Hi! Tell me about your day if you'd like to. Sorry I woke up late today

Pretty shit. Did nothing but stay in bed and shitpost all day, though I'm feeling better than yesterday.
Being sick sucks even if it's just a simple flu.

Went to work, felt nauseous all morning and also incredibly depressed all day, came home, started drinking/doing drugs again, feeling a bit better now but will still wanna die when I think about working another day.

It's a shame booze takes so long to fucking kill you.

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>open up Jow Forums
>see a bunch of threads about "first day of class"
>realize I missed the semester again
Looks like I'm still a NEET and will probably die as one.

I spend the morning with my waifu but i need to work harder so she can be proud of me.

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Being mean doesn't make me feel good, but helping people does. That's not being so nice, that's how everyone is.
>Dreamt I was taking care of a dark haired girl, I brought her some tea and she hugged me telling me not to leave her. And then I woke up.
>I have a girlfriend. Don't know how to feel about this.
Lessons can be taken from dreams but don't feel guilty for having them. Maybe you can come to some interesting realization through pondering your dream.
Figured. It was trash during. I just tuned in as soon as he had won to check up on the board.
Sorry you have the flu. Are you an Ausfag or something? It isn't flu season around where I live. I hope you feel better, glad you're recovering.
>Went to work, felt nauseous all morning and also incredibly depressed all day, came home, started drinking/doing drugs again
Sorry you had a tough day. Don't load all your happiness onto drugs. It's easy but not fulfilling. Sorry you hate working so much.
>It's a shame booze takes so long to fucking kill you.
Definitely because too few people realize it does when they start drinking.
Oh yeah this would be the week a lot of schools start. I guess summerfagging is over now when they start to get homework. That's gonna make the site better for a while at least. I'm a NEET too, just how things are sometimes I guess. You don't have to die as one, that's a choice you're making. Is it too late fore you to register? Did you even want to?
>I spend the morning with my waifu
Nice. Make her proud user! How else are you raise upstanding 2.5d children?

>Are you an Ausfag or something? It isn't flu season around where I live.
Not an Ausfag, which makes it extra odd. Just got really sick all of a sudden yesterday.

i woke up at 2
made chili con carne
didn't get a job so i should be looking for a new one but instead i've been smoking weed, taking pills, trolling around, just kicking the shit
my mom called me on my phone this morning but i passed out in the middle of the conversation lmao

>How bad of a mental breakdown was it?
It was just me going on a 3 hour long ramble about how much of a failure I am in her direction.

Samefag from last night who talked about girl not talking to me. She's still not talking to me and it's kinda getting to me at this point. Cant really play gaems or watch videos to distract myself when my heart is always reminding me of the lack of contact. Feels bad.

>Is it too late fore you to register?
I think so.
>Did you even want to?
I hate the idea of college, but the idea of a job sounds good. Make money, do something mind numbing, all that.

Im sorry I didn't want to be mean, just I was curious

That's weird. I hope it isn't something serious. Troubles like vomiting and fever are worrisome. I hope you're ok. If you aren't better in a few days talk to the doctor, please.
>made chili con carne
Nice. Chili is tasty.
>didn't get a job so i should be looking for a new one but instead i've been smoking weed, taking pills, trolling around, just kicking the shit
Don't act a way you'll regret later. Be careful with weed and pills, they can cause you problems if you abuse them.
>my mom called me on my phone this morning but i passed out in the middle of the conversation lmao
Call her back please. She's probably worried about you if you didn't say goodbye to her. Just call her to say you're alright if nothing else. Moms shouldn't have to worry about their kids over nothing.
>It was just me going on a 3 hour long ramble about how much of a failure I am in her direction.
Sorry. I imagine you regret doing that. I never say things like that to my parents because I don't want them to really hate me or kick me out. At least you got that off your chest.
>She's still not talking to me and it's kinda getting to me at this point.
Don't be sad for her sake. If she isn't talking to you she's either having a problem in life or is a person not worth thinking about. It's easier said that done but try to be mindful that she really doesn't matter that much. Try to find a different girl to get your mind off this one in a few days if you need to.
>I hate the idea of college, but the idea of a job sounds good. Make money, do something mind numbing, all that.
Well sorry you can't put yourself on that path just yet. Hopefully you get what you want soon man, no one deserves to be unhappy.
>Im sorry I didn't want to be mean, just I was curious
If you were the person asking a question I didn't take any offense to it. I just got a little flustered because I don't think of other people referring to me that way.

