Meet girl here in Jow Forums

>girl from r9k
You see, that is where you fucked up

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where did you meet the fembot user?

Ghosting someone is a million times more likely to make someone hate you than saying something they don't like.
Plus it's extremely rude to assume that they would turn on you just for something so insignificant.

That is a different story.
When you live across town that is normal. When you live in the east coast and the other in the west that is when you're just talking to a person who may not even be who they claim

Females are already trash, don't even get me started on the ones who browse this shit board. Beyond defective.

I am sure I made her understand that I was there for her. We all have flaws, but that is the real test; being able to improve together.

I checked the last conversations, but I can't see anything like that.

I am the kind of person that take these things seriously. If things work, I could buy a plane ticket and try my best.

I can't help it. I have contact with girls in real life too, but none of them share my ideas or interests (only being able to connect with r9k girls sure doesn't say anything good about me).

>Plus it's extremely rude to assume that they would turn on you just for something so insignificant.
Of all things you could come up with, 'rude' is what you thought of? You realize there are people in the world who have crippling trust issues for perfectly valid reasons? I am always second guessing everything I say to people and worrying about how they are secretly judging me, does that make me closer to a paranoid schizo or just "rude"?

It did turn out that he hadn't lied about who he was or his age, we had mailed each other gifts at some point, talked over the phone, and his contact info has his face now. It went on for a good while and I was closer to them than most people I went to school with.

I don't know, I'm not good with words.
Also if someone likes another person they're not going to be secretly judging them, that's completely counter productive.

You are woefully oblivious, user. I don't think you could convince me you're old enough to browse this board at this point.

>being able to improve together.
Well there's a chance, however small, that she cut contact because she only wanted to vent to you, and you genuinely believed that giving her advice on how to improve her life made her feel like there was pressure being put on her to stop venting. And on your behalf, nobody wants to be someone's emotional trashcan when they are doing nothing to reduce the amount of trash being thrown out.

>and you genuinely believed that giving her advice on how to improve her life
would help, but*
I always fucking do this shit, wtf am I developing dementia or something

You might be right, but I can not be sure. I would not mind being a "trash can", because we all need to relieve stress sometimes, but this is something else.

I just don't know. I feel frustration, betrayal, anger... but at the same time I can not blame her. Perhaps it is just me who built castles in the air, and I am a victim of my own delusions.

Doctor Flowey here I seem to have detected the problem.

Your fembot also fell in love with you and realized it didn't fix any of her real life issues and made her more depressed than before she met you. She either killed herself or she went off for a while to try and cool down and improve herself.

So what you should do is give her some time and space because if anything you just end up smothering her and driving her away from you. Everyone needs alone time, even you, despite the fact you were neglected as a child and try to binge on attention as a result.

Fag

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>I would not mind being a "trash can", because we all need to relieve stress sometimes, but this is something else.
This can turn into a neverending cycle of pointless emotional dumping and you would eventually get frustrated that the friendship was predicated on only that. She might have become aware of this and stopped talking to spare you the trouble, but also, she just might be withdrawing herself completely, or being plain rude.

This guy knows. Regardless of her reasons, the very last thing you should do is sperg out about it to her. I hope you found help here.

Why do relationships have to be so complicated? Why can't it be like with friends where you just chat and play vidya every once in a while, and not have so much confusing stuff attached?

The older you get, the more complicated it gets, because people develop health problems, drug addictions and do stupid shit they end up regretting forever, and despite what you might assume about oldfags, they are not that much more forgiving of a disturbing 'past' than kids in highschool.

Have you ever talked to someone with borderline personality disorder? Their only thoughts are about how people are judging secretly and how they will undoubtedly be abandoned because of inadequacy. People like that exist wether or not thoughts like that are rational

I stopped talking with you because I noticed you hide your feelings and you were not honest with me, thanks for confirming it you dipshit. You didn't say anything when i was feeling down, why would I talk with someone who doesn't care about me. Fag.

So it only gets worse then? Maybe I should just give up then, I wasn't made to understand this shit. I have no idea what other people feel or think, while other people know what other people feel just by the look on their face and by how they act, and I have no idea how they do it.

I guess not. I guess I just have a hard time understanding how other people think, it's already hard enough understanding how I think.

I'm literally schizotypal with massive accusatory delusions and I even I can tell this is extremely rude and selfish behavior user lol. Yes, it's due to shame and fear of judgement. No, that's not a blanket excuse or proper justification for leaving everyone in the dark. You are letting your irrationalities run rampant & unchecked at the cost of the feelings of those you interact with. It is self-centered. Someone responsible for themselves would ignore these fears and send a message regardless.

You're shaking in your boots over people you care about hating you, but guess what? The longer that fear is in control, and the longer you create the distance, the more they'll start to question why you don't give them the time. They'll make excuses and give you the benefit of the doubt at first but slowly, surely, it will morph into contempt. A cold grey disdain for someone that will only ever engage when it's beneficial to them. Someone who, at their core, couldn't give half of a shit for the needs of their friends. You're creating a self-fulfilling prophecy.

Good luck with that.

