Be British

Attached: 1568893195547.jpg (1024x610, 42K)

Probably because carrying around a walking stick in public would be some turbocringe. Also because I'm an American.

No one with a knife has a chance against someone behind a baseball bat unless they're throwing it.

Part and parcel.

learn mma?

So what is the right way to handle violent encounters according to British courts? Bend over and get reamed? I just can't understand how a modern legal system can sit there and think this is the right way for citizens to react. What do they want citizens to do if they don't want to die and also not go to prison?

I'd just buy one of those pens that has a knife in it. You can probably find someone to ship it to the UK.

I don't know about that. You are definitely going down if the first swing connects with enough force, but what happens if you don't? A bat is going to be at a huge disadvantage at bad breath distance.

You live in a non country. Just leave. You are better off being an illegal immigrant in the free world.

Dispense with legality immediately and arm yourself as best you can.
Who are those laws benefitting really? It takes very little to govern good people and bad people can't be governed at all.

We don't have to do it. The Brits should all be carrying bo staves if nothing else. There'd be some badass battles in the streets. I'd be thinking the UK is actually kind of awesome if they all did that.

I guess you don't get to live.

I feel bad for you bong bro. This is the price your country paid for electing retards and failing chartist rebellion.

Wrong. If both fighters are skilled similar knife guy can just trade his left hand for a distance and then he will be able to deal enough damage.

"There was never such a thing as a justice in English laws, but a lot of injustice" (c) Ned Kelly

I had a cashier at Lowe's who spoke with a thick cockney accent. They are actually leaving. It's rare to see blacks or mexicans out in the sunlight here, so, really surprised me to see a limey here.

>So what is the right way to handle violent encounters according to British courts?

From what I understand you can fight back hand to hand. Its just as soon as a weapon gets involved you instantly get ass reamed.

>I just can't understand how a modern legal system can sit there and think this is the right way for citizens to react.

I can understand it. The state wants you as powerless and demoralized as possible so that you continue to support the state out of necessity. With weapon laws, you will ALWAYS be dependent on the police system to save you from other hostile individuals with weapons, and thus this provides justification for hundreds of thousands of government jobs and for continued expansion of police powers.

Attached: big igloo doggo.jpg (1024x749, 90K)

Would be nice to see swords, shields, and other medieval weaponry get fully legalised for melee self-defence but guns remaining fully off-limits. Make for some interesting return for the old ways, save for a few gang cunts who will always play unfair because they just do.
Whatever laws and official documents will tell you, London is not British and will never be again.

>Would be nice to see swords, shields, and other medieval weaponry get fully legalised
Imagine EDCing a poleaxe

>Its just as soon as a weapon gets involved you instantly get ass reamed.
No inherently, but if you have a gun and your attacker doesn't it's going to take a lot of work to prove you were justified in shooting.

I feel bad for you bongs. As fucked up as both of our counties are at least I'm allowed to defend myself. Lose some weight and move across the pond friend. If you have a decent accent you'll be waste deep in poon

he knows how you feel bro

Attached: UK police despair.jpg (800x532, 90K)

>So what is the right way to handle violent encounters according to British courts? Bend over and get reamed?

unironically yes. have you paid any attention to current events?

independent.co.uk/news/uk/home-news/man-arrested-burglar-unconscious-home-danny-crawford-michael-carr-humberside-police-a8313726.html

>>the only legal item designed for self defense a person can carry is a rape alarm

Wrong, you can carry a knife just fine.

Attached: 0510325012.jpg (630x630, 13K)

>don't want to die
The government position is that Brits should. This has been established over and over. So any bong taking a position to stop themselves from dying in the street is a criminal, any bong that doesn't is easier to kill.

Attached: details-page-68-police-we-may-not-come-out-if-32609612.png (500x441, 140K)

>So what is the right way to handle violent encounters according to British courts
Get stabbed to death, and make sure not to bleed on your attacker, or they'll charge your family

>only legal item designed for self defense a person can carry is a rape alarm
these are illegal in some parts of Australia....

OI M8, U GOT A LOISCENSE FOR DAT KNOBBLYSTICK

Ran around all day today in nothing but gym shorts with a big OTF knife in my pocket. Fucking hell, maybe America’s not so bad.

Attached: 8977C086-83B3-4BAF-96EE-78AF2277EBA4.gif (320x180, 1018K)

Yeah our self defence laws are shite and with mudslime migrants gibbsing across the channel and chavs gearing up for fights it's going to get worse.
t. Bong worker who's checkout demands Id for a fucking latte spoon

Our laws are a joke. I get around them by ignoring them where I can without being massively obvious.

