What were you like at your edgiest?

When I went to Jow Forums and got indoctrinated by trigger words and pepe the frog.

fuck me, I also did all of that

When i sat on 24/7 tdm_hightower servers playing sniper with pic related hat, listening to linkin park and other numetal shit.

I looked liked pic related.
I would still look like that if it were still fashionable to be honest.

Attached: pic_1495133435_1.jpg (400x400, 16K)

>unironic occultist
>anarcho-communist (I had no idea what this ideologue actually was, just thought anarchy was cool because Rage Against the Machine)
>literal in this moment I am euphoric thinking/smarter than everyone else
>listens to shitty corporate metalcore because I think its hxcx

Teenage years of course user. Specifically the first year of high school. Sum41, Story of the Year, Three Days Grace. That was the order of the day. Linkin Park AMVs, yes.
Sasuke was the best.

Naturally black straight hair down to below my collar bones. Torn to shit jeans, and black hoodie were staples of the wardrobe. I developed an eating disorder and carried my sketchbook with me constantly under my arm and drew the most trash cliches for my Deviantart account.

I can't count the amount of wall putty my parents went through.

Now I keep the wangst inside and manage to be rather normal in public aside from the essentially crippling social anxiety.

>metal
>hair dyed black
>black nails
>starting arguments about God with the nun who taught religion at school
>reading smut/erotic comics openly hoping people would notice
My embarrassment is off the charts.

Oh, you know, the usual, feeling superior above anybody else, trying to distance from people, while I still had the chance, because I thought I was literally too good in every aspect I knew for them. Long ass hair, black clothes, leather jacket, listened to fucking nightcore.
The things I kept from that were in particular, the long hair, the preference of black clothes (especially hoodies, considering they're comfy as fuck) and me being a huge fucking weeb.
The long hair is mostly because I dont even give a shit anymore on how I look, its useless anyway. Anime is still the only thing giving me a sense of direction in life, granting me hobbies (learning moon and drawing, also learning piano) a pass-time, the "motivation" to get through the normal same as usual repeating day that is college and soon to be work, and just something, if not the only thing, that makes me just feel relaxed and "at ease" nowadays.

Nah he meant the hat in the upper left corner in ops pick.

>I don't know what the fuck happened because now I'm very sensitive and cry over the most pointless shit
Could be a legit mental anxiety and stress issue since I had a similar thing up until I was about 16-17 until I saw a doctor about it.

I would cry about literally the most pointless shit.
When I was a kid I learnt that Australia wasn't the largest country in the world. I knew that the right response would be something like 'huh, alright.' but for some reason I just started crying. Literally dozens and dozens of times I would just tear up and naturally this led to the bullying at school which caused it more. My conscious brain was telling me not to cry, since but I just did anyway.

Anyway when I was in my mid to late teens my doc gave me a pill for stress and anxiety, since what I had might have been a certain condition and it was. Never cried since then, except for when my dog died.

its okay user communism is the true ideology of children we were all there once.

CRAWWLINN IN MY SKINNNNNNN!

I'm currently at my edgiest at 25
showing no sign of slowing down

Late 13 through early 15.
>listened to Slipknot and Slayer at early stage
>preached about them a lot
>late stage became heavily into black metal
>didn't preach about it because I'm not a dumbass
>wore either metal shirts or black
>had long as fuck metal hair
>called girls whores to their face
>hated popular people and was openly hating them
>cut myself a few times
>had a suicide attempt
>constantly made edgy jokes
>showed everyone my edgy as fuck memes
>was atheist but joked about being satanist
>was bullied a lot
>developed depression in late stage
>did a whole lot of shit I regretted

I changed when I was late 15. Started to become a normie because I knew I was fucked. Started to listen to rap and enjoy it. Rap pretty much saved me. Cut my long ass hair off and by the time I turned 16, I was hanging out with the "popular" kids drinking beer and vaping most weekends. I still have trouble with girls and recurring depression