>Nice. Chili is tasty.
it's fucking bomb, i love to cook
>Don't act a way you'll regret later. Be careful with weed and pills, they can cause you problems if you abuse them.
you're trying to teach an old dog new tricks. i appreciate the honesty but i need a change of circumstances
>Call her back please. She's probably worried about you if you didn't say goodbye to her. Just call her to say you're alright if nothing else. Moms shouldn't have to worry about their kids over nothing.
don't worry about it, i shot her a message and told her i was sorry i passed out during. told her i was hella sleepy still and she caught me off guard. we talked a little about me going to uni again

I'm replying to the stuff from yesterday. today was ok I guess I made some internet friends. I don't do much on week days.
>I can't take care of myself as is. I'm the opposite of prudent according to my definition.
you are with others though.
>I'd want blackouts and that probably wouldn't work. I'll just be a vampire when they let me sleep when I please.
maybe you can still get something at least. I hope you can get nice rest either way.
>I dissociated so hard on haldol and zyprexa and I stopped violently and impulsively hurting myself when I got off them. I bit a chunk out of my arm then and now I can barely manage to put a match out on myself now.
I'm sorry that's terrible. I never had something that hard but still not the best thing but it helps with crying less. I had some weird experiences though.
>Heh. Imagine a woman going on a board that hates women. The absolute mad(wo)man.
I'm here since years it's just the only place to talk with boys. I guess you get uses to it after a while.
>No they can be. Especially around going to bed.
oh that sucks. they shouldn't be like that anymore I can get why that's annoying. I don't get why you are an adult.

Don't worry too much about it. Fever's much better than it was yesterday and luckily there was no vomiting involved, that would've been messy.
Just a very stuffed nose and sore throat so I can barely speak.

>At least you got that off your chest.
It's not the first time I did that. I've had the same concerns in my life for the last year or so and I'm not handling it well

>She's still not talking to me and it's kinda getting to me at this point.
Welp. Guess I'm off women for another 6 month period.

I'm an autist and meant to quote
>Don't be sad for her sake. If she isn't talking to you she's either having a problem in life or is a person not worth thinking about. It's easier said that done but try to be mindful that she really doesn't matter that much. Try to find a different girl to get your mind off this one in a few days if you need to.

>i love to cook
Cool! Cooking is awesome.
>you're trying to teach an old dog new tricks
I'm just worried you're hurting yourself. Take good care of yourself please.
>i shot her a message and told her
Ok good. Glad you didn't leave her hanging. Are you actually going back to uni? Good luck in your classes if you are.
>today was ok I guess I made some internet friends
Cool. I hope your internet friends are cool and long term. Friends are pretty cool.
>I don't do much on week days.
Same I maybe go for a walk with my grandpa on Wednesdays and that's it.
>you are with others though
I have no discipline and don't do things even if I know they're good for me. Smart people don't end up NEET leeches.
>I hope you can get nice rest either way.
I sleep just fine, thanks. I cover my face with a blanket. It's just day time when the room is too well lit.
>I'm sorry that's terrible
Don't be sorry for me doing something. I did it to myself, and deserve no pity. I was just giving an example and explaining why I don't trust meds.
>I had some weird experiences though.
Hope they weren't too bad for you. Worst drugs other than antipsychs ever gave me was brain zaps and those weren't too bad.
>I guess you get uses to it after a while.
Yeah I guess so. I just wouldn't be able to stand that much negative reception. I think at this point the board's unofficial purpose is to contain ronery threads and all this incel stuff is just a weird deviation of it. As long as people aren't being obnoxious I don't really care who they are.
> I don't get why you are an adult.
I don't act like one so I don't care that much about not being treated like one. It still hurts my pride.

>Are you actually going back to uni? Good luck in your classes if you are.
yeah, better late than never. i think i have taken the /b/ mentality too far IRL, should have made some moves when i was younger but there's no point in weeping now, i regret nothing

Went to the swimming club with my friends.After 2 hours we went to see Meg at the cinema and I ate a salad.Good day for me

Okey! I'm glad you aren't too ill. Sickness sucks regardless but I'm glad your long term health isn't at risk. Hopefully you get better and back to what you want to be doing.
>I've had the same concerns in my life for the last year or so and I'm not handling it well
Sorry you've been feeling so bad. Being a loser sucks but crying over it is the worst thing to do. Change or accept, you're destroying yourself from the inside out otherwise. Beating yourself up makes you your worst enemy and you don't want someone like that around you all the time. I hope you can recover from those feels.
Whatever you do regarding women just remember it has nothing to do with you. You dodged a bullet by not getting involved with someone who feels justified in ghosting people. Associating with that kind of person isn't worth the drama they'll inevitable make. Pretty faces are too often a veneer for a rotten soul. It's no big deal, I don't nitpick over misquotes and stuff like that. I understood what you meant, don't worry.
>yeah, better late than never
Good job. Best of luck to you. I hope the paths you want are still open for you.
>there's no point in weeping now
Good way to look at it.
>Went to the swimming club with my friends.After 2 hours we went to see Meg at the cinema and I ate a salad.Good day for me
Nice! I'm glad you had a nice day with some friends. Who's Meg to you? Gf or friend or what? Glad you had such a good day. Hope many more come your way.

