HALP ME, FITIZENS

Sup fit,

I need ideas for exercises because my body looks retarded.

Current sitch:
>poorfag, living in a boat with little room to move
>DYEL skinny fat mode
>Armlet
>Decent frame on me, but too high bf% (21%) & tough to lose weight in midsection

I’m currently fasting daily to cut bf, BUT MY ARMS & CHEST ARE TOO SMALL and I look imbalanced as fuck. I have broad shoulders though, and pick up muscle fairly easily

What I need:

Calisthenics for upper body, biceps especially, *that don’t require a pull up bar*

TLDR: How do I get bigger biceps & arms without pull up bar?

Thanks, brehs

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those tattoos. Sad! Many such cases.

Wouldn't touch her even if I drunk a ton. Tattoos on a girl = would never fuck.

Fair. Dat hip to waist ratio, tho!

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good news bud, she wouldn’t fuck you either

U gay mate

I'd totally destroy that pussy no qualms

Look up bodyweight exercises.
Do them.

gross

God damn why are girls with tattoos so fucking perfect

This is what you get for insulting his waifu!

General advice is general. Which specifically, breh?

not into degenerate chicks. Go stick your dick in a diseased slit. I'll pass for an actual attractive and virgin girl.

>implying you'd have the chance to reject a babe like that
Keep LARPing my man

OP here. Not my waifu, just another thot for attention obtaining purposes

This. Übermensch of Jow Forums please help us poorfags

Fucking push ups dumb dumb. The goat bodyweight exercise. Dips and rows also if you can use household shit to do them.
Also, you're not gonna gain much muscle if you're at a significant calorie deficit. To really gain muscle you need to be at a calorie surplus.
Also
>house boat
Lucky fuck

Get a job and get a gym membership. Also read Ss

OP here, something with the universal currency for the express purpose of obtaining information

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Do grab some pipe and put your foot on it.
Try to lift it by curling.
Isometrics are your only choice.
Really man,you don't have a pull up bar.
You probably do,but don't want to be seen working out.

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OP here, I can post something more Gay if that’s your preference

Push ups... thought they were good for triceps but not biceps? My tris are okay considering my current appearance, but shameful compared to anyone who lifts

>Calorie surplus
Losing weight in my midsection is priority for health & aesthetic reasons. I’d rather be otter mode than a neckless wonder if I had to choose. Going for medium build eventually, bigger than otter mode, but not big.

>houseboat
Not what you think it is. More like tiny boat. Imagine a small floating RV. I’m a poorfag, remember?

Thanks for the help, OP appreciates you!

>Ss
I know nothing. What is this book you speak of?

>Job.
I have one, working on a second (career). Still a poorfag for now. It is what it is.

OP here. Great advice. Palms up, or down?

>Megan Fox
Face game is 10/10

First of all, what boat
second, swim fag
third push-ups in sets
fourth get dat fisch

>fisch

Come again?

Oh so it was Megan Fox,thanks.
You could try doing planks with your hands only reverse.
And try to place the stress on the biceps,by leaning forward.
Or lean over the deck and hold on to some thing,and don't let yourself fall.
>inb4 op does this and drowns
I better not hear about this on the news.
How did you find a job?
I'm 18 and about to finish High school
I also need a job.
I have never had one.
What do I need to do?

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OP here, bumping with something different. More ideas, lads!

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>2018
>virgin girl

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da fish da pescado da fisch some jung flounder, fluke flounder bb

> tfw best friend and flat mate was Chad
> once jokingly told me that I wont find a virgin girl above the age of 14
> tfw now 10 years later I dont think he was joking

nigger what boat do you have

You wont, and if you do somehow, she will have horrific mental problems and insecurities

>what boat
27’ sailboat
>swim
San Francisco Bay is dirty as shit. No thanks
>Fisch
See above. Dirty fish.

A bunch of dudes are sitting here talking about how they will never have a virgin.
Meanwhile I am sitting over here in my country and can go into a village or a small city and get a 16-18 virgin wife.
Its fun,and I am from Europe too.

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>an actual attractive and virgin girl.
Hahahahaha niggah you dying alone and sexless

Hey op,can you afford bands?
If you can you could train your biceps easy.
If not just do planks and lean forward,use only your arms.

Just a heads up, she isnt a virgin

I bet the frequency of those brap flaps flapping around when she braps is too low for the human ear to hear.

>27'
Dude you can literally sail anywhere in the world.
Go to Jueno for the summer or go to the east coast (master race)

You don't even know what country I am from.