>atheist
>brony
>said Jow Forums memes in real life
>/b/ user
I was 13 but everyone was a fucking cunt at 13

Even though I think anarchism is a dumb ideology, Rage is still pretty fucking cool

>tfw becoming more edgy although I'm in my mid 20s
>actually started to enyoy amvs, montages and nightcore again

Oh yeah forgot to mention that I went back to being Christian but I still get pretty awkward though

>>actually started to enyoy amvs, montages and nightcore again
Oh no

we were all cunts at 13

at least we found the guy who posted the "too be far, you have to have a very high iq to understand rick and morty" post.
>topkek

>nightcore
i hope it's classic techno/trance nigthcore and not that lame pop or rock nightcore, or im going to lose my cool...

Attached: 1523623173408.png (836x964, 511K)

I was hardcore into classic/radio/pop rock, had shoulder length hair back then and always wore merch from bands like Led Zeppelin, Pink Floyd, Guns N' Roses and the similar, not a day passed that I didn't use to autistically exhibit my tastes and looks and fight over them, it was around that time that I also started watching anime and developed an obsession over Naruto
Afterwards I had a metalcore/emo phase, then one with Pantera, periods with prog and grunge/stoner rock
And when my hair finally grew out it was black metal, which hasn't changed since
I still wear my old battle jacket on lonely winter hikes, it induces the same youthful feelings from the time when black metal destroyed my life

>again i am "extremely edgy"
Please continue to provide to us how "intellectually superior and edgy" you are to us user

conventional speling
>kek

>Militant atheist
>Zeitgeist movie series believer and evangelical
That should honestly be enough to accurately describe my level of retardation and edginess

Im running through this phase again but lots of Industrial, gore vids, life hating in general. Disbelief in God or a point in life, hating my Mom for giving my younger siblings FAS. Thinking everyone has it out for me.

Militant atheist
>i'm guessing you enjoyed starting arguments with christians over the internet user?

Dyed hair, my chemical romance and fall out boy, overabundance if wrist bands, cut myself
Yea i was normal but normal is fucking atrocious

I remember back in 2009 I would go on this TF2 server from time to time. One day I had posted a tubgirl spray near spawn and like a few minutes after the admin joined the server and started laughing his ass off at it. It was then that I knew I had to join the Steam group and their forum.

I used to trick people into looking at shock images(never gore because I thought it was illegal) often, I was a pretty low-grade prankster. Listened to a shit load of Three Days Grace/SOAD/other 00s trash and wore black all the time too.

Black metal almost destroyed my life. Thankfully I lost interest in it and saved myself from becoming a true robot

Not THAT bad but still I don't even want to think about it.
>16
>atheist/agnostic
>long hair
>played some videogames
>watched some anime
>misogynist
>socialist
>into ocultism
>System of a Down
>liked fatalistic art because it was "true to life"
By 18 I had already left all that behind though.

Man do I miss 8th grade
And I thought that I had problems back then
Only if I could have enjoyed life, I never thought I'd get to the point where depression would turn into a privilege

Very satisfying thread also, thank you OP

Attached: 53f.jpg (196x250, 7K)

Hold onto your pants.

>19 years old
>convinced I had no capability of feeling any emotion
>utilitarian
>did not decorate my room, consume any media, listen to any music or pursue any traditional hobbies
>drank hard liquor daily
>dressed solely in muted colors, turtlenecks, dress shoes, fitted jackets
>carried a weapon on me at all times
>violent necrophile
>severe insomniac
>involuntarily institutionalized
>kicked out of the marine corps for being too much of a threat to a bunch of grown ass men trained to kill
>while out of the marines, get assigned by court to attend therapy in a clinic for sex offenders
>chemically castrated

...it started getting better from there.

Attached: 1460836819907.jpg (540x264, 31K)

what does this mspaint comic have to do with what that other user said, retard?

