Gym bard plays my tune when I come in

>gym hero charging his sword in the power cage

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this nigga on wwe

>gym negroes keep to themselves until gather in groups greater than 3
>babble speak ensues, along with clapping, foot stomping, 360 turns, and fist pumping
>hideous laughter from their mouths with 48 teeth per jaw
>females wearing painted on tights to emphasize horrendous glute size
>I scamper to the Emergency Gas Release, press the button, and shout "14/88" as I lock the exit behind me.
>I feel nothing

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>gym jester struck my funny-bone
>arm collapses during bench

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I never really realized He-man was literally gorilla gripping the edges of his sword what the fuck is he doing

Kek

>gym nigger steals my bike when i park it

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>gym serial killer quietly smears lubricant on the bar during rest time.

>Gym wench won't serve me beverages

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>gym dwarves escape the creatine mines grinding the production to a halt
>gym merchant start hiking prices immediately
>have to barter away barbexcalibur just to keep my gains
How the fuck is this fair bros? Can I tell the gym inquisitors about their greedy schemes?

have ye heard the tale of user the autistic
his muscles were big, but boy what a dipshit
did he have a girlfriend? No, be realistic
he sat home all day on Jow Forums posting pictures

>have to barter away barbexcalibur just to keep my gains

HE PAID THE IRON PRICE

>gym assassin rubs poison on his barbell for his PR attempt

>newest members of the gym are a dozen elf girls participating in a cultural exchange program
>they all look like they're 16 but are actually 300 years old, give or take.
>sweatingorcs.png

>dealing with gym sage
>ask if I can trade facepulls for some light stretches at home
>NON NEGOTIABLE

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>gym slaves are starting a rebellion

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>year of our lord 2018
>not half-swording
Not gonna make it

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>half swording with your bare hands
I'm sorry but my calluses aren't that developed yet

>Gym clown makes fun of my tune

>manlets captured squat racks and charge 10% tax on gains to use them

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youtu.be/vwuQPfvSSlo
Never gonna make it

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>chaddius longdick helps the maiden I've been fond of with her squat form

I swear I will have chaddius's head for this

>gym wizard levitating weights in the power cage
fucking magic users, guy must be 80 years old but can lift 5x my max...

>gym Thugs came to take my weekly protection gains fee

IT"S NOT FAIR BROSSSS

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>manlet bandits caught stealing centimeters again

Stop right there criminal scum.

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Congrats, you’re the new gym bard!

Be glad we aren't charging more cloud head.

>trip and fall into manlet pit
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

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Trip? Or pushed?. Really makes you think

should be easy to get out unless you were one of them all along

in my gym anyone that falls in is quickly beat over the head with dumbells and then they fight over who gets the femurs

just master the ancient art of kicking manlets to keep them at a distance

>trips into manlet pit
>easily step out

>trips into manlet pit
>decapitated
heh, nice try bucko

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>gym scavengers constantly raiding the weight room all across the borders
>the invasion of the cardio bunnies under their new king Gluttila the Bun
>the chad emperors in the west and the east cannot form a stable alliance to protect the humble DYELs
>the Pax Gymnasia under Augustus Zyyzer is a distant memory
>The old gods have been forgotten in favour of big JC. Jeff Cavaliere. Complained about shoulder impingement and shoulder impingement when nailed to the cross.

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Keked

>gym halfling still hasn't learned

>Barbexcalibur: the barbell of promised gains
Lmao you don't even need Creatine because of Barbexcalibur's passive anabolic effect.
Did some high level Chad just gift it to you or something?

