Be me

'tis original greenie, user

They held a certain belief that if they smelled pestilence then they would contract the disease. They also thought if they smelled flowers that would lessen the risk of infection, therefore they stuffed flowers into the beaks of the masks.

We need The Volgun to read this, He voices SCP-049 in SCP Containment Breach.

>Tuesday
>go to king room for some early morning medecining
>nothing beats the smell of freshly drained blood at dawn
>ten more ounces of blood later, I leave to have a stroll in the castle
>impressed by the great number of precious items
>slowly a more efficient strategy to obtain sweet medieval bitcoin emerges in my mind
>start collecting some shiny items and hiding them under my big doctor robe
>just wandering and picking up golden shit
>nobody dares questioning scary mask medieval doctor
>calculate that I just need a few days of looting to finance 5/7 castle
Cont?

yes, youre so fucking right lol

don't ask cont, just keep going

Yes doctor!

Alrighty, so when this thread becomes archived we need to find a way to make Mr. Volgun aware of this masterpiece.

I'm just gonna email him the archived thread and hope for the best, Or that guy that does copypasta readings... What was his name.. A Guy With A Voice??

>Wednesday
>I go to king's room
>he says he's feeling much better and doesn't want lots of healing today
>Ohfuck.parchmin
>"I shall bring his Majesty white wine to ease his pain during recovery"
>rush out
>go back to room and open special medicine case
>pull out live plague rat
>sometimes a man needs to sacrifice his favorite snack for the greater good of medieval bitcoin
>drop plague rat into barrel of white wine
>have barrel brought to king and instruct he be served lots of wine
>go back to my looting routine for rest of the day
C-c-c-c-cont!

From what I gathered he goes by "That Guy With A Voice".

Don't fucking ask, just continue.
This is so good

Yeah him, i'll email him the thread as well.

let me get some pleasure from my hard work, user

Love these medieval doctor threads!

>>homosexualityissin.bible

I hate that this made me laugh

>thursday
>visit the king in his room
>his face is back to that sweet green complexion typical of great medicining
>king says he should have listened to knowledgeable doctor and needs more medicine after all
>"a most judicious choice, sire"
>go on medecining
>Went a bit overboard poking peasant child yesterday and am now stuck with incriminating evidence
>decide to disguise it for more medicine material
>pulls out the peasant child skull from big doctor robe
>"the king shall drink from this skull for more efficient healing "
>bullshit servant assistant says it looks like quite a small skull
>"that's because it is Peruvian"
>dodgedasword.medievaltrumpet
>king asks if he's going to keep suffering
>"oh, not for much longer your highness"
>finally king passes out
>time for the gold rush
C-u-n-t

yes, robo-doc

Go on, sir

>nothing a good stick can't fix anyway
I kekd.

>Friday
>start my day with a bit of shiny items collecting
>bullshit servant assistant enters the room as I slide huge golden chandelier in my robe
>thinkfast.codex
>"the king generously offered this item as a reward for his healing"
>as soon as faggot assistant leaves I rush to king's room
>just in time
>there's a knock at the door
>it's the fucking servant assistant
>this faggot straight out asks the king if he gave me the authorization to take the gold chandelier
>ohfuck.guillotine
>panic mode
>that old pig of a king must not talk
>start shoving goat shit into his mouth
>servant seems shocked but I explain that I, very knowledgeable doctor, am using secret oriental technique
>bezoarstone.specialmedicine
>at noon, king dies
>explain he contracted incurable disease from prostitutes' cunts
>before leaving I meet with the royal council
>warn the council that a young servant seems corrupted with the same illness as his majesty
>recommend they get rid from faggot servant assistant before he spreads the disease
>am praised for my wisdom as I leave
>few weeks later
>in my new magnificent castle
>listening to my spy report while distractedly poking some peasant children with new golden pointy stick
>spy says the two prostitutes got burnt at the stake along with servant-that-knew-too-much
>I am very smart doctor

Bravo my dear! *clapclapclap*

stop ssying cunt and just cunt you cunt

10/10 so far sire

it's over my good sire

Great tale my liege

THIS IS THE GOOD SHIT. THIS IS WHY I KEEP COMING HERE.

>here, have this tendies.

