You wake up as eggman

Also
>eye fillers
>trip to Brazil fuck some spots and get a tan
>a couple of tats
>most of all stop the self pity and learn game and allow self love and confidence to fill you up

I've seen uglier men land decent chicks it's his personality self doubt and depression that makes him so revolting to women

He was dating

try to capture that damn hedgehog

I actually read this as "learn to kill yourself and be of service to others" kek

heh

This. Eggy successmogs me.

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Ahaha holy fuck I didn’t hear it like that but I def felt like I did

Kek

>be egg
>be also man somehow

the story continues

You will meed a very cool jacket to make that work

Can Jow Forums diagnose eggman? What is wrong with him? I'm thinking severe hashimotos which is causing hypogonadism along with other

BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
Jesus Christ is this omega head porn

Look for nearest cliff.

Jump and hope for decent respawn.

christ

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He has an interesting face
I definitely don't think he's doomed. He's only doomed if he keeps up his self deprecating attitude

Four agreements is shit tier reading my boi
>we wuz toltecs n shiet

rope

For starters, get a haircut, eyebrows styling(minoxidil + trimming) and lower bodyfat

he prolly has high estrogen

>high estrogen
>womanly appearance
I'd get on test ASAP

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>get off social media and make an effort to force small talk on strangers
>hair cut
>buy facial cleaner, exfoliate
>since fat, buy a bunch of nice black shirts and get a subtle gold necklace
>clean shave face, get nose/eyebrow/ear hair and cut nails
>quit smoking and alcohol, drink 3L water/day
>after a week of cessation go to intermittent fasting
>run a 7 day/week barbell complex circuit or join crossfit if he can afford it (this type of workout will melt the fat off his ass); workout and ride my bike with earbuds in (for meditation gains)
>since he works at a gas station, switch to some entry level IT job like data entry then order a book for some entry level IT certs

>be an idiot
>falling for every meme
pick both

all he needs to do is lose about 25 lbs, lift weights, get a tan, a haircut and stop smoking/eating shit
he has a funny personality and his facial structure would be decent if he wasnt a chubby tubby

too narrow camera lenses

>become a wow pvp overlord
>get rich by streaming and pvping like a baws
>do cardio almost daily
>lift weights but not heavy, only upper body
>maybe roids
>buy sunglasses and wear them all the time
>fuck ugly cunts

i almost wish i was born a ugly subhuman.
i could be free of "making it" and live life just as i enjoy it without "normies" problems, responsibilities, struggles that come with expectations of being normal-tier human

An autistic kid (who's really nice btw) handed me a copy because he thought I'd like it and I couldn't take it seriously because it was to basic and condescendingly simply worded, but the information would definitely be helpful to someone who was lacking it.

>gold necklace

I already know what you must look like :7(

stop browsing Jow Forums for starters

What a guy

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>watch every video by Mike Mew about orthotropics
>become the poster-child for orthotropic therapy
>overthrow the Orthodontic Jew that shackles a man's teeth with wire and chain instead of recommending a hardy diet and proper facial posture
>make money as a marketing tool and regain confidence

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He is too old to start mewing and see a noticeable difference big enough to be the poster boy. And to be honest with or without a good jaw eggman always will be eggman.

Crack and cook myself what do u expect me to do id be meant for breakfast