I don't know man I'm somehow happy about my decision, music played a significant role in my life in a greater manner than socialization, I work as a producer today and think I wouldn't want it any different if I had the choice, even if I lived through it again I'd do the same, the only thing I regret is that I didn't appreciate it as much

>...it started getting better from there.

Do continue

fuck u ok pal?

Good evening necro-chan

Attached: F04E644C16B144558AAFB661E53C0FEB.jpg (514x442, 49K)

>7 years later
>diagnosed properly
>turns out I had severe, untreated OCD, bipolar type 1 and necrophilia
>got on correct medication
>the manic episodes stopped, and with it, the violence
>with proper therapy, the obsessive thoughts about death dramatically lessened, and I was able to get good employment and a nice home
>still drink heavily and sleep for shit, but life is a lot better
>even going back to school soon

Yep pal, everything is gonna be ok

Good evening austria-chan

i'm getting edgier and edgier every day
because...
i'm just...
too broken... to be saved...
fuck this shitty world..........................................

Can you give a detailed description to what takes place in the head of a necrophiliac?
Was it a literal sexual attraction or more like a general obsession with death you tried to comply with? Had your OCD to do with it or was it independent of it?
What were your sexual targets like? Putrefied or rather fresh?
Add anything interesting

Literal, figurative, sexual, intellectual, emotional

From a young age I associated death with comfort and stability thanks to my insane and irrational family's behavior at funerals
Thanks to night terrors about homicide and necrophilia, also from a young age, and intrusive thoughts, the OCD had a very large part to do with the lingering obsession.
Before I ever had a sexuality, I was in love with the dead and how they affected others. It was only natural for me to want to be with them. I couldn't tell, and still can't tell, if the obsession with death is purely a product of the OCD that I've fed into, or if it's something organic that OCD latched onto. It's so intricately tied into every aspect of my thoughts and emotions that I can't tell where it stops and ends.

The dead are the only thing I've ever been attracted to. Ironically, the living have always been like inanimate objects to me. I don't feel any sort of lust towards traditionally attractive men or women. Other fetishes do not compute. I did deeply enjoy a lot of sadism when I was younger, but I couldn't climax from it- and as I've gotten older, things have gone from an attraction to freshly dead, to stale, to rotten. They need to be bloated, soft, marbled, lips and eye protruding, utterly and unmistakably dead in order for me to be aroused.

I've recently been discussing this with my psychologist, as obviously, now that I've gotten a lot of my life in order, I want to see if there's any healthy possibility of working on my sexuality. He's consulted with some specialists, asked me a LOT of questions in our last session, and I hope in the near future I can speak with someone who might be able to help. I still have hope.

I'm 27 and i'm currently at my edgiest.

God doesn't exist and having children is immoral. There is no meaning and everyone you've known will cease to exist forever.

During puberty I had an obsession with edgy things just like every mean 12-year-old, except that mine was aimed at scenes of horror because it compensated for my lack of activity with this adrenaline rush caused by fear, I was a very fearful kid and gentle person and looking at things that weren't appropriate for my sensitive age always gave me a nice rush, that's how I found out about Anatoly Moskvin, a few times I was really turned on by the masked little girls he kept inside his house, I masturbated to them two or three times and deeply regretted it afterwards but that was basically it, keep in mind that I was only 13 years old at the time
Up to this day my relationship with the dead switches between intense fear and indifference, either necrophobia or curiosity, there would be days when I could visit a cemetery and read names and dates from gravestones just out of interest, and others when I couldn't approach places where the dead reside within a distance of several meters
I already got through my schizo phase and lead a completely normal life now, the thing is that they diagnosed it as youth crisis back when I was 16 but they never found out about this
I am now 19 and still have some eccentric sexual preferences and the such, fortunately not focused in this direction, I just wanted to hear your opinion on this

I'm very happy to hear things worked out in a different way for you and that things are going better. It's always nice to talk about anonymously, since it's rare to really get an opportunity to vent. Thanks m8.