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>bulgaria
O M E G A L U L
M
E
G
A
L
U
L

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It doesnt matter. Any woman anywhere can ask any man to fuck them and they have about a 90/10 chance to succeed. Probably higher. Even when faced with the death penalty, Muslim women fuck before marriage and just bite themselves to bleed during sex so the guy thinks she was a virgin

Don't pretend.
I know who you are.

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OP here
>inb4 op does this and drowns
I Lel’d

>Job
Dunno M8. Depends where you live, what your local economy is, how much you need, how much you want to work, etc.

I’m a Califag, and work in the Dude Weed industry. Used to pay well, doesn’t anymore, so transitioning out. Still pays alright sometimes, but not enough to live in the
>Bay Area
I know, I know. Leaving Ca soon.

Anyways, working in weed has shown me that there are myriad local industries that need specialized workers, that will train you and pay you well if you’re game to put in the time.

Other options that can be great:

-Flipping stuff on eBay. Apparently easy to do and profitable as fuck. One of my old weed buddies is doing this now & supporting his senpai. Lots of online tutorials on how to do this

-work for your local stagehands union. Good money. Hard work, but easy and physical. On the job training. And you’re doing work for the entertainment industry, which is fun

-Manwhoring. Whore your young fit self out to old ladies for fun and profit. J/K, let me think more on it

Op here
>Bands
Solid choice. Perfect for my sitch. Thanks for the advice, kind sir!

How the fuck,can she lie like that?
Women get torn hymen and bleed.
How the fuck is she not a virgin,and bits herself to bleed.
And he buys it.
How retarded are those muslims.
Yes I know a pretty woman can do this.
I'm just saying its rarer here than in western Europe.
Also who is this woman?
I think I have seen her somewhere.
Maybe on TV before.

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True story

It's not rarer. Anyone going through puberty experiences the same insatiable lust everyone else does. Some cultures are just better liars.
But yeah it's a thing to bite a finger during sex to draw blood and then use your hand on his dick or yourself when it's done.

Well I am from Bulgaria.
And I have a technical degree.
I am a Computer Specialist.
But I really don't want to work with them.
>Stagehands
I will try to find it.

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OP here, just gonna come out and say it:

Virgins are overrated.

I’ve had both virgins and experienced women. I’ll take the experienced every time. Skills > naivety

>in b4 a roastie will never be loyal

1. There’s “shades” of experience between roastie & virgin. I’m not going for all out mudflaps, but a girl who knows herself is much sexier. Better sex is worth it. Less annoying clinginess is worth it.

2. A virgin can still get curious/ hypergamous and leave you. I’ve seen it happen many times

3. You lads want to be strong physically, but it’s impotant to be strong emotionally too. That means developing yourself to the point that you’re not REKT if she leaves you. You can’t avoid girls moving on, all you can do is be mentally strong enough and attractive enough as a man that it’s not a big deal.

>In b4 STD’s

Just pick a chick that takes good care of herself and her health. Don’t confuse quality for “brand new”

God damn that face is 100%

>Stagehands

No idea how that work in Europe. Learn to market online or flip on eBay. Live wherever in the world and profit....

BRAAAAP

Yeah I have heard this before.
If you are good at sex.
The virgin will become clingy at you.
Eventually her friends who are not virgins,will talk her into trying some fun,at a club,or a party.
Without you,as long as you don't know.
The truth is that we live in a culture that allows women to be whores,no matter what woman is,she is a social creature.
She imitates her surroundings.
Fucking kikes.

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Need BRAP meme pics. Dump?

Here is a proper BRAP material.
Lets see you OP.

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Women were always whores, its part of
Evolution. History just obscured that fact for centuries. Why do you think these (((tricks))) of (((cultural engineering))) Work? Because we are wired for it.

Just fuck the bish good, and she’s more likely to stick around. Women are opportunistic, never forget it. Even the sweet cute ones. And never forget that your woman is not your mother, and will resent you the more you put her in that role. Don’t try to get your emotional fulfillment from women. They seem sweet and sensitive, but they’re not. Get your emotional stability from your friends, get pleasure from women. Choose a woman who will be a good partner or mother to your kids, but never assume she’ll stay loyal. As soon as she has babies, her loyalty will be to the children, not to you. It’s an ugly fact of life, but look around and look closely. It’s real.

If you hold women in you life loosely, you can keep them. If you hold them tight, they become disgusted and will slowly move to cuck or replace you.

