Midnight existential dread thread

>care to explain how the love of another human being will help you mentally

yeah you're right dude, completely correct, unequivocally truthful

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We made some insane compression software that doesn't take a billion years to decompress and you can actually use it while compressed

wow, thats actually useful.

good luck, hope you make enough to go full rich-NEET.

That's what Im hoping to be able to do, but some of my investors are snake ass niggas and Im afraid of them fucking me over, I should be good but im a paranoid little shit

Lost my job weeks ago and feel myself spiraling down. I cant get out of bed and all I barely put any effort to finding a job anymore. Went out with some friends last weekend and got drunk. Just kept thinking of jumping off the balcony of his apartment. I just dont have it in me to keep going

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Fucking this, i had the same mindset before my first gf. It was so shit, misery and poison that it ruined me for a very long time.

Fucking work on yourself before putting yourself out there, it may take time but these people underage shits that think just because they havent had their dick sucked by 16 life is over.

Find out what the issue is, get help. If you cant get over it and its been to much trauma/trouble you cant do anything about. Then i can feel sorry for you but you can still have a life, that you can look back on and say even though life wasnt easy. I made a man of myself.

Instead become a trap, masturbate to cartoons and surround yourself with negative shit.

This user here is mostly correct.
>I don't suffer from actual or severe mental issues, but a gf would help alleviate the mild feelings of emptiness/loneliness.
No, It won't, at least not in the long term. The user you replied to was right up until he said it is possible to find someone who is the perfect match to fix you, though as he pointed out it is obviously very unlikely you would find such a person if they were to exist. Sadly, this person doesn't exist. No person will live up to your expectations and you will be always be disappointed eventually. Let go of this romantic attachment and realize that your fix can only come from within, as that is where the problem itself lies, not in any concrete external desires (as such desires do not actually exist).

To put it simply, no person will understand your experience better than yourself, for the distance between people is too great to claim otherwise. A girlfriend is a gamble for immediate and short-lived satisfaction.

I will share fears.
> I said to another person that I am afraid of not just death, dying and never being remembered. Dying and no one caring about who I was and what I did
> I fear rejection and failure
However I never lose hope. Do not lose that anons, that is the spirit of suicide. Hopelessness. Thinking that you should just accept defeat. That it is time to give up, lay down and die, and quit trying to make a difference in this world which you quite possibly could and it is one of the main reasons of which you are here. To change things. To leave your mark on the world making it better than when you entered it when you leave.

Its one job out of many to come. Get a grip, ask for people around for help. Dont drink anything more.

Wish you the best.

>being this much of a narcissist
Wasting your life in a vain pursuit of acknowledgement by others is pathetic. You are not here to change things and be remembered, you exist to be changed and with the old (You) forgotten completely in a single moment. Expecting anything less is foolish.

To relate it more clearly, how much of your own life do you even remember? How many particular days can you remember in relation to the rest? I bet far less than 1%. Even in those days you do happen to remember, your recollection is foggy at best, and you can only recall a fraction of that day's most memorable events. Now, take the closest person to you and imagine how much of this they happen to remember about you. I'd bet they remember a fraction of the fraction you remember about yourself. Considering all this, how can you expect others to remember you at all? This pursuit is nothing but vain flailing--the most false virtue, though I sincerely admit that the idea is beautiful in the most romantic sense.

> Buy motorcycle
>Get permit
>Ride motorcycle , feel like Chad
>Crash 3 weeks later , break collarbone
>Lose 1 job and can't work the other
>Ff 4 weeks no money left, half the bills due
>Feel like shit since I can't provide for my siblings and parents

Also a virgin with at 21 with because to beta to notice when a female is into me

The fuck is an insurance? Dont you get anything? or you fucked up?

I used to be like that but I realized I don't specifically want a gf, just someone to understand my autistic way of thinking.

>just someone to understand my autistic way of thinking.
will never happen.

this is my version of that image desu

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Crashed on my own taking a turn to quick and was left to fix the bike myself. So I fucked myself in many ways that day.