Here's the easy fix retard, it's what I've been doing for years
IF YOU FEEL YOUR LIFE IS IN DANGER GOING SOMEWHERE CARRY A GOD DAMN WEPON
you fucking cucks
"But what if I get my ass reemed by the law"
Then you fight it in court
Better to be alive in a courtroom than fucking dead
Just carry a weapon

If your too much of a faggot to carry an actual wepon and want to bend over to the law here's some options

Wear a heavy backpack and just sprint at the attacker it's surprising effective if the don't have a wepon and your not a weak shit

Get a large thick steel ruler from a mortise guage (I think that's what they are called they have a groove running down the middle)

Literally just start a rock collection and pick up a new rock whenever you go somewhere (maximum grug points)

I live in a shitty area and before I stopped giving a shit and started carrying all three of thiese have worked for me
Smacking a cunt in the side of the head with a good fist sized rock that fits right in the hand feels fucking great as does knocking a bunch of rowdy boomers over like bowling pins

Absolutely wrong.

They trigger nearby rape victims into remembering or something?

>otf knife
based jack bauer

>be australian
>its already happening to us
Violent revolution when

Attached: 1568069815222.jpg (960x960, 128K)

Develop a limp and carry a cane... with a nice fat heavy brass handle.

Daily reminder that immigrants commit violent crime at a significantly lower rate than the native population.

Sweden proves otherwise, Mohammed.
bbc.com/news/world-europe-45269764

>legal immigrants

fixed that for you, mr fact dodging leftist

>Carry a big black scary knife at work
>Manager sees it and asks about it when I flick it open to cut a box
>Say other manager said I needed a cutter
>Oh ok
>Customers are always happy when I can cut stuff for them
>Not a single person has ever said a word

I legit feel like there is a national conscience. If I had this knife in the UK people would legit probAbly freak. It's just Gerber folder I got on sale, but here in the states it's a tool. It's so insignifiCant to anyone. It's a bit manic been up for nearly a day think

Attached: 1420800.jpg (400x400, 15K)

Fucking this. Guns are tools, same as knives. Most of my coworkers carry knives, none of our clients bat an eye because we actually use them for shit.

>be at home with your wife and three children
>someone breaks in
>they're obviously drugged up, dangerous and unpredictable
>you pick up a knife and threaten for them to leave
>they charge at you and your family
>you stab him just as many times as it takes to bring him down
>you get arrested and charged with assault or murder if he dies
This is a real thing that happens in the UK. Fucking insane.

>used to work at a dealership as the janitor
>they decide to replace all the chairs in the lobby, it falls to me to assemble all the new ones
>having nothing better to do, the new salesman volunteers to help me
>holy shit, they pack these things in a lot of plastic, it's around every surface
>Gerber.exe initiated
>slice all the plastic shit off the chair parts
>salesman looks at me wide-eyed, and goes "Dude, we're allowed to have knives, here?"
>I go "Um, yeah? This is a car dealership in the rural south. Of course we're allowed to have knives. I carry my knife, every tech out in the shop has a knife, the service writers have knives, the owner has a knife, all of our customers have knives...I think the secretary is the one person in this building who's not carrying a blade, she just borrows ours when she needs one."
>"...oh." Pulls out his Buck knife and starts slicing plastic shit off the parts of the chair he's putting together.

Anyway, I got like 10 free hex wrenches that day because every chair came with one and we only used the first two to assemble all the chairs. So that was cool.

Cricket in the case of cuck island

Attached: source.gif (245x130, 967K)

Knives are supposedly banned but criminals with knives are everywhere.
UK is out of control.

Attached: 1545154690687.webm (636x360, 2.91M)

Here's one of one of the many 'machete gangs' that roam the streets of London in brad daylight. No police in sight. I guess their cops are too busy policing """hate""" speech on Twitter.

Attached: 1558668499784.webm (406x720, 2.81M)

Sturdy umbrella.

What an abhorrent culture.

Dont joke around mate you dont know how it feels to be in their shoes. Imagine having to not only hear a rape occurring but also having to hear a RAPE ALARM at the same time.

Quarterstaff is quintessentially British.

Dat AMG doh

Imagine trying to commit another rape and suffering tinnitus because of a rape/alarm whistle.
We should ban them, they're dangerous.

Sai are really fucking big. Good luck carrying them any kind of concealed.

who cares when you'll get stabbed entering or exiting it?

Attached: 1544118062915.png (1080x2558, 414K)

Wrong

I have no sympathy for bongs considering how much they shitpost about American gun laws and shill for the grabbers. Get fucked Nigel.

how do people this fucking brainwashed and cucked actually exist? It blows my mind.

