You have a billion dollars

But the catch it you'll only have it for a day. What do you do?

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Buy all the bitcoins and watch it grow to 100 billion within a year.

probably nothing, because when the magical money disappaears a whole lot of ppl are gonna feel scammed and Im gonna be in a lot of trouble, cause I knowingly put 1 billion magicaka fake dollars into circulation

>Buy a fuckton of land
>Sell it back as needed

Not like I lose any money.

It would probably be very hard to close on any property deals within 1 day due to title company bullshit

Deposit into my bank account. I wont have the money in a literal sense because the bank distributes it into hedge funds or loans. The bank however will be in debt to me for 1 billion dollars
Brainlet that's never bought property before
Brainlet that has never bought crypto before

Pretty sure depositing 1 billion in cash is gonna take a while as well

I have 1 billion dollars to work with, plenty enough to bribe everyone as needed. Would I succeed? Probably not because autism but this is just an imaginary scenario.

assuming the money ceases to exist
>buy 1 billion dollars worth of stock
>sell them before the day ends
>keep the profit
even a rise of 0.1% would net you $1,000,000

Buy Facebook, Google, and Amazon stock

Even depositing all this money would probably take much longer than just a day so I will distribute my money to my family members accordingly and they will hold the cash and keep a share of the money themselves. They can go to multiple banks to deposit the money

If we start at 8 in the morning will have a good 9 to 10 hours to deposit all the money.

oh right you can't deposit money without proof of how you earned it. lol

Good luck trying to convince people to go along with it and not sound like a scam artist, even if you didnt have autismo

t. brainlet who has never deposited money

Invest it in something that will make me more money duh. The question you should be asking is what we would do with that money.

Go to a car dealership and buy everything on the lot. If needed, pay them to bring in more people to handle the paperwork. Repeat as many times as possible in one day.

Cash deposits are always available instantly, but it has to be a sum of 1500$ or below or not exceed your average year balance. If it does you'll have to speak with the account manager to move the money which takes weeks to finish. You can't go to a currency broker either because the money has to be transferred to the bank which results in the same problem.


No matter how you look at it you'll lose money. Unless there's a place where you can deposit your money that's not regulated by government. You can't buy crypto currency either because that requires a bank account.

>you'll only have it for a day.
If I give my money away. The statement will still be true, but will it disappear once it's in the hands of another person? If that's the case then I'll just sign a document giving all my money to my brother. I'll leech off him for the rest of my life. If no I"ll just go to the most expensive jewlery shops and empty out their shops and then disappear to mexico. I'll also take an Aston martin and a 2 million dollar mobile home

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>invest in bitcoin
>lose the money even before the day ends

burn buy a bunch of static assets then sell them back later

>But the catch it you'll only have it for a day. What do you do?
buy real estate

This, i would give it all to my brother, and make a deal that he gives me half back tomorrow

Buy the most expensive prostitute I could find for the entire day lmao

buy a shit tonne of highly priced items, gold, diamonds, ect and then after the dollars are gone sell off the items i bought to get roughly the same amount of money or slightly less

>Buy billion dollars worth of platinum
>Short sell about 100 million worth of it in the market
>Use 100 million I gained from that transaction to buy platinum again
>Instantly market stabilizes
>New jobs all require Platinum catalysts
>They use it since I made it cheap by plunging 100 million worth into market
>Initial demands are met with a stable market
>Demands after 6 months though when need new platinum must come to me
>Become platinum baron of the world and use my monopoly for immense profits

Buying a consumable with an Industrial value and stable demand is always a plus. Add to it the fact that its a precious metal sub and voila.

Give it to someone I trust and have them give me half the next day.

t. brainlet who has never purchased anything outside of retail
t. brainlet who thinks he can buy a billion fucking dollars of rare earth metals from out of nowhere in a single day
This is alright I suppose. Just be careful of the pimp. She'll probably have ties with really powerful mafia niggas.

>for the day
Nigger you could LITERALLY buy her with that amount of money

>Brainlet who has done nothing except calling others brainlet
If you have done any trading at any level, you know how easy metals bond trading is. I have been doing precious metal trading for the past 2 and a half years. Obviously nowhere near even a million dollars but with post dated contracts and futures market, you can buy a billion dollars worth of metals a day without even a splash

and you're just gong to roll up on your trailer with a billion dollars and expect them to count ever single bill.

