Asshole Problems General

I have the EXACT SAME PROBLEM

You can get it removed but I do not recommend this unless its fuck huge and especially if its internal because those can be dangerous. Get some cotton swabs and witch hazel and dab your asshole. Alternatively just buy the preparation h wipes and use those as your last wipe after you shit. Don't clean your ass with them but just wipe with them to put some witch hazel on it. Work on not pushing hard.

Thanks for the suggestions. Someone IRL recommended one of those squatty potty things, does anyone here have one?

You wipe too hard/much.
T. Likes to wipe it too much/hard when itchy.

how the fuck am i supposed to get all the shit off my asshole then bud? im not gonna stop wiping if the paper still has shit on it.

I kinda just "pluck" around it with paper, after it comes back clean I use two wetwipes.
T. Clean asshole owner.

Related issue, after every time I take a shit I usually feel discomfort in my stomach and asshole like I want to take another shit. What can I do to fix this?

pluck? this is new to me... maybe your asshole isnt as hairy as mine? or have i been wiping wrong this whole time.. im using more of a scrubbing technique.

Are you fiber deficient OP?

Sometimes when I shit I feel residiual slime coming from my asshole and I have to wipe it 30mins-1hour later. How do I fix this?

maybe he means dab? I scrub my brown away too and I too get blood on my tp. Does yours hurt? Mine doesn't

>I have to wipe it 30mins-1hour later.

I also experience this occasionally.

I dont think Im fiber deficient, I eat salads and shit. Should I get some fiber1 bars too?

it hurts but usually its bearable, sometimes its worse than normal.

Maybe I don't have hemorrhoids, maybe I just have a cut or tear on my hole that I open up whenever I take a shit. I don't put stuff up my ass though.

>not having a bidet
>first world countries
I will never understand this, you are just smearing the shit all over your anus

Mine is also hairy, I basically pluck the length of the hairs(read:not plucking them out) because I realised that shit stuck around afterwards(underwear skidmarks) when I didn't pluck.
My sense of smell is very strong like all of my senses and I'm also a bit of a cleanliness is next to Godliness kinda guy.
T. Real Autismo bean.

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Maybe. I eat plenty of mixed nuts and my ass loves it.

Anyone else love the feeling of a big poop coming out of your anus?

I've had hemorrhoids in the past...that sounds like hemorrhoids...or anal cancer not even kidding. Does it hurt to sit down? That would be a definite sign of hemmies. Either way you need to go see a doctor.

how forceful is the water coming out of those things anyways? is it a gentle stream or is it like a pressure washer, because i would need a pressure washer.

>or anal cancer not even kidding

Jeez I hope not, this has been going on for quite a while now. If it was cancer I should be dead already. but IDK.

I probably do need to see a doctor but I dont wanna.. I dont want anybody poking around down there. ..

that good stretch. I like a bristol stool of 3

it depends on the pressure of your water line, I have a water tank in my roof anyway, water pumps connected to the service line are prohibited
if you don't have space for a dedicated bidet buy a bidet spray or bidet shower, they go in toilets

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I had a tiny pea one because of stress, it went away

Just go. I put it off for a while and it just made me anxious. It's weird but keeping their job requires them to be comepletely professional.
If there isn't blood dripping into the toilet, you're probably fine, and will be okay as long as you follow the threads advice. Still, see a doctor if you're worries or it doesn't go away/becomes chronic.

I used to have a similar problem, caused by heavy lifting, and alcohol consumption, and using standard toilet paper at home.
It's a bit more difficult "in public" because they have the cheapest TP you can buy,,,, but when you gotta go....
So---- supplementing with Fish Oil solved all my problems, without having to give up craft brews, nor big weights. You want to blast, then cruise with the Fish Oil.
Also,,, I no longer use standard TP here at home. I basically have 2 options... "wash and dry", or just get into the shower and rinse away.
My commode is from the 1970's and I live on the 3rd floor, so I can use a dinner napkin for the wash part -- and it will go down without clogging --- the "dry" dinner napkin just goes into the rubbish bin.
Clean and dry and not rough at all.

