Sit or stand?

What do you guys mean by "wipe?"

I stand when my shits are good which is 99 percent of the time and sit when its like PB.

>sitting
People do this? Savages

>sit wiping

Is this a joke?

I don't even sit while I shit. Why would I want my bare ass and thighs on a cold plastic ring that everyone pisses on?

Youz guys are standing? WTF?!
Are you retarded?
How do you read newspaper while standing?

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>2018
>not standing directly on the toilet seat and letting your shit fall into the bowl

>shitting in the toilet
how are your crops going to grow plentiful and bountiful if you flush away that delicious fertiliser

> that everyone pisses on?
You must have a nice home, lmao

I shower

40% of Jow Forums has dirty ass

Not having a loyal cutie wiping their ass for them and returning the favor

I stand and lift one leg to the bathtub or radiator to spread my cheeks as wide as possible and wipe with wet toilet paper then dry to ensure there's absolutely zero shit left.

I don't sit on the toilet anymore, I squat

based

Not having a septic tank, get on my level scrub

Stand wipers are dirty faggots, you can't wipe properly standing.

If you sit you can use the seat to pull your cheeks apart and really go to town on that butthole.

initial wipes are sitting on the toilet. once all the nasty stuff is out of the way, I squat down to the floor and continue wiping. feels like I can get a deeper clean

What if I do like this?

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anyone who doesn't do this is a loser

Sit, so I can spread my arse properly

I sit and wipe from the front. Am I retarded?
I also sit when I pee. I am male.

this. as if they don't have a designated licking cow stationed near their designated shitting streets

>sticking your hand into a fucking loo
Piss off, sitters. Go wipe your vaginas on reddit.

>he doesn’t bend over and get his mommy to wipe him

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Laugh at wipe-pleps

WASH-GOD

I basically have to stand. Here in Greece we don't throw the wipes inside the toilet so if I was wiping my butt while I was sitting then I would have to air-flight the paper all the way out of the toilet to the bin with the shit potentially falling off of it, or touching somewhere, yeah... no. Standing I have better control.

I squat.
>no toilet to obstruct
>ass cheeks naturally spread apart
>mobility gains

I do that too, i genuinely dont understand how people do it any other way? How are you supposed to check if the papers clean? Bring it in front of your face? Thats fucking retarded.

>Here in Greece we don't throw the wipes inside the toilet
what the fuck lol

unless im in one of those shitty stalls with the high rising doors and walls I squat. Otherwise I awkwardly quarter squat.

Brah your bathrooms must fucking stink 24/7

I know, I learned from Jow Forums that this is not the case with the most of the rest of the world.
I guess its due to shitty plumbing system, which is kind of ironic if you think that ancient Greece had such systems when the rest of the world were shitting wherever.

Nah, usually the bins are closed on the top.

Like you wipe from the back to the front, sitting?

How do you read the paper while wiping? Are you wiping your arse on the sport section?

Here in Brazil too

Greece has taken a serious nosedive in recent millennia

>reaching your hand into a filthy bowl of shit and piss water multiple times
>not seeing how clean your wipes are
you're the dirtiest faggot

Cheeks stay spread while sitting, if you stand first any residual shit gets smooshed in your ass crack

wait....people don't sit when wiping?

it's called a squat weakfag

>standing to wipe
enjoy your shitty asshole

I'm beginning to see the merit in sit wiping. However the motion of getting the paper down there seems awkward.

Has anyone tried those european arse washers? I have some questions
>don't your clothes get wet?
>doesn't shitty water splash out the bowl?
>what if someone, perhaps a date, hear you use it and create awkwardness

real man coming through

both first sitting, 100% cleanup standing

and for women its standing only so they dont wipe poop into their vagoo

you're welcome for the clarity

pic rel

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Technically i stand but its not like im standing up verticle, i just raise myself up while legs apart and wipe.

I dont want to put my hand in the toilet bowl thats fucking disgusting

>poop in vagoo
>poop on back of ballsac
truly a prime specimen

>Holding in a giant shit so that it rubs your prostate and you cum
Anyone else do this?