>Hopefully you get better and back to what you want to be doing.
Thank you! I have some gunpla and waifubait kits that should be ready to ship over soon, so that'll keep me occupied for a while.

Thank you so much , Meg or The Meg is the name of the movie , sorry that I wasn't more specific.

maybe just the stress of going back to college and being so close to finishing it is really fucking with me. reminds me how i wasted my youth

Welp she just messaged me telling me to download instagram. Man I'm too old for this shit.

That's really cool. I hope you enjoy them when they come and it raises your spirits.
>Meg or The Meg is the name of the movie
I had to lay down for a few minutes because I felt really stupid after reading this. Sorry I didn't know that, I should have.
>maybe just the stress of going back to college and being so close to finishing it is really fucking with me. reminds me how i wasted my youth
I understand how you feel to some degree. Wasting the time of your life when you have the greatest potential for greatness is hard. The quicker you do something about it the less youth you end up wasting though. Youth becomes a bigger and bigger number as you get older. Sorry not finishing college is fucking with you so much. A degree doesn't mean that much, most people who get through college come out stupid. Employment is nice though, only reason to pursue an education in the internet age.
>Welp she just messaged me telling me to download instagram. Man I'm too old for this shit.
Weird. I guess it's good she didn't leave you hanging after all. Instagram seems very vain to me.

Nothing that interesting or of note. Woke up at 2pm, had lunch, watched youtube until evening, had dinner. It's now 1am, I'm drinking and browsing Jow Forums.
Yesterday I watched the first Gundam 79 recap film.

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>Cool. I hope your internet friends are cool and long term. Friends are pretty cool.
I hope so too so let's see how it goes. I couldn't be without at least one person to talk to sometimes.
>Same I maybe go for a walk with my grandpa on Wednesdays and that's it.
I do even less than that maybe grocery shopping at best.
>I have no discipline and don't do things even if I know they're good for me. Smart people don't end up NEET leeches
kinda same for me like I have some discepline but don't really do stuff for myself I'm like trying to find people who really care and want me to do those things.
>I sleep just fine, thanks. I cover my face with a blanket. It's just day time when the room is too well lit.
oki that's good. I sleep easily too but I have blind built in that are always down.
>Don't be sorry for me doing something. I did it to myself, and deserve no pity. I was just giving an example and explaining why I don't trust meds.
yes but it's still sad and something that makes me get feels. also lose a bit trust in meds I think.
>Hope they weren't too bad for you. Worst drugs other than antipsychs ever gave me was brain zaps and those weren't too bad.
antidepressants were worse than antipsychs to me. antipsychs just like mellow me out.
>Yeah I guess so. I just wouldn't be able to stand that much negative reception
it's been like this all my life and there are some nice people here at least like like-minded people.
>I don't act like one so I don't care that much about not being treated like one. It still hurts my pride
either way they shouldn't do it in the first place especially when it hurts you.

>Wasting the time of your life when you have the greatest potential for greatness is hard
i'll never forgive myself for it.
on the bright side i just got a new computer and that's pretty cool

College I was planning on applying to started today, maybe I'll apply next semester
Still don't have a learners permit, a job, or any aspirations
Persona 3 is pretty good though

Works shit as usual. I have 2 and a half hours of time a day where I can do what I want, but i'm to tired to. So it's just posting here and hoping I die and get to see my waifu.

why didn't you apply? don't they take applications a year in advance?
and are you me from high school?

Was flip flopping hard between majors then missed deadlines, then I graduated and said fuck it

i know that feel. did the same thing and settled for a bad decision

I jusdt took a bunch of painkillers because of a fucking cracked tooth. I can barely feel it now, feels good.

>Nothing that interesting or of note
That's perfectly fine. I don't come to Jow Forums and assume people lead super busy lives.
>Woke up at 2pm, had lunch, watched youtube until evening, had dinner. It's now 1am, I'm drinking and browsing Jow Forums.
That's a pretty normal day I suppose. Be careful when you drink please though.
>Yesterday I watched the first Gundam 79 recap film
Cool. I haven't seen it but I probably ought to.
>I have some discepline but don't really do stuff for myself I'm like trying to find people who really care and want me to do those things.
Yeah I'm incapable to doing things for myself, there's just nothing I really want to do. I only get out of bed to appease parents.
>I sleep easily too
That's good.
>yes but it's still sad and something that makes me get feels
Please don't pity me, it's not worth your time to feel for my sake.
>antipsychs just like mellow me out
Yeah it did the same for me most of the time and I was scared I felt that way so I tried to injure myself to get some sort of energy because the meds were starting to mind control me.
>there are some nice people here at least like like-minded people
Yeah I guess I just wouldn't be able to do it myself if I was in your situation I think.
>either way they shouldn't do it in the first place especially when it hurts you
It's okay if something hurts me. I just don't want to mess with other people. I'm gonna be sad no matter what so if other people can hurt me in some way to make themselves happier then I feel alright.