I know women were always whores.
Hell.
2/3 of the children men raised,weren't theirs.
I just like to delude myself.
Let me be OP.

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>Lets see you OP

What do you mean?

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Fair enough, breh. No disrespect intended, just looking out for ya

>Need BRAP meme pics. Dump?
I thought it was you.

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Not what I meant. I want pics of characters sniffing, not ass pics. I have enough of those, Lol

>Not what I meant. I want pics of characters sniffing, not ass pics. I have enough of those, Lol

I have enough pictures of ass.
>Implying it is ever enough.

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OP here.

Thanks for the advices, Jow Forumsizens, gonna go do planks off the side of my boat now, lol

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>dat .gif

I kek’d

You have a boat, go live your life. Sail to bumfuck wherever dude.

Ahh,but remember to do them with two arms only.
And you should lean forwards for extra gains.
We don't want you to look stupid,now do we?
Let this be your motto OP.
Write it on your boat,or print it.
When you pass another boat,sink it.
Race with it ,and sink it.

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The fuck does that have to do with having biggers arms? Don’t get ahead of yourself there, fella

Gotta agree with this guy. That's some primo ass and it looks like you're making shit excuses for not finding that attractive. Eat a dick cunt.

Never a wasted opportunity to hate ;)

Never change, 4 Chan

Jelly is always obvious

remove the cleat or block from the mainsheet and that is a pretty good arm workout mans

Hay.
I am just giving OP some friendly advice.
What makes it seem hateful.
I like OP.

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Btw Jelly-Fags, boat coat $3000 + maintainence + gad + slip free ($380/Mo)

It’s cheap living, so don’t be butthurt okay? It’s basically a glorified trailer

Pic related is what you should be Jelly of:

Across the water from me are $1,000,000 + houseboats

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nigga, I have a 22' Catalina. Sailing is all I know. My family is lucky enough to have a mooring too.

I fucked a girl my freshman year of college, just found out now (3yrs later) that I took her virginity. You might just never find out.

The measures people go to,to avoid niggers.
God damn.
Admirable.
Good thing they can't swim.
Kek.
OP
How much would a good sized boat for a a living coast you?
I heard your boat was 27 something,it was small in google images.
I bet you can't bring women there,or friends.

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anyone who owns a houseboat should be shot.

tfw you live on an island that doesn't even lift.

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You are fortunate, user

Her tats look nicer than most

latinas are disgusting

What the fuck is a houseboat? Just call it a boat you mental midget

Sausalito, Ca.
Area is:

1- Niggerless
2- Rich as fugg

I have brought women here (slain 2 since I’ve been on the boat). But usually I go to their place, since low cost living can be a turnoff, lol. Friends are OK, 100%. We grill meat on the boat on summer nights when it’s not too windy.

Cost is cheap. See Basically $380 for my slip + gas + $2k every 12-24 Mo in maintainence. But since the boat is small, I eat out more as I have no fridge. Also, I’m here illegally since the state of (((California))) will only allow a small amount of liveaboards as per the law here. So if I’m caught, I’m out. If I were to pay liveaboards fees, you could add $400/Mo to the 380 I said above.

If I wanted to just drop anchor in the water and take a dinghy in to land, I could theoretically live for free, but then I have issues like internet, showers, transporting food, and secure parking to worry about, all of which are provided with the slip fee.

It’s a small but decent life. For now.

Disagree 100%. Latinas are God Tier.

Because it is barely a boat. It is more of a floating dock with creature comforts.

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Google it, breh. There’s a difference between a boat and a houseboat.

Houseboat = tiny home that floats.
Boat = vehicle that can live in

Weighted jump rope. Basically a full body exercises + weighted ropes are great for beginners because they help you co-ordinate your body with the rope

My bad. I read
>Sink it
Thought that was aimed at me. Sorry, good sir

I forgot the mention OP.
When you buy bands,be careful not to turn the boat upside down.
I am serious.
How heavy are those things.
You wan't to put the bands on your feet and curl,but you can also row,if you tie it around a sturdy object.
Be careful user.
I told you I don't want to hear about a drowning.
KEK.

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Really? For upper body? Thought that was cardio-tier

Hearty lulz.

Nah, boat has weight at bottom to avoid tipping over. Think weekly wobble

Fucking autocorrect.

*Weebly* Wobble

I mean you aren't going to get HUGE but it'll def. work out your shoulders/chest etc.

Sweet. Like dis?

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Tight > thicc

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Agreed

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+1

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Optimal body type

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