/britfeel/

Finished reading Norwegian Wood today. The second book I have finished this year

Maybe I can get three done by Christmas, four at a stretch

I like to get outrageously drunk and watch the hobbit trilogy, then the LOTR trilogy. what I don't remember, I watch the next day with a hangover and a pot noodle

if you specify up front before paying probably

It's possible but she has to make the first move

>mx5

Every time I see one of these its some balding fat middle aged bloke in a rusty shit heap in the middle of his mid life crisis

if my mum tried to shag me id tell the fat pig to fuck off

Handed in my notice on Friday lads, with the intention of travelling for 4 months and then joining the marines. Been there for 3 years.

dad disowned me, came on banging on my mums door asking for his house keys back and demanding me to change my name.

so do any of you lads want to find a good porn video together that we can all watch and wank to at the same time?
would be good bants

so in essence she basically has to come to you looking for sex?

Pondering whether to post a body shot lads - to prove I'm a lean sex machine. Should I do it?

Got college tomorrow, I miss being a neet sometimes, you could do what you like

What did you pay for your Jag and how old is it?

Miss Lenlad and his big opening post when he'd say good evening. Made the place have a sense of community for a short lived while.

depends on the porn init bruv

yeah n put some frilly nipple tassles on as well ya slaaaaag

Why are bongs such faggots?

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Exactly.
He was a thief lad.

my auntie was telling me that she thinks if i want to get a gf i need to play the long game
she said im not the type of guy who's ever going to sweep a girl off her feet straight away so i basically need to be there through all her heartbreaks until she realises im a good safe option
is this good advice or is she memeing me into being an orbiter?

any other /lit/bros here, what are you reading?

>Dragon Quest XI's '18 year old character'
You aren't fooling anyone, Japanonces

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Noone cares. Ebin certainly doesn't, posting it here won't make him care about your life

memeing you lad, get her to shag you

whatever you want lad, we can choose the video together

proper good video to wank to lads
xvideos.com/video10278341/elle_the_perfect_housewife

doubt that would happen to me, not that I really want it to but at the same time I wouldn't turn it down

>what are you reading?
yer mums bra size sticker

ive just finished brave new world and trying to decide what to read next
how about you?

How bleak

>fat
>no sex
whats even the point though lad?

She's got an adorable design don't bring your noncing into this. Toriyama's designs are so stale but atleast the little girls always have that cute look.

I just want to see my friends again I love them so much

the tartar steppe, it is depressing as fuck
think next im gonna read another classic i havent read yet, pride and prejudice or something

Yeah I want to know this too.

>Joining the marines

Not advisable. Plenty of better things to do.

I love ellie roe

>looking through the last thread
>so many people saying theyve fucked girls
absolute state of britfeel nowadays

what the fuck is this dead of night bullshit get it off

>thirteenth day in a row I've been high
>uni starting again soon
>mental health has gone to shit and I'm too depressed to even seek help
>another year of a meme degree and pretending to want to socialise

I need another joint lads

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Never cared for his art style tbqhwy. Araki any day, for those succulent blowjob lips (male).

never heard of it, any good?
i tend to alternate between something ive found that sounds interesting and a 'classic' i feel i should read

>but atleast the little girls always have that cute look

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i'd guess most of them were larping about it

Been watching Overlord on crunchy roll.
Several episodes in. Always wish I had pals to adventure with IRL.

youtube.com/watch?v=7w-eVgDqMB4

synth tunes

anyone watching the tennis by any chance?
its the us open final

whats it about? currently rolling joints for my anime binge

It's fine for dragonball but quest would be much better branching out.
Yes lad small children are cute, that's pretty normal. The fact you think with your cock 24/7 isn't.

t. new fag

fuck off, lads in here have always shagged girls and spoke about it. absolute state of britfeel when newfags think they have any say.

had a week of not masturbating and now im desperate for it every night

it is good although basically nothing happens. i think it would resonate with robots who are stuck in monotony and complacency since the character is in the same situation
there was one particular passage about getting older and life leaving you behind, missed opportunities etc that hit me like a train

SCEA reckons he's nobbed a good 15-25! That fucker's a certified noman shit cunt.

