RIP CHRIS CHAN

what are chapters 8-12?
the universe ceases to end

i bet she used to be p. cute when she was young huh

Hes basically an animal. He has no foresight.

Ch 9 involves the dark arts of CPA
Ch 10 gives instructions on how to summon a femdom succubus accountant who will manage your money and your balls.
Ch 11 we dont talk about
Ch 12 is the lost art gold alchemy

t. Accountant

Do Chris' shirts share a symbiotic relationship with him? Do they grow as he grows? Literally the stuff he used to wear as a kid he wore as an adult.
Was the beginning of the end when he sold "The Classic"? Was his "I am not a homo" mentality bound to this mysterious artefact? Not to mention he rewrote his own fucking canon by making Rosechu M2F trans
Find out next time in Sonichu #14

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That look in Barb's eyes... she has seen far too much. More than any mortal could handle, a life with CWC has claimed her sanity.

thanks! sounds like you went to hogwarts for your CPA

Wew lad, most originalel

You must be retarded if you think this.

You wake up tomorrow as Bob. It's 1986, and your youngest son Christopher is 4 years old.
What do you do to prevent his cruel fate and make him grow up to be a relatively normal and functioning person?

youtube.com/watch?v=9Aiv66DEGjE

is anyone else keeping up with this? i'm really enjoying it

Start her on HRT earlier in life. It'd basically fix everything.

This arc is shaping up to be the best one yet, the series finale is close

Homeless tranny hooker arc next?

How do you guys think Chris will die?

Strangled by a cokehead businessman while prostituting himself out

At a party with the inner circle in one mass suicide. The trolls will all be there, not in character but as some of chris's biggest fans It'll be bone chillingly weird and scary but everyone at the party except for Chris knows this is how it must end. I like to think for once, just for the last bit they'll let Chris be 100% himself and actually supportive. In that last party everyone will play legos with him while family guy airs in the background. The girls will all sit extremely close to him and let him be as handsy as he wants, the guys will laugh at his jokes and praise his ideas. They'll all pretend to be in a wholesome if not slightly T for Teen comedy and have a great time, hell even Megan might make and appearance.

And then after the Rockband concert from Chris at the end of the night, Liquid will come through and pass out special cups of orange fanta for everyone. and as everyone begins "falling asleep" I hope he has the most vivid images of sonichu in his mind.

Will Clyde Cash be there?

if he had got an actual gf (not some underaged boy pretending to be a girl to troll him) during his love quest how do you think his life would have turned out now? would he be in a better place?

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No, they'd have broken up and he'd have been even more autistic having had an actual relationship of any kind.

Yes he will be. Chris might not like it at first, but Clyde will have no issue losing to video games all night long and pretending to be absolutely defeated by Chris in every single way.

I watched several episodes the other day but I got bored around 7 or 8 because it was getting really repetitive just having Chris be tricked by someone again and giving them personal information/documents again over and over.

The internet would have ruined it. Even if he did get himself a girlfriend, the Inner circle with either force her to be a lolcow as well or straight up run her off.

Don't buy a computer.

Actually get Chris help for autism instead of denying it constantly like an asshat. Don't give Chris free-range to use the internet alone and make videos. Find different ways to entertain Chris outside of video games, TV, and the internet through other autistic interests like trains or birds and maybe he'll turn out to be a socially awkward but at least functioning ornithologist or train conductor.

Also this.

why is everybody and their mom making a fucking documentary about this kid

Because he's the most well documented man on the internet. Basically the closest version of "The Truman Show" we'll ever get in our lives.

>there are entire wars in recent history that don't have as much documentation as this single autist
>mfw

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All the info is already collected, you don't have to do any investigation or interviewing yourself, and it's guaranteed to make a lot of views generating revenue and fans for your future projects.

