>have terrible social skills >never passed an interview in my life >interviewed for my "dream job" recently (good pay, and very interesting work) >don't hear anything a week later >job is reposted on job boards feels bad man
>tfw if i wasn't autistic i might have gotten the job story of my life, career, relationships, etc.
how do i get better? >say umm a lot >frequently need to think about my response to make sure it's good enough >when thinking, i break eye contact and look down >can't even handle smalltalk or hold a conversation for more than 30 seconds
me trying to have small talk: >me: how was your summer >them: it was good, but went by quick though >me: y-yeah
>me: what are you up to this weekend >them: might have a BBQ, but it looks like it might rain >me: y-yeah help Jow Forums. i have no social skills that i spend all my free time alone, and have a few solitary hobbies (like lifting)
there are videos on youtube that teach you how to keep a conversation going. do some research
Logan Hernandez
fake it til u make it brother pretend to be confident til u actually are i guess. if u suck at small talk just always ask more questions and listen to their responses, remember that everyone loves to talk about themselves idk.
practice in the mirror if u suck at talking
Robert Morris
tfw no irene gf
Asher Roberts
You're either innately good at this or not, but as someone who is good at it I believe as with anything else you can improve drastically by practice, akin to how a total skeletor who started benching sub bar weight in time actually might be strong compared others.
1. Do break off eye contact, just not for too long or at the "wrong" time. Too much eye contact is percieved as psychologically aggressive, while too little is seen as timid and/or autistical. There's a balance.
Talk about yourself (but preferably not too much, it's an invitation for the other person to drop some personal information which you can then follow up on, i.e engage them socially and maybe even find some similarities), humblebrag a little, say shit that is in fact completely fucking obvious and dumb as hell but say it anyway; 90% of the time unless you're interviewing for very specific positions it's not important exactly what you say, but how you say it and all the body language & cues that follow with it.
Jordan Lewis
me; what are you up to this weekend them: my parents are visiting me: oh...
have any examples? i've seen some videos, but they haven't helped tbqh
thanks though most of the time, i don't know what to even say and what questions to ask don't want to be too inquisitive into someone's personal life, or ask a question that might be considered weird or creepy
if you're confident even if it's based on absolutely nothing, people will think you're confident and act & treat you accordingly, which in turn actually makes you confident. the reality of social situations is very often created from your own mind
just go too far into the delusions and become an asshole
Zachary Collins
thanks
>Talk about yourself the problem is, there is nothing to talk about >spend all my time at home in front of a computer >no friends, so i'm always alone >hate my life
>tfw coworkers can talk about their exercise routines endlessly >how intense it is, the specifics of their routine, what time they go to the gym, their diet, what exercises they hate doing or are having trouble with, etc. >me: i just do a split and drink protein shakes
>the reality of social situations is very often created from your own mind i've heard this too. how what you feel will be communicated through your actions and words. so if you feel nervous or like you're a creepy weirdo, that's how it will come off
just hard to implement in real life tbqh. i always feel like shit
The secret to holding a comversation is to be interested in What the other person has to say. People love to tall about themselves
Carter Price
Sorry about the job but the good news is if you survive long enough you'll get so tired being forgotten and outcast you'll get mad enough at the world to take control of your life and have some interesting stuff to talk about with the social skills you gained whole doing it
Ayden Brooks
How fluid is your internal monologue? I think some people are just naturally more skilled with language, but you should just practice by having more conversations with people. Try Tinder it's literally no risk all reward.
John Hughes
i watch this webm every day when i wake up
Matthew Green
I used to be like you. Now, whenever I have to to something social intensive, I pretend i am someone else.
I always pay attention to how people talk, how they keep the conversation going, and their quirks.
I slightly imitate them, I talked about what they are interested and follow. People can still recognize I'm autistic but there's way less awkwardness.
A quick trick to keep conversations going is to add more details. In yojr bbq example, you could ask how many people where there, how was the meat, or if you are feeling adventurous, you could talk/make up a story about when you go BBQ.
Brayden Gomez
like toastmasters? been to a few meetings actually
most of the time, i can't think of an appropriate question to ask, like >them: i visited my parents this weekend >me: do you visit them often? seems like an odd question to me. they'll say yes/no and the conversation ends
i've actually overheard someone else say they visited their parents. the person they were talking to responded with "oh, that's nice" in a somewhat genuine/excited manner. and then they changed subjects
You don't have to relate to the topic. I find it actually sometimes easier to talk when you don't relate, as you can ask questions. I was chatting with a girl who went hiking during labour day (I spent mine coding, going to the gym, and playing vidya like a fag). When she talked about hiking, I asked about whether she found it tiring, then about what was her favourite sights in there, and then I got a bit personal, asking her why she liked hiking.
She seemed ok, and eventually she kept talking ans talking while I just laughed and nodded.
Carson Martin
Also if you're over 20 you're past redemption and can't be saved.
Fuck you op You'll always be that one azn guy from Toronto who is blogging his shit on fit. As usual I'm going to report you.
Evan Robinson
she's cute
Jacob Morris
Take phenibut a few hours before an interview, that shit makes me rattle like a madman even when I'm normally really shy and awkward in conversations with strangers.
Xavier Howard
Stop asking questions if you don't care about the answer or have nothing to say. You're not a talker so just enjoy the silence. If they're not comfortable with it, let them be the ones to squirm and struggle.
Interviews are just conversations, what they really want to know is is this person likable and will they fit it. Just relax, be confident and be yourself
Owen Wilson
Maybe stop posting these autistic Webms of women that wouldn't even glance at your subhuman incel face. Melvins like you make me sick