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>i'm literally insane, now listen to my advice
based retard

well thanks for this long-winded, unsolicited batshit tripe about how you can control severe paranoid delusions just by being urself
wow yeah basically

First of all, thank you for spending your time here, guys (and gals, I guess). Your words are important to me.

I am trying to give her some space. In fact I stopped sending anything for some days, and now I am waiting for her to write first.

>Fag
Love you too, wise-bro.

I know, but this is just the way I am wired. Giving emotional support is my drug, even though it only complicated my life.

W-who are you?

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>Giving emotional support is my drug, even though it only complicated my life.
This ruined my life. Just don't do it. It seems selfish, but you are responsible for you and you alone. It's idealistic to think your job is to support others before yourself.

I think we all have a hard time understanding how each other think user, just a fact of life

>about how you can control severe paranoid delusions just by being urself

This tells me you don't know the first thing about mental health and have never seriously entertained a therapy visit. What do you think "control" means? That those thoughts are no longer present?

I can tell that I very strongly struck a nerve, and it sounds like you aren't wanting to take responsibility for yourself today, so you can write me off as insane and go about your evening. You being the person not responding to their so-called friends and me being the person who is. Lol

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Don't fall for the larp. And even if it's not a larp, look, you lost nothing.

Wow, I never initiated contact with anyone so I never had an opportunity to ghost anybody in the first place, I am just trying to put myself in someone else's shoes in their defense because OP is assuming he's getting shafted. You really went out of your way to make this about yourself, you should find a better therapist.

In fact you are not the first person that gave me this advice. Is it too much if I ask about your personal experience?

I had some banter with what I presume to be a fembot yesterday, and while I'd love to talk more with them and talk shit on things while talking about the interesting stories I have, that's something I almost fear happening.

Though she did make me want to read Lovecraft again, so that's a plus

100% correct, kekking hard at the assblasted BPDfags saying its invalid because of a mental disorder, oh the hypocrisy

Hey man sorry to tell you this but I stole yo bitch.

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his point is that OP was shafted even if the girl felt that way bc its selfish behavior are u dumb as duck

>Is it too much if I ask about your personal experience?
I don't have a problem with telling you personally, but I posted some of it late last night, and I don't want to do it again here. I will say it's a lesson that I really hope does not need to be learned the hard way, and that you can just take the advice at face value and understand that codependency is mentally stifling.

It's selfish to think that way. Believe it or not you aren't owed any explanation as to why someone might stop talking to you and it's insanely self-centered to act as if you are. I'm sure a lot of robots have preemptively burned their bridges by responding like an asshole when something like this happens, but they get their just deserts by staying alone.

>it's okay that OP got ghosted, she was feeling anxious!
>it's okay that OP got punched, she was feeling paranoid!
>it's okay that OP got cheated on, she was feeling distant!
>it's okay that OP got murdered, she was having a psychotic episode!
>have some empathy guys!

There's not really any timewindow you can count on, you could be looking at weeks or months of silence. In the meantime this'll be a good growing experience for yourself. Find other things to do in the meantime, keep yourself busy. You can let her know you're giving her some space if she needs it and she's free to hit you up whenever she feels like it again.

I saw this great youtube video about it once but can't find it now. To develop a healthy and mature relationship you can't expect to be together 24/7. If she's busy, you're busy. That's how it works in this scenario. So keep yourself busy.

People want to be treated as equal, they don't want to be babied by someone who feels like they're better off than them. Treat them like you would treat yourself.

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Well that's a slippery slope if I've ever seen one. Autism in males is truly disturbing sometimes.

let's say your friend disappears for months at a time and/or does not respond when you need help vs always responding when they benefit. questioning this at all is selfish to you?

hmm lol methinks someone get stepped on in their lives

Considering I have a friend who just got out of jail and was locked up when I was going through a breakup, he has a perfectly valid excuse for not being able to contact me.
>"Sorry user, but I am going to get into a horrible car crash this afternoon and I'm going to be in a coma for 2 months. Hope you'll live without contacting me every day."

I respect that. Thank you, mate.

Interesting. I know these things, I even gave that same advice, but it is now (when a stranger reminds me) when I see it clearly. Perhaps I should take some distance too, to clear my head and take some fresh air.

I mean you aren't owed that in the most literal sense but most reasonable people would be giving an explanation unprompted if they cared for you. What kind of experiences have you had with your longtime and dear friends?

>hmm lol methinks someone get stepped on in their lives
Also this is some really serious projection.
>What kind of experiences have you had with your longtime and dear friends?
Nothing spectacular, but again, I'm not posting my life story here, so you can forget about making baseless assumptions about what I've been through. I can tell you I have never ghosted anyone because I know I would be tempted to do so if I were to initiate contact with someone from here only to find out they're using *me* as a crutch.

youre an actual idiot if you think this example fits into what people are talking about ITT
this is getting kind of sad

And you know he was in prison because he told you which defeats the example, you're as thick as a brick son lmfao

What's sad is your bizarre sense of entitlement and projection in the face of reason. Like the schizo before you, you've made this about yourself.

He told me after he got out, genius. I thought he was ignoring me at the time, I didn't piss and moan about it like a giant retarded baby before I found out.