I dress in black a lot, that's about it.

>what were you like at your edgiest?
still edgy actually

Attached: fucking norms.png (781x726, 515K)

I dabbed while listening to mine shaft of broken picks wearing a vape shop snap back with a hood over it and gaming headphones on over all of it, while doing a card fan with one of my dabbing hands.

~Trenchcoat Masturbation Mafia daily life

Good luck user, I hope you will recover just as good, though let's be honest you're far beyond me, but there's always hope, I've lived to see it on my own
I don't take medication anymore and even had a gf already

>roblox sci-fi clan rper
>mumford and sons fan
>wore all black and skinny jeans irl
>unironically spoke in really broken german as a part of my rp
>considered myself "a greater intelligence" and capable of leading men

I even have a wiki page of my rp if anyone's interested. Luckily I didn't write it.

I started wearing a trenchcoat to school every day not too long after Columbine. At the time, I had no friends and would sit by myself and read during class and lunch. No one ever said anything to me about it but I'm sure the faculty were watching me very closely.

Watching ISIS execution videos in the middle of class

totally random order but just a few of many things that come to mind
>14 playing osu with girls who faked high pitched anime voices over skype
>unironically listened to nightcore and would send links randomly in the middle of conversations and continue typing like it never happened
>kept getting added by older guys on steam in their 20's to 40's who would try and erp with me
>for some reason felt bad removing pedo creeps so was stuck at friend cap of over 400 people constantly
>got like 50 games gifted that I mostly didn't even play
>told everyone I was a lesbian because every beta would whiteknight and defend me if evil penises approached me
>watched oreimo and starting trying to convince guys how incest is pure love despite having no siblings or ever experiancing any kind of pure love
>4k mmr dota player
>skateboarding
>hollywood undead
>had a pitbull named curry
>angel beats
>tried heroin once
>taking painkillers and cold meds until I'd get withdrawels
>deepthroated twizzlers over the mic
>would always carry a lighter with me and would set random things on fire when no one was watching
>smoked free weed with guys all the time every summer, barely even considered any of them friends
>would wear my headphones over a hoodie while I played because it was the only way I felt comfortable
>convinced a guy to let me give him a footjob and told him to lick the cum off of my feet after, he must have underestimated how retarded I actually was or something
>caught a smol alligator
uwaaaaaaaaa, I think I want to die remembering, anons

Attached: 5.gif (500x281, 81K)

I painted my nails black like a fag because I thought it looked cool. Still do it from time to time.

I am always at my edgiest. Listen to black metal and dress all in black and I hate everybody.

trying to picture a 14 year old girl skateboarding with a hoodie up listening to hollywood undead setting things on fire catching alligators and doing heroin but i cant

Attached: 1521319340211.png (650x650, 13K)

Commented a laughing emoji on a girl's photo of her and her father's grave

>tfw I'm actually starting to become edgy again
>although a different kind of edgy, like a hipster edgy
wewlads

This was 6 years ago. Quoted Richard Dawkins, The Amazing Atheist, Christopher Hitchens, Sam Harris and George Carlin (his religion stuff). We all go through these edgy anti-theist phases. Some don't grow out of it, though. I was also interested in Satanism. I would get into religious debates online with random people. Was a hardcore nihilist.

This was also in my edgy communist phase as well. I wanted all guns banned. Believed in infinite genders. Traps were not gay. Hated capitalism for no reason. Wanted to ban religion and make it illegal. Muh higher intellect. Unironically watched the daily show, Bill Maher, Jim Jefferies talk about banning guns.

I'm in my 20's now and I'm a born-again Christian. Thank God I'm no longer an edgy fedora-tipping atheist.

Attached: 1523738956373.jpg (236x188, 13K)

Post wiki page pls

Wow what a convenient time to check the thread. I was about to clock out for the night.