They won't be evicted someone bought the 500usd visit on ebay.
kiwifarms.net/threads/random-chris-updates.23605/page-573#post-3340664

>the party is over
>sonic boom faintly plays in the background
>corpses litter the floor, the smell of fanta drifts through the room
>animal crossing is paused on the tv
>real and custom pokemon cards litter the floor
>boyfriend free girls lie in a heap around one horrendously dressed cadaver
>chris chan sits lifelessly in a chair in the centre of the room, eyes wide and staring straight ahead
>the closet door opens
>Clyde Cash steps out
>The corpse of Megan flops out after him, tumbling to the floor
>He walks over to Chris and retrieves something from his pocket
>Striking a match, Clyde sets one of the Pokemon cards alight
>The fire begins to spread through Chris's room
>Sonichu pages are lost to the flames
>Hundreds of hours of work all fluttering around an inferno of a legacy
>Clyde goes downstairs
>The rotted corpse of Barb has sunken into a beanbag in the corner; her time of death remains unknown
>He exits via the window; the front door is blocked by clutter
>The house is engulfed in flames
>Clyde sighs
>He reaches up and grabs his hair
>With a sharp tug, the mask bearing the face of Clyde Cash comes off
>Mary Lee Walsh stands before the house of Chris Chan
>She rummages through her pockets, tossing aside her Clyde Mask and her paper medallion
>She takes an item from her pocket and leaves it on the doorstep before vanishing into the Virginia countryside
>Emergency services arrive, too late to save anything
>Among the ashes, a single pickle is found untouched on the doorstep
>Hundreds of miles away, Mary Lee Walsh sips a Long Island Ice tea in a shopping mall
>Her waiter brings her food to the table
>He hums with a faint electric glow
>"Here you are, Mrs Mayor"
>"Thank you."
>Mary reaches into her pocket and removes a piece of paper
>She admires the Deed to Mayorship of Cwcville for a moment, before folding it once more and putting it away
>She takes a sip of her drink
>The world goes on

>Mary Lee Walsh
fucking hell man. she's playing the long game

screencapped user holy fuck

Chris has so many mental disorders I can't even imagine a woman masochistic enough to be his gf.

>buy things off of ebay
>CHRISTINE'S EBAY
>C-christine's ebay
She didn't deserve this

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eagerly waiting for this saturday

The end of an era
in an original manner of course

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>walsh rigged it from the start
HOLY SHIT

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I see it

youtube.com/watch?v=9NXhPw4uWkA

>Mrs Mayor

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WEL-CUM TO CWCVILLE

the true series finale is soon.

For fuck's sake, I forgot he is incapable of talking like an adult. I think he really does have a serious intellectual disability

I'm pissed that people are gonna donate to his sorry ass. You know they will. Chris will pay his mortgage and then blow the rest on MLP toys and the cycle continues.

this is still the best video of chris chans mum.
youtube.com/watch?v=gfAvFYKVEZ4

with the music and that thousand yard stare, its almost psychedelic to watch.
if this idiot just learned to monetize his videos he would have no financial problems.

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this guy could easily make money off youtube if he actually made legit videos, he's famous

instead he's a spergy moron

>Chris will buy MLP toys and try to pay for mortgage with the leftover money, if there's any

There, user. I fixed it for you.

>not realising that the long con is to keep chris financially secure long enough to troll him into swapping genders 2 more times

Will it end with thunder?
Or will it end like sleep?
How will xe go under?
Will we sadly weep?

If it thunders we will know
One last lulz we will reap
Christines memory we will keep

If she fades, slowly way
We shall remember every day
We won't forget all xer deeds
And wait till a new one breeds

Shit this is scary.

I wonder, when Barbra was my age, did she ever see her life spiraling into what it is now?

Did barb have a stroke or something? She looks retarded or on serious medication

Chris dressed in garish clown shirts most of his life because his mother dressed him and he wore clothes multiple days in a row until they fell apart. During the old days, you could tell that The Classic was probably already years old because it was covered in holes and stains and it was slightly too small for him. It's likely he had The Classic in his possession since he was a teenager and never bothered to get new clothes as he got taller and fatter because autists hate change.

*The man who sold the world (Midge Ure's cover) plays in the distance*

>there are users ITT who weren't alive when Sonichu #1 was written

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That's kind of the point though. Chris is completely and utterly incapable of learning from his mistakes. He applies no critical thinking whatsoever whenever he's burned and he's incredibly gullible and naive, which is why people have been able to fool him over and over and over and over again, sometimes using the exact same methods as a previous attempt no matter how laughably obvious they are.

To all NEETs here, this is what happens when you're not smart with your autismbux. The smart thing to do is live a minimalist lifestyle and use the bux for bills and such, Chris and Barb spent all their money on crap they didn't need.

