User you want one of these chocolate bars?

>user you want one of these chocolate bars?

No, I’m okay. Thanks.

>hahaha, user thinks he’s too cool for chocolate

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Fuck em.
No seriously. Fuck them. In the ass. Assert your fucking dominance over anyone who questions you.

>at dinner restaurant with parents and cute blonde waitress has been hovering all night
>as we leave she says “I hope you enjoyed your meal” side note there’s no tipping so it wasn’t that
>mum moves ahead while girl starts sayin random stuff, only dad and I hear what she says next.
“I live just across the road”
And how do I reply?
“Cool, you’ll never be late for work”
>then I practically run off, due to fear, awkwardness and pure, concentrated autism.

>in car and dad tells mum what happened, mum orders me to go back in and talk to her, I don’t want to because of said reasons.
>go back inside and wait in the lobby for 5 minutes while browsing fit on my phone.
>return to car, “she wasn’t there I couldn’t find her”

The look of sadness and disappointment they gave me still haunts me.
.
>woman comes into my workplace
>asks ‘if I (she) was an umbrella where would she be?k
>automatically reply ‘in the boot of my car’
>she gets nervous and leaves

I thought this was a stroke post, but I carefully reread it and now understand that you're just retarded or you dont speak english

>hey user, I brought in donuts
>come on don't be such a mood killer
>it's triple chocolate nutella death wish with extra caramel sauce!
>well if you don't want to enjoy yourself then that's ok I guess

i can feel their blood sugar skyrocket

A girl at my old job sincerely told me to fuck off because I turned down a sugary sweet.

Fucking dummy

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YES that is right

>In the boot of my car
Based and redpilled

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>not a nip
>she's a lesser asian
at least she isn't filipino

>it aint me starts playing

>spent loads of money on chocolate bars and sweets for Halloween
>no kids came to the door
>literally not one
>huge pile of candy just sitting in the kitchen

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throw it out, NOW!

I bring candy to the office and enjoy watching my coworkers gorge themselves on terrible shit Jow Forums, i am a bad person

yes

not sure if this is bait, but the song title is "Fortunate Son"

>be student, studying in a city an hour away from home
>coming home from uni
>in train station, go to buy a coffee before getting on the train
>Jehovah's Witnesses proselytising to the barista
>they leave when they see I'm waiting behind them
>barista is cute South African redhead
>thanks me for making them leave and we joke about it
>talk for a while, she's telling me about her family and shit
>need to leave to catch the train
>she says I have to come back and see her
>'yeah I'll come back ;)))'

>got kicked out of uni and haven't visited that city for almost 6 years

r u bait

if you don't live in an affluent neighborhood most kids trick or treat at malls

>being this much of a try-hard gymcel autist

at least you aren't drowning puppies

>see those boxes of like 50 or 70 snack sized chocolates
>never even bought one box this year

dark chocolate is literally very good for you

fucking kek

Like its an achievement

This litteraly happened to me yesterday wtf

that's why I have pure cocoa powder and I use it in certain foods. What I don't do is buy those poison bars.

or maybe he just doesn't have any cravings for refined sugars, fucking fatty.

I bought a big bag of candy and I can't stop eating it. It's been giving me horrible heartburn for the past week, but I'm bulking so I have to keep going

Is it any good for making hot cocoa?

Literally never happened to me. Maybe a slight banter a la "yeah because you're so fucking fat, right?", but we laugh about it because none of us are autists.
Ditch your friends if they're that much of an assholes.

I feel like anything chocolate is unhealthy for you. I'm aware dark chocolate is somewhat healthy for you, and I suppose everything in moderation, right? I'd try to stay away from anything chocolate.

That's not how this works

>asks ‘if I (she) was an umbrella where would she be?k

Over my head? What response is she looking for?

You are a savage, user. Don't change.

I’ve read this before

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She was asking if anyone had seen her umbrella, like she left it there

>not 'naplam sticks to kids'