Running date tips

>be me, live close to a well known national Forrest with a unique land bridge
>Alot of trails
>Gym thot asks me to go hiking one day
>"Oh I just LOVE hiking user!"
>Let's do hoods branch! (Scenic trail with caves and etc)
>Didn't think anything about it being 6 miles
>Fuck user how much farther do we got
>I dunno it's a 6 mile trail
>Gym thot realizes she fucked up
>My version of hiking and hers are totally different
>Qt3.14 short shorts and tank top drenched in sweat
>Gasping for air
>Well I had fun gym thot, maybe we'll hit another one day
>"Yeah for sure!"
>Never heard from this bitch again

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As I've said on /out/, one man's easy hike may be one thot's death march hellpacolypse.

I made the error in college of taking a girl to the BWCA. When we'd portage, I would carry everything but her clothing, and I did 80%+ of the paddling, and did so at a pace I found bordering on slothful, and she was so tired by day 3 that she'd just randomly sob for an hour+ at a time. Killed every bit of interest I had in her.

She was an "experienced canoer" at day floats on a river and an "avid camper" at sights you can drive to with indoor toilets.

Sounds pretty awesome user. My cardio is pretty bad though and I'd be gassed as fuck after a 10 min mile.

I took my now wife ice skating on our second date... My lower legs were like giving out and I looked like a fucking retard and felt even worse. She just laughed at me and I made light of it.

TLDR: go for it even if you're slow

>ice skating
there is a big difference between skating and actually running around

try not to get a boner from the thought of chasing her into the woods to fall victim to the series of comical home alone type traps you left for her.

Everyone here is making fun of you OP cause they are fat lonely artists who only care about squat PRs.

I have never done this but I would assume it would be best to set a pretty easy pace, a 6 mph pace maybe, unless your trail running in which case ask you could just get her to set the pace and stare at the booty while you run. Basically fast enough to not be made fun of but easy enough to have still be able to talk while running. Godspeed user

Go for a run
Shower+sex
Go for a post workout meal, take her home +sex

Why are you even asking?

Your question is like asking how to go on a movie date. You’re so confusing.

No you dummie
It’s a great thing, make SURE you finish the run at HER house. Then maybe she’ll invite you in to shower with her

Jesus fucking Christ, user. When a woman says she “loves hiking” she means she wants to go out in her cute outdoorsy outfit and walk like two miles on a flat trail. This one is on you and your autism desu.

Make sure you can keep up dummy

Make sure to run slightly faster than her and always be like 5 feet ahead.
Keep looking back over your shoulder and act surprised then start running faster. She will like how athletic you are.

Playfully tease her about being way faster than her, if she’s got huge tits tell her she should be wearing just a sports bra and that she needs to let those things breathe. If there’s one thing titcows love, it’s having attention brought to their tits. Just keep it light and playful

>you need to let those things breathe
Please tell me you don't actually say that this to women.

Dennis Reynolds is that you?

He's gonna stay a virgin but at least he showed that thot, right?

Not just right off the bat but if you kinda know her and she’s being flirty and is into you there’s so much you can get away with. The same girl I’m talking about was over watching Netflix with me (before we even kissed) she wore a low cut tank so I just thought “what if I just stared at her tits” she was just giggling and saying “oh my god stop it” then I started thinking what if I just burried my face in them? Just don’t apologize for it. Double down and do it confidently

It's not about what you can get away with, it's about it being a terrible line. It sounds like something a creepy uncle would post on his nieces Facebook photos.

Nigger it doesn't matter what you say, it matters who says it and how. It's creepy because and old man to his nieces, it's not creepy when it's a 20-something couple who are about to fuck

Flexes 'cep
>you need to let those things breath

Yep... still got it

Keep spouting that line, I'm sure it's working well for you.

Exactly.

>get there in your cute little sweatbands
>do some quick toe touches and yell ALRIGHT 3 2 1 GO
>Sprint until you lose her
>text her later that day and tell her she doesn't really have what it takes

I mean you’re not wrong, it is a terrible line. But it worked. Girls like stupid cheesy shit that’s why some of them go their whole lives beliving in astrology, avoiding people born in certain months because virgos just don’t click with them

>gains goblin takes the form of thot
>it’s super effective

>Keep spouting that line, I'm sure it's working well for you
I'm not the one who said he uses that line but if you can't see the difference between a creepy uncle talking to his nieces and a guy talking to a girl he's fucking that's his age then you're a fucking idiot bro

You need to show her you're in better shape than she is. Sprint ahead of her and say "Heh, next time keep up", then run off.