>i'll never forgive myself for it
You'll have to or you're going to waste your life over a few years of doing something stupid.
>on the bright side i just got a new computer and that's pretty cool
That's awesome. Is it a super fancy one or on the cheaper end?
>College I was planning on applying to started today, maybe I'll apply next semester
Sorry you missed it, hope you can do it next semester and start working on what you want. Indecision can stop you from doing a lot of cool things.
>Still don't have a learners permit, a job, or any aspirations
Same. I think my learner's permit expired. It feels weird to look back on myself when I did have aspirations and how they all just left with time.
>Persona 3 is pretty good though
I need to go through Persona games. Glad you're enjoying it.
>Works shit as usual. I have 2 and a half hours of time a day where I can do what I want, but i'm to tired to.
Sorry, supporting yourself with every ounce of energy has to suck. I hope being on here isn't too awful and you feel ok.
>it's just posting here and hoping I die and get to see my waifu
Sorry you feel so miserable. I hope you start to feel better.
Tooth problems suck, I'm sorry. At least the pain killers are helping you out. I hope you get some work done on your teeth so they get fixed.

>Yeah I'm incapable to doing things for myself, there's just nothing I really want to do. I only get out of bed to appease parents
I lay in my bed most of the day but I guess that's ok as long I do a thing or two for the household per day and do some things on the weekend.
>Please don't pity me, it's not worth your time to feel for my sake
I'm not trying to pity you I just feel with you a bit. I'm a sensetive person.
>Yeah it did the same for me most of the time and I was scared I felt that way so I tried to injure myself to get some sort of energy because the meds were starting to mind control me
I kinda just let it happen it doesn't seem too bad and I can be somewhat happy with things. it doesn't feel like going in bad direction either just like becoming more normal and simpler in some ways.
>Yeah I guess I just wouldn't be able to do it myself if I was in your situation I think
makes sense but literally where do you find people as an awkward autist.
>It's okay if something hurts me. I just don't want to mess with other people. I'm gonna be sad no matter what so if other people can hurt me in some way to make themselves happier then I feel alright
I wish you wouldn't think like that and give yourself some importance but it's really difficult most of the times.

>Be careful when you drink please though
I only really drink beer now, it's easier to pace myself. I poisoned myself with vodka a couple of years ago, and I'm not really eager to go through that experience again. Thank you for your concern.
>Cool. I haven't seen it but I probably ought to.
I tried to watch the '79 TV series 3 or 4 years ago, but I dropped it after a short while. I do still want to get into UC Gundam though, so I decided to watch the recap movies instead. The first movie was great, if a little fat paced. Holds up really well after almost 40 years.

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I'm a bit of a retard, blox

>you're going to waste your life over a few years of doing something stupid.
the desire to not waste my life anymore keeps me going
>That's awesome. Is it a super fancy one or on the cheaper end?
it's midrange. does what i want it to but i'm a whore for computers so it bothers me when something else is stronger than my current rig

i'm just pacing around in my room being a maniac again, whatchu doing right now?

The movies are great if you just want the overall story, though the TV show includes more character development moments. Might want to watch it later to get a bit more insight.

Oh it's alright , don't blame yourself too much on this,it's just a thread ^w^

I want to hug you, OP.

Not because I want to comfort you, but because I know you would hug back which would comfort me.

careful. OP said he doesn't like showering a few threads ago.

>spend the day working
>come home
>fap to 2D
>browse the chan
>rn deciding what anime to watch while getting drunk
>suicidal thoughts are back again
nice. how was your day OP?