It's short but at least someone liked me enough to make it. vaktovianempire.wikia com/wiki/Basalisk

Rage is pretty sweet. They were only half right though, anarcho-capitalist is the way to go

None of those, really. I was always just a bland, introverted thing without anything remarkable memorable about him.

Literally attempted suicide for 'character' and to fit my vibe, got depressed after that. Now I'm just depressed withput the inherent need to kill myself

Maybe right now actually
>18
>have been into metalcore and mathcore shit for a couple years now
>recently got into emo (bright eyes)
>always was a guy to wear black sweaters and sweatpants or ripped jeans
>but people who buy pre-ripped jeans are pansies
>get drunk at least once a week
>like anime but rarely watch it
>unironically am attracted to goth girls
>have no motivation to pursue the things I want to do
>a girl recently showed a picture she found of me smiling and said that she had never seen me smile before

Luckily I have no major mental issues and I don't want to die.

Attached: qtpi.png (714x480, 609K)

I'm 23 and I'm going back to my edgy phase after 6 years. Just kill me

i was the typical myspace scene kid. I'm talking dyed hair piercings the works. I was like 120 pounds too fuck.

Maybe was 6th grade, I had long hair, band tees and wore fingerless gloves sometimes. I had an assignment for english were we'd play a song for our class and interpret the meaning afterwards. I chose this.

youtube.com/watch?v=XSftGmSq3-g

I think the edgiest shit would be my friend and I linking people shocksites on aim. You could put in fake URL's for some reason. We also made his brother a gay dating site account and would fuck with people in chatrooms.
Good times.

What kind of edgy?
The normalfag definition "anyone with a non rose tinted opinion" or the one where people go out of their way to say depressing things?

One peaked in my 20s and never went back down and the other was a blip in highschool for a few years.

Brace yourself.
>was like 13-14 when skrillex style dubstep was hugely popular in 2011
>was fucking obsessed and would tell people how great the sounds are
>fucking loved skrillex, and said he was the best to other people even though I thought other artists were better, just cause he had the crazy hair and piercings and shit
>Had the typical straightened emo hair, but didn't colour it black thank fuck
>never dressed emo or anything even though I sort of wanted to
>made custom wallpapers for my school laptop
>was always some heavy as fuck dubstep album with obscure artist logos photoshopped around it
>had like 10 different ones that changed every 2 minutes ranging from early Monstercat and Going Quantum to SkiSm, Excision, Zomboy and Never say Die
>No Skrillex thankfully because he was too mainstream, plus I wanted to show off my superior taste with obscure shit nobody knew about
>had secret santa one time, and I accidentally found out who it was so we decided to buy our own gifts and then swap them
>Other people got each other stationery or accessories and stuff like that
>Bought myself a $35 ministry of sound dubstep album to show off my high intellect
>everyone kept wanting to see the songs on it so a couple days later I showed some of my friends
earrape.wav
>They never asked again

Note that I had really shit internet with terrible data caps at this point in time
>Had zero interaction with people when I came home from school because of the internet
>probably a good thing because I'd probably post some 2dark2edgy shit publicly
>instead played single player beta 1.3 minecraft from 3:30pm to 10:30pm every single day
>Listened to heavy as fuck dubstep (like 5 songs on repeat) while playing.

>mfw every now and again I remember some cringy shit I did that I initially forgot about

I have more stories but those are for another time.
I listen to metalcore now and wear black clothing so I suppose I'm still kind of edgy but at least now I'm self aware.

Attached: IMG_8967.png (394x437, 14K)

I had long hair down to my back, listened to metal, wore all black, was a militant atheist and would verbally rape anyone who tried to pontificate to me about Christianity (my legal guardian forced me to read the Bible when I was a kid so I had encyclopedic knowledge of it). I also thought sephiroth was super cool.

Code orange? Converge?

Dressed only in white, bandana around my head. Trying to look like a nigger-ganster. Im still ashamed of that, 15years later. Thank god i didnt meet anyone i knew. Only did it as a social experiment for a few days, and it didnt work out.