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kek

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My dick shrinks when I run. What do?

Permanently? Stop running.

This literally happened to me years ago. Lesson learned the hard way.

Hiking comes with a lot of trial and error lessons. For example, I had to also learn the hard way to bring extra water/snacks for newbies who come along with me because they will always finish their water/snacks early. It's all like clockwork.

No, but if I was in that situation, my 4" flaccid would be a 2", and much harder to get up to 6.5"-7".

>expecting a college girl to be down to portage on a multiday hike

I sympathize with the general sentiment in this thread but this sounds like your own fault dude, very few people let alone young women can handle a trip like that

>she was so tired by day 3 that she'd just randomly sob for an hour+ at a time.

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Lmao wtf man. She will think he's lost his fucking mind and that he's trying to escape her.

Whatever you do, ABSOLUTELY DO NOT rape her behind some bushes and bash her skull with rock

Why you gotta single out virgos man?
Unless you’re one of us, then it’s cool.

My girl and I run together and then come home and have steamy sex and it feels way better. If a bitch asks you to run with her you do it. Where's your girlfriend at?

>this brainlet beta faggot doesn't want to dominate a girl in the field of running

How do I go on a movie date?

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Movie first, then dinner so you can talk to each other, then sex.

Make sure to demonstrate to her that you have good levels of endurance and can run faster than her. This is for two reasons. One: if you have good running endurance she'll see you have good sexual stamina. Two: by demonstrating that you're faster than her you're subtly showing her that if she turns down your sexual advances she won't be able to escape.

It seems weird to meet up with a girl then immediately sit through a whole movie without talking

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This sounds like a variation of the good old "implication" theory, but unironically.

please don't zhang fei post here

It is weird, movies aren't a good first date

I'm assuming you're talking to like a first or second date kind of thing. If you see the movie second, you'll want to talk afterwards but you won't be able to. I've never really been big on movie dates though desu, it's like something you do in middle school because you can't do anything else. Just go get drinks like a normal adult.

I did this once as my first date, we just rubbed hands during the whole movie
>tfw we went to see Skyfall

Nothing wrong with running date.
The things you need to think of are simple
1. Her distance
2. Her pace
3. Make the route enjoyable for both the senses and keeping 1-2 in mind

You're not trying to show off and outmatch her unless she brings it up a race. At which point beat her ass and show off.
Honestly the amount of people saying this is a bad idea is silly, they probably aren't runners.
Chicks like feeling included, even if they are holding you back the simple fact you're taking the time to do something together is important.
So don't listen to autistic people OP.

This a common occurrence. Anyone have the greentext of the guy who had to fish the girl out of a river, and still fucked her?

Bitch, I was dragging fatty little 13 year olds on 15 mile per day BWCA trips when I was a youth leader, and they all rose to the occasion. Even when girls would come with (not every year), they did fine.

This shouldn't have been a fitness challenge. I planned an easy paddle, budgeted 4 hours per day for fishing, recreation, and "light beer", planned to travel 6 miles per day, planned to break camp after 8 am and to make camp before 6 pm. I could have dragged a dead body along and kept that time table.

But she didn't eat enough because she apparently didn't believe me when I described the toilets during the planning, and then decided she wasn't going to poop, so she had no fuel; she forgot meds, and she had never used a sleeping pad that wasn't a car-camper air mattress, so she wasn't sleeping worth a shit, even when I gave up my pad so she could double up; while she wasn't fat, she apparently had the muscle tone of a tape worm, because even though I was carrying her bedding, all the common gear, all the food, my own personal gear and the canoe, she couldn't keep up carrying a pack which was just a towel, three bikinis, her makeup kit, 5 days clothing (probably 10 outfits), camp shoes, sleepwear, and rain gear. The pack was like 45 lbs, I was slinging 160 when we started and 150 when the food was all eaten. I am not 4 times her weight. She was also hyperparanoid about wildlife since I was hanging a bear bag.

If you can't take just your personal gear and match my pace when I've got 90% of my bodyweight on me, you aren't a functional adult. I am not some cardio monster pushing huge pace.

Yes, I shouldn't have assumed that her claimed experience would mean she was a capable outdoorswoman, but the run should have been greenhorn friendly.

hold on I need this greentext now. someone post it.