Attached: 17sbe5j5JlbWYzwr8-SW1QZUbniSgBWb29HcV8bef2I.png (380x253, 125K)

Here is the full corrected version

>be me
>renowned medieval doctor
>be in my castle testing theory that acid cures stomach cramps
>instead makes peasant scream for 45 minutes and die
>weird.manuscript
>young page suddenly arrive and disturbs me in my very important experiment
>pissed off, grab pointy stick with intent to teach that villain some life lessons
>Page tells me he's sent by the king who is sick and requires my expertise
>verywell.tapestry
>select pointiest stick of all sticks to show I'm no faggot doctor
>homosexualityissin.bible
Monday
>arrive to great royal castle
>thinking I should extort more medieval bitcoin from peasants to get myself one of these
>get to the king's room
>am given a servant assistant
>he whispers to my ear that king was found shaking uncontrollably with his face up some prostitutes' cunts
>"Ah yes, that is a rare but treatable condition"
>tfw I have no idea what's wrong with that old pig
>whatever.canvas
>nothing a good stick can't fix anyway
>actively start the curing process
>imknowledgeabledoctor.clyster
>12 hours later
>king's face has turned greenish
>decide it's been enough medicining for the day
>head back to special room appointed for great renowned doctor
>have some peasant children brought in the room to poke with stick before sleep
>sweetsoundofcries.descantlute

Final 2/3
>Tuesday
>go to king's room for some early morning medicining
>nothing beats the smell of freshly drained blood at dawn
>ten ounces of blood later, I leave to have a stroll in the castle
>impressed by the great number of golden shit
>slowly a more efficient strategy to obtain sweet medieval bitcoin emerges in my mind
>start collecting random shiny items and hiding them under my big doctor robe
>just wandering around the castle looking quite suspicious
>nobody dares questioning scary mask medieval doctor
>calculate I just need a few days of looting to finance great castle with many medicine rooms and pointy sticks
>Wednesday
>go to king's room
>he says he's feeling much better and doesn't want lots of healing today
>Ohfuck.parchmin
>"I shall bring his Majesty white wine to ease his pain during recovery"
>rush out
>go back to my room and open special medicine case
>pull out live plague rat
>sometimes a man needs to sacrifice his favorite snack for the greater good of medieval bitcoin
>drop plague rat into barrel of white wine
>have barrel brought to king and instruct he be served lots of wine
>go back to my looting routine for rest of the day
>Thursday
>visit the king in his room
>his face is back to that sweet green complexion typical of great medicining
>king says he should have listened to revered knowledgeable doctor and needs more medicine after all
>"a most judicious choice, sire"
>go on medicining
>went a bit overboard during peasant children poking session yesterday and am now stuck with incriminating evidence
>decide to disguise it for more medicine material
>pulls out the peasant child skull from big doctor robe
>"the king shall drink from this skull for more efficient healing "
>bullshit servant assistant says it looks like quite a small skull
>"that's because it is Peruvian"
>dodgedasword.medievaltrumpet
>king asks if he's going to keep suffering
>"oh, not for much longer your Highness"
>finally king passes out
>time for the gold rush

Final 3/3
>Friday
>start my day with a bit of shiny items collecting
>bullshit servant assistant enters the room as I slide huge golden chandelier in my robe
>thinkfast.codex
>"the king generously offered this item as a reward for his healing"
>as soon as faggot assistant leaves I rush to king's room
>just in time
>there's a knock at the door
>it's the fucking servant assistant
>this faggot straight out asks the king if he gave me the authorization to take the gold chandelier
>ohfuck.guillotine
>panic mode
>that old pig of a king must not talk
>start shoving goat shit into his mouth
>servant seems shocked but I explain that I, very knowledgeable doctor, am using secret oriental technique
>bezoarstone.specialmedicine
>at noon, king dies
>explain he contracted incurable disease from prostitutes' cunts
>before leaving I meet with the royal council
>warn the council that a young servant seems corrupted with the same illness as His Late Majesty
>recommend they get rid from faggot servant assistant before he spreads the disease
>am praised for my wisdom as I leave
>few weeks later
>in newly aquired magnificent castle
>listening to my spy's report while distractedly poking some peasant children with new golden pointy stick
>spy says the two prostitutes got burnt at the stake along with servant-that-knew-too-much
>I am very smart and rich doctor

Great, i'll email now

5/7 fine sire

Medieval gas mask with slightly less asbestos

best r9k greentext in forever

great job user, would be a kino film no doubt