What's the cringiest thing you ever said to a girl, that still haunts you to this day?

Probably some wall of text declaration of love or something. Doesn't haunt me though, who cares.

Used m'lady unironically

>girl wants me to fuck her
>can't get it up
>"sorry, it's because i'm addicted to internet porn"
jesus christ, i could have just told her i was too drunk, which definitely would have been believable.

That I watch Asian porn

she was a Chinese girl

>sent modified Percy Jackson fan fics (replaced names with mine and girls name) to my crush on myspace

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>be 15 in highschool
>be stoner
>meet this girl at school who also smokes weed, she was asking me if I could get her pills for her mum and she also happened to live in same general area as me
>I ask her at least 10+ times that day if she wants to hang out sometime and smoke weed with me
>she agreed but I was a sperg and kept asking
it was so cringe, everyone else could tell I really liked her and kept asking her

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jesus, this takes the cake so far

Asked out a girl I liked in high school if she wanted to go to the movies with me and she ignored me and pretended she couldnt here me. Havent really spoken to a woman since

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Was she weirded out too or did she just go with it. If she didnt care then its not that big of a deal

called a girl a Commie bitch indirectly

I love you
Even though I know I didn't, I knew I didn't love her. But she loved me...I couldn't break her heart. She was too fragile.

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this one was less than a year ago.
Go on date, it goes pretty well i think. Time to go, and ideally for like a goodbye hug/kiss.
I gave her a firm, manly handshake.

she was weirded out, we never hung out after school other than when I would get weed for her.
she was small as fuck as well.

I've also opted to give a girl a firm handshake instead of hugs too... An absolutely mortifying memory to think back on.

>read out an emo poem to a girl that cheated on me
>thought it would make her regret treating me badly
>she thought it was hilarious
still have it, everytime I think about that day I feel like killing myself.

You guys need to cut the shit. You legitimately have destroyed lives. You better say a prayer because you and the ppl closest to you are dead. This isn't a joke. It's going to get ugly. Not a threat, a promise.

Men are able to choose which girl they want to date vs how girls have to wait for men to make a move on them, that's why we are superior. Being a man means to keep trying even if you keep failing.

I don't really know, whenever i talk with girls there's this part of my brain that takes control, it feels as if one of my ancestors took control of my body while telling me "here, let me do this for you so i make sure that you don't fuck this shit up", i can remember what i did and what i said, but the whole time it's happening, i feel as if i'm just watching things as an spectator, not the one doing them.
Funnily enough, that has worked 100% of the times, i've never spilled my spaghetti and girls think of me as a confident, cool and aloof guy.
This however, only works in person, i'm absolutely terrible at texting.
It's some pretty weird shit.

I once sang hey their deliala to a girl in 8th grade

>hey i know we live together but do you want to try sex? i could like teach you about your own body and stuff like your asshole

>i feel as if i'm just watching things as an spectator, not the one doing them.
I felt this, I'm a completely different person when i'm talking to a girl I like. I kinda understand when girls complain about guys not being who they thought they were.

Once I was going to go up to a random stranger in a mall and say a pickup line

Instead I literally went up to her and my mind went blank because I was so nervous and I just said "nfuhwhaufuw"

"I want you to use me as your sex toy"

"I want him to use me as his sex toy"

>be me
>fail st getting normal job
>get job selling pyramid scheme knock-off perfume
>Friday night
>trying to sell perfume to drunk bar sluts and shit
>get called over to a car by the front passenger
"so&so in the back wants to talk to you"
>back window rolls down
>I stick my head in
>9.5/10 drunk milf smiling at me
>the cougar aura was thick
>sexy drunk milf flirts hard with me
>I don't know what the fuck I'm doing
>sexy drunk milf hands me a $5
>wuts going on?
>maybe she wants a spritz of perfume
>reach for her hand
>she let's me take it
>10/10 hand. Want to kiss it. She would almost certainly like that. Do nothing instead
>reach into bag
>retrieve bottle and spritz her slender milky white wrist with victoria secret heavenly knock-off
>she likes my choice
>I turn around and begin to fumble away
>sexy drunk milf calls to me again
"Don't leave yet, cutie!"
>poke head back in
>sexy drunk milf smiles and slowly lifts her top exposing her tight, perky, creamy white, 11/10 tits and small soft pink diamond hard 13/10 nipples
>what do I even? This can't be happening, TO ME...
>sexy drunk milf leans forward and pushes out her chest
"what do you think, cutie?"
>....
>I autistically blurt out the first thing tthat comes to mind
>....
>not bad
>not bad?
>NOT BAD!
>she seems disappointed
>I turn and walk away
>mfw I realized what I just passed up a minute later

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"I love you"
I did. But I should've kept it to myself.