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Not using a bidet. You guys are barbarians. Get with the times you baby boomers.

>Having such a shit diet that wrecks your stomach to the point where wiping is a chore

This thread smells like murica

I installed bidets in all of my toilets. Toilet paper is for barbaric faggots

>He doesn't know about the doing both master race.

Sit wipe once to get any dangling clumps off safely over the bowl so you don't risk anything falling on your clothes. Stand for the rest of wiping to get maximum cleanliness.

Don't think you're limited by tribes. You can have it all.

HAHAHA HERE IS A SCENARIO THAT ANYONE CAN RELATE WITH, I BET YOU DO IT LIKE THIS INSTEAD OF LIKE THAT LMAO WHAT A LOSER AMIRITE EVEN THOUGH NEITHER HAS ANY IMPLICATION IN ONE'S LIFESTYLE OR WELL BEING

I used to be a sitter when I was a kid, up until I was 10 years old or so. One day my mom suddenly barged into the bathroom while I was wiping and told me that standing up to wipe is better, so I took her advice. Now I'm a stand to wipe guy.

My first wipes are in a sitting position then I stand and reach for the sink to slightly wet the paper for the last wipes.

I sit wipe BUT I lean to my left side, spread my right cheek with left hand, and then I wipe ;)

>not seeing how clean your wipes are

Do you not have the brain capacity to bring it up to examine. Or arw you too retarded to even think of that possibility

U guys stand? Wtf? U have to sit to get the most surface possible to actually clean out ur asshole, if u stand u can get through because of ur asscheeks.

this is the only true alpha way to wipe. Learn how to wipe correctly you retarded faggots

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Some people spread their cheeks apart while sitting.

I think it's ridiculous... standing is perfectly fine but I honestly have been using a bidet for over 5 years now anyway...

I spit on the toilet paper before the last wipe.

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I didn’t even know that everyone didn’t stand up tbqh desu

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I feel like you could get sick by doing that user.

Me as well, thank God im not the only one
Not him but ya. It allows me more dexterity with my hands for the cleanest possible bung hole.

Women wipe seated.

You still wipe even with a bidet you mong

I wipe seated. From back to front. One hand to wipe and the other to grab my balls

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He doesn't know

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guess that makes me a girl wanna fuck

Yeah where u live

Stop being gay

This. Stand wipers are filthy.

I wipe sitting like Buddha. With spread legs and laughing. And I wash my ass afterwards.

We don't?

Speak for yourself

>At work gotta take a shit
>Completely strip in the stall and walk around naked
>Use entire roll of toilet paper when I wipe
>My standard position is propping my right leg up on the seat so I can get a clear angle to clean

My ass is too big. I must spread the cheeks.

Thats how I do it. A.are we deviants?

I'm too big to fucking sit and wipe, my hand wont fit in there without smearing shit on my hand.

I wipe from the front. Didnt realise almost nobody does this till high school.
I dont even understand the mechanics of wiping from behind.

I don't know why this dude is the only one to say it

I squat when I shit and I squat when I wipe. It truly is the most Jow Forums way.

For the first 22 years of my life I was a stander, confident that it was the best option. I had a shoulder operation which forced me to adjust to sitting. I see now that it is objectively better.

Same. I sit and reach between my legs. Don't understand how you'd do anything else, it requires no re-positioning outside lifting your junk out of the way.

Well economy is tough, gotta reuse the paper. If it helps, I could send you my used toilet paper as donation as well.
Imagine, you'd be the richest man in all greece.
>can use double layer of finest reused toilet paper
>chicks all over him

imagine standing up only to realise your mushing your shit covered cheeks together Lovely.

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This is Mexico tier poorfaggotry

If they stand it's more likely for poo to run into vagoo you absolute brainlet. Anyone who stands while wiping is a filthy animal.

>he wipes
lmao

>I also sit when I pee. I am male.
If I'm in public I stand, but at home it's always sit to pee

They literally taught us in high school to wipe front to back so we don't get shit on our genitals. I learned this in health class.

truly the patrician choice

I stand. And by that, I mean I handstand.