civilian intel analyst for the army than you can as a enlisted analyst. The only way I could recommend going 35F is if you cant enlist as any of the other intel mos, or have a specific career path you want to follow. Ill post a really good route in another post.

Cont.

i see youve never been in an officd-- even a floating one --that has any procedure problems.

I'm not going to do this anymore. I'm not going to file nonsensically. I'm not going to replace fallen-out tabs in shitty binders. I'm not going to teach people how to operate printers. it's over. I have completely run out of caring for my fellow sailor. why should I care if someone from my shack that cant use active directory falls overboard when no one even keeps me apprised of what the other departments have asked for? why care about my job when the people that can't configure a printer start yelling about how accounts I make are all broken when the users never complain even once

i bet you i've worked much shittier jobs in life than you have kid. its your job. you are getting paid. you volunteered. its only temporary.

now i'm serious, i understand that life can be a major bitch and work can get depressing and repetitive, but you need to take a step back and realize men have accomplished much, MUCH more difficult tasks with far less to gain. you need to talk to the chaplain or whoever you need to about quitting your god damn floating office job for your mental health (like a bitch, mind you) or do the fucking job you signed up to do and get the fuck out/reclassify as soon as you can.

no matter what, quit being a bitch