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>I guess that's ok as long I do a thing or two for the household per day and do some things on the weekend
Yeah I just don't like phones much so if I lay in bed all day they get worried I'm catatonic.
>I just feel with you a bit
Don't worry about it I'm ok. Being too sensitive is a bad thing from my experience.
>it doesn't feel like going in bad direction either just like becoming more normal and simpler in some ways
I hate that idea. If the only way for me not to kill myself is by having an altered state on consciousness than I should jump off the nearest building.
>makes sense but literally where do you find people as an awkward autist
I do the same thing there are just plenty of other sites that are more female friendly so it surprises me that you go here.
>give yourself some importance
I fail to see why. Everybody I know and interact with is better than me objectively.
I'm glad you pace yourself at least partially responsibly. Alcohol poisoning sucks. I'll put '79 Gundam on recommends list. it's no problem don't worry.
>the desire to not waste my life anymore keeps me going
That's good. I'm glad. Keep that attitude up and you'll get there.
>it's midrange. does what i want it to
I think that's the best to go with.
>i'm just pacing around in my room being a maniac again, whatchu doing right now?
Nothing really. I spend like 1/3 time writing these posts 1/3 watching something 1/3 nothing when I'm awake.

>That's good. I'm glad. Keep that attitude up and you'll get there.
i'm very short sighted in my goals though. almost all of them are 3 years down the line except a couple unrealistic ones
>I think that's the best to go with.
i kind of regret not dropping an extra $100 on it for a better graphics card
>Nothing really. I spend like 1/3 time writing these posts 1/3 watching something 1/3 nothing when I'm awake.
life's a daze, isn't it?

Some fun video games, including MGSV: The Phantom Pain. Been looking forward to tonight's episode of Better Call Saul with vodka. Thinking about how difficult it is to talk to anyone and how I'd like to lose my online identity, wipe it and just start over, with nobody knowing me.

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Yeah I know it's stupid to care that much. I'm just too self-conscious unfortunately. I care immensely about things that happen even though nothing I do ever actually matters.
I can't hug you over a screen. I would if I could though. is correct, normally about once a week or two and it's been a week.
>the chan
ree
>spend the day working
>come home
>fap to 2D
Sounds like your day was ok for this part if you enjoy work at all.
>rn deciding what anime to watch while getting drunk
>suicidal thoughts are back again
Sorry. Wish you didn't feel so bad. Alcoholism is bad, mkay. I hope you enjoy whatever anime you end up watching.
>nice. how was your day OP?
I woke up a few hours ago. Haven't done very much. Dad got angry and unplugged router but I got him to give it back in a few minutes. Woke up in the same bad mood from Sunday.

>47640240
>Yeah I know it's stupid to care that much. I'm just too self-conscious unfortunately. I care immensely about things that happen even though nothing I do ever actually matters.
It's okay man , I know exactly how you feel like , I'm self-aware too but it happend to me on a lot of occasions that I overthink pointless things without any use.And hey, if it helps your mood , the fact that you answered to my 1st reply in this thread makes me really happy,I rarely get replies so thanks for that :D

>Yeah I just don't like phones much so if I lay in bed all day they get worried I'm catatonic.
same but my dad calls me often. I can just say hi to my mom when she comes from work so she knows I'm still there.
>Don't worry about it I'm ok. Being too sensitive is a bad thing from my experience.
that's good and yes it usually is but there is nothing I can do about it. I might get hurt over and over again but I still want human contact.
>I hate that idea. If the only way for me not to kill myself is by having an altered state on consciousness than I should jump off the nearest building.
for me it's less about not killing myself. I just used to get really bad phases with lots of crying and psychotic stuff sometimes so that's getting better and I have some kind of direction for my life now.
>I do the same thing there are just plenty of other sites that are more female friendly so it surprises me that you go here.
I don't know any other sites to meet people besides Jow Forums and this is one of the boards I know at least. you also gotta find the right threads like here no on minds me.
>I fail to see why. Everybody I know and interact with is better than me objectively
even if you see them as better don't you think you deserve some importance too? I think you do.
well it's late already so I need to sleep again so goodnight
see you tomorrow

i just came from a short trip, everything seemed fine but then i suddenly started to feel kinda sad and lonely. I guess i had a good time during the weekend and now is over. Besides a friend told me while i was out that he tried to kill himself, i still don't know if he did it or not.

>i'm very short sighted in my goals though
Just having goals is good.
>i kind of regret not dropping an extra $100 on it for a better graphics card
Graphics cards can be replaced. Worst case scenario you waste a few hundred on the one you have now. It's no big deal.
>Some fun video games, including MGSV:
Nice. I love MGSV. So few stealth games come out that any of quality are awesome in my eyes. Ending doesn't exist but there are parts of the story that are really good and fun gameplay.
>Thinking about how difficult it is to talk to anyone and how I'd like to lose my online identity, wipe it and just start over, with nobody knowing me.
I don't have too much of an online identity which is nice. Nothing is stopping you though, just make new accounts for everything and start again. Too many people online for others to miss you and recognize you on a different name in most situations.
>I know exactly how you feel like
Sorry, it really sucks to deal with that shit.
>And hey, if it helps your mood , the fact that you answered to my 1st reply in this thread makes me really happy,I rarely get replies so thanks for that
I'm glad it did something.
>same but my dad calls me often. I can just say hi to my mom when she comes from work so she knows I'm still there.
Yeah some days I just get too depressed to talk, especially if I'm in bed all day. I'm glad it works for you.
>yes it usually is but there is nothing I can do about it
Yeah I wish there was a way to change your personality.
>I just used to get really bad phases with lots of crying and psychotic stuff sometimes
Yeah get those sometimes but don't pay them too much mind. Crying and hearing stuff sucks but I hate the idea of medication more. I just hide when I cry and don't talk about anything so people don't get more concerned than they need to be.
>I don't know any other sites
Really? There's a lot of places. If you like it here you should stay but I just don't know how you do.