>he doesnt know how to quote multiple people
are u trying to access www.reddit.com?

meet girl in r9k

larp af

I simply forgot, and now I can see you're just grasping at straws. Please stop trying to trick people into reproducing with you and leave me alone.

she told you she loved you and then stopped answering suddenly?

>He told me after he got out, genius

Again that is literally not what anyone ITT has been talking about. You have the reading comprehension of a mole rat

youtube.com/watch?v=Hvysy11716g
I found it god BLESS

Really, I don't get how someone can be so retarded that they think every time someone stops talking to them that it automatically means they were deemed to be genetically inferior. If I had no point of reference for understanding how insecure you must feel, I'd ask you why you even choose to stay alive.

Crying about being ghosted is the most pathetic. Discord chats are not real relationships.

10/10 thread for the absolute autist trying to defend ghosting. Never change Jow Forums

>can barely even form sentences anymore
are you literally shaking?

>its autistic to try and empathize with someone instead of shitting your pants every time the prospect for a potential relationship is marred by other people's pesky "feelings"

>can't read
>tells other people they can't read
100% potato

>if I twist what people are saying into retarded bullshit it sounds really bad

>Your fembot also fell in love with you and realized it didn't fix any of her real life issues and made her more depressed than before she met you.
I relate to this.

is English even your first language?

This actually makes sense! It is so easy to understand, and at the same time so hard to notice...

How is "Crying about being ghosted is the most pathetic" a full sentence?

I, for one, think anyone speaking out against ghosting to be abhorrent. Girls should be able to toy with who they please, they're allowed to drop you at a moment's notice without repercussion and it's a liiitle pathetic if you think otherwise. My darling Tammy ghosts me daily to have sex with her bulls and I don't say a thing! Yaaas Queen slaaaaay!!!!

Since you're a 3rd grade English teacher now, you might be able to help this guy out

You are not the center of the universe. You are not the only mentally ill person in the world. People go about trying to deal with those mentally ill issues in their own way. One of them is ghosting.

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>t. bootyblasted egotist
You guys' discords are probably all on a shit list somewhere so girls know not to waste their time with spergs who can't get 24/7 validation.

forgetting the incel relationship shit if someone doesnt respond to you for months its reasonable that they would explain why. in your example your friend even explained himself that he was in jail. but you think an explanation is too much to ask of someone? what brand of braindead are you?

Yeah, it was shortly after. She just ghosted me out of no where.

>but you think an explanation is too much to ask of someone?
Maybe I've dealt with so much abuse and neglect that I don't invest so heavily in relationships or people's opinions of me anymore, especially fleeting 3-month ones that were initiated with complete strangers online.

No you dont understand you are not owed anything and are pathetic for wanting to know what happened, duh.

You've suffered so much abuse that you've falsely correlated basic human interaction and curiosity with overbearing control gj

Ok here's a quick rundown of the two camps here and their versions of reality

>Version A
>girl doesn't talk to you for months out of nowhere
>demand where the FUCK this thot has been
>girl thinks you're a creep

>Version B
>say absolutely nothing
>OR say some cringe shit like "it doesnt matter where uve been im always here for you :))))"
>she thinks it's weird that you don't care what happened to her at best and loses all respect at worst

>Actual Reality
>"Yo, what happened?"
>then she says what happened

Autism man

>basic human interaction
No, you people definitely are just entitled spergs making up retarded shit to suit your strawman non-arguments.
>curiosity
Yeah, you guys are genuinely concerned about the well being of these people who ghost you, thats why you do nothing but talk shit on them after a few days of being ignored.

Wow look, someone with an IQ over 90

holy fucking cringe dude lol

Well shit nigga that sounds just like what I'm going through right now with a girl I added from Jow Forums. Currently at the stage where she says she's crying all the time and hates her life and tried to kill herself. She doesn't want to meet or voice chat because she's "shy" though.

>>Meet girl here in Jow Forums
stopped reading there. It will never work I don't know why you guys even bother.

As a girl on r9k, can confirm. I hate myself too much to ever get too close to people.

>girl
suuuurreeeeeeee

Same reason as why any other user on the board shouldn't be in a relationship or procreate, or something else?

Do you seriously not understand how depression works? You are fucking severely retarded. Holy shit.

My girl from Jow Forums killed herself a few years ago. Sometimes I think she just faked her death and joined the military. I dunno.

Okay did you ever think you should be grateful for the attention that you did get? No. Because like every other guy on here you are a selfish, entitled, spoiled, child. You just want more and more giving nothing in return like a black hole for attention.

This pretty much happened to me but I wasn't into her, though she was into me. I shut that down a couple times as it was awkward and we seemed to be great friends. She was cute, funny, easy to talk to, the bam. Gone.

Soft spoken girls who take a sudden interest in you soon after meeting them are a trap. Don't waste your time.

I guess kind of - severe anxiety, depression, paranoia, body dysmorphic disorder. I can't function in a normal human relationship, whether it's romantic or platonic, so I completely isolate myself, even online. Sometimes I do try to be friends with other girls though.