Where's he gonna put them if he doesn't have a home? He could shove 3 up his ass max and carry like a dozen more. 15 ponies isn't nearly enough and you're not even thinking about his other toys.

>wanting the tom girl saga to continue
It's time for the homeless saga, user.

>Where's he gonna put them if he doesn't have a home?
>Implying Chris has any sort of foresight

what
wasn't the first one written slightly before 2007?
I doubt there's that many 10 year olds here

No, that's the release date to the general public.

Sonichu has existed since at least 2004 and the average age of Jow Forums's users is 12.

He's already paid for it, some kiwi was texting him and confirmed. What I want to know now is if he's still attending BronyCon now that his buttbuddy Jack Z got doxed and won't bankroll him anymore.

He at least realizes no home = bad. He's just too lazy/ stupid to do anything about it until it's almost too late. He's got accustomed to trolls bailing him out at the last second so he doesn't take it as seriously as he should.

If he didn't have any sort of foresight at all, he would be homeless right now because they've absolutely finically fucked since Bob's death.

Fascinating, isn't it? I honestly think the CWCki has historical value now, it's possibly the most detailed account of someone's life online.

By cutting down the internet before it even began, or at least not buying a computer and actually help Christopher to reduce his autistic symptoms trough psychological support and maybe special ed.
Studies have shown that an early and responsible treatment can do wonders with high-functioning autists. I remember seeing an interview with an autistic man who just seemed like everyone else while he had a really stunted speech ability at 13.

Sure, Chris(topher) wouldn't ever be a really successful person, but with adequate treatment and limited screen time throughout his childhood, right now he would probably be a man with a job, living independently and being less naive and idiotic from actual life experience.

You know what's funny? Bob left them about 30K when he died, and Barb spent it all on a lawyer to try to get Chris unbanned from the GameStop where he tried running Michael Snyder over. She lost.

can someone link his ebay, i want to see what he's trying to sell.

>ebay.com/usr/pristinechristine1982

For fuck's sake that's absurd

LIKE, GO TO WALMART NIGGA
LIKE, BUY GAMES OFF AMAZON NIGGA
AAAAAHHHHHHHHHH

thank you user this is hilarious

>some kiwi was texting him

The flightless bird from New Zealand? What did he mean by this?

Post yfw Chris got raped by some tranny in the past few months

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Kiwifarms, it's where christorians gather to stay updated on their retarded Truman.

I think he might have been scammed. Surprising that this hasn't happened before, given how gullible he is.

Are Chris's trolls not giving him enough money to keep him alive so they can get more laughs out of him?

I have the means to pay off a large portion of their debts without harming myself financially.

Would it be in Chris's interest to make sure the absolute minimum debt payments are made so we can prolong this?

To be honest, it's very surprising we don't know what happened.

Make him blow a homeless guy or something

Most of that debt is Barb's, really the only thing paying it off would accomplish is making her confident enough to bury herself in even more Goodwill crap. Chris will just keep buying MLP shit regardless. They're too financially irresponsible.

It's a conflict of interests, some want to give him money, others don't.

Not giving him money would teach him a lesson, but it would be harder to get laughs out of Chris if he has no house or internet.

There's two "schools" of thought regarding this, some people think they're just paying to keep the lolcow alive while others feel that Chris is boring right now and the homeless saga would spice things up.

>homeless saga
That arc would last about three weeks before he wound up dead in some ditch

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Wew. This site... You've given me a new rabbit hole to jump in.

I kind of want to make a perfect looking sexbot that seduces him and makes genuine attempt to improve his life just to see what happens.

I don't know, user, Chris somehow always pulls through. Maybe God likes to watch him too.

Chris-chan is the perfect definition of "old school autism". These days it has umbrella-ed too far outward to include a "spectrum" of different bullshit(research dissenting professional opinions to the DSM-V's classification of autism if you are curious) but 15-20+ years years ago the word "autism" was only used for people with very severe cases like Chris-chan.

Originally judge for yourself.

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This shit

original post.

Dang, I can see where chris got his facial features.

The 'Chris is homeless' saga is followed by the 'Chris becomes a transexual prostitute' saga which is then ended by 'Chris is stung by a undercover cop' which ends in the 'Chris is incarcerated/Chris is institutionalised' saga.

>Trolls infiltrate the institution as personnel
>The ride never ends