/r9gay/ - #392

>ywn fuck malf into a crying mess and cuddle afterwards

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what a ugly fat fuck

If you could stop making these threads, that would be terrific. Thanks.

This.
We don't need these shitty threads.

>go to a gay board
>on a gay website
>complain about gay

You're not very bright are you?

Very good post
and original

Yes, as a robot faggot i think these threads should get nuked. Theyre always /soc/ tier.

No bully, MALF is cute in his own way.

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>NL and Malf-posting when you could be posting this hottie

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Ah fuck it's Ryan with hair.
Dan looks really nice and all but i still prefer Ryan, he has a better personality in my opinion. Looks don't matter as much as personality.

Based Dan, still the greatest imo

Ryan has the most snobby and pretending-to-be-nice personality i've ever seen

You just activated my trap card, boys!

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>don't know if prison gay or not
>don't have to worry about it since I won't have occasion with either male nor female to test it
Ha! Take that my sexuality
Also my snuff ran out, and dont have money to buy new one.
Also I just finnished ARH, beacause I saw someone recomending it on /cm/ and now it feels both nice and empty WHY THE FUCK THERE ISN'T DOWNLOAD ANYWHERE FOR IT, FOR FAK SAKE

Classic blunder user, reading ARH is the easiest way to induce a case of >tfw no bfsies.
>tfw no Adrian bf

I'm going to have sex next month I think but I'm a NEET so I can't exactly get a douche but I've been thoroughly scrubbing my ass every day when I shower. Is that going to be enough to avoid shit getting on my boyfriend's dick?

LEARN FROM THIS MAN, ANONS
NAKED OVERALLS, EVERY TIME
IT IS SIMPLY, THE BEST................

No, eat a high fibre diet and poop before you two fug, or just invest the money already you despicable normie.

Use a plastic bottle, ideally one with the nipple-suck thing on it.

>tfw my name is adrian
Also also, did I missed something, but why the fuck does he wear first aid bag around with him

Walk into drugstore.
Go to butt problems aisle.
Pick an enema. They're like 3 bucks.
Go to cashier with big grin.
If they say something just be like, "Yeah yeah! I'm a sodomite!"
Get your enema and skip out the door.

>Tfw still no bigger than me bf who would make life worthwhile somehow even though that's almost completely impossible and no one would want me anyway, even if someone was interested me i would not be able to talk to them because i am scared of screwing things up

How was everyones day? And how is the night going?

Get a turkey baster or something user. Poop first then flush it out with water. There might still be some brown. Deal w/ it nerd.

>remember that im barrel chested
>urge to kms rises
Why do i even fucking bother to try?

I think it was just a normal bag which coincidentally had a red cross on it. At the very least it definitely never gets addressed.
Are you also a cute, hardworking, slightly immature redhead?

I'm funnel chested user, i know your pain.
Ain't a reason to kys though. I'm still going to do it though, because of other problems.

death seem to be the only solution for me

Solution? It doesn't solve anything you dipshit.

its not really a solution to anything but i think people who tell others that life is worth living without knowing your situation are virtue signaling faggots.
if you really think life is shit and will never get any better. go for it.

Not a single one of these, just a name correlation
Good luck searching tho
Is there single goodlooking redhead(male)?

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Alright here's the deal. My boyfriend has a high libido and WILL want to fuck multiple times a day when he's over. The problem is that I hear douching too much can be harmful. How many times do I have to douche to be prepared for so many poundings?

I've just woken up so not much to say about my day so far, the past couple of days I've been back at university after changing my degree. I'm pretty excited for the new direction, although I'll probably have fewer career options it's way less soul crushing. My one complaint is that there are very few cute boys in my classes, and in every one so far a girl has come and sat next to me despite other seats being free.
How about you user? What's going on in your life?

>full time job with good benefits
>just want a cute boy to treat well
>closeted

I don't even know where to start to look

It would stop me from hating myself

thanks, someone who tells the truth

>My boyfriend
Oh, fuck off, go to Jow Forums or /soc/ or wherever people like you go.

>How many times do I have to douche
Until the buttwater comes out clear

They are a rare breed. Once in a while you see one you like. I like this one although I realize he probable wouldn't be branded exceptionally good looking by most folks.

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They're extremely rare, but I've met at least two. Peak redhead is when they look at least slightly feminine, the colour doesn't suit extremely masculine men.

also read this
howtocleanyourass.wordpress.com/

Online would be a good place to start. That way you can still have a fairly fulfilling relationship without anyone else knowing.