>tfw in love with a girl that probably doesn't even remember who the fuck i am
>tfw in love with a girl that is probably having fun with her bf in this exact moment while im here thinking about her

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>Been given multiple chances to make up a class I failed so I could graduate high school
>Would never do the work due to my extreme apathy and laziness/procrastination
>Given an additional summer school class that would let me graduate
>Still don't do the work
>Father has severed contact with me since then
>Live with my mother (parents are divorced)
>Work at a restaurant flipping burgers for $11.50 an hour
>Have absolutely nothing else lined up
>No gf, no friends, most of my family hates me/sees me as a failure
>Don't enjoy anything I used to
>Playing video games feels more like a chore
>The days seem to run together now
>Decided I'll let life do with me what it pleases because that's what worthless pieces of garbage like me deserves
>Secretly wish someone would help me but I'll never tell anyone how I feel
>All of this is my fault
>Is it normal to regret so many things while being so young?

Jesus christ, i wont pick on it. You have most probably beaten up yourself enough over this. First of all your parents should be able to help you for a bit during this harsh times.

But in general, no savings, lost job because of a stupid motorcycle.

life lesson learned i hope, dont buy this shit til you have enough savings for times like this.

>tfw nihilist (don't believe in cosmological meaning, but in individual personal meaning), atheist, and anti-natalist

I honestly like life, but am scare of growing old, having failing health, and eventually dieing and becoming non-existent. I wouldn't want be born or exist, if eventually I will die and my being, my memories, my knowledge will be gone. I wouldn't want this existential dread on anyone, which is why I won't have kids and became anti-natalist. Also, I feel sad that my life is ultimately meaningless, and that I can't do anything to improve the well being of humanity or the world. By existing, I'm consuming resources and having a CO2 footprint and ultimately harming the environment.

The only thing that comforts me is nihilism, which means I can't fail in life and gives me freedom. It does not matter if I become a billionaire or a drug addict.

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Yup , it's funny because at fist all I cared about was my motorcycle, but know i just want to get back on my feet and help my family. My dad struggles with alcoholism and drug use and recently relapsed after a year of no booze or drugs so he doesn't really hold a job down for more than a week or two. But I'm almost fully recovered and ready to go back to work.

>I feel sad... that I can't do anything to improve the well being of humanity or the world
Except you can user, and definitely in small ways. For example you say you feel bad that you consume resources and leave a carbon footprint, a simple step to take from here is to plant a tree or even just plant a few flower seeds. By doing this you help to negate your carbon footprint, and possibly make your community a better place in the process. You're free to take this kind of thing as far as you want possibly even having a net negative carbon footprint eventually. Improving the whole of humanity or society is a titanic task, so it's advisable to start with small manageable things like what I mentioned above. I'm a nihilist/antinatalist too, but these small goals really are achievable, if you truly care about these things then don't give up on them.

Good luck user, im hoping everything will be sorted out and your back on feet.

I too, feel the fear of never being remembered. Just being forgotten so quickly. No one forgets who da vinci was. But everyone forgot about that one peasant who died of bubonic plague. That's my real fear.

I thought about doing my best at becoming a money making machine and then donating my wealth towards the end of life like Andrew Carnegie or Bill Gates. But, charity doesn't ultimately doesn't solve poverty since with more resources, the population will increase, which means less resources per person and poverty again. Poverty and people suffering genuinely makes me sad. People might think I'm a misanthrope for being antinatalist, but I genuinely don't like people suffering and thus we shouldn't carelessly breed.

You are so dependant on another human that it doesn't surprise me you don't have a gf. You're a nobody without a gf and that's why girls are not interested in you

personally not huge on >gf but idk, the existential emptiness of having no inherent purpose or metric of value makes a significantly meaningful connection to other similar beings attractive as a way to create a viable ordered self-referencing network of meaning that it might make my subjective phenomenal existence something in which i'd develop emotions of experiencing value rather than end myself
but i doubt there are many girls good enough to actually make the ride better rather than worse and there are significant alternatives

on the cusp of life
the next year will determine my future
it's not looking good.

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