>i just came from a short trip, everything seemed fine but then i suddenly started to feel kinda sad and lonely
I'm sorry. I hope you liked your trip at least. I think it's normal to be a little sad after a lot of fun happens and it stops.
> Besides a friend told me while i was out that he tried to kill himself, i still don't know if he did it or not.
Hope he's ok. You should probably talk to him, if he tried recently he's in a bad spot right now.

>Just having goals is good.
really hurts when i don't reach them
>Worst case scenario you waste a few hundred on the one you have now.
i won't be having money for a while and the new rtx cards look real expensive

>I know exactly how you feel like
Sorry, it really sucks to deal with that shit.
>And hey, if it helps your mood , the fact that you answered to my 1st reply in this thread makes me really happy,I rarely get replies so thanks for that
>I'm glad it did something.

Me too man , I'm going to sleep , have an awesome week :D

>really hurts when i don't reach them
Yeah I understand, but better to have loved and lost and all that. Keep on trying and you'll reach at least some of your goals.
>i won't be having money for a while and the new rtx cards look real expensive
Are the prices a lot higher than the last gen? That sucks. I just think you probably will be hitting minimum requirements on everything for a long time so there's not much to regret.
>I'm going to sleep , have an awesome week
Good night and you too. Just so you know, > works like quotes do. Others might make fun of you for posting the way you just did.

Bought a speaker
Drove down to the seiner
Opened up my laptop after cleaning the engine room
Didn't write at all
Posted that I hit 50k words, which happened 3 weeks ago
God drunk and called my ex, she was with her bf so I hung up
Now I'm waiting to call my other ex, then going to a bar
Hopefully I can bring a girl back to the boat and show her how to live the drive shaft

>Keep on trying and you'll reach at least some of your goals.
working on it. i'm always on the verge of breakdown right now. i just want some validation that my life is worth living and a warm qt in my bed to come home to during the night
>Are the prices a lot higher than the last gen?
the 2080 costs more than my entire computer

Update, on phone and dont feel like quoting. Turns out she just likes Instagram dms better. She has a bunch of self esteem issues I'm gonna help her work out. I might make it robots.

after struggling badly with untreated mental illness
being kicked out of my childhood home
enlisting in the marine corps
finding out I had debilitating physical disability
being kicked out of the military for mental illness after being involuntarily institutionalized
getting into legal shit and going through hell trying to get treatment
spending 8+ years finding a good set of doctors, getting a diagnosis, getting on the right meds
finding a loving and supportive gf
beating severe alcoholism
getting off of almost all the meds
building a good relationship with my family and repairing our relationship
busting my ass for 12 years as a wagecuck

TODAY
TODAY I GOT MY FULL-TIME CLASSES FOR SCHOOL

TODAY MY LIFE BEGINS

TODAY WAS A GOOD DAY Jow Forums

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went out to buy cigarettes but it started raining midway to the the store so i went back to my house. my head hurts and i want to throw up, its humid and hot, i dont want to eat but feel hungry at the same time

>Bought a speaker
I hope you like it!
>Drove down to the seiner
What's a seiner? Pardon my ignorance.
>Didn't write at all
>Posted that I hit 50k words, which happened 3 weeks ago
You still hit a big milestone even if you couldn't feel inspired today. Good job.
>God drunk and called my ex
We all know that's a bad decision man. I hope things weren't too bad.
>Hopefully I can bring a girl back to the boat and show her how to live the drive shaft
Hope you can too. Good luck. IF you have all these exes I'm sure you can.
>Turns out she just likes Instagram dms better. She has a bunch of self esteem issues I'm gonna help her work out.
Oh that's good then. I hope working out with her is a good time. We all gonna make it brah, no questions asked.
You've led a hard life. I'm sorry you went through all that. You did it all for a purpose though, and I hope you're starting to see that things can be good.
>TODAY I GOT MY FULL-TIME CLASSES FOR SCHOOL
Congrats! I hope you do really well and can break the chains of wagecuckery. I believe in you. In no time you'll be a salary cuck instead.
>TODAY MY LIFE BEGINS
>TODAY WAS A GOOD DAY Jow Forums
I'm happy for you. Good luck in the future.
>went out to buy cigarettes but it started raining midway to the the store so i went back to my house
Sorry you got rained on. Hope you didn't get too wet.
>my head hurts and i want to throw up, its humid and hot, i dont want to eat but feel hungry at the same time
Sounds like you feel like trash. Sorry user. It's raining and hot and humid where you live? Are you a 3rd worlder? Either way I'm sorry you're having a tough time right now. Things will get better. I hope whatever's making you sick will stop.