How the fk do you even remember a conversation from first grade

>"D-do you want to go to prom with me?"

big no

>if you don't want to text back, that's okay I understand!

>joked to the whole class in high school that women evolved in the kitchen

>made a joke about women "being where they belonged" to a woman who was in a abusive relationship

horrible. I hate it.

>give me a chance, please, i'm so lonely
I was 15, she ripped me apart

Damn. Hope you know better now

I have passed up sex from autisim so many times my dude.

Yeah i do, but the scar makes me stop hitting on a girl if i sense even the slightest amount of disinterest. I never want to be called a creep again.

>still interested in the somalian slave?

>told a girl that tampons were a form of masturbation

Wtf was wrong with me. Thank god i evolved. Now i can hide my autism.

>What's the cringiest thing you ever said to a girl, that still haunts you to this day?
Nothing. I said nothing. That's what haunts me.

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When i had 12. I Forgot an important part

Holy kek, wtf?!?!?!?!?!

Well... objectively she was a 9.5/10
To me she was a fucking 35/10 considering I REALLY liked older women on top of her covering everything on my "physically perfect checklist"
That was also the only time in my life a woman has shown even the slightest interest.

Seriously, what did I actually miss out on??

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>she asks what my name is
>i say a name that rhymes with pooper
>she doesnt seem to have heard me very well
>"no i didnt say pooper"
why am i so unfunny and gay

That's your issue, you give a shit. Not an attractive trait

Sex and the pleasures of flesh. You lost also a lot of experience points. You lost confidence also. Imagine how you would have felt if you fucked that woman. Your confidence would have risen atleast 30 points. Enough to have the balls to get a decent gf.

That's just the beginning, I think.
>still a virgin at +30

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Wtf.. wait are you virgin at 30? Omg why dont you pay a prostitute? Why do this to yourself?
Even better tell the prostitute that you are a virgin. If you use your words correctly she might fuck you really good. Your life problems will be solved. Obviously use protection.
Or are you the type of person that thinks the first time is really important and must be romantic?

Probably either that time in kindergarten I started talking about the African savanna trying to impress some girl named Savannah, or some stuff I said to some BPD girl I know.
I don't know if the latter ones count so much because she's more nuts than a gay gym's shower room, so she probably doesn't even remember it.

>Cute Girl asks me if I want to go with her to the fair
>"The fair is boring"
>Walk away

[wall of text about why linux is great]

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this might be the most legitimately autistic ITT

>not wearing glasses
>see her
>wave
>assume she waved back
ff to later
>"did you wave to me earlier?"
>"no?"

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I have said many a cringe worthy thing to one specific girl. The lyric to i love you but i hate you by tyler the creator and suicide threats. It got to the point where i would stand out side her house and threaten to kill her. I am so lucky i am not in jail.

Once asked the girl in high school that I had oneitis for for pity sex. Over MSM.

My whole obsession with her was ridiculously cringey but i was an emotional little bitch at the time.

Over 30 and still a virgin.
Have always had anxiety problems but it's much worse now than it was then. There almost no way I could actually fuck a prostitute. Hell I can hardly leave the house and even say hello back to a cashier at a gas station.

Yeah, I wanted the first time to be special once. That idea died by the time I was 18, so...

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Should've done it directly

Have you ever went to a psychiatrist? Or took some pills to help with nerves?
When i had 20 i took alprazolam 0.25 mg. Almost nothing every 3 or 4 days. For a month. Without recipe obviously. It really helped me. Then i went into weed. I smoked weed for like a year. After that decided to stop smoking and the nerves just disappeared. Try something or seek help.
Sex is an important part of life. Is our biological imperative. We live to have sex basically. If we dont do it our brains just explode. I've talked with many people that had their first time when they were adults and it solves many confidece issues, sleep problems, depression. Its really amazing the psychological power that it has on us.

Post poem

Originalellel

The anxiety makes seeking help as much of a problem as anything else.
Right now much of that sort of thing is on hold since taking care of my father has essentially become a full-time job.