>give it a shot

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Since we are talking abiut anus problems, ive had a problem with mine since 2 months, everytime i shit a bit too much my rectum really hurts and i feel like there is something blocking the poop a bit, is it a hemorrhoid? Im 18 im not supposed have these kind of problems, i dont have a problem with low water intake

I was waiting for this topic to come up.
My problem Jow Forums is I have an incredibly hairy inner ass hole.
I could live with it if it weren't for the fact that when I have either sloppy or too firm a poop, the shit becomes intermingled with the hair. But it gets worse, when I go to wipe the toilet paper becomes intermingled with the shitty hair, binding parts of it together. I often have to tear the hair from my sphincter to get it all out, that have a shower everytime I poop.
Shaving is difficult and I can never get it all without hitting part of my hole, still leaving me with an issue, and the itch is also unbearable as the hair grows back and it grows back within a couple of weeks.
I tried using hair removal cream but that also burns like a motherfucker and people take one look at you buying it and immediately think you're gay.

Please help me Jow Forums. I have a hairy arsehole and I must shit.

I feel for you dude, but that was hilarious. Have you tried wax?

Just rip it out, it kind of feels nice if you're not a btich

Ripping it out is fine up to a certain point, but you underestimate the hairiness of my hole. At a certain point the binding of paper, shit and hair becomes too strong that it effectively becomes a wall. Trying to pull that out is like pulling chunks of your head hair out. I have to use a shaver to cut it back before shaving.
Once but I made a fucking mess of it. I should probably give it another try.

My asshole and bellend get itchy. Anti-fungal cream seems to help, but for the life of me I can't tell how I could've gotten a fungal infection there. Was I raped by a mushroom?

How do I take cleaner shits? I hate spending 20+ minutes just wiping.

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1. See a Gastroenterologist. They are the ones who handle asshole problems. Proctology isn't really a thing anymore. Your GI doc might recommend banding to remove a hemorrhoid, if it even is a hemorrhoid.
2. Try to consume more probiotic foods.
3. Drink more water.
4. Increase dietary fiber, or if you can't, try taking a psyllium husk supplement like Metamucil (but without aspartame).
5. Don't wipe too hard. If you have to wipe a lot, you might want to try a toilet seat bidet or if you're not at home, flushable wet wipes. Just make sure that you buy wipes that break down--a number of them do not, and will eventually cause major plumbing problems. I know that Cottonelle wipes break down because I read about them on Consumer Reports.

I had this a couple months ago. It's called a thrombosed external hemorrhoid. Basically, a blood clot formed inside the vein that runs close to the surface of the anus. It will go away on its own after a few weeks as the clot breaks up.

Eat more fiber. Flax seeds.

I have his exact same problem, thanks for making this thread user

Fiber and probiotic foods. I drink kefir and kombucha every day. I occasionally have messy ones, but most of the time they kind of slide out all at once with no pinching.

Protein farts are ripping my ass apart Jow Forums

Like it actualy hurts

wat do ;_;

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Stress. Stress is psychosomatic: it depletes your body's ability to heal (Marucha's Punch Biopsy study). Your anus is very fragile; the tissue is thin, the muscles are under a lot of stress, and the region is a bacterial warzone. When you are stressed the body suffers and this region is damaged because it cannot effectively respond to irritation and infection. Assuming that you are eating a healthy diet and you aren't using sandpaper to wipe your bum, I would say focus on removing surplus stressors from your life and finding ways to deal with essential stressors. Until then your body will continue to take the stress out on itself.