>Are you a 3rd worlder?
y-yes, not amazonian rainforest tier hot and humid tho, im a spic

thought it was hot in murica too? climate change is not a meme it seems

It only gets hot and humid in the southeast. I just took you for one, not sure why. I don't think anything by it, just curious.

>I'm happy for you. Good luck in the future.
Thanks for all the kind words. Best of luck to you too

Got rejected by a girl I thought was interested in me.

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Post more qt animes

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>Thanks for all the kind words. Best of luck to you too
Don't mention it.
That sucks. Sorry user. I hope you can bounce back quickly.
I have 2.7 thousand megus but I'm not allowed to post more.

>2.7 thousand megus
That's a big folder.

That's after quality control duplicates and only she is in the picture. She is very cute.

it's 6:47am and I have to get my ass to work so mr. Noseberg can buy his 10th yacht and 35th iPhone also my hair is now a bit curly because I changed shampoo and conditioner

>tfw ignored
Heh.

Sorry you don't like wageslaving. Do you like your hair curly? I hope so.
just noticed this
I'm sorry I didn't ignore you I forgot. I really didn't mean to that's uncharacteristic of me. I normally don't mess things like that up sorry.
> i'm always on the verge of breakdown right now
Sorry about that. People talk about breakdowns but actually experiencing one is awful. Sorry you are in fear of that happening to you.
>i just want some validation that my life is worth living and a warm qt in my bed to come home to during the night
Hopefully I can be a tiny amount of validation but unfortunately can't do the second part lol.
>the 2080 costs more than my entire computer
Holy shit that's a lot of money.

>That sucks. Sorry user. I hope you can bounce back quickly.
Yeah, I hope too...

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No don't feel bad I just assume you missed it. Not a big deal really.
>People talk about breakdowns but actually experiencing one is awful. Sorry you are in fear of that happening to you.
Just jumped out of bed because a car passed by. Loud noises scare me.
>unfortunately can't do the second part lol.
You could but it wouldn't be in either of our best interests to do this
>Holy shit that's a lot of money.
Yeah and we don't even know how good it is

zzz i woke up late and spent most of the day crying

i also drew a tomato

>21
>Rarely go on Jow Forumsanymore compared to 6 months ago and have been living and feeling much more healthy
>Today is the first day I've gone on Jow Forums since
>First day of 4th year of College
>Had Communications (Normal Speech class required for everyone) and College Algebra
>Before this, I had my braces off for 5 weeks for the first time in 6 years since I got braces
>Always been having dizziness/headaches/nausea/shakiness problems to the point of utterly destroying my life and grades with concentration, stress and physical weakness
>When braces were off,started to feel good for the first time in years. >Laughed,smiled, felt emotions, could relax more
>Still had a good amount of pains of what I have, but still, a good amount less
>Get them back on 4 days ago
>Life is hell again
>Pain magnifies stress and makes it many times more harder to bare
>Could barely concentrate plus stress of speech class and liberal normies laughing at black Professor's sassy but not very funny jokes
>Girl that shows up 20 minutes late laughs at every one of them and giggles
>Dressed very immodestly: short shorts, type of loose/sleeveless top with baseball cap
>Hot too
>Asks more questions and raises hand more than any in the room
>"So when are your office hours"
>This girl most likely wants to have sex with the professor
>Get slightly turned on thinking about her eagerly sucking him off and them having wild sex
>Instantly disgusted that I respond that way instead of realizing she wants sex merely for his body instead of something long term
>all this adds to stress
>Dizziness worse, eye pain bad
>He goes on to say how he's involved in organizations "he's not supposed to say the name of" that "educate" students on islamaphobia, "benefits" of diversity, social justice, heads some social justice thing don't remember
>Jow Forums was right