>What's the cringiest thing you ever said to a girl, that still haunts you to this day?
nothing I said, but I remember blushing and turning red, after a qt sat right next to me and just started talking to me.
I still can't get that shit out of my head.

>am i cute?
apparently i forgot i ever said it to her
someone reminded me

Pretty cringy i know

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>meet girl at con
>end up walking around with her for the entire second day
>she keeps getting stopped for pictures due to her cosplay, a reasonably well known character
>she didn't think she would, I said she would
>tell her "Told you you'd keep getting asked for pics"
>"You think it's cause of the cosplay?"
>think it's because any decent looking girl in a decent looking cosplay is gonna get asked for pics
>say "Yeah the cosplay is recognisable and looks good, it's definitely the cosplay."
>realise that basically comes across as me saying "People like the outfit, not you."
>mfw

That was the only female I've spoken to IRL in my entire life outside of a work/school scenario.

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It's easier to remember shit that's traumatic or stupid shir that you did because it sticks in your mind.

Part 2. It is embarrassing to read at times

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>joked to the whole class in high school that women evolved in the kitchen

>made a joke about women "being where they belonged" to a woman who was in a abusive relationship

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A girl wanted to hug me but I straight up told her not to because I stink.
Classmates gave me shit for it, but I'd rather have that than to see her reaction after.
Not fat but I sweat very easy and no amount of deodorant or anti-perspiration stuff will get rid of the smell.

>A girl wanted to hug me
why did she want to?

I helped her out with some group project and she wanted to show appreciation.

basically say nothing when she's trying to talk to me

>Not fat but I sweat very easy and no amount of deodorant or anti-perspiration stuff will get rid of the smell.

Change your diet
Yea man, you did the right thing
communication and honesty is the keys

Stfu stupid faggot

>Change your diet
What stuff should I start with?

In a terrible imitation of a black man, I proclaimed "ay yo baby girl" to make her laugh. then i did it again when she brought together all her friends.
it made her laugh, but not in the way i intended.

>i love you
Totally unwarranted

So I was helping this grad student transport the cultures incubated in radioactive sugar to the machine that would measure how radioactive they were.

She had it in some lead casing, and was having trouble moving it (because lead is heavy). I picked it up with decent form, without realizing that I was ass-to-grass squatting and unintentionally showing off my ass.

As I drove her, I talked for about the entirety of the 30 minute drive about powerlifting and Rippetoe. She was british, and kind've just put on a polite smile through it all.

I hauled this lead box to the gcounter, which was obviously built in the 80's. The tech fucked off hours ago, but everything was hooked up so she tried running the samples.

She (and I, as her driver) spent the next two hours trying to get this FORTRAN OS shit working. Luckily I know legacy systems and eventually developed some workarounds.

She was super grateful that I helped her out since the tech wasnt answering his phone and this shit aint on stackoverflow, but I know she didnt appreciate the Jow Forumsbabble.

I took my female friend to the beach when I was 20 because I said I had something important to discuss with her. Then I asked her "will you have sex with me?"

I still get cold sweats thinking about it to this day. I had to go back home and share a house with this girl for another 8 months.

In first grade i proclaimed I had a crush on a girl as if it was some grand announcement. No idea why I remember this I don't think she or anyone else does so I think of it as a good innocent memory. Worse one was when I was 15 and told a girl her tits got bigger.

I asked my mums co worker when the baby was due whhen she got fat

omg god I'm floored rofl lmao
btw I understand perfectly

not anything I said, but still haunts me
>highschool
>last 3 or 4 weeks before summer
>complete loser
>still never had gf, feel really bad
>sitting with all the other weird kids at lunch
>see qt a few tables down sitting alone
>tell other kids im going to talk to her
>big mistake
>fat kid tells her i like her, like we're in elemtry school or something
>really embarrassed
>takes me a week to work up the courage to approach her
>ask her if I can sit with her, she notice me
>think she's ignoring me
>walk to the library, cry to myself
>think about it, realize she had headphones and didnt notice me
>see her for the rest of highschool in hallways and classess, still always to scared to approch

>Nothing. I said nothing.
heh

I was 16 and text this really hot girl if she would be my girlfriend.

One the last times I went binge drinking with some uni buddies, I couldn't see without my glasses. I was unsure which bitch bar wench was ready to serve me a drink, I randomly said "hello" to this blond bitch that served me earlier... She laughed in my face.

Sent lyrics from emo songs I wrote myself