Brag about it some more, why don't you?

Christ that's a lot of fucking work. I guess thay's the curse of being a fag though. I have some shopping to do.

Thought he was sucking the guys cock

>Is there single goodlooking redhead(male)?
>They are a rare breed.
They are indeed rare. They are also my mortal weakness. I'm part Irish, and have fantasies about meeting a cute shy redheaded guy with an irish accent. We could drink whiskey, sing off key, argue about literature, do naughty things the Good Lord doesn't approve of.

>howtocleanyourass.wordpress.com/
lulz, that's pretty great

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adrian pedale jebany

Mango chamomile ice tea with a hint of mint

Don't bully my husband, thanks

Co obrazasz kurwa.
Virginem jestem, wiec nie jebany kutaszonie

>tfw no bf to cuddle and watch documentary all day with.

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>Virginem jestem
haha

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I hope war documentaries

>not a reason to kms
I have other problems too, im just too bad for this world so its either me wasting time and being sad all the time or suicide. Which one is better?

Have a nice life everyone, most of you deserve nice bfs and i hope you get them one day.

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poland is the gayest country in the world

Feel exactly the same way. How are you planning on killing yourself?

You deserve a nice life and bf too user :)

>tfw psycho dad will never be your bf
It hurts...

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Archives
But that's all I'll spoonfeed you, user, since you called it r9kgay.

I've asked this before due to self-confidence issues, and after being cajoled into self-posting by linking to another thread or posting on imgur, I don't recall which, and I've been told that I am a good-looking redhead (male).

>g9gay discord
it sucks doods

But how would you like to be my good-looking redhead (male)?

If there were even the slightest chance that we were within 3 hours travel from each other, as well as had complimentary looks and personalities, then I'd jump at the chance. But sadly I already know that's not the case, thanks to the cb law.

>But sadly I already know that's not the case, thanks to the cb law.
How the fock you know that?
You live on antarctica or what?

It's true, so let's get the hardest step over with right now. Where are you from?

first post i've seen on Jow Forums in a while that made me genuinely laugh

The cb law states that the cuteness and/or comparability of a boy is directly proportional to the inverse square of his distance from you

Southeast USA

That was meant to say compatibility, my apologies

Well, I'll live within three hours of you after the invention of personal teleporters.

gin and tonic is better than gay sex

Why not both
Also Rum and cola is better

i can't drink but i can have sex. in theory.

because gays are icky
so is cola

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>watch a twitch streamer because he's cute and sometimes talks about lewd stuff

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>i can't drink
Why tho, are you sick or something like this?
what does icky mean?

well, which one are you talking about?

Who's the streamer? Is he gay? Does he play good games or is it just LoL/Fortnite/Overwatch.

It means gross, user.

I think my only hope is some kind of mail order husband from some poor euro country, is that even a thing.
who wants to move to American and be my house husband, you only have to cook and clean and be happy to see me when i get home from work and of course like my dog and make your holes available for me 24/7.

>go get dinner cuz no food in the house
>drive past two shirtless guys
>probably just went swimming in the lake
>clear skin and wide muscular shoulders
>literally turn my head to gawk at them
>caught a glimpse of abs and pecs
>this is the most action i'll get all year

someone said "you're such have gay let's fuck" and he said sure so maybe.
He's playing Thousand Year Door right now
prezoh

*and he said "sure", so maybe
also i can't drink because i'm 19. but i also can
t smoke because the smoking age here is 21

it means something similiar tpo you doggy daddy

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They exist but it works best if you romance them a bit instead of opening with cooking, cleaning and making holes available. Sadly a green card isn't worth so much these days.

that was just sort of letting them now my expectation of marriage, of course i dont want to be with someone who i dont have a romantic interest in, they need to be someone who gets my jokes and has similar interest and we both have to be each others types so thats why i think i have no chance.

>also i can't drink because i'm 19
Who cares?
I'm from country where you need to be 18 to legaly drink, and I was getting shitfaced by 16, on local closed quarry with 4 other friends
I think I got it.

>talking more and more with the boy (female)
>starting to develop feelings
>he's actually located relatively close to me
>has talked about meeting up sometime in the future
oh god oh god oh god

well hello there my future husbando

>had a dream i had the perfect bf

ITS NOT FAIR! IM GOING BACK IN!

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>female
Why are you even in this thread

He's a gay male, as am I. I'm no SJW, but I respect trans people; plus, he's a bottom, so it doesn't make all too much of a difference in the long run, anyway.