>watched oreimo and starting trying to convince guys how incest is pure love despite having no siblings or ever experiancing any kind of pure love
kek

Attached: 1474884844407.jpg (251x260, 5K)

I'm fairly new to the genre actually. I've heard of those bands but I haven't really listened to them.
I started out with BFMV from Need for speed Most Wanted, then I found other stuff.
I listen to Parkway Drive (Deep Blue, Killing with a smile), blessthefall (awakening, witness), Breakdown of Sanity (Mirrors, Perception) and Austrian Death Machine.
I would highly recommend Breakdown of Sanity. They're brutal as fuck without being too overpowering.

Attached: toga's descent into madness.jpg (380x720, 134K)

Tortured a goldfish and threw a kitten a couple of meters. Fought with people a lot and feeling superior cause muh intelligence. Whole lot of good that did, god i was cringy back then, the poor animals too, why would i do that? There's no personal gain to be had in hurting animals.

I went around on Runescape back in 2006 in full black armour typing "..." in red. I thought it made me mysterious.

Attached: 1500175597875.jpg (250x247, 5K)

i used to tell people i was a drug dealer and a hitman and all sorts of chuuni shit. those were silly times

Never had an edgy phase, don't know why but I just never felt the need to express my edginess.

Oh dude nine inch nails is the perfect band for an edgy 15-18 year old. Some of his music still holds up though.

Yep, you're a retarded nutjob right now who thinks he hit the jackpot and his religion is the one and only true religion while the others are all fake, lmao. Just the exact thing everyone else is thinking about yours.
You can hate commies, degenerates and be pro gun ownership without believing in supernatural gibberish.

Probably right now.
>Only wear black shirts
>Started smoking
>Never smile
>Act as if I don't give a shit about anything
>Thinking about cutting myself

Attached: large.png (500x699, 153K)

>my edgy fedora atheism from when i was 13 will never escape me

I'm unironically into most early 2000's edgy shit despite being memed to death, it's very hard to upgrade or remove. I might be a brainlet.

I had this edgy atheist nihilist whatevs phase at some point in my early twenties, but I don't think it comes even close to that I used to hand out Chick tracts on a street corner on weekends to drunk people and ruin biology classes by soapboxing creationism in high school. It's really creepy how I've come the entire same circle as my father did in his youth in the seventies. Brouhgt up a revivalist Christian, served in the military, went to infantry ROTC, then took a 180 degree turn during the military and started hanging out with the hippie crowd reading esoteric philosophies and radical leftist writings after I got civilian again. Experienced some really heavy mental issues including multiple psychotic episodes and then kinda came in healthy terms with my roots and mended the ties with my faith. I'd maybe consider myself a light conservative nowadays.

This so much

originonlyconly of course

Attached: 1516259570709.jpg (255x247, 39K)

Probably my extreme metal phase in my mind teens, though I never dressed like a dirty metal head

Fortunatly I wasn't the worse Chuunibyou, as I was too shy to actually do anything. But god fucking damn it was I a retard.

>Middle school.

>As being edgy was mainstream I found my vocation in the complete opposite, adopting a "better than you" way of life.
>Going my take on the "supreme gentleman" meme
>Get good grades, feel smarter, enjoy the feel derived by the knowing that everyone but me was "uncultured swine"
>Listen to jazz (I still like it, but...), Read "complicated" books, tell people they were dummies if they smoked/drank/did anything unresponsable.
>I'm actually a stupid dumb retard, but it doesn't matter.

>High school

>This is where the mirror broke. I Was average at best.
>Need to be special snowflake intensifies
>It's the "Muh sick" tumblr like phase.
>As I'm too dumb to be special with my actions, I'll be special for other reasons.
>Lied about being colorblind/insert mental sickness on the internet (too shy to do it irl)
>Still sometime do it still because problems didn't go away.

Attached: fuck.png (326x329, 62K)

Me now as I browse Jow Forums