Post gf.

user here's the plan.
She suggested so she's pretty confident she can outrun you. Do not let this happen. You need to be setting a faster pace to tucker her out. If you finish the running more exhausted than her, congratulations you just downgraded yourself several tiers in her eyes.
Otherwise keep the conversation going, maintain some eye contact, don't be a sperg and have fun.

Don't forget to report back

seconding

Must be tired.
Damn near fell off my chair, and this isn't THAT funny.

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user did the right thing. Not every girl is worthy of having sex with you. You'll realize that when/if you finally get laid.
Or become a wizard. Whichever happens first, really.

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>Tell her if you catch her you're going to rape her.

Best run ever.

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>her makeup kit
The fact that she took makeup to a canoe trip... might as well have been a sign saying "Abandon All Hope, Ye Who Enter"

i swear on me nan that if i don't run under sub 1:17 for a half in november ill try to do something with my life
please god let me run a sub 1:17

Her pack was 45lbs (~20kg) and yours was 160 (~75kg)? For fucks sake, you should pack less. Total weight between you two should have been 35kg max + canoe.

That who episode is your fault, and you sound like an inconsiderate cunt.

number one rule is to run slow enough so that you're not both out of breath and can hold a conversation

number 2 : just bee yourself

going on a date with a fit attractive girl where you get to show off your physique and impress her with your athleticism, while also being able to have good converation (though not feeling awkward if theres a lapse cause your running) at the sane time as endorphines are being released so you both feel good is autism???

On a Cambodian cross stitch forum like this literally everything is autism.

You should hold her hand while running for bonus points.

Pick a fun trail and by trail I mean a real trail. If you live in flat land with no ascents and descents then you should just kill yourself. If you're really lucky and live in a straight up mountainous area going on an easy run with her ( 60-70% of your max HR) so that you two autists can actually talk. If she doesn't have trail shoes don't bother she isn't worth your time.

>Le epic trail runner
This board is for athletes, please leave.

definetly do this, even if she doesn't ask for it

I run both on the road and dirt. There's literally nothing wrong with trail running. This board is for larpers so I guess you're right at home. A nice trail would be perfect for a date.

Bro can you take me camping and canoeing I’ll carry the shit

I didn't dump her pack and inspect it, a 20 year old woman is supposed to be an adult, and I gave her a pack list.
More than half my load was canoe, I didn't have a lightweight canoe at the time, I only had a Discovery 175. I also don't ULfag approved cooking gear.

And yeah, it's my fault , that was the point of the anecdote. Am I inconsiderate? Failing to pack for or force feed an adult is not being inconsiderate. I didn't require her to do any of the labor, merely to be with and carry her personal gear, and I offered to cut the trip short when she started having problems.

>If you live in flat land with no ascents and descents then you should just kill yourself

Don't be so hard on the Dutch

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>makeup kit
>like 10 outfits
>3 bikinis
>no food
Sounds about right.

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>make-up kit
And it didn't raise an alarm in your head somehow ? Are you autistic ?

How many times did you fuck though?

Shitty movie

If you're talking about RRG / Natural Bridge then I think that cave is closed now :(

keked loudly at work

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HAHAHAH, that's literally what I use to find out if a girl is a keeper or not. If she is a pathetic slob that can't keep up with my bare minimum fitness then they are really not worth my time.

Trust me, you will save a lot of time this way.
Note this advice is for g.f and wife material. Fucking random got thots obviously has lower standards.

>make up kit
I hope you banged her you autist.

how big is that cock?

>she'd just randomly sob for an hour+ at a time
BAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA holy shit

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>being able to get an erection after a 10k run

OK, Superman.

Holy shit gibs pls

I'd be terrified of getting cardio-mogged

Why do you think you wouldn't be able to get hard after a run? I'm not even in good shape and I can.

Don't emberrass her too hard.
I had a running date once and this chick had to rest every 3 minutes because it was her first time running (not even a fatty).
I run all the time so it was a little bit awkward, but it was still ok.
Come up with some jokes in between rests if you dominate her.

I masturbate every time i come home from a 10k, 3 times a week

How to be friendzoned instantaneously. You can go running with your gf but when you are a running partner of some dumb whore you are trying to bed you don't let her have the workout buddy/ personal trainer asset until you are already fucking her

The fact this faggot uses words like rad is all you need

Don't do this for the love of god this is the worst advice I've seen on Jow Forums in a long time.
I know it's bait but OP might have autism.

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