Never because you commonwealth faggots are the biggest pussies on earth.

Bringing in non-Anglos unironically saved America, Anglo culture and blood is the only reason for this cuckoldry. Even modern Germans don't get this pathetic with guns and with defense.

>attract intention by carrying a big stick for some reason
>gang of pakistani youths notice
>beat you half to death with your own stick
>wait 5 months for the NHS to reshape your concave skull
>the Indian 'doctor' botches it
Seems like a good idea.

>turns on wipers
>gets out of own car and runs away
lmao why the fuck didn't he just floor it in reverse?

Why don't you just carry a baseball bat in your car or something? If anyone asks you were going to the batting cages. That's a pretty common workaround for felons in the US.

Uh, they don't play baseball in the UK.
Cricket bat, maybe. Are there cricket batting cages?

You'll never face the legal system if you can smoke-bomb vanish out of any situation.

Gun control sucks but let's be honest here.

Attached: homiUSUK.png (890x100, 13K)

>Homicide goes down
>Rape and mugging and other violent crime goes up
The thing about statistics is that you only get the whole picture if you know what to look for.

But the rape rate in the US is higher too. And even if it wasn't, higher homicide rate is undesirable regardless.

en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Rape_statistics

Attached: rapeUSUK.png (1300x150, 17K)

Just to be clear, I'm not advocating for any gun control or demonizing gun ownership in any way. I'm not the "look I love guns but we needed common sense regulations" kind of faggot either. What I'm trying to say is that you are defending gun ownership from the wrong angle. For one, the 2nd Amendment wasn't invented to reduce homicide/rape/whatever rates. The point of 2nd Amendment is to give the people a way to protect themselves from a tyrannical government. Everything beyond that, including the ability to defend yourself from common criminals is just an added bonus. A bonus I value greatly, pretty much equally to protection from the govt, but that's just me.

Fact is, US is a pretty violent for a 1st world country. It also has extremaly high amount of guns in civilian hands. Does the latter cause the former? Maybe. Maybe not. Maybe it's just a matter of culture. Russia has much higher homicide rate despite heavy restrictions on civilian gun ownership, so do some other european countries. Frankly, I do not know and I do not care. Any personal freedom results in inevitable abuse. We have cars, so we get car accidents. We have alcohol, so we get drunk people doing stupid shit. We have dicks, so we get rapes. None of it is a viable reason to restrict those freedoms to those who use them responsibly, especially considering that guns do have a number of very important uses. The fact that many people choose not to have them is a whole different matter. So let's stop arguing over whether guns have an effect on crime and start arguing that it doesn't fucking matter, my guns are mine to keep regardless, I didn't do shit.

Attached: children.jpg (472x621, 114K)

Attached: Sheep fighting a wolf.webm (640x360, 1.47M)

But what if he died, user?
That would be bad, wouldn't it?
Better to try and calm him down
He's the same as the rest of us

>Fact is, US is a pretty violent for a 1st world country.
Majority white rural, urban and suburban areas are no more violent than similar areas in Europe.
> It also has extremaly high amount of guns in civilian hands. Does the latter cause the former? Maybe. Maybe not. Maybe it's just a matter of culture.
The answer to your question lies in statistics, and it is clear as day: the amount of firearms in civilian hands - or the amount of people who carry firearms for self defense - has no correlation at all with homicide, violence or crime in general. Leftists attempt to distort these factual truths by twisting the statistics, e.g. by talking about "firearm homicides" (as if a homicide victim would care about what method the attacker used) or by lumping together suicides by firearm and homicides by firearm, but the truth remains nevertheless unchanged: THERE IS NO STATISTICAL EVIDENCE SUPPORTING THE VIEWS PUT FORTH BY AUTHORITARIAN POWERS WHO WISH TO - AND WHO HAVE ALWAYS WISHED TO, AS THE HISTORY BOOKS WILL CLEARLY TELL ANYONE INTERESTED ABOUT POLITICAL POWER AND SOCIETAL HIERARCHIES - DISARM, SUBJUGATE AND CONTROL YOU AND YOUR DESCENDANTS FOR ALL ETERNITY.

How do we reduce gun violence in the United States to Swiss levels without removing a single non-white citizen?

You don´t. Bear in mind, however, that "reducing gun violence from level X to level Y" is not of any inherent value, since moral relativists will always find a means to further chip away at liberty by moving the goalposts - by, say, requiring a "reduction of gun violence from level Y to level Z", and so forth in absurdum.

The vast majority of Americans do not experience "gun violence" (or any other violence, for that matter), and thus there exists no political will to disarm the common man to "make the streets safer".