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Don't worry you'll forget all about her. Just wait and it will stop mattering to you.
>No don't feel bad I just assume you missed it. Not a big deal really.
It's still rude so I'm sorry. An accident still causes harm so I feel bad anyways. Sorry big time.
>Loud noises scare me.
Yeah same here. Last thread just music that was too loud scared me and I had to spend a few minutes calming down. It's not even a startling factor anymore I'm just a massive pussy lol. If something startles me and is loud I just have a full blown panic attack.
>we don't even know how good it is
That's crazy. It better be worth the price with such a hefty one.
>i woke up late and spent most of the day crying
I'm sorry, crying is always awful. I hope it's cathartic and you're starting to feel better though. What's got you crying?
>i also drew a tomato
Why a tomato? I wanna see it!

cont.
>Keep seeing this blonde kid sitting far to my left just because he's one of the only 4 or 5 fellow white guys besides me in the class and is the only blonde I've seen
>He turns out to act the most friendly of the guys and asks about him being a "foodie"
>Hispanic or maybe arab (Weird looking hispanic with arabic tattoo writing covering entire arm) kid asks what he thinks about trump
>He pauses
>People start laughing including the 15 or so white girls and some guys
>Hear some skinny probably gay guy giggling in the back with this asian girl
>"I don't agree with his actions and I think he doesn't know how to run a country"
>Most people around me knodding their heads
>Says he'd rather be in another country than America because "No one knows where the country is going with the president"
Also
>When taking roll, asks people to state gender preference,be it he, she, them, they,xer etc
No joke.
This is Cypress College. A college with first a decent amount of asians,whites,then less hispanics and then less blacks. Crowd following liberalism has taken over. I've dropped speech 3 times because it's the only class I have alot of anxiety towards.

Every single professor for Communications has mentioned racial diversity positively despite it not directly relating to communicating. 2 were blacks, both flamboyant. One was arabic, Iranian, hates trump. Don't remember the other.

Currently procrastinating the firdt 3 minute easy mode speech. Hoping the braces removal tomorrow after class will be enough to finally be able to concentrate again and not have to deal with such headaches, dizziness and eye problems.

How are you OP? How has your day been so far?

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I'm sorry you've been having health problems and your braces make you so insecure. I hope they stop making such a problem for you.
>black Professor's sassy but not very funny jokes
I never got that sassy black humour. Normally it just comes off to me as being a catty and insulting person. Lots of black humour is great but I don't appreciate that kind as much as others.
>Jow Forums was right
Universities are pits of hedonism and indoctrination. It's the most egregious stage in the education system for indoctrination. That girl's gonna end up a whore or a housewife, and will do nothing with her life. Don't pay her any mind. Lefties and politics in general are annoying but they really don't matter in the big picture. Don't obsess over things out of your control when you can. It's a niggerlicious pit of deceit and brainwashing but you won't personally change that.
>Every single professor for Communications has mentioned racial diversity positively
Same happened at my high school. It's annoying but it's best to shut your mouth unless you want trouble.
>Hoping the braces removal tomorrow after class will be enough to finally be able to concentrate again and not have to deal with such headaches, dizziness and eye problems.
Are you getting them because of anxiety? Hopefully they don't hurt your psyche that badly. Just take some crooked teeth if the alternative means years of insecurity.
>How are you OP? How has your day been so far?
It's been decent. Took a shower because I felt like I should and was relatively calm all day despite being a little melancholy. Only got 2 panic attacks so really chill day.

I'm the braces poster.

Forgot to add that both my Dentist and I think the braces are pinching a sensitive and vital nerve that links to my eyes and possibly brain. Everythung links with what others reported experiencing. It feels like a direct line from the left side of jaw up to left middle part of head. Head is always hot too. Left eye is always the one in more pain
Sorry forgot about that.

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Oh that's a serious issue. I'm sorry about that. Hopefully you and your doctor figure out a way to fix it.

>Don't worry you'll forget all about her. Just wait and it will stop mattering to you.
I'm still trying to forget another girl from last year buddy. It doesn't get better.

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>Two panic attacks
Sorry OP. Well, I grew up Christian but stopped going to Church mostly the last 4 years. Started again the last 4 months a bit. I'll pray for you. Why not? Been thinking more about death and how most people have crappy lives. If this is it, and I die, it's not worth it. So,I'll put my hope that there is something after dying. And the Christian God seems like the one that doesn't lie and has more good values surrounding it.

>Showered
Yeah it helps me a bit too. I would put off showers more because I feel like crap and don't want to get up alot, but O just can't sleep or relax in bed decently if I don't shower so I just have to. I feel warmer for some reason if I don't shower too and it already gets hot enough here in Southern California.

God bless you OP, I will keep you in my prayers and write you down just to remember to do so. Why not, right? What else do I got if not an afterlife.

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This was the braces poster too btw. See ya!

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i thought clark kent was poor

I asked God for a sign and he smacks me across my face