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go to some asian waxing service and maybe you'll get something extra

Hairy inner asshole? What is even that. I kind of want an asshole pic, for science. put cam on floor and take a pic like you're sitting on it.

user, I have Crohn's disease and hemmeroids are my life:
1. Control diet, diet can make your shits worse and partially inflame bits of your digestive tract - avoid soft/energy drinks and spicier foods, caffeine or other dieretics can ruin your butthole
2. Avoid stress
3. There are anti hemeriod creams that can help
4. See a doctor it's not a big deal and you might have something serious like Crohn's or cancer

Squatty potties are a fucking meme created by some poo in loo trying to get rich quick, ignore that shit, just try not to strain when you shit and be gentle with your butthole when you wipe

Except that they do make it easier to go. Want to know why hemorrhoids are almost unheard of in countries that have squatting toilets? Because it's much easier to go while squatting. It's how early man pooped.

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Would hemorrhoids cause me to have trouble holding my shits in? Or is it the anal sex?

No, it's because you are believing internet bullshit, tens of millions in India, for example, have hemorrhoids

squat plug

99% sure you have a hemorrhoid, if you can't see it then it's on the inside of your rectum, either that or you are bleeding internally in which case you have a few hours to live. Hemorrhoids are either caused by hardcore gay sex (which is most likely going to be your case) or pushing too hard when you poop combined with having a very hard and tough stool due to your diet. I've had hemorrhoids for 2 years now, I haven't taken any measures to heal it and it most likely won't heal unless I start eating a lot of vegetables and use proper remedies to help it heal (hemorrhoid creams, baths), if you want it gone then look into diets rich in fibres and some home remedies. If not, hemorrhoids aren't really an emergency, although sometimes they can lead to infections, sometimes they don't do anything but hurt and bleed when you poop and that's it.

Lol, fucking Americans and their terrible diets causing all sorts of problems, when will they learn?

Just pop your external hemmeriods with a needle. That's what I did, it's safe

>anal fissures

don't strain to shit EVER and use a suppository for a day or two every time you notice a little blood after wiping.

Don't eat foods that give you big, hard shits. Soft but firm is the way to go.

i just got this. have been using cream and its helped alot. i was fasting and cutting to lose weight. symptons were: itching and blood on tp. the itching at worse was horrible for me. other sympton was smelly liquid coming to boxers. im on day 8 on cream and it helped a lot. i also changed to low cal more veg and beans diet when this happened so dunno maybe my stomach doesnt like veggies too much. stopped IF and stopped taking whey. im also eating fiber alot. fiber doesnt help me i think. also too much fiber can cause it too.

shit sucks.

sounds like hemmies

just buy the cream its should be in pharmacy at least is in my country. feels bad going to the register..

I just use a milk crate and one of these

amazon.com/Luxe-Bidet-Neo-185-Elite/dp/B00P2XZIP2/ref=sr_1_1_sspa?s=kitchen-bath&ie=UTF8&qid=1544828727&sr=1-1-spons&keywords=bidet attachment&psc=1

leave toilet paper behind, it is murder on hemorrhoids. When I have to poop at work, i just wipe until i start bleeding and then take a shower as soon as i get home. holding it is not an option for hemorrhoids.

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If you're worried you're wiping too heavily, follow these steps to never rub your ass raw again.

1. Do the shit
2. Wipe all the low hanging fruit off gently.
3. To get the rest off, fold your toilet paper in half, and then in half again. Wet and wipe until clean.
4. To stop swamp ass, fold toilet paper in half horizontally until it has the thickness of a finger, and vertically once. It should have the dimensions of a small finger. Wet the toilet paper and

5. SPREAD THOSE CHEEKS. Stick that baby half-up there and let it sit. Let your ass clamp down on it. Then pull it out.
6. Repeat 4-5 until the TP is clean when you pull it out.
7. Dry

This cleans your sphincter and stops swamp ass.

>Americans
Patricians use water and toilet paper.

Everyone HAS hemorrhoids. The issue is when they get infected.

You either have a hemorrhoid, or a wart (probably from your mouth from wiping your ass with ur spit)

Do you feel any raised bulges or anything different near/in your asshole?

See a proctologist.

Get a Phillips body groomer. I use it on my whole body including ass and it's pretty effective.