Just cave the niggers skull in how hard is it

But I'm not a moral relativist. Propose any method that doesn't involve gun control or homogenous cultural enforcement that will reduce the current rate of firearms death in the US to that of Switzerland in 2018. Why can't you answer this? "I don't want to" is not a valid answer, it isn't up to you and is not your choice.

>Majority white rural, urban and suburban areas are no more violent than similar areas in Europe.
People of color are not exclusive to the US.
>it is clear as day: the amount of firearms in civilian hands - or the amount of people who carry firearms for self defense - has no correlation at all with homicide
It will never be clear as day as long as US remains a 1st world country with both highest gun ownership and high homicide rate.
>Leftists attempt to distort these factual truths by twisting the statistics, e.g. by talking about "firearm homicides" (as if a homicide victim would care about what method the attacker used) or by lumping together suicides by firearm and homicides by firearm
Homicide rate isn't gun-specific nor does it count suicides as far as I'm aware. Even if it did count suicides, they are not US exclusive either.

But that's irrelevant, you're missing the point. Leave the crime angle alone. It doesn't matter. Even if we suddenly got hypothetical, objectively indefiable proof that more guns cause more deaths, it still wouldn't be a viable reason to restrict shit.

Fucking based

Attached: 1569078289627.png (600x646, 260K)

> martial arts instructor
MMA is not designed for knife defence. Using techniques found in MMA style martial arts (Judo, BJJ, Boxing) expose critical areas such as the femoral and lower abdomen. If you are looking for evasion/protection against knives you need to find a martial art that deals specifically with that weapon.

That being said, MMA is better than nothing.

I'm a martial arts instructor and one of the styles I teach is ninjutsu. We have a weapon called metsubushi, which is blinding powder (sawdust and metal filings) encased in an egg covered in wax, which is broken (within a combat technique) and then thrown into the opponents eyes.

Traditional metsubushi is illegal and will blind someone, however I have devised a non-lethal extremely effective blinding powder alternative that is legal.

In Australia, they sell Eclipse mints in a metal container that can be popped open with one thumb, but is unlikely to open by itself or accidentally. What you can do is carry an Eclipse mints metal container (or similar) and fill it with chilli powder, pepper, rice and salt. If you are threatened with a knife, all you do is pull out your mints and offer the mugger one, then pop open the hatch and throw it in his face. You can carry two for multiple attackers or in case you drop the first one.

If police stop and search you and actually open it, all you say is that it's a special blend of herbs for your meals.

The rice absorbs moisture so the mixture stays dry and doesn't clump together.

It's also extremely effective. Just always remember to throw down wind.

Attached: eclipse_mints_40g_spearmint__37260.1564446539.1280.1280.jpg (1200x1200, 135K)

>Traditional metsubushi is illegal and will blind someone, however I have devised a non-lethal extremely effective blinding powder alternative that is legal.
Is it legal to make homemade pepper spray? That is, a spicy mixture stuffed into an aerosol can?

No they fucking dont.

T. Judge

Based retard.

Video of metsubushi in action versus a knife.

It is. The trick is making an everyday object that cannot be construed as a weapon.

An aerosol can that sprays pepper is not a conceivable everyday item.

Attached: IMG_6402 (1).webm (1920x1080, 1003K)

Well excuse me for being pro-gun and arguing for gun ownership for the right reasons instead of trying to bend every ambiguous angle in my favor. You know, the thing we tend to give anti-gunners shit for.

Attached: 63129164.jpg (431x582, 73K)

And another.

Attached: IMG_6400 (1).webm (1920x1080, 716K)

> (OP)
>Dispense with legality immediately and arm yourself as best you can.
>Who are those laws benefitting really? It takes very little to govern good people and bad people can't be governed at all.

Wise words from a Jow Forumsommando

Attached: 1559329625301.jpg (839x1228, 122K)

>An aerosol can that sprays pepper is not a conceivable everyday item.
And a fucking egg filled with blinding powder is?
>exaggerated theatrics
>opponent still clearly capable of further action and still a threat
>opponent wearing eypro, thus making it impossible to determine whether it's effective or nor, completly defeating the point of the demostration, other than showing it doesn't do shit if you have eyepro, possibly just glasses
>fucking rolls
Big yikes despite the effort.

Pretty sure britain has an entirely dfferent standard for calling something a homicide than the states

>be British
>I was stabbed to death five times today
>It's illegal to speak English
>the few surviving white women are subjected to daily government-mandated rape
Nobody here, not even you yourself, believes anything you just said, so what's the point?

>Even modern Germans don't get this pathetic with guns and with defense.
I do my nigger, I do it really hard :3