Come and sit down

I'm glad to hear that, happiness is the absence of striving for happines, right?

Thank you, im feeling done with this in general. Yes the brain tricks you into that all the time. Shit day at work, you know there is 0.7 L vodka at home so you can pass out on the floor chugging it to numb yourself from some painful memories or to never really feel loved.

It feels weirdly comforting that somebody knows the same pain as I do, although i wouldnt wish anyone to go through this

Got booze through a friend and was invited to my first party. when i was 14. It was the first time in my life i had confidence. Lifted me up. I loved the feeling so much. Never come down from that feeling.

I was with the outsiders at school, We never did anything bad, just wanted alcohol. To forget how we didnt fit in anywhere. it wasn an escape.

my first gf that i didnt even sleep with dumped me on new years eve when i was gonna turn 18. After that its been a slooooow spiral down the path. But as the alcoholic in me reacts, feel bad drink, feel good drink, everything revolves around alcohol

I understand, its a weird curse upon us, its good to have something to escape this world, either we feel good or bad, but its not right that we crave SO MUCH something that kills us drink by drink, the worst part is that i dont even care if this kills me anymore

Ive always been that shy guy, changed schools a couple of times when i was a kid. bullying and so on. I never fit in. nervous all the time.

I feel i dont have an identity except alcohol anymore, since the mindset is. what days can i drink, is the homemade wine ready soon?

sick

Homemade wine?

At first i used alcohol to overcome social anxiety while meeting people, since then it has became an answer to everything

Its mostly excuses to drink. i can understand people with total shit youth, abused by parents.

I just felt a connection with alcohol that i will never have again. I have to face this world sober. thats scaring me

I hate the fact that ive had bad examples in front of my eyes my whole childhood and teen years, yet im still becoming the person i swore to myself that i wouldnt ever become

Yeah it opens you up, not that quiet person or that didnt want to stand out. But when i moved out so i could drink alone. Like it was a adult thing. fuck everything. Then it hits you. Going outside became a struggle, sweats, nightmares...

>Hey want to come outside with me and my friends?

Sure, just let me drink a bottle of rum beforehand so i dont get panic attack when i get there

Thats sad. do you have your own family? or contact with your family today?

>Thats sad. do you have your own family? or contact with your family today?

I still live with my parents, im 19, starting my first job in two weeks, father is still an alcoholic but works abroad so it doesnt affect me as much as it used to, and mum has gotten so much better, but still, from my childhood i have so much fucking screwed memories of taking care of my drunk father, that would mess anyone, im sure about that

Haha i recognise that. When normies at work tried getting me out. invited to preparty but that preparty started at my place as soon as i woke up that day.

Kept my distance but everyone could see the tomato face at work. The shame, the guilt...

Oh i see, I hope you can fix your drinking and dont lose your job.

The tomato face is fucking worst of all, you cannot hide that, and the worst part? there is always some fucking normie that say
> Why are you so red
>Look at him how red he is lmao
Just leave me the fuck alone, cmon

it must be a sad view to see those who you trust and should feel secure with, rambling around like that, No child should witness drunken debauchery, especially when their personalities change with the alcohol

Thanks for caring user, You are the first that has ever cared in years. i will do mi best to keep my job and move as i become financially stable

It definitely is, most of my early childhood memories are taking care of my drunk father, answering to police when they brought him home, taking him home from pub when he couldnt even walk, finding him laying on the ground in my city randomly, getting abused, sometimes when he came home drunk he swore he would kill me because of my bad grades in school (guess why huh)
Everytime now when i heard some random noise at home my heartbeat increase so much because i got flashbacks of my dad abusing my mother and sister and destroying random stuff around our flat, there is no way out

lol yeah, its like they can see right through you but dont say anything. Thousand knives in the back.

I should have seeked treatment long time ago, but i never been more ready to say goodbye to our friend alcohol.

I do really care. You are young. Seek help before it just ruins your body and soul more. You are worth it.

Thats awful, parents are not understanding how it affects the child to see and hear such things. Right now some child out there is experiencing the same thing and it breaks my heart a bit. Circle of alcoholism.

Whiskey works wonder for me. Beer tastes like bitter shit. Better with some sweet cocktails, strong alcohol does wonders to your mood.

If you have never been more ready i think that now its the time to say goodbye to this demon, i wish you the best, godspeed.

It does, Enjoy your whiskey friend

Unfortunately we had a bad relationship and if i want to be healthy its this time or never. I hope you will find the strenght to beat him to one day,

wish you to the best my friend.

Same to you, I hope that in few years we all can look back and be proud that we've done it
Thank you.