>15-25
Yeah and I've fucked 1~300, quite the wide margin there

>newfag
nice projection there buddy
yeah ive never liked him, shouldnt be allowed if you ask me

Why you not having a wank lad? Don't tell me you fell for the No Fap meme

>only see bf on weekends normally
>he's putting on weight
>eats generally ok when im with him (i cook us meals)
>eats like shit at work and during the week when im not there
how do i get him to stop, i dont want a fat bf

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Don't you know lad it's an incel board since r/incel got shutdown
appropriating fucks

Eh like 2 years ago there was a poll saying most people here have shagged at least once. Makes sense, british girls are some of the easiest in the world

>Sakulard disliked and reported this post

sounds good, i felt a similar way about stoner by john williams, i just got this real sense of how mundane life is

Shame is a powerful motivator, get healthier and fitter yourself and hell fall in line.
Fear is better, make subtle hints that he'll lose you if he doesn't get his act together.

fuck the fat out of him

>british girls are some of the easiest in the world
SHUT UP YOURE JUST RUBBING IT IN NOW FFS

Gods speed lad.
Why Marines and not Paras?
Make sure to train hard for it though, even if you can make minum requirements because you'll be run ragged.

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>meh projection

how can i be projecting when you revealed yourself as a newfag? most lads in here have shagged girls, if you dont like it fuck off
simple as.

whats your favourite book/author fren?

My first ever shag was July 16th, 2014 in Newbury, Berkshire.

My most recent one was September 17th, 2016 in Rugby, Warwickshire

My most recent kiss was September 24th 2017 in Scarborough, North Yorkshire

My most recent hug was December 29th 2017 in Leamington spa, Warwickshire

never kissed
never held hands
never had sex
last time I hugged a girl was years ago

yeah stoner is great, it seemed every time something good happened in his life something terrible happened right after and eventually he stopped enjoying anything at all
the part about how he was happy that his daughter is an alcoholic because at least she has something to stop her feeling like shit for a while was really sad too

Paras are fucked now. Wouldn't be surprised if they are disbanded on foot of the forthcoming inquiry into the Ballymurphy Massacre. Watched the documentary on it last night, made me feel ashamed for serving with them.

>My most recent hug was December 29th 2017 in Leamington spa, Warwickshire
Fucking grim

Manic depression is such a cooler name than bipolar disorder.

It's true though lad, I don't judge anyone for being a virgin but how many people in these threads are virgins and don't go clubbing? It's almost impossible to go clubbing and not pull, the girls just start chatting to you while you're waiting for drinks or just sitting in the smoking area. But I feel like most lads here that are virgins don't want to have some one night stand which is very difficult in todays culture because it's how most people have sex these days.

I'm too much of a pussy to go to a club

When's SoiCuntExposesAll doing his nudey pic?

I have been clubbing plenty of times and never spoken to a girl while in a club, those 'spontaneous' conversations don't happen unless you look good

you're not missing out lad
>shit music
>cant hear anyone
>chavs that cant handle their drink

hey shippy you wanna do a meetup again?

Being a virgin is failed normie shit
A robot can't hack a relationship but can get his dick wet.

You replied to the wrong bloke- better things to do- possibly for you, but not for me. It's the only option for me mate

I'm not in great shape at the moment but I will get there.

>, the girls just start chatting to you while you're waiting for drinks or just sitting in the smoking area.

You must live in a strange area or you're a chad. i used to go clubbing regularly in my late teens and this very rarely happened to me or anyone one i knew. not a virgin btw, i dated all the girls i shagged.

>But I feel like most lads here that are virgins don't want to have some one night stand
I think you're right on the money. Lot of posters here have some disney princess complex going on.

Smoking area is the best place to chat up birds. Always get them asking for a light and thats your window to chat with them and ask them do they want a drink when you go back in.

It really not that hard. I think you lads think about things too much and then fuck it up somehow.

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Makes sure you are the fittest you I've ever been in your life by the time you go for phase 1. Marines fucking hard. How do you plan on staying fit over the 4 months?

Fair lad, but my point still stands. I wouldn't blame being a virgin on women being too stuck up or lasses thinking you're ugly. It's more you're too socially anxious to go out and meet girls. I can guarantee if you got past your anxiety and went to clubs you'd lose your virginity after a couple of times visiting. The whole 'you need to be some sauve smooth talker' to pull is a literal meme, drunk girls will fuck you just because they're smashed and lonely.
>just learned I'm good looking
always thought I was a fat mess, but I live up north and i hear girls are lot nicer up here than down south

na night ziggeh, see ya in the mornin' pal 123

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>Smoking area is the best place to chat up birds.
this. just ask a girl if she wants to go outside for a smoke too, even if they dont smoke normally lots of people do it when drinking

Army already has plans for them in the coming restructurings so I don't see them going anywhere
You'll want to be in top shape if you want a solid chance lad. Marines I know through friends of are unironically absolute units

one thing, I don't smoke but for real i don't think about it because they are drunk women they wont remember what I say 10 minutes down the line if i spoke to them anyway

>been out clubbing many times in liverpool, leeds and york
>literally never pulled a girl in a club
>a girl has never started a conversation with me in a club
>90 per cent of the times ive started one theyve looked at me weird and walked away

what meme degree you on lad?

>hour glass figure
>male
fml