I will be joining a gym tomorrow

finally decided i am going to waste my money and time to join gym because
1. i will die soon if i am not getting into shape
2. I cannot fuck fat prostitute because of our fat

any advice or working out routine that will make me thinner efficiently?

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Get one of those newfangled wifi scales that sells your data to insurance companies on the low
they'll suck your dick and give you charts of your weight and body fat

or use wii fit?

Lots of cardio. Ain't no way around that. And if you actually want to lose weight, you need to fix your diet: that has a much, much bigger impact than exercise.

Losing weight is actually 90% diet and unless you're doing hours of exercise every day it's not going to make a big difference. Is exercise good? Of course it is, it's just not a big of a deal as people think when it comes to weight loss.

Im skinny eating a Popeyes tendies rn, jelly ?

The best way to lose a lot of weight is going on a plant based diet

Thanks for the advice bots, really appreciate it!

stick to it, hard. really gotta gun yourself on this.

i've been trying to stick to bodyweight pushups pullups and squats for about four weeks now, and it surprises me how much my mentality towards a lot of things has changed. good for your body, good for your head.

how much do you originally weigh?

Diet is 90%. I dont know why fatties go to the gym, if you are heavy its going to make any kind of cardio unbearably difficult, best to lose weight through diet first then start going to the gym when you are alot lighter weight that cardio isnt going to have you feeling like you never wanted to be born.

Thats the best way to get bowel cancer.

go on a diet and do cardio
dont try lifting weights or anything, that won't do you any good for losing weight

> (OP)
>Losing weight is actually 90% diet

This is correct. And the easiest / most effective diet is the keto diet. You just have to give up on carbs (sugar, bread, beer).

But you can still gorge on meat and cheese and wine as much as you want

>memeto diet
because everyone knows the best way to get rid of fat is to replace your entire diet with fat

>But you can still gorge on meat and cheese and wine as much as you want

How? Stuff like fatty meats, cheese and wine are very high in calories so surely you wouldn't lose weight if you ate a lot of it?

lies
go read Jow Forums's sticky op

diet is way more important than exercise. and sleep is more important too.

My biggest advice would be to cut out bread (high in calories, and you can always just put all the ingridients in your mouth frank reynolds style) as well as all beverages other than water.

as for workouts, the stairmaster will be good. it's cardio and it works out the biggest muscles in your body--glutes, quads, hammies and calves--so that'll burn calories trying to recover

You are right, but there are three things which make this diet work :

1) fat makes you more satiated than anything else, so you feel less hunger and eat less

2) Your body starts using fat instead of carbs as its primary fuel source. Including the stored up fat.

3) this diet makes you thirsty and you end up drinking fucktons of water. The fact that you are so well hydrated allows your body release the stored up water. This lets fatties lose 10 kilos super easily while eating at a calorific surplus.

Correct. That's how you teach your body to burn it.

Have you tried it?

>keto diet
it's really expensive though

is it worth jogging if your obese? worried about damaging my joints.

stick to walking and bodyweight exercises+cardio until you get from obese to overweight
running damaged one of my shins on several occasions, rendering me unable to walk properly and doing exercises that include using the legs for 1-2 weeks
also check out athlean-x, there are a lot of bodyweight exercises (i stress that because it's free, no tools, you only need a wall or chair to do them)
but note that cardio burns everything, fat AND muscles

i personally stick to the most basic ones though:
>squats
>situps
>on-knee pushups (until there's less weight)
don't push yourself or you'll get hurt
test how many reps you can do, then add it to your routine
if you're not exhausted afterwards, you're too easy on the workout

and as others stated already, change your diet, i recommend keto diet

You shouldn't do cardio on a calorie deficit. Intermittent fasting helps regulate appetite.

gorging on meat and cheese is a shitty idea, they're very calorie dense. dark leafy greens and low carb vegetables should be the bulk of what you eat on keto. your 20-50 net carbs a day should be all from whole plants or nuts, seeds, or berries. these things have fiber, micronutrients, and phytonutrients that are really important to your health.

you eat meat and cheese on top of that.

keto is amazing for weight loss and restoring insulin sensitivity but you still need to eat plants for optimal health.

I have I'm just trying to eat under 1500 cals a day

have you tried going to a doctor before doing this?

>fasting
How do people do this? I mean when I start to get hungry it turns into pain and nausea pretty quick

from my own experience in losing weight,
as far as dieting is concerned my advice is,
be reasonable with it and know your limitations.
Sure there are certainly things you absolutely need to cut out, like refined sugars since they are high calorie and dont fill you up,
but you shouldn't go overboard with calorie reduction or get on meme diets, because despite what a lot of people want to think your will power does have limitations , there is a point where you will break.
You need to strive for a tolerable level of hunger , one that you feel confident you can do for months. I mean you seriously need to ask yourself that question, "Can I keep this up for months or even years?". If you are absolutely suffering you're probably not going to be able to keep that up for very long
you'll break
binge like crazy
and regain all the weight.

Now if you are dangerously obese you need to go see a doctor , he would most likely prescribe you something like Phentermine for a couple of months to try to get you out of the danger zone as quickly as possible. But yeah rapid weight loss at that level isn't something you want to do without the supervision of a doctor.

and I guess another thing that may or may not apply to you is look into if there is an underlying reason why you have been overeating.
For me it was because I had no friends , lover, or hobbies, eating and jerking off were the only things that gave me any enjoyment in my life at that point.

For the last few days I have been on 1 hour eating window and 23h fast, and I have to say that results are quite impressive. Feeling good. My digestive tract works perfectly. Not getting too hungry throughout the day, so can easly stick to it. Burnt shit ton of fat and can still perform well at the gym.
What is so hard about not eating for such a short time? I dont get it, especially that you can eat daily, just not for a whole day? Gotta be one of those 'merifats I pressume?

Spend your money on English lessons instead.

Going to the gym again, Champ? You don't need any of that stuff. When I was your age, I whipped myself into shape by helping out at your great-grandparents farm, working the fields and lifting bales of hay. The ladies were practically all over me when school started. I don't need much to stay in shape these days, though. I mostly stay fit just by walking up and down the stairs at work.

Whaddya mean there's a difference between cardio and strength and bulking and cutting? All you need to do is get off your lazy behind, stay active, eat healthy (No more tendies, Champ), and drink two spoons of acai juice. It works, Champ. I read it on the Internet. You can start by helping me rearrange the furniture and doing some yard work. Then we'll drive around town to get you a job. You'll have no problem shedding pounds once you start working for a living, Champ.

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no I is yuropoor
That being said I explained why not eating for extended amounts of time is difficult for me, hunger turns into pain and nausea (to the point where I'll eventually have to vomit) pretty quick