Good job brainlet you played yourself

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Pay someone to count it. Duh.

It doesn't say it's cash anywhere in the OP.
And what kind of physical currency magically disappears after one day?
The most logical conclusion is that it's $1 billion in credit that must be repaid after 24 hours.

Dumb animeposter

NO I assumed I had control of fully liquidated trust for a day after which, they take their control back but I cankeep what I spend irreversibly or it goes away to them. Seriously though fren, you need to get IQ tested

Go to a financial advisor and get a stock profile.

Spend three quarters of it on stocks and real estate and land.
Spend a few thousands buying gold bricks .
Spend a few thousands buying dumb shit.
Get a secure bank account in Panama or switzerland.

The rest goes to charity to wash away my sins.

Id buy a plane,warbird preferably. I dont even know how to fly or use the radio, I just want a god damned plane.

Id invest the rest in environmental conservation

I hire assassins to murder as many incels as possible

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Buy a separate stack of billion dollars

Loan out a million dollars to 1,000 people

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Give it to my mother so it's not mine anymore, and ask for some when I need the money.

Heroin, buy a lot of gold, high class escorts and then some more heroin.

Jerk off on it before i have to give it back

>Buy a nice house, pay a reliable cleaning lady upfront for like 60 years, invest in stocks, buy all the electronic equipment I need for the moment, buy loads of good food and drinks
>pay for an entire vacation in iceland, with all the nicest hotels where the food is included. Go buy a fuckton of clothes to last me for years.
>Buy all the games, movies and books I'll want to consume for the moment.
>Whatever money is left I'll invest in stocks and maybe like a couple million into crypto.
>Hire a financial advisor to help me manage my shit, and a private psychiatrist/doctor and yoga teacher to keep my physical and mental health in check.
>Buy a metric buttload of psychedelics and adderall for when I need it.
>pay for whatever college degree I feel like, probably something like art since I won't need money anyway, just to have something to pass the time and earn a little cash of my own.
>and lastly, hire a really good escort to fuck me that night

That's the plan, now all I need is a billion dollars

Trolling outside of /b/

You're the same fucking faggot from the thread about r9k
I hope you get permabanned, Christ

That's actually smart but who will enforce the payment and where will you find 1,000 people who need 1,000 and are willing to sign a contract?

What thread about Jow Forums? Are you gay or something?

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If you were able to do all this in a day you would already be rich you neet.

Buy 1 billion fake bills and give them to back in place of money, hide the real money and wait a few years.

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what does this even mean? if i put a billion dollars into bitcoin right now, does that disappear too? a billion dollars worth of a commodity is still a billion dollars

It's clear what your purpose is in this board.
If mods don't ban you they clearly have a troll bias and I will finally depart for other image boards

>this kills the man

If i knew exactly when I'd get it I'd have all the plans ready to go, all the financial documents filled out so I only had to transfer the money. Then it'd all be done before lunchtime probably.

Hey maybe next time you can post a link right away? I post a lot you see. Or does that require too much thinking power? Can't you think ahead that far? I could probably beat you in chess in less than 5 moves HAHAHAHA

But seriously just so you know, Jow Forums isn't a serious board. They brought it back to life after it was dead for a few years because feelposters and incel fucktards were overrunning other, serious boards. The entire purpose of current Jow Forums is containment and for a good reason; incels are subhuman and shouldn't be mingling with normal people. You should go to wizchan

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Seeing as you're not banned yet that's probably a wise solution.
You might even be a mod, God knows at this point.

I'm not a mod and if I were I wouldn't be able to admit it cause then I'd lose moderator status

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Avatar posting reee click that big red x in the top right corner of the browser and go get ready for school you fag
Also I'd buy an absolute monster of a computer and peripherals, a fair amount of games, pay off college before I even go into debt, more guns, and invest the rest of it into a decked out doomsday bunker

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>deposit a billion into your bank
>government realizes you can't possibly have that much money
>audits you
>sees you never reported getting this billion dollars
>get executed for evading taxes on a billion dollars

Buy lots of drugs.

t. a mod

I wonder if hir0hit0 is paying you to get rid of us so he can make this website Reddit 2.0 for better ads

Haha I'm not a mod! I'm just Flowey! You're funny user

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Eww, an UndertaleFag. Go fuck a goat