>the virgin wizards try to group up and takeout high level Chad
Never seen a raid wipeout so fast

>Gym slayer blew his rotator cuff ripping a transformed cardio bunny in half :^(
>try-hard Chad OD'd on super-life
>gym now smells like smoke, salt, and blood

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>Gym gnomes keep sleeping in duffel bags and stealing earphones to make theor stupid fucking swings

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>gym ICE agent splits up happy families of matching plates

Good one

>implying manlets won’t attempt to hold you down there forever

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At least one of them had chicken

>gym priest casts Power Word: Shield right when im about to fail at bench press so I can roll out safelly

>head to gym after seeing the latest flicque at the cinema
>Cinema showers were full so couldn't get the eagle shit off me, my date didn't show up so they put me in the singles section under the aviary
>Gym warden gets distracted by my anvil
>"I swear it's for the cinema I was gonna put it in my locker"
>too late
>fucking gym dwarves have snuck in and stolen my god damn anvil
>they take it to the creatine mines
>4thtimethismonth.manlet

fuck the gym

>gym imam issues a fatwa against deadlifting

>gym wizard keeps trying to sell me his weak potions
>says a beginner can't handle trendaline and clenophorm
>keeps trying to sell me easy mined creatine and C4 health booster
>I sneak them from his gym sack
>the sack warns me of the powers of Tren
>I shrug him off a reach a PR for squat at 135lbs
>Getting all the gains

Am I gonna make it bros?

Sorry to say this, but you suffer from severe schizophrenia.
You're not gonna make it.

>start going to the gym because my falcon fell into the popcorn mines when I went to go see aquaman and I can't afford a new one
>First day there they hire a gym shooter
God fucking damn it

>Tfw the gym schizo keeps trying to invent new lifting styles
>tfw the gym chad is encouraging him to do it for luls

STOP DOING WEIGHTED DUMBBELL SITUPS WHILE HANGING OFF THE POWER RACK YOU FREAK

> t. January 1st time traveler

Why such a long AAA?

The fall is short, user. I'd know.

>the gym trap keeps flirting with me inbetween sets

>gym warlock keeps sacrificing manlets to try and appease a greater gains demon
seriously dude, if you're gonna go that route at least use cardio bunnies you amateur

>self-proclaimed gym druid touting "all-natural" supplements
>why_not.d&d
>takes my gp and hands me a flask
>down it in one gulp
>nothing happens
>turns out he was the gym Jew-id

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Underrated post

>youtube.com/watch?v=GjjexmdXK_s
>tfw walking into the gym with the bois

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Kek’d

This thread doesn’t deserve this post tobh

Lol

>Gym barbarians won't stop screaming their lungs out while lifting
>Gym rogues stealing from the lockers again
>Only free squat rack was a mimic
>Gym monks levitating in the other squat racks

Why do I still go here?

ONEOFUS
O
N
E
O
F
U
S

Underrated

based /fitv/

Kek

>>Only free squat rack was a mimic
>save vs my fucking sides
>natural 1

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Potion seller, im gonna need your strongest potions

>gym Chad is also gym schizo

>gym programmer is hogging the platforms again

>Manlets burrowing in the pit again
>Accidentally unearth a burial site for 1000 year old swole spirits
>We had no idea there was an ancient tomb buried six feet beneath the gym.

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Goblins?

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>go to gym to crush new Bench PR
>manlets stole the bench again
>nobody wants to venture into the pit, so we ask gym wizard to teleport it up
>gym wizard casts "bench appearo"
>suddenly loud voice fills the room, seemingly coming from everywhere
>"FACTS DON'T CARE ABOUT YOUR FEELINGS."
>still no bench
>mfw can't attempt new bench pr

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Noice

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>be aye
>wiþin þe gymme
>preforme bowstring pull wiþ myche load, hoisteþ þe steale
>fayrest whench in alle þe lande arrviveþ to þe gymme
>VIIII/X
>tread forþ to þe lovelych byrde
>"g-greetings lady fayre"
>"gode be wiþ ye sir, of hwæt do ye wish to speake? whæt is þy knychtly sigil?"
>"uuhm, aye am no knycht"
>spilleth myne pottage from pochet vpone grovnde
>gymme knycht ryddeþ vp to þe whench, takeþ her in his bossom and ryddeþ on his wey.

Loo! Hwæt shal man do to woo a whench from þe noble sir knycht?

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KEK

But what souls on Earth are so tortured as the Manlet?

Why haven't you accepted Jeff into your heart?

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