>senior in hs
>finals week
>as i'm going to class this fatty comes up to me
>talks to me like i'm her best friend or something
>starts asking how I did in yesterday's exam
>just node to her and don't say anything
>she's clearly embaressed
>later that day, in the middle of another exam
>she spergs out, starts crying and throwing things at me
so this is how it feels to be CHAD huh
>woman asks the time
>tell her I don't know
>I did know but wasn't going to give it away for free to some slut
feels good bro
>be me
>be on track team
>be at meet
>out in field with two girls and other guy
>girls and guy start asking me what kind of girl i like because i am single
>secretly have crushes on both girls
>gottaplaythissmooth.jpg
>tell them that i do not know
>they tell me to point to someone who looks attractive
>igotthis.gif
>begin eeny meeny miny, mo while only point at the two grils
>everyone starts laughing and telling me how smooth i am
still single to this day
being a chad was in my grasp and i let it slip
I read this with Eds voice lel
that makes it funnier
>qt girl in front of me looks nervous and fidgety
>ask her what's wrong
>"i didnt do the homework last night, im so screwed. can i please copy off you before the teacher checks it?"
>ask her what i can get in return
>she offers to buy me lunch
>tell her i already ate
>she says "then what do you want?"
>think about it for a second
>tell her i wanna grab her titty
>she tells me to fuck off weirdo
>teacher overhears
>tells her to go to the office for using inappropriate language
>mfw i didnt even do the homework myself
That's the closest i ever came to being chad
>>everyone starts laughing and telling me how smooth i am
spoiler: they were laughing at you not with you, retard
thats actually fucking awsome user
>everyone starts laughing and telling me how smooth i am
They were being sarcastic, user.
>be...me
>autist trying to get out of shell
>go to karaoke bar with coworkers, sing some easy karaoke songs
>female coworkers compliment my singing (not really that good)
>start talking to one, eventually go up to dance with her
>kinda drunk and she is looking hot
>really hot
>start to get hard
>"well, this is why we wear jeans, to hide our boners"
>A few minutes into dancing she is staring down
>first thought, "I'm just randomly shuffling back and forth, is she trying to follow my step or something?"
>look down, what I thought was a well hidden chub was actually a prominent outline of my raging boner
>could almost see the veins with the outline on my pants
>I mean, like from the base to the tip. Idk what it was about this jean-undies combo that made a chub so outlined, but goddamned
>turn 360, and walk away
>left the bar
>embarrassed af, is she gonna tell my other coworkers? Will she tell the boss? Did she get offended? Will I get sued for sexual harassment?
>liferuined.jpg
>next day at work, she is super flirty with me and happy to see me
>she used to never make contact with me, now she grabs my hand and says hi while brushing her hair
Basically rubbed my boner on a chick while dancing and that made her like me. To this day I am still shocked this turned out so well.
One time during PE, a girl threw a dodge ball at my head and started crying and tried to hug me.
Being the Chad that I am, I declined her hug, and I might've embarrassed her because everyone gasped for some reason.
I wish I wasn't a dicklet.
how big is it, your cock that is?
Not that big, 6.5 inches
Right, from now on you'll need to play along with it and keep her happy to avoid sexual harassment charges. If she thinks you're the one to reject her then she'll flip and seek revenge, modern women are like that and don't know how to walk away from things without getting back at the person.
How thick tho original comment
69 dubs, (You)
well timed, bonerboi
>Be me
>Be senior in pre-calc class
>Bitch boi Josh Romanowski comes up to me
>"Hey user, how does it feel to be a senior in a class full of freshmen and sophomores? :^)
>"Hey Josh, how does it feel to go fuck yourself, faggot?"
>be me, sophomore in hs
>at university of houston downtown campus, had to take test in order to be eligible for dual credit class
after test, was easy as shit
>having lunch in cafeteria
>fatty I knew from my history class sits across from me
>have no interest in her, so act natural
>she's mirin, makes conversation
>I give her menial answers, but participate enough and eat with her out of courtesy
>the man slut + virgin in me wants to smash porky girl
>resist, she's 2/10 only for being a natural blonde with blue eyes
Senior year now, she's going to college at a culinary institute
I want more pussy but at the same time it stank
Have not measured, but thicker than average bear.
When I first met her she seemed petty and really closed up. She was a really short girl with a resting bitch face. I thought to myself, "this chick doesn't like guys hitting on her at all unless they are Chad. She would probably tell the boss about me flirting at work immediately." But then to find out that not only is that all not true, but she is actually thirsty af for dick. This is a time to celebrate not be paranoid
>was on the rugby team
was on the rugby team, it was varsity and division 2 college sport but best part:
>women's team was twice as large
> lots of "activities" we did together that lead to afterparties at night
>got some of action
this was all b4 i quit the team
Well what are you waiting for, have you done the deed yet?
I took precalc my senior year, got through calc 1-3 in 2 semesters getting A's, taking diff EQ in the fall, don't let what any fag says get to you.
>Get a highschool gf, my first gf
>Not much more of a relationship than holding hands and snuggles
>I want things to get physical but gf doesn't and wants to take it slow
>I don't push her but am a little peeved
>Kind of blab about this with her mom who straight up fucking offers sex if her daughter won't
>End up with a nice sweet and innocent teen love relationship with gf, while getting to fuck her mom the rest of the time
Chaddest moment, eventually my gf came around to wanting things physical as well so for a time I got to fuck both her and her mom.
>Be me last Saturday
>Have one friend who is girl
>She invited her two girlfriends to throw football around in the park
>Hear one of the girls whisper
>"You're friend is cute as fuck"
>"user? He's such a..."
>Later get hit in the face by football
>Sperg out and tackle one of the girls
>Oh my god what have I done??
>Girl starts laughing
>All the girls start jumping on me
>"Let's tackle user!"
>Got piled on by 3 chicks
>Got kinda hard
>Girls laughter dies
>They all got off
>Left alone in the field while they were talking
>"Hey our friend just texted and she like really needs us right now"
>"Oh okay see you next time. It was nice meeting all of you..."
>I was Chad for a good 10 minutes at least
Would be cool and good if real
Then it's cool and good.
What should we do in this situation? Invite ourselves along or invite them to our bedrooms?
Thanks user.
You're